Sunlight

****

The news was getting out. As I drove home, all the larger stores had people standing in line, trying to get in. I saw a few fights erupt. We had food in the milk house, but I deemed a few more supplies would be a good idea. So, I stopped at every drug store, every convenient store, and every mom and pop store on the way home. I drove home as fast as I could.

No sooner than the cloud of road dust caught up with me, than Aliana bolted from the house. "Is it true? Walter, what's wrong?

"Remember a few months back I told you and Ben Mr. Sun was blowing his nose at us?"

Aliana nodded in agreement.

"Well, Mr. Sun has a really bad cold and he's going to be coughing on us for a while. We're going to live in the milk house till this is over."

I didn't want to out and out lie to her, but telling her the truth wouldn't have done either one of us a bit of good. I saw Aliana's face fill with terror.

The milk house was the perfect shelter. It was sunk deep into the earth and had a massive reinforced concrete roof almost a foot thick. Ben told me this milk house was the repository for all the local farms. It had a unique feature. Before rural electrification, our artesian spring water ran through pipes along the walls. The milk cans were lowered into the milk house and it was flooded with water. The artesian spring kept the water cold which kept the milk cold. I'd love to shake the hand of the guy that engineered it. We used it for storing our canned food and other root cellar crops. It would become our life raft.

"I need you to get all the food into the milk house," I told Aliana, "Get clothing and clean out the medicine from the bathrooms. Put everything in the milk house. I'm going to take the truck and I'll be back in a hour."

Aliana looked like she was going to say something, but smiled and ran back inside the house. My task was simple. I was going to steal the solar panels that ADOT installed on dead man's curve. Batteries from the cars, the solar panels, I'd have some electrical power. When I returned, I piled dirt on top of the milk house using the frontend loader on my tractor. We were going to be busy for the next twenty-four hours.

Aliana and I had packed the milk house full of supplies. The artesian spring would provide us with both drinking water and cooling of the interior. I hooked a wire from an old section of barbwire fence that ran around the east side of the farm. The other end went inside the milk house to an old spark plug. When the CME hits, the spark plug would snap.

We sat together, hand in hand and waited. One early evening, we heard the sound of the spark plug as an arc jump across the electrodes. That spark plug zapped on and off for several days until it quit. I opened the hatch and stuck my head out. It was three in the afternoon, yet the entire landscape looked like an overexposed photograph. Tony, the asshole accountant, was right. It looked like the ozone layer was gone and the unrelenting ultraviolet rays of the sun were beaming down upon us without mercy. I lowered my head, closed the hatch, and held Aliana in my arms. The beginning of the end had started.

*****

A month had passed. We slept during the day, we couldn't be outside because of the UV rays, and came out at night. I was pleased with myself. We had plenty of water, the artesian spring was keeping us cool, and we had a good stock of food. What I didn't plan on was boredom. We read books, played board games, we made love, but after a while no matter what we did, we grew bored. As soon as night fell, we were outside.

It hadn't rained for months. I walked up to our home, the grass looked like cheap tan carpet that sloped up to the front porch. It crunched when you walked on it. The lilac bushes were dead and in the dim light of the early evening, they looked like plants from an alien world with their roots in the air. The UV rays turned our bright red house into some kind of muted pink. I felt Aliana's fingers wrap around my hand. Aliana's grip tightened around my fingers when she looked around. The trees were dead. Her trees were dead. Their voices she no longer could hear.

The moon was just coming up from the east. Large black clouds with orange underbellies loomed overhead. We both saw a flash of light and then the familiar sound of a clap of thunder. It started to rain! The raindrops sizzled when they struck the barren earth. We stood in the rain hugging each other. The water felt so good so we soon got naked and splashed in the rain like a couple of school kids. Aliana's hair sparkled in the moonlight while she walked up the sidewalk splashing in the puddles as they formed.

The rain was steady, not hard, but warm. Aliana had the widest smile on her face that I ever saw. She walked half dozen steps toward me when her smile instantly disappeared. Suddenly, she grimaced then her arm bent around her tummy. I saw her knees close together. She looked at me. Then down at the rain running down her legs. In a matter of seconds the rain took on a dark hue, and then a rusty blood red.

"Walter!"

