Sunlight

Ben waved his hand like he was swatting a bug. "Don't give me that techno-babble horse shit of yours."

"I'm not Ben. It's just how it works."

Ben moved his head back and forth. He looked over at Aliana. "Listen, Aliana. Listen to the trees. What do you hear?"

Aliana tilted her head, straining to pick up a sound. Any sound. I couldn't hear anything but the wood pop and snap in the fire.

"I hear nothing but the fire," Aliana said.

Ben sat back in his chair. He drew in a long deep draw from his pipe, letting the smoke out the corner of his mouth.

"Where's the sound of a coyote calling her pack? Where's the sound of the barn owl's wings when they open, just before he glides down from his perch? Where's the squeak from the mouse as the owl's talons close around it? Aliana, listen to the trees..."

Aliana cocked her head trying to pick out sounds even more intently. She looked over at me, her eyes filled with questions for which I didn't have answers.

"I don't hear those things tonight. I don't hear anything."

Ben leaned back into his chair. Smoke from his pipe filled the still air.

"Ben, it's just charged particles from the sun—" I cut off my words, knowing Ben wouldn't hear any of my logical explanations.

He pulled the stem of his pipe from his mouth and pointed it toward the sky. He shook his head, more determined than ever to convince me. "Damn it, Walter," he said cupping the bowl of his pipe in his hand. He moved the stem of his pipe across the sky. "That's not right and you know it!"

"Ben," Aliana began, trying to defuse the conversation, "I've told you before, arguing with an engineer is like mud wrestling with a pig. No sooner than you start, you're covered in mud and the pig is just beginning to enjoy it."

Ben slipped his pipe back onto his mouth. The familiar snap of his lighter brought the tobacco to life. Ben leaned back down into his chair. Like an angry dragon, his pipe glowed orange and then Ben blew out a puff of smoke.

"I got some bean and bacon soup warming on the stove. Let me get you a bowl," Aliana said then stood and took a few steps toward the house.

Ben's twisted around in his chair while he watched Aliana walk toward the house. "With some of your yellow corn bread, too, I reckon." His voice went high. Ben caught himself and I watched his face blush. "Aliana makes the best corn bread in the county," he said.

Aliana looked over her shoulder. "I heard that Ben. What good would a bowl of beans and bacon be without corn bread?" She smiled back at us sitting by the fire.

With Aliana's return, and between spoons of soup, the conversation soon drifted back to politics. Aliana was the lucky one, she soon tired and while curled up in her chair, she fell asleep.

Ben grew quiet. He pushed another plug of tobacco into his pipe. I let the fire slowly die allowing darkness to cautiously creep upon us. A bed of soft orange and red ambers flickered while transparent blue flames danced together when they'd catch a slight puff of breeze.

Ben leaned out from his chair, and cradled the bowl of his pipe in his hands. He stared down at the dying ambers. "She's a beautiful woman, your Aliana. She reminds me of those expensive glass figurines the church going ladies keep in locked curio cabinets. Delicate and fragile yet impossible not to touch."

I looked over at Ben and couldn't agree more with him. Aliana was all of that and more.

"She's quite a girl. She reminds me of my Dorcy," Ben said. He thumped his pipe in the palm of his hand, knocking out a hunk of ash.

We sat in silence while he refreshed the tobacco. The snap of his lighter—a flash of orange—a puff of smoke. "Walter, do you know what a tin can is?"

"Besides what green beans come in? No, not really."

"During WWII, a tin can was a light destroyer. Thinly armored, under gunned, but fast. Their biggest bang was the torpedoes they carried."

I leaned out from my chair. "Ben?"

"It wasn't quite Halloween in 1944, but I've never been so damn scared in my life. For three days in late October we fought the whole damn Jap Navy in the Battle of Leyte Gulf."

Several quick puffs of smoke drifted through the night air. I folded my hands together.

"I saw men puke on the deck, shit themselves where they stood. I saw men curl up and hide under the stairs crying for their mothers. And yet, I saw men do things even God would never ask them to do. I witnessed first hand heroism I didn't believe was possible."

He looked up at me, his eyes red and watery. "Ben, you don't have to do this." Yet, I sucked up in his words like a dry sponge, savoring each one of them as he spoke of the battle.

