Star Trek Enterprise Bk. 02 - Inherit Ch. 10

When Admiral Forrest's son, Nathan, started asking Captain Hernandez about Lt. D'Arcy, Erika seized the opportunity. She immediately led him over and broke in on the dance to introduce him to Danaë and allow him to cut in. Archer quietly stepped aside knowing that it would be good for the lieutenant to step out of her comfort zone and take another step towards living. The plan didn't work entirely as Captain Hernandez had hoped. Before she could bring up old times or even attempt to rekindle anything with Archer, Admiral Forrest came over and began talking to them. Still, she at least had Jonathan Archer away from Lt. D'Arcy.

When the song ended, the band began to play ' Moonlight Becomes You '. At first Danaë paid little attention to the music, her mind drifting elsewhere as Nathan rambled on about his own aspirations for space exploration. Her attention returned when the admiral's son began to speak of how he had kept abreast of everything that had happened during the mission and had even studied the mistakes he believed Archer had made, such as his handling of the Seleya. This was all in an effort to prepare himself so when took command he would handle things better.

This was aggravating enough but at the same time she began to recognize the music and remembered the last time she had heard it. It was at her sixteenth birthday and she had witnessed her father have a momentary bout of PTSD. In her childish innocence she had wanted to understand what her father had been through, nothing more. A few years later she had used his devastating experience with the Borg as a weapon against him. Well, she understood that trauma now and who was she to have ever judged him for it. Who gave this pampered admiral's son the right to stand in judgement of Archer, or any of them? How could he possibly understand what they had endured. Instantly she stopped dancing and pulled away, her eyes flashing like fire.

"Exactly how many star ships have you served on?" she asked.

"I-I haven't..." he stammered, embarrassed.

"A freighter?"

"No."

"Interesting." She glared, her temper starting to boil. "So you've never actually experienced feeling your vessel getting hit by a torpedo or blasted with a phaser. You don't know what it feels like to have the entire compartment you're standing in shake so violently that you're thrown to the ground. You haven't heard the metal creaking and bolts popping along with your own heartbeat as you pray and hope that it all holds together just long enough for you to get out of there before getting sucked into space." Her voice was getting louder as her ire grew causing the other guests to take notice and turn in their direction. "You've never watched helplessly as the blast from enemy fire cuts through the person next to you, melts their flesh or simply rains down broken metal crushing them. Sometimes all three. You've never been shot at by a phase pistol while standing there doing your job, knowing the next one could kill you. You do it anyway because there are too many lives at stake. You've never been part of a crew spending long days and nights on a starship for months or even years at a time, depending on each other for survival. They aren't just crewmates but family."

"I-I didn't mean," Nathan stammered, but Danaë didn't want to hear his excuses. She didn't have to be a witness to Archer's many long sleepless nights to know that he had them. She had seen her father endure them. There was nothing easy about being the captain of a star ship and sniveling idiots like the one before her didn't make it any easier.

"Oh I know what you mean. You see, you have the privilege of being able to look over every log entry view every decision from the comfort of your desk here on Earth and with the benefit of hindsight. You are not, nor will you ever be, in a position where you have to try and summon all your wisdom to make the right decision in less than thirty seconds. Sometimes decisions have to be made that will end up costing a cewman their life. No one wants to make those decisions. No one wants to be responsible for the loss of a crewmember." Hearing this Archer started to take a step forward but Erika's hand suddenly caught his arm and stopped him. Perhaps her reason was partly out of curiosity, but captain Hernandez also wanted to see just how deeply the lieutenant cared about her captain. "You speak in judgement of Captain Archer, but there are things you'll never see written in those reports. You'll never know how a piece of himself died every time a crew member was lost. How hard he fought to protect us, sometimes from ourselves." Tears sprung into Danaë's eyes as she thought of how close she had come to nearly destroying the Enterprise and Earth and how Archer had managed to bring her back from the brink. "He didn't just have his crew to worry about, he had the life of every man, woman and child on this planet weighing on his shoulders. From day one he was prepared to make the ultimate sacrifice if need be to end this conflict. Is your heart and character as strong as that?"

"I'm sorry... I didn't know," Nathan responded, more than a little humbled by her words.

"Well now you do." she answered coldly. "Heroes or cowards... the dead all look the same. Until you are standing in their place, who are you to judge the choices any of us make?"

Suddenly cognizant that the music had stopped and the restaurant had fallen silent with all eyes on her, Danaë immediately became embarrassed and afraid. She was certain she had gone way too far and undoubtedly upset Admiral Forrest and probably Captain Archer. With many apologies she quickly excused herself and hastily went outside. Following fast on her heels was Archer and after a minute or so Erika Hernandez excused herself and went outside to see if she could help.