I rocketed over catching her in my arms. I noticed the products of conception lying on the sidewalk. I covered her eyes with the palm of my hand and led her back to the milk house. I knew. Aliana did as well. She had miscarried. Our firstborn was not to be.

Drying off Aliana, I dressed her and tried to comfort her the best I could. I gave her some cough syrup; the Benadryl in it would help her sleep. I went outside to bury what was on the sidewalk.

The rain had stopped as quickly as it started. The clouds disappeared and the sky again filled with stars. I just looked and looked at the sky. "Why? Why did you do that?" I waited for an answer. I didn't know who or what I was talking to. I stood and shook my fist at God and curse at him. "Why? Why?"

No sound. Eerily quiet. I recalled an old professor I had in college. He quoted Gandhi all the time. "In prayer it is better to have a heart without words than words without a heart."

I dropped to my knees then looked at the sky. I squeezed the hot muddy Arkansas soil through my fists. I asked for forgiveness and I prayed.

****

Aliana had developed an infection. She spent most of the days and nights now lying on a mattress in the milk house. I comforted her as best I could. Sometimes I'd sit by her side, and dab beads of sweat from her forehead with a cool wet towel. Her eyes would be closed, yet I could see them darted around under her eyelids.

Her body would chill and her skin would change to gooseflesh. She'd shiver for a few seconds as though she was riding in a car that plunged through a dip in the road filled with night air.

Other times, she'd call out Mary's name like a small child looking for her mother. Then she'd call out for me. A smile would fill her face as though she held a splinter of time caught in a drop of amber.

Aliana grew weaker as the hours became days. There was nothing I could do. Hospitals and doctors were nothing but footnotes in history. A history no one will ever read.

I had a plan. I knew Jessy had some Oxycontin for his cancer pain. Mary and Jessy were only five miles down the road. My old Allis Chambers tractor could make the trip and back in forty minutes—an hour at most.

Aliana was half asleep. "I'm going to get you something for the pain. I'll be back as soon as I can."

"You're coming back?"

I squeezed her fingers. "I'll be back. I'm going to Mary's house. Jessy might let me have some of his pain pills for you."

Aliana's face seemed to light up just a bit. I returned her smile and walked over to the hatch, pushed it open, then gently lowered it down when I was outside.

In the barn, I coaxed my old tractor to life. Computers were science fiction when this old girl was assembled. She didn't care about any CMEs. I figured this might be a one-time trip, the temperature each night were steadily increasing. It was well past eleven already and yet the air temperature was over one hundred degrees.

I hopped up on the tractor and headed to the road. I stopped for a few seconds. I wondered if someone else might be out, looking for food, water. I should have given Aliana my gun just in case. I tossed that idea out as quickly as it came. Aliana could hardly hold her head up yet alone a gun. I pulled out of my drive, turned my single headlight off and drove down the road in the darkness.

The majestic old maple trees that once lined the sides of the road were dead. Their leaves long gone and scattered by the winds, leaving ghostly remains that appeared to lean over the road. The nude branches stared down as though they'd try to swat me from my seat. They scared the shit out of me. I nudged the hand throttle up two more clicks. The tractor belched out a puff of diesel smoke in displeasure. I rambled down the road at ten miles per hour.

I came upon mummified remains of rabbits, deer, and cattle lying where they fell—untouched. There were no scavengers to eat the flesh of the fallen.

I pulled into Jessy's farm. I noticed his white Cadillac still sitting in the drive. I figured they'd made a run for it, going to Mary's sister's place in Oregon. I shut the tractor down and listened. I listened for anything—but heard nothing.

I walked tentatively up the sidewalk, the wooden porch creaked under my footfalls, and then with utmost caution I twisted the doorknob. The door opened, the hinges moaned out in despair. I stepped into their house.

I've been in their home on many occasions, and Mary's immaculate house keeping seemed to be nothing but a memory. Her curio cabinets had fallen over, spewing their precious contents on to the floor. Oddly, the heavy curtains that Mary was so proud of were gone.

It looked as though Jessy tried in vain to cover the windows. Bits and pieces of scrap wood planking had been nailed haphazard across the windows in their living room. I pulled a flashlight from my pocket, the beam of light cut through the dust that hung heavy in the room.

