by chilleywilley
Love this author, but really dislike this story. Cheating ain’t never funny.
Decent premise but not super well written. This author is better than that. It was confusing in the middle and the end was so-so. 3-1/2 stars
What a stupid story. Phenomenally stupid. The only thing she learned is that she chose her affair partner wrong.
I feel horrible for the son. A cheating slut for a wife, and the father is more a piece of filth than a man.
Too complicated a plot.
Dawn is untrustworthy.
FIL is a pervert.
Did not like the story.
What a horrible excuse for a father. I weep for the son having to grow up with such an asshole.
Dude is a hell of a lot more imaginative and devious than the average moke and it makes for a humorous story. It reads like a love story between Gramps, daughter-in-law and grandson. The son was left as a secondary character that we don't care about. Alls well that ends well, this tale deserves a 4 at least for story and a 5 for humor.
Great fun. Agree that Gorski got off way to lightly. Actually, we don't know what happened when Gorski could not find his keys.
Lots of assumptions by commenters about the ending. Who is to say that Dawn and her husband never went to counseling? In the 10 year interval, Dawn may have confessed.
Also disagree that Dawn would definitely have stopped if confronted. She may have just become more careful and kept sneaking around. The narrator played on Dawn's superstitious nature to really motivate her on a different level to quit.
Some better proof-reading and editing would be helpful. I'm most annoyed when characters' names change during the story Jeanne vs Jane, etc.
Wow! Some people really don't like this story. I'll admit that while I do believe in forgiveness, I also believe in apologies. I'm on the fence with this one. But it makes me think and that's always a good thing.
Wow he really succeeded in stopping the affair...NOT! What do stupid story.
This reads like the plot from a Brian Rix farce (if you’re over 50 and live in the U.K. then you’ll know what I’m talking about). Unfortunately, comedy farces such a produced by Brian Rix and others have been killed by po-faced wokery. I enjoyed it. 4 stars.
Really!!!
A stupi story with a silly plot. All he had to do was talk with her, Jeanie was right.
Given Dawns character in the tale she would’ve reacted the same way when told by Pops what he knew. Instead he wasted time. Too stupid for words.
Earns 3/5
Not the best..
And after several stories I gotta point out:
Loose vs. lose
To vs too
Clothes vs cloths
It's vs It's
There vs their vs they're
Finely vs finally
And many more
Definitely has the makings of a good story and the ploy of putting on a comedy in the adjoining room is funny. But the language often sounds like late Victorian pornography. That may be the effect the author is trying to achieve but it gets in the way of the story. Americans, even Yankees from Massachusetts don't sound like this (I lived there for several years and knew everyone from doctors and lawyers to firemen and plumbers; really, they don't talk like the narrator, unless he is supposed to be some ponce on the Harvard faculty).
A good fun story.
To all the shitty commentators you obliviously failed to read the prologue with all the warnings about the story. That's why authors write prologues to inform or warn readers Duh...
Coulda just told her he had her recorded and he'd reveal it to his son if she didn't stop. The rest of it was just...meh. She should have been confronted.
Garbage.Jane was right,he should have confronted Dawn after the first time he saw her.If Dawn wanted some more cock he could have offered and kept it in the family.As for Michael,he got off too lightly.Why not tell Michael's wife to keep an eye on him,because he strays.
..a twisted incestuous FIL.. a fucked up DIL ... a sicko writer.. what an ungodly combination!
Clever, original and funny story story about flawed people, one of which was clearly a Biden voter. 😁
BOY, THERE ARE A BUNCH OF ANGRY PEOPLE READING, L W STORIES, WHO ARE LOST SOULS AND MAD AT THE WORLD. THIS IS THE FIRST STORY THAT I'VE READ THAT HAD A LITTLE HUMOUR IN IT. THE WAY I SEE IT IS THIS. HERE'S GRAMPS, WHO IS ALONE AT HOME. HIS ONLY FAMILY IS HIS SON, DAUGHTER IN LAW, AND GRANDSON. THAT'S HIS FAMILY AND HE WANTS TO KEEP IT FROM FALLING APART AND LOSING THAT MOST IMPORTANT PART OF HIS WORLD. HE WANTS TO END THIS AFFAIR WITHOUT ANY HARDSHIP TO ANY OF THEM. I UNDERSTAND HIS THINKING, BUT I DON'T KNOW IF I AGREE WITH IT. IF HE CONFRONTED THEM AT ALL, IT WOULD BE A DIVORCE OR, AT THE VERY LEAST AN UNHAPPY MARRIAGE WHERE DAWN MAY STRAY AGAIN ANYWAY. NOW HE SAID IN THE BEGINNING HOW HE LOVES HIS FAMILY AND DESCRIBES DAWN'S QUIRKY OUTLOOK ON CERTAIN SUBJECTS. HE USES HER BELIEF OF THE SUPERNATURAL AGAINST HER, TO SCARE HER BACK ON THE PATH TO HER FAMILY BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE. WHAT METHODS HE USED WERE ILLEGAL. HE KNEW THIS, BUT HE PUT HIS FAMILY FIRST BY INTENDING TO SAVE IT. I FOUND THE STORY ENTERTAINING FOR ONCE. 5***** AND IT'S ONLY FICTION.