Once outside Lt. D'Arcy ripped off her high-heels and hurried towards the nearest transport station so she could go home. The whole time she could hear the captain calling out 'lieutenant', but she ignored him and tried to keep going. She didn't want to hear overused platitudes or the reassurances that everything was going to be okay. She just wanted to be left alone, but after such a verbal explosion on what was supposed to be a celebration, Archer wasn't letting her disappear without some explanation. Reaching out, he managed to finally catch her arm and finally stop her. Certain he was either angry or at least disappointed in her behavior, she couldn't bring herself to face him. Instead she stared down at the pavement as her shoulders dropped.

"What the hell happened back there?" He waited a moment, but she didn't answer. All Danaë could think of was how many times her father had warned her about her temper. "Talk to me," Archer said in a stern but gentle tone. He had no issues backing up one of his officers or crewmen if he believed they were right, but he couldn't do that though if he didn't know exactly what had happened.

"I'm so sorry, captain, I should have held my tongue, I just... please give my apologies to Admiral Forrest and if I embarrassed you in any way, I am very sorry. I just couldn't stand listening to that little pissant tell me about his superior leadership skills."

"Oh." Archer responded, a soft smile playing on his lips. Given what he had heard her say to the admiral's son, he had suspected as much. "I wouldn't worry too much about Nathan's opinion. He's always been that way. Nobody takes him seriously, not even his dad the admiral."

"Good to know he's a natural born prick. The tossers never so much as left Earth's orbit, but he knows how everything should have been dealt with." she shook her head slightly knowing she had messed up with how she handled it. "I know, I know I should have kept my big mouth shut, but I couldn't help thinking of all the people we'd lost and everything we had gone through..." She put her hands to her temples, the faint thud of her headache starting to get worse.

"It's okay," he said with a slight laugh. He was trying to think of the last time someone had rushed to defend him in such a fashion and he couldn't.

"No it's not. I embarrassed you and everyone else in there." she scrunched her forehead and closed her eyes, trying desperately to make the dull ache go away before it switched to jackhammer mode. At the same time she was trying to act like there was nothing wrong with her and failing miserably.

"You were serious about having a headache earlier, it wasn't just an excuse to leave the party." he commented, gently placing a hand beneath her chin and making her look up at him.

"It's not too bad..."

"But it will be," he finished. He could see she was tired by the greyness beginning to appear beneath her eyes "Why don't you go back to Hoshi's and rest. I will take care of any problems that arise from Nathan Forrest."

"No, no I should go back and apologize..."

"Lieutenant, I need you to go home and rest. All of us need a good long rest." No statement was ever more true. She nodded and started to turn to go towards the transport station only to have Archer stop her again. "Lieutenant," he said, reaching out and taking her hand in his. "Thank you." he said as she looked back at him. "For what you said back there."

'I only spoke the truth."

The two stood there gazing at each other in a shared look of silent longing until the transport arrived and Danaë boarded and left. From the doorway of the restaurant, Erika watched the entire scene less than pleased at what she was witnessing. Perhaps to everyone else it was just a captain looking out for one of his crew members, but she could see something deeper happening and she didn't like it. Oh, she knew all about Danaë D'Arcy and there were still many questions regarding where she came from. Archer, himself, had spoken about her being from another time. Despite Erika's great respect for the captain, she wasn't so sure she believed in such things.

Respect for Jonathan Archer? Yes, she had that in abundance, but she also still harbored feelings for him. Inside her was a trove of warm memories from when they had dated. Who knows how far things might have gone if he had not been promoted to captain and become her superior officer. Looking at the two of them Erik thought about what she had seen between them since they had returned. It was subtle, but regardless of what was happening or how much space was between them, they never completely let the other out of their sight. If one were to stretch out so much as a little finger then the other would take it and follow.

Did she feel a little jealous, yes, but there was more to it than that. Erika was also concerned about the captain. They had remained good friends over the years and no one knew better than her how hard he had worked and how much of his life he had poured into Starfleet and his dream of exploration. She had watched him put in more hours, put aside other dreams and fight harder than anyone else just to make Starfleet a reality. He had poured every last drop of his blood, sweat and tears into this and now it all seemed to be jeopardized because of some woman who had appeared out of nowhere.

Over the last year she had read each and every report and knew that he had been under a lot of extreme pressure. Anyone would have found it difficult to nearly impossible to handle. What she was afraid of was that in a moment of vulnerability he had gone against his own better judgement. Captain Hernandez wanted very much to know the truth on this matter but the last thing she wanted to do was confront Archer about it. She could see that he still had a great deal on his mind. There was still the matter of his debriefing with Admiral Forrest, where he would have to answer a number of questions regarding his actions. Still, her rank and connections might be enough to make the lieutenant confess or allay any fears she had.