I heard a sound! I stopped in my tracks. I switched the flashlight off. I heard it again. Something. I didn't know what. I froze. Was I alone? Was someone else rooting through the house? I didn't move. My heart pounded in my chest. I felt the hairs on my arms stand up. My head turned side-to-side trying to determine the direction of the sound. The hallway; it was coming from the hallway. I moved slowly toward the sound. It started out low, and then it began to grow. My ears heard a melody. I pushed myself up against the wall and with the butt end of my flashlight I pushed the bedroom door open. The sound was louder. I peeked in.

In the moon lit shadows I saw Mary laying on the bed, humming more than singing, while she slowly sewed herself into a cocoon of fabric wrapped around her body. Mary was making her own death shroud out of her living room curtains. She had sewed herself in all way up to her chest.

I reached out and stopped her fingers. "Mary, what are you doing?"

"Walter, is that you?"

"Yes, Mary I'm here. Walter"

I turned on my flashlight. She didn't flinch. I shined the light directly into her face. "Oh damn, Mary."

Apparently, Jessy and Mary spent too much time out in the sunlight. Ultraviolet rays formed thick white cataracts that covered her eyes. She was nearly blind. Blisters pocked her face and covered her hands. The cataracts unsettled me, so I switched the flashlight off. The room filled with moonlight.

"Are you in pain?" I asked.

"No..."

"Where's Jessy?"

"He's sleeping. The white angels came and took him. He's sleeping."

I shinned my flashlight around the room for a few seconds. There lying next to Mary was Jessy. Mary had sewn her husband into a pair of curtains, just like she planned to do to herself.

"The white angels?" I asked.

"Oh yes, they came the other day. Or, maybe it was two days ago. I forget. They came down from the sky. Jessy is sleeping now."

I pulled Mary's hands from her work. "I think you're done an excellent job. There's no need to finish it."

"But the angels...will they find me? They came from the sky. Jessy is sleeping now."

What little sanity Mary had was slipping away. That damn unrelenting heat was slowly cooking her mind. "Why didn't you two come over to our house?"

"Jessy said it would pass. We couldn't get the car started. He's sleeping now. The white angels came."

I squeezed her fingers as gently as I could.

"We tried to keep the light out, but Jessy got sick. The white angels came."

"Ah Mary..." I pushed her hands down and pulled the needle from her fingers. "Do you need anything?"

"I don't suppose you have a sip, maybe two, of some water?"

"Let me see what I can do."

Knowing that Jessy and Mary had more than likely ran out of water sometime ago. I ransacked the kitchen and found nothing. Then it dawned on me. The water heater!

Their water heater was located in the root cellar. I crossed my fingers and turned the drain valve. A gush of water flooded my hand. Jessy apparently had forgotten about the eighty gallons of water just below his feet. Before I left the cellar, I spied a pint of what appeared to be peaches sitting all alone on a rickety wooden shelf. My hand hovered over the Ball jar as if to see if it was nothing more than a mirage. I snatched up the prize. I found several empty water bottles in the kitchen and filled them all.

When I returned to the bedroom, Mary was softly singing again. "I have some water for you."

"Ooh! Thank you, Walter."

I poured some of the priceless liquid into a small plastic cup and raised it to her lips. "Easy. Easy, not too fast. There's plenty for you." Mary gulped and slurped the water down. Small streams of water leaked out at the corners of her mouth and meandered down her cheeks.

"Here, I have a treat for you." I opened the jar and plucked out a peach with a fork.

For the next half hour I fed Mary the last meal she would ever have. She even drank the juice from the jar. I gave her another cup full of water.

"Mary, do you think Jessy would let me borrow a few of his pills?"

"Oh my I can't see why not. He's sleeping, so don't wake him."

"I won't. I promise. Do you know where he keeps his pills?"

"I don't see why not, especially if you promise to replace them. Did you look in the bathroom?"

Mary's mind clung onto reality by just spider threads. My flashlight lit up the room and I climbed over baskets of clothing they tried to stuff into the cracks of the makeshift shields over the window. In the bathroom, I quickly found what I was looking for. I returned to Mary's side.

"Mary, I'm going to go now. Aliana is sick and she needs my help."

"Will the white angels come for me, too?"

The shadow of death had fallen on her face. I figured Mary had a few hours to live. If she made it through the night, she certainly would be gone by morning.

"Yes, the angels will come for you tomorrow. That I know," I said softly.