Fun but kinda creepy with the father in law watching her get boned in the hotel and pee in the ice bucket, that was disgusting. This was a story where no one was innocent except for the kid
Like most of Chilley's work. But sorry, this ain't funny enough to cover the cheating.
the mans father could have stopped her from cheating in the first place that day, but chose to let her fuck around on his son for a month or two
I wouldnt disown my father, I'd put him six feet under
If I found my father did not tell me about my wife's affair I would never speak to him again. It is simply not his right to make my decisions for me.
It was long and took to much time to develop the plot. and she never suffered any consequences. she repeatedly cheated and got away with it.
That was dumb and boring.
Wish you would have put *that* warning into your preface’ list of why to pass on this piece O poop.
There's a study which claims older people tend to belief their own lies much easier than younger ones.
This story is a perfect example for why the elderly should be killed or at least put into a position where they can't do harm in any way.
Ceterum censeo the institution of "family" is the worst bane of modern mankind.
No father who loves his son would do what this shit head did and allow his daughter in law to betray his son. Total cuckold fantasy shit
The woman is cheating willingly and the father-in-law is planning high risk low gain intervention involving a bunch of other people, including police. Yeah right. Then in the end everything is resolved just like that without any consequences.
I'd say for the sake of humor this would be ok but I am not the one that sees any humor in a cheating spouse, certainly not here. You have to be Molliere to pull that off and you are not Molliere. Weak.
Well, this was fun and funny. Once in a jovial mood, it carried over into the comments, extending the lightheartedness.
Written in unusual, original style.
The comments that accuse -- well, that accuse anything, are missing the comedy and fun. Anyway, the comments that accuse him of not caring about his son? Hey, look at the elaborate and costly and time-consuming lengths he went to in order to keep son's wife from cheating on him.
All the while doing that, he does a little cheating himself. But of course that is different! (More laughs).
If all chilleywilley's offerings are like this one, maybe I should dole one out to myself now-and-then like I do my bag of candy to have some occasional sweetness.
Paul in Oklahoma
It's still a fun read, unique and the sex is quite imaginative.
I'll repeat the question I had back then: "Did they ever find the other shoe?"
Idk what else to say. The story was pretty terrible. That father is one of the worst fathers in the world. Seriously wtf was this shitty story?
Regardless of the writer's abilities to tell a story the premise is that of a despicable man who has no sense of honor and duty. If this character was my father I would kill him myself.
Who needs enemies when you have a father like this, he should be ashamed of himself, he allowed his son to be cockold coz he did not want to lose what he had. A true peace of shit.
She will cheat again. Next time she is bored while hubby works himself to death to provide all the material things she wants. The grandpa should have had his son's back and told him the truth. She wasn't sorry she did it, she was sorry she picked the wrong dude to cheat with and some weird things happened. She is an idiot and he is a failure as a dad (and grandpa).
His daughter-in-law is unethical, immoral, and, most importantly, stupid. Why would he want his son and grandchildren tied to a selfish ignorant loser like her? She quit fucking around entirely due to external influences: no sense of guilt, remorse, or lack of self respect. She felt entitled to fuck around to cure her boredom, and she loved it. She lacked the gumption or determination to try to fix her boring marriage, but was OK with adultery, betrayal, and risking breaking up her child's family. And this is the woman he wanted to keep his son connected to?
A pathetic attempt at levity and philosophy when tough love and justice were needed.
But thanks for trying. And thanks for stop trying.