"I was a gunner," he continued, "All we had were five-inch guns; like throwing rocks at those Jap battleships. Our shells just bounced off. We had to get close to use our torpedoes. Damn awful close, Walter. We charged—full speed. Our turbine engines screamed in agony. We dropped smoke—we fired our guns—we fired everything we had. We kept coming closer and closer. Waves broke over the bow. We kept coming. The intercom crackled with orders. The shells were getting closer. The Japs were dialing in our range. We kept going. Our captain would steer toward the shell splashes to confuse the little bastards. We got so close I swear you could see if that Jap looking back at us needed to shave. They had our range. We dropped our torpedoes..."

For the next several hours Ben told me the story of his life. How the Battle of Leyte Gulf nearly cost him his leg. How he fell in love with a nurse on a hospital ship. The woman he would later marry—Dorcy. It was close to four in the morning when he stood and slipped his pipe back into his pocket.

"Reckon I'd best get home."

I walked with him down our lane to the dirt road with Bo tagging along beside him as usual. He extended his hand out to me but instead of just shaking it, I grab it, and moved my hand up to his elbow and shook his entire arm. "Yours truly was the greatest generation this country ever had."

Ben beamed back a rare smile. I could see his eyes water. "I miss her. I miss her terribly."

"Dorcy?"

"Yeah, Dorcy. It's been almost sixty years. I lost her in '54."

"You should have remarried, Ben."

"Naw, you only find a woman like that once in a lifetime." He looked directly in my eyes. "If something happened to Aliana, could you just replace her with another?"

He had me on that one. "No...I couldn't."

"I remember. Before that damn cancer got her, she told me she'd wait for me. She'd wait for me in heaven. She's waited a long time now, Walter. Perhaps too long."

"Don't you go doing something stupid now, Ben."

Ben looked over at me. "Would you share a drink with me?"

"I'd be honored to."

He reached into his rear pant pocket and pulled out a small shinny hip flask. He twisted the top off, placed the flask to his lips, and tilted his head back. A few gulps later he handed the flask to me. He wiped his mouth off with the back of his arm. "Here you go."

I tilted my head back, took one swallow, I instantly pulled the flask from my lips. I poured what I deemed liquid lava down my throat. I coughed. I gagged. My eyes turned red. I bent over.

"Oh Christ!"

"Ah, that's a good batch," he said with a bit of pride in his voice.

"Smo—oth, too," I managed to choke out between gulps of breath. I knew Ben relished my displeasure by the way he grinned.

"Corn's up already. Looks like a good crop. Figure about fifteen maybe twenty gallons per acre this year. But, I don't know. Perhaps I'll just let this crop go to seed."

I found my breath yet still coughed a few more times. "Ben, how about getting in my truck and let me run you and Bo back home?"

"Naw," Ben said as he rubbed Bo's head, "me and Bo, we got one more trip in us don't we girl?"

I swear that dog knew what he was saying and if dogs could smile, I saw one form on Bo that early morning. I stood and wave him on his way, watching till I could no longer see their shadows from the moonlight. I returned back to the fire pit, picked up Aliana and took her inside.

*******

A week passed and I couldn't quite shake a feeling I had that perhaps Ben knew what he was talking about. All during the week, the Aurora had been seen as far south as Mexico City. I couldn't put my finger on it, but that knot in my gut just wouldn't fade away. Perhaps it was the unrelenting heat wave that seemed to grip the entire country. I loosen my tie, pointed my car in the direction of home and clicked off the miles. One good thing about living out in the county is the tranquility. However, when you need to drive over fifty miles each way it does get kind of old.

Traffic seemed to be lighter than normal and my usual hour and a half trip seemed to flash by. Soon I pulled down our dusty dirt road and turned into our farm. I noticed Aliana was waiting on the porch by the front door. I got out of my car and walked up to her.

"Hi. Ah, something wrong?"

"Its Ben."

I took off my jacket, pulled my tie out from around my neck. "What did that old goat do this time? Someone turned him in for selling shine again?"

Aliana didn't say a word. She just put her arms around my neck and leaned her head on my chest.

"Aliana? What's wrong with Ben?"

"He's gone."

"On vacation?"

"No...honey, Ben's gone."

She pulled me into the house. On the kitchen table I saw his pipe and lighter. My heart dropped to my feet. A small yellowed envelope lay next to them. I looked at Aliana, and picked up the envelope. I pulled out a small sheet of paper. In jerky script I read the note. My hand dropped the paper and it floated in silence to the tabletop.

"Ah damn it Ben." I felt Aliana's hand on my shoulder. "When did they find him?"

