Surefoot 25: Cross Porpoises

She stared at them, before taking the ball and throwing it - in the opposite direction.

"Vulcans are either crap ball players or crap party animals," Hrelle noted.

"Why not both?" Crash suggested, swimming past them to retrieve the ball.

Elsewhere, Kit was studying the colour pattern and texture of another ball, though his attention also moved to the others in the group. "This is fascinating! I have not intentionally immersed myself in water since our swimming lessons at the Academy! It remains a strange but not unpleasant sensation!" He drew in towards a silent Rrori. "You remain troubled, Very Good Friend?"

The Caitian seemed to struggle to maintain a dour expression - before finally relaxing his face and posture, settling down in the water. "Quite the reverse, actually, Kit. There is something about being here, in the water, with Doctor Wheelie and all of you, that is very relaxing. Relaxing and stimulating. But... he hasn't said or done anything. Is it really just being in the water, playing?"

Wheelie swam up to them. "No. It's part of the Harmonisation."

"Excuse me, Doctor?"

"I've been listening to your minds, and helping you and each other repair the trauma you've experienced, while you play."

Rrori frowned. "I know I signed the consent form for telepathic activity, but I was expecting something more... obvious."

"Delphine telepathy does not involve intrusion," Wheelie informed him. "It's a collective ability among consenting parties, with the water as a transmitting medium and the fun and exercise as stimulus to entering a conducive state of mind.

In the past, our abilities used to cause my ancestors no small amount of tragedy - when one or a few of us were accidentally beached or caught in fishing nets, entire pods could end up in identical situations, caught up in the distress of the original p1arties - but we've learned to control it now, maintaining our individualities while still benefiting others."

He looked to Rrori. "You are all linked, though you cannot read each other's thoughts. You're feeling better, not just because you want to feel better, or because I want you to feel better, but because all of your friends want you to feel better. And you're helping them, too." He dipped his head under the water before rising again. "That's an impressive erection you're sporting now, by the way. For a Leggy, of course. I hope those trunks are sturdy enough."

Rrori and Kit watched him depart, before Kit peered down in the water in front of Rrori and said, "I believe he's correct, based on my prior observations."

In another part of the lagoon, Hrelle drew up to Sasha. "Hello, Runt of the Litter. How are you doing?"

She was staring out at the holographic horizon, as if trying to discern where the reality and illusion joined up. "Super. You?"

"Me? Apart from the nightmares, the guilt, the doubts, the worry over Kami and you and the rest, I'm peachy."

"Sorry."

"You don't have to apologise. I know Kami upset you with that outburst."

"Don't blame her. I shouldn't have taken Little Brother out without telling her first." She shrugged, a little too casually to be convincing. "Doesn't matter. Nothing matters."

She started to turn away, but he caught her by the arm, drawing her back and getting her full attention. "Everything matters, Sasha. Everything. And everyone. You especially."

She looked up at him, letting him see all the emotions she kept locked away, just behind her eyes. "I know."

He pulled her into a hug, where she suddenly grabbed him back tightly, fiercely, before finally pulling back and swimming away. Then he returned to his wife and son, dipping under the water as he approached, before rising and squirting water from his mouth like a fountain statue at a delighted Misha.

Kami chuckled. "Enjoying yourself?"

He smiled at her. "Yes, actually, despite the reasons for our being here."

"I never pictured my husband as such an accomplished swimmer."

He cupped the warm water in his hands and poured it over Misha, smiling as the infant tried to shake the water from his fur. "I'm from fisherfolk stock, though the waters of the Archipelago are far too cold for swimming for long, not without risking freezing things off."

"And how's Sasha doing?"

"Holding on. But she's not herself."

"She took a life, Esek. And nearly died herself doing so. She won't be the girl you knew before. No one could be the same after that. But she'll pull through. You all will."

He looked to her. "'We all'?"

Kami smirked. "Who's the Counselor here?"

Suddenly Hrelle yelped as something fast and hard prodded his rear, and he turned to see Wheelie lift his head up out of the water and respond, "Oh, that'll be me."

Hrelle looked to him. "I hope that was your nose I felt back there!"

"You'll never know, Big Boy," the Delphine cackled, twisting and squirting water from his blowhole at the Caitian, making Misha laugh and clap his stubby hands. Then Wheelie called out, "That's it, Leggies, everyone in, gather round these rocks! I've learned enough!"

As the group gathered, settling down in a semi-circle on the holographic rocks shaped intentionally into comfortable seating arrangements, Wheelie drew back, regarding each of them. "Thank you all for your participation, and cooperation. Your minds opened up as easily as parting waves, letting me listen in-"

"You have not," T'Varik denied calmly, sitting at the far end beside C'Rash.

Wheelie looked to her. "Pardon?"