Nothing entertaining about this story at all. Who would want a father like him? I would have to tell my son and to hell with the consequences. And what decent man could ever look at such a daughter in law with anything other than contempt?
Chilley, I like your writing and most of your stories but you let the bad guys off without punishment often. Mike needed some serious bad Karma. He was a pig and rapist. His wife should have received edited video. And his car should have ended up in the crusher just for a start. Then his balls needed some adjustment via a big stick (or bat).
Would have my back and not my wife's. She got off way too easy. And for a father to keep his son in the dark about the whole thing...really sucks. If somehow the son ever found out...their relationship would be ruined. Sorry gave the story a "1'.
But thanks for the effort.
"Buckeye Fan"
Wouldn't it be niece if truth always came out, if the just triumphed, wrong doers were punished, but the world doesn't work that way. Sometimes there are no consequences for our actions.
Of course in feel good stories that's what always happens
Chilley
Well written story, but the character of the wife that you draw would never allow her to be faithful when tempted in the future. However, an entertaining story and well written.
- It trivializes her betrayal
- It has the father-in-law watching his daughter-in-law naked and fucking another
man
- he seem to spend his whole time wise cracking about what they are doing (none of it funny with no feeling of anguish or anger about her betrayal and disrespect of his own son
- he just sits and chats with her at the kitchen table telling the readers that he actually likes her as if he had no care in the world and she wasn’t stabbing his son in the back
- and why does she stop not because of her feeling of guilt but because she thought her their affair was cursed
In the end like other stories of this so-called author it ends up with no consequences for the cheating wife, no remorse, no emotion, nothing at all. What was the fucking point of the story other than for the unfeeling author to show how ignorant, illiterate and unfunny he is.
1* It would be less if possible. Why couldn’t he just tell her he knew about her cheating and challenge her conscience to stop it instead of all this stupid cloak and dagger stuff. The author must be juvenile at best. No words can express my dislike of this story!
I enjoyed this even if the protagonist is morally bankrupt.
A father that cares more about his daughter-in-law than his son, with a father like that the son does not need enemies.
there is a lot more that Pandora has. TK U MLJ LV NV
Just...what a father...He seems to love more his daughter-in-law than his own son...defending his son's marriage? Will she never cheat again? Will he be watching over her all the time? And when he dies? Who will watch her? Even after all the signs she fucked the lover in her own house, her own bed!!! 1*
BUT it was his relative getting shit on - a strange way to help and protect but this time it worked -
She asked him: ""You aren't mad at me?"... And of course he couldn't be mad...he also was fucking two married women...What moral could he have? If he had morals he could have destroyed the cheaters..His son would be better alone than with a cheating wife.
Cute story with some occasional intended humor. Also had lots of unintended humor occasioned by the misspellings. Would I have wanted my father to tell me? Probably. Let me decide if she deserves forgiveness.
Great a father that covers up his sons wife cheating,you should write a story about that.
Hate to have a backstabbing father helping me be a cuckold in my life.
A sad tale.
Twisted and seriously messed up individuals.
It is not for the father to make his son's decision for him about the son's cheating wife.
His role is to be a loving father, FAITHFUL to his son.
There are worse things than not seeing your grandson.
Not seeing your SON (after he finds out about everything, including perving on the wife) is one of them.
But then, given the intro, it doesn't sound like the father cares that much for his son anyway. He probably just hopes for the day he'll have a crack at the wife (his daughter-in-law.)
"Pops" f*ck buddy is correct: he has (more than one) screw loose.
I feel sorry for the son.
And of course, "Pops" feels as he does, f*cking other men's wives himself!
Hopefully, at the end of his life the son won't find out his wife was a whore.
Thank you for your effort, but well intended or not, I doubt most men want a father like this one.
Very creative with enough realism to keep this reader engaged and invested. Hope you're working on other stories. I for one will be looking for more stories from you. Thanks.
This garbage shoudn't have been pulished outside of dementia asylum.
"1*" !
WTF? Pound on the door - dawn I know you are in there open the fucking door NOW. If you do this again I will make sure you pay and asshole you are dead meat if you are the cause of a family breakup.
But no! Who wants apiece of shit like this for a father? And the wife is a piece if cheating garbage whore who fucks this guy in the marriage bed.
Sorry dude this sucks all the way around.
An interesting story, but not a smooth read. Thanks for the offering.