"This afternoon. He's been dead for a few days. His dog, too."

"Bo?"

"Yeah." Aliana rubbed my shoulder. "He apparently made a small charcoal fire in a hub cap, placed it in his truck along with him and Bo and they just went to sleep."

My mind returned to last Saturday night and the stories he told me. He had planned this all along.

"That's why."

"Why what?" Aliana asked.

I reached for Aliana's hand and took it into mine. "Ben said he would tell me about the time he served during World War Two, but only before he died."

Aliana held me tight. Her tears soaked into my shirt.

*******

The sky that night had at last returned to normal, no more Aura. I stared out of the open window, my mind wandering from one thought to another without stopping. It was hard trying to sleep, so I got up from bed trying not to wake Aliana. I went outside on the porch.

I looked up at the night sky. "What are you doing out there?" I asked in a hushed voice.

I felt Aliana's hand on my shoulder and then her fingers wrapped around my left hand.

"You talking to God?"

"No, not really. You couldn't sleep either?" I squeezed her fingers gently.

Aliana's breasts push into my back. "I was just thinking about Ben," she said, "Honey, do believe in God?"

"Where'd that come from?" Thinking for a few moments, I looked at her. "I don't know. The universe operates under strict rules of physics—of mathematics."

Aliana grinned back. "Well then, who wrote down the rules?"

Ben would have been proud of Aliana. She had me in a corner and it happened too fast; I didn't even see it coming. "I don't know." I returned her smile. "I guess, perhaps...you know maybe..."

Aliana enjoyed my frustration then she said, "God wrote the rules."

"All right," I conceded to her, "someone did."

She grinned ear-to-ear, savoring my quick and easy defeat. Aliana looked up at the sky. "Do you think we're all alone?"

"Since when did you become so philosophical? But since you asked. No, the universe must be teeming with life. There's just too much out there." I wondered what had gotten into Aliana.

"Are you sure?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Why not? As the late astronomer Carl Sagan once said, "Those worlds in space are as countless as all the grains of sand on all the beaches of the earth."

"Do you think Ben's up there? Up in heaven?"

"I don't know that either, Aliana. He told me last weekend before Dorcy died she promised Ben she'd wait for him in heaven. You know Ben was getting up in the years. His mind—"

"Would you wait on me? I mean if you were to go first. Would you wait?"

"Of course, why wouldn't I?"

"Will you promise me, Walter. Promise me right now?"

I've never seen Aliana like this in our ten years of marriage. Ol' Ben must have rattled her cage good. "Yes, I promise."

She stomped her foot down on the porch, the tone of her voice amplified by my short answer. "Say it like you mean it!"

I took her hands into mine. I looked Aliana squarely into her eyes, and glanced at the starry sky that draped over our heads. "As the stars are my witness, I promise you no matter how long it takes, I'll wait for you till we're together."

Aliana's cheeks glowed in the starlight. "I too, as the stars are my witness, I promise I'll always wait for you."

Aliana pulled herself in as close as she could, hugging me tightly. I couldn't figure out from where this was all coming, but right now, it felt damn good. We held each other in the darkness, listening to the coyotes call their young. Aliana took a few steps back, slipped a spaghetti strap of her nightshirt down her arm, then pulled down the second one. Aliana wiggled the shirt down her body then she kicked it to one side. Aliana held out her hand. "I want you."

I followed her back into the house to our bedroom. She pushed me down on the bed and soon she was beside me.

"Tonight, Walter, do with me as you please."

I raised an eyebrow then reached down and squeezed her little butt. "Anything?"

She bit her lower lip then smiled. "Anything whatsoever..."

We listened to the sounds of the trees while I hugged her as tightly as I could. I kissed her eyes, and then kissed her cheeks.

"I think I'd like to give you something tonight."

"And what would that be?"

"Let's try for that baby again..."

****

A month passed. Our team was making progress with the air scrubber in unit two. I normally like to stay out in the field, getting my fingers dirty with the guys that run the equipment, but today, I had to get my paperwork in order for another meeting. I dreaded those never ending meetings and reports. It seems that life consists of forms in duplicate. Whoever said we'd have a paperless society lied. Maybe he got caught up in a meeting?

I worked through piles and piles of papers that needed to be filled out. I heard the distinct sound of Aliana's voice talking to some of the office staff.

"Hi," she said as she poked her head through the doorway.

"Why hi. This is a surprise. You sure look good. Why's my county girl all spiffed up?"