She searched for her needle and thread. I stopped her hands. "You don't need to finish, Mary. The angels know you're here. Jessy told them. He told them he'd wait on you. He said you didn't need to finish sewing. He's sleeping now and you don't want to wake him."

A weak smile formed on her cracked lips. I offered her a few more sips of water then stuck two bottles beside her arms. I held her hand.

"Will I see Jesus?"

I moved a few strands of her long brown hair out from her eyes. "That I can guarantee."

"I won't know what to say."

I thought for a few seconds. "Why don't you sing for him? I'm sure he'd like that."

I kissed her forehead and stood quietly. I stared down at the woman who befriended Aliana and I when we first moved into our farm. Her mind was almost gone.

"Why don't you take a nap now? Just close your eyes and go to sleep like Jessy."

"The white angels took him away. He's sleeping now."

"I know." I placed a second kiss on her forehead then turned and walked out of the room. I closed the door. I rummaged through the house, looking for anything that would be of use for Aliana and myself. I took books, magazines and whatever else I could find.

Just as I pushed the front door open, I heard the haunting sound of Mary singing Amazing Grace. I stopped and I wept.

********

It's been over a week since my trip to Mary's house. The artesian spring had dried up, so we lost the ability to keep the milk house cool. Although we're still fifteen feet below ground, the temperature inside was increasing. During the day, the outside air reached one hundred forty degrees. We were slowly being baked to death. We were down to our last ten gallons of water. And I was out of solutions.

"Walter?"

"Aliana, try to sleep." Aliana was quickly slipping away. Infection tore through her body. I'd trade my soul to the devil for a bottle of penicillin.

"We're not going to make it are we? You knew didn't you? And yet you still kept trying."

I took her hand and squeezed it gently. "Yes, I knew." She smiled back.

"I'd like to know, too..."

"Honey," I began, "the sun. It's dying. I don't—nobody knows—why. It's growing bigger and soon it will fill the entire horizon. The oceans will boil away along with our atmosphere. There's no hiding—there's no—"

"You knew all this time?"

"Yeah, but you know what you said about arguing with an engineer."

I sat beside Aliana and steadied her head on my lap. I wiped her forehead with a damp cloth. "I hate to lose."

"We would have been great parents," Aliana said, her voice wavering.

I looked into her eyes. I knew that even false memories were better than no memories. So, I decided to give her some.

"We were great parents," I said.

With a touch as soft as an eyelash's brush against skin, I moved my thumb across her lips. The brilliant love of life that always glowed in Aliana's eyes, I could no longer see.

"We were?" Aliana asked.

"Remember our first born?" I began, "Matthew Benjamin Meir. Oh, almost forgot. Matthew Benjamin Meir, PhD. He studied under Michio Kaku, and then graduated from MIT. There's talk he'll be nominated for the Nobel Prize in physics.

"You used to enjoy the drive to Vermont in the fall. You'd spoil our grandchildren. We'd walk along the old road and loose ourselves in the autumn foliage. Then we'd come back home to the farm 'cause you liked the winters here."

Aliana stared at the ceiling. Her focus was on her mind's eye. Taking the words I fed her and turning them into images—into memories.

"We have a daughter, too; Teresa Ana Meir, MD." She smiled back at me.

"Oh, lots of doctors in the family I see."

"I know a mother isn't supposed to have favorites, but our middle son, Andy... No doctor degree, no college. He stayed here on the farm. He spoke for the trees."

Aliana gave me one big smile and I grinned back. I pushed a few strands of her hair from her forehead with my thumb. Her breathing became labored and her body tightened in my arms.

I felt her fingers close on my hand. Her voice was as hushed as a child's whisper.

"Walter...I love you..."

Aliana pulled in half a lung full of air but nothing came back out.

"Aliana! No!"

Her eyes dimmed and I watched her soul die. "I love you..."

Tears tumbled from my eyes and splashed on her cheeks. I wiped them away with my fingers. I cradled her in my arms and slowly rocked back and forth. "You wait for me. You promised."

I don't know how long I held Aliana in my arms. Perhaps it was days, or maybe a few hours. It didn't matter anymore. Time—a human invention—simply stopped for us all.

I used the last of the water to wash her body. I dressed her in her favorite yellow dress, the one Mary made for her. The one she wore when she told me she was pregnant. The one dress she insisted on taking down into the shelter.