All Comments on 'Starcrossed Ch. 01'

This is good! i read it twice! you should keep going. i hope to see u write more.

I'm such a literotica addict and I'm going to have to keep an eye out for the next chapter of your work too now. Keep writing. I'll be reading :) x

I know you said it was kind of an homage to Cedar and Secret both authors I love, but you really have a different voice and it is awesome! I hope you continue with this story. One thing I would hope is that Alex respects Deena enough to let her know about Erina. Love this story

Not a bad way to start at all ;)

please keep it going

Descriptive and thorough! I really enjoyed it. I hope you continue with the story.

Excellent, as all your work is. Looking forward to the next chapter!

i must say that this sure has the beginnings of a very nice story. dont stop here and i am looking forward to a nice long story.......

Sort of hard to find a really well-written sci-fi/fantasy story in these parts but this was awesome and a great start. Right off the back I already kind of like Erina the best and that she already appears to have a close bond and relationship with Alex, but their positions prevent them from getting together. I can't wait to see more of Alex/Erina after the tease of this chapter. Keep up the great work and please update soon.

Wanting to know why he can't be with Erina, if she is a lady...like him and Deena. Can't wait to see what happens.

I haven't read any SF/Fantasy in ages but I followed Firebrain's feedback over here from the feedback portal. Lucky happenstance, that. Once I got in the rhythm of reading unfamiliar proper names, I found myself drawn in. You've done a wonderful job of creating intriguing characters with a minimum amount of exposition. I'm also impressed by the level of detail and believability of an entirely new world/universe. Well done! Looking forward to more.

It's great to have a plot to go along with the sex. The characters are interesting and developed. Can't wait to see where the story goes!

MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

continue pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease!

Great story, I do hope you continue.

Please continue and fast. I have no patience so please hurry.

...first, YES more please! Second, it would be luverly if you could find a way to make Erina and Deena be compatible so all three could be happy together. Let Alex be a good guy and not just use Deena.

Pretty please?

~ella

from reading the first chapter I can tell Erina is like "gets it done person" the person who has all connects and info. I have found I am already starting to love her personality I would love to see her stay close to the prince i would also like to see them get closer

I enjoyed the story alot. I did pick up at the beginning that he and Erina loved each other. I wonder how that will affect his relationship with Deena if he indeed picks her. I would hate to see her just be there to give him an heir and not have his love and his promise not to cheat on him emotionally or physically. I think you should certainly continue to post chapters.

What ever that other comment posted saying 'Erina and Deena should some how be compatible being together...'

NO. Alex should pick Deena and should realize it is HER that he loves...it is with DEENA that he could find the love his parents once had and could have the family he always wanted.

I am telling you this, just to make you aware, if you chose to somehow make this a triangle/threesome relationship, many readers will stop. It will need to be Alex and Deena....

There is no way those two could be 'together' to make all three of them happy. It better not go like that.

I would prefer if Alex chose Deena. She is the one that could make him happy... they would be able to have a love like his parents once had. And especially that family, Im sure both of them want.

Erina loves him, that is obvious, but laen's comment opens the possibility that Alex does not "love" either one of them as much as has a fond and happy contentment with them that suited his needs, while i think Alex and Deena should end up together, a crisis, which you set up with the terror attack at the start should allow for the two girls to find "true" loves and make the three couples a triumvirate of friends and fellow supporters

Don't listen to the anonymous whiners :) .

Erina is a great character and there's a fun taboo element to her story since she is not royalty. She and Alex definitely have great chemistry together and we need to see more of that.

please keep writing!

Please make it hard for Alex to get Deena! I do love a challenge, plus if Alex is going to have 2 ladies already in love with him, you should at least make Deena have someone else on the side to make Alex jealous :)

Okay I believe Alex will end up with Deena and ditch the other lovers cause who in their right mind would send someone else to have sex with Alex instead of her(Erina) sleeping with him?? Really? I'm pretty sure that Deena would not want some other lady sleeping with her man. But please don't make Deena a easy target for Alex, make Deena a hard to get heroin, someone that Alex will truly love forever! Please submit more soon, like very soon! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I'M begging you!!

KEEP GOING!!!

dont really think i need to say much about this story it was well written had vary few if any gramatical errors very well written overall and cant wait to see what comes next but just for starters take your time and make the story how you want it to turn out not how others want it although i totally think it should be Alex and Deena :p

Excellent start. Nice allusions to Cinderella. And you've set up very well the Deena/Erina conflict. Erina knows Alex has to take a wife, and knows that it is best if Alex and the Queen (to be) have a good relationship, but would feel very upset that Alex might end up loving Deena more than her. How will Alex and Erina resolve it; or maybe they won't.

beautiful

I have been reading stories on this site for a very long time and I must say this is one of the most delightful stories I have come across in far to long. Keep up the good work.

and it would be a shame if you didn't continue it!! *****

I'm not sure how you're going to pull off a romance with Deena if he loves Erina. I could see if it were only sex and affection... but love is serious.

I liked it a lot though and I'm looking forward to more chapters!

I wonder what complications you can arrange for Alex and Deena before they make things work in the end. Will Erina go away mad, go away happy, or stay around with all three of them being happy? Whatever you end up with, I really like the way it starts out.

Good job! Second chapter soon, please?

Great start! Let's see the rest!

Chapter 2?

No?

:(

I believe chapter two is in the queue.

Blame Literotica ;)

on the Monty Python reference. I half expected him to then start bursting into song. :D

Great start. Beautifully done. I like where it seems to be going. I hope there are many more chapters to this story.

I just finished this chapter because part 3 came out and it seamed interesting. I began with this chapter and I didnt want it to end. I liked the political intrigue, childhood friend angle, assistant that is loved and in love. I cant wait to read chapter 2.

Good job and I just know it will get better.

Excellent!!!

Well written I can't wait to see what happens next!

Reading your story makes it almost like you are there.