Aliana pulled her dress out from her side. "You like it? You really do? It's the one that Mary made for me. She just dropped it off this morning. I had to run into the city. I was hoping maybe you'd take me out for lunch?"

My eyes followed Aliana's feminine form; her dress matched her honey gold hair as she walked across the room. Aliana's white heels gave her a business executive look that I found mesmerizing.

Aliana sat in one of the office chairs, her legs slanted to one side. She crossed her ankles and turned slightly causing the side of her dress to ride up her thigh. The hem of her dress had to be five inches above her knees, and when she turned just so, I caught a glimpse of a stocking top.

I cocked my head to one side and tried not to allow my smile to become embarrassingly large. "Wow! Oh damn, Aliana."

We made our way to a small Bistro that I enjoy. It was downtown and an easy walk. The place was busy and all they had was a small booth in a far dark corner. It seemed that fate intervened, as I knew I wasn't going to be able to keep my hands off my wife. I think both of us silently said 'yeah!' when the waiter led the way to the darken area. I ordered a drink for myself, Aliana wanted ice tea.

Aliana slid in first. No sooner than I sat, she moved over next to me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her push the hem of her dress up almost to her hips. She pushed it so far that I could see the tops of her thigh-highs.

Aliana picked up my hand and placed it high on her thigh. My fingers wiggled between the stocking's welt and her soft skin. I grew bolder and stretched out my hand until my fingertip touched the small elastic waistband of her panties. I pulled it out from her body, playing with it under her dress. I went for broke and moved my finger inside her panties and with the back of my knuckle I stroked the soft moist hair between her legs. A muted 'ooh' fell from her lips as I touched her.

My fingers moved down her thigh resting on her knee. "All right, what's going on?"

Aliana fussed with her dress. "I'm in love." She smiled back. She sipped her drink.

"I see. I snapped the nylon on her legs. You know it's awfully damn hot to be wearing stockings."

"I went to the doctor today. He told me I'd better get used to wearing these on my legs."

"Now, wait a second. Since when did any doctor prescribe wearing nylons?"

Her face blushed and she fidgeted with the silverware then her fingertips touched my hands. "Maybe not exactly what I have on, perhaps a lot thicker like compression hose. I'm so small, he was afraid I'd have vein problems in my legs and that wouldn't be good during pregnancy."

I watched Aliana's face turn red. I saw a few tears build in the corners of her eyes then they broke free and meandered down her cheeks.

"You're—"

Aliana nodded her head. Her whole face lit up. "I'm two weeks late. So I made an appointment to see my doctor. I'm pregnant. I thought I'd explode in your office... I wanted to tell you then."

"We're pregnant! I mean you're pregnant?"

Aliana closed her eyes for a second then she smiled. "Yes, Walter, we're pregnant."

I jumped up knocking over our drinks. I dashed from table to table, shaking hands of strangers. I kissed every waitress I saw. I might have kissed a couple of busboys, too. "Aliana's pregnant. My wife's pregnant. Did you hear the good news?" I told each and every one of them.

I stood in the middle of the restaurant, and I looked around and saw Aliana leaning on a table. Everyone stopped eating. No one was talking. They were all watching Aliana and me. I turned slowly around looking at their faces. I raised my hands up to my waist, palms open, and then looked back at Aliana.

"My beautiful wife Aliana is pregnant with our first child. I'm going to be a dad."

I walked over to her and swept her off her feet. I sat on an open chair with Aliana on my lap. I ran my hands up her arms till my hands were cupping her face.

"Aliana, I love you." I kissed her and the restaurant erupted with the sounds of applause and whistles.

**** It felt good to be heading home after another long and busy week. We were invited to Mary's house for Jessy's birthday—he's turning eighty Saturday. I pulled out into traffic and headed home. Another long and lonely drive home awaited me, and although I wasn't particularly anxious to go to a birthday party, I pressed the accelerator down just a bit harder. I wanted to get home and see how Aliana was feeling. Morning sickness had become part of her routine for the last several weeks.

Before long I pulled off the main road, and where we lived, any highway with lines down the middle constitutes a major highway. The tires rolled down a few more miles until I saw our old red farmhouse nestled quietly in a grove of maple trees.

As I turned into the drive I noticed Aliana standing beside the porch just a few yards in front of two sugar maples. She stood motionless and it seemed she didn't notice the cloud of dust that slowly crept over the yard. I got out of the car and walked over to her.