There is a difference between you fucking some other man's wife and your son's wife fucking a married man. Figure it out. Thank for this good, raunchy and funny story. Karma is a funny thing.
The father is interesting. Has an issue with his daughter in law cheating on his son but has no problem sleeping with two married woman.
Well, a variety of comments on this one from everywhere in the spectrum.
As for me, I enjoyed the heck out of it. You wrote an original, ornery, yet
wholesome - with - love tale and I really appreciated reading it.
So much writing isn't really original, so much hasn't had the effort invested
that you have here.
Thank you for writing and don't stop your creative juices flowing. It seems
there is plenty of fun stuff rattling around inside you.
Regards,
-Pultoy
as was previously stated, the father horribly failed his duty to his own son. What a shame.
I loved the shenanigans. Very elaborate and generally almost plausible. In addition to Jean being Jeanie (OK) and Jane (less OK), she was also Joan, sometimes in adjoining paragraphs. Most word processing programs have a word count feature, and if you find more characters than you should have, there's a fixable problem.
... and screw the haters. It was a strong story with likable and diverse characters.
Ignore the losers who insult your protagonist. He was a neat father. If I had any of the losers as a father, it would have been better to be aborted. One compliment from Harddaysknight was worth all of the bullshit from the shortdicks. Keep writing.
His father knows his son's wife is a slut and keeps it quite. Please anyone other than the fag stalker that keeps following me around would dump the bitch. So fucks this guy reguardless of the reasons and you just let this slut cuckold your son and you say nothing. If I had a dad like him I would rather be adopted.
to keep a family together. The penguin took a serious incident and made it humourous. TK U MLJ LV NV
I laughed my way thru your comedy more times than I could count, except I wasn't counting. Great fiction, and not related to heavy sex.
Write more any time.
I do fine it funny that what some hate with bizarre passion, others enjoy and find humor in the stories.
I think the former are unable to appreciate that I am not telling of anything that really happened, at least as far as I know. It all comes from my imagination.
As to morality, how can you read pornography, and complain about the morals of the characters?
People come in so many variations
Chilleywilley
Unfortunately - we may or may not like what was written here but it is all to plausible in principle.
Older folks generally are more tolerant of others foibles - mostly when they are not being directly abused by them but still. Too many youngin's are denser than a steel I beam and by the alien conspiracy, existential rationalization of alternative outcomes etc because they provide refuge from responsibility and accountability they also give people a means to and end without facing the road they should have to travel to get there - quick fix Mc Donald's mentality.
Gramps found a way to make it better - not right just better. Nicely conceived and executed story - whatever our thought about the morality.
the f i l is such a sweet guy. he also does married pussy and fucks his own son too!
Doesn't Robert deserve to know what kind of woman he is married to? Robert gives the better part of his life and fortune to a whore, and takes responsibility for bringing 3 lives into the world with her, and his Dad treats it like a game?? Grow up Dawn; grow up Dad.
However, as soon as I read it is old folk, I skipped to the end and gave it 1*.
Straight from an asylum for insane! I only skipped thru it and it already made me puke.
How can anyone write this and not be on mind altering drugs? This shit is just unreal !!
This story had great drama, humor, and enough editing needs to make me cringe. The play of characters was superb. The numb nut husband in absentia was the center of the action, with the others revolving around him. Good work and thanks for a great read of male and female characters.
I'm just happy my Dad was a total man and nothing like your character.
I like a good imaginative story. I hadn't run across this way of handling a cheating problem before and found it outragiously funny. Keep it up!
1 I didn't remove anyone's comments
2 I think stories should be entertainment, plot and humor count
3 I did have an editor, but we are all amateurs here, especially because the readers pay nothing. So while is is wonderful to get a professional story, it's the exception on this site.
4 We are all above average. Most of us think we are good at sex and driving the car, even though we generally have no training in those arts. Writing is no different.
5 I had fun writing this story, Hope you had fun reading it.
Boring and so utterly predictable. Author - ever heard of plot devices?
Its odd... if authors dont like or want the "torch the bitch " filling their feedback with excessively negatuve comments... that seems to be OK thing to do.
But why is it somehow Ok for the author to delete ANY comment he doesnt like?
Among all of your silly restrictions, admonitions, etc., in your paltry prelude you stated at the end..."if you want to read a good story, read on", or something similar.
What makes you think it was a good story?