by themellowsaxophone
A fun read. Minor typos (an hour or too s/b two, he must have seen s/b she) and maybe a different word needed (derision? maybe elation, or delight?), but nothing to detract from a short, fun story. It does beg the question, what public place will Allyson pick to "study" next?
Feel free to delete this if you correct the mistakes.
"speaking off which"
"climbing onto my nap, naked,"
"and perv at the me"
I find myself wondering exactly what size the cubical is, but it's not important. :)
Apart from the few errors, one of which actually made me temporarily confused a bit further down from it, I have no complaints.
There was an element or two that are not exactly my thing (not a complaint), but there were more than a few elements that I particularly did appreciate.
The positives far outweigh the negatives, so I say well done. I was not satisfied, but I was pleased.
Short quick and sexy. Nice first story, develop it a little more and add detail, characters are enjoyable and dialogue is good.
This is a fun story. However, there are a number of typos and grammatical mistakes. You should review and fix them.
I haven't had sex but i have masturbated in college library study cubicles. It is pretty fun and can be quite private depending on which cube and the time of day or week,
GinaC
Good writing, fun idea. I wish you had taken more time with some parts, such as her undressing, it happens so quickly. But overall I enjoyed the story very much.
I had some study partners in college who I certainly wanted this to happen with, but alas, it never happened. Thank you for putting this fantasy into words
Despite the mistakes a good short story with plenty of scope to go places with the characters. Left me wanting more of these two.
Interesting and juicy story. I was a bit confused about this part:
"Oh, well... I definitely respect your views." I replied, pausing to lick her from her lips to her slit, flitting in and out of the perfect cavern.
She was sitting on his lap immediately before this part. I'm wondering how he got her off his lap, licked her from lips to slit, tounged her pussy, then had her sit back down on his lap.. all in 1 line. Impressive..