"You have made no telepathic contact. At least, not with me."

"No?"

"No. I would be aware of it. I am Vulcan."

"You are? I never knew!"

T'Varik ignored the chuckles from some of the others. "I have mental disciplines, defences. These alert me to the presence of another mind in contact with my own."

The Delphine drew up to her. "When you were ten, your parents took you to the Federation colony on Alpha III. There, a colleague of your father's who was minding you gave you some mint chocolate chip ice cream, in a dust-brown ceramic bowl with a tarnished, heavily-engraved silver spoon. It was your first ice cream. And it was the most amazing thing you had ever tasted. And since then, you have craved it. But you have always denied yourself such a shameless sensual treat."

T'Varik forced herself to control her obvious reaction to the revelation. "I... fail to understand how you could know that. No one else was aware."

"There are many forms of psionic ability in the Universe, T'Varik, and they don't all follow the same rules." He drew closer. "Of more importance is why you deny yourself such a simple pleasure. Or rather, the emotions it elicits." As the Vulcan glanced at the others, he added, "Everything that's said in this pool stays in this pool. And you've been through too much with this family of yours to be shy now."

T'Varik shifted, before drawing herself up into a more formal posture. "Vulcans must deny themselves the indulgence of emotions, as the unchecked release of-"

"I know, I know, your society would collapse, Armageddon would come, the dead rising from their graves, Vulcan sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, yadda yadda. So why not go the whole hog and have everyone submit themselves to the discipline of Kohlinar, to purge all emotions permanently?"

The Vulcan frowned. "Kohlinar is a particularly strenuous discipline, one that few can successfully achieve."

"Maybe. Or maybe... they don't want to let go of their emotions? Sure, keep them under control. But not to the point of denying themselves fully. There's no harm in a little indulgence."

Her expression tightened. "I disagree. And I was proven correct when I used excessive force against an entity who threatened someone I..." Her voice trailed away.

"Someone you love?" he prompted gently.

"Yes," she finally admitted. "I temporarily lost control. I cannot be trusted to manage these emotions responsibly. Therefore, the logical course of action is to-"

"-Is to exercise them more."

"No."

"Yes. When Misha begins to walk, he will stumble, and he will fall, because those muscles he will be exercising will still be new to him. And if - when - he does fall, and bruises himself and cries, will you recommend to him that he gives up continuing to try and walk?"

"Of course not. But that is-"

"No. Because he will have family around him to help and encourage him. And because though there may be risks involved, the rewards will outweigh the risks. For him, and for you."

T'Varik swallowed. "Vulcans are different-"

"I know, I have Counseled over thirty-six of them, young and old, married and single, in Starfleet and out of it. And the problems tend to remain the same. As do the solutions."

C'Rash slipped an arm around her. "Sounds logical to me."

T'Varik raised an eyebrow. "You are hardly a font of wisdom regarding logic." But then she looked at the Hrelles. "You should be aware that, because of my emotional bias, I may not be the optimal Lressha for Misha. You may wish to reconsider allowing me to continue in that role."

Hrelle and Kami looked to each other, Hrelle responding with, "Let me get this straight: you want us to consider replacing you as our son's godmother because you love him too much?"

T'Varik shifted. "I of course would not put it in such simplistic terms-"

"Kiss our furry ass!" the couple said in unison, laughing.

"I... see."

Wheelie cackled and looked to C'Rash. "She's a riot, isn't she? No wonder she gets you purring." He drew closer to the Caitian, his beady black eyes fixed on her. "Captain Myrick would be proud of you."

C'Rash started at the mention of the name of her former, first commanding officer. "He- How-"

"I know how difficult some of your actions during this crisis were for you. But they were the right ones; everyone here thinks so, and so do I. You handled yourself with distinction. Captain Hrelle is immensely honoured to have you as part of his crew. He doesn't think you'll be needing the Naughty Step again."

She grunted. "We'll see about that."

"And in return, you've had a glimpse of what he has gone through, what he has felt and done. You realise that the circumstances weren't as plain and obvious as you first thought. You understand each other better." Then he leaned in and added, "Keep at him about that weight, though. I'm amazed any of the fish in the bucket got here untouched."

Hrelle frowned as Kami laughed, Misha joining in without knowing why.

Then Wheelie sided over to Kit and Rrori, looking to the Caitian first, his voice sympathetic. "You are not an animal. Animals do not think twice about killing. I have Counseled many who have had to employ lethal force against opponents. They have all experienced guilt, trauma, fear, despite the circumstances behind the actions they took. This is common, and indicative of most sentient beings. Regardless of what triggered you, the fact that it troubles you so is more illustrative of your nature than the actions you took."

Wheelie drew closer. "And Izzy is right. You're much more appealing when you're not putting on an act. And I think that if you just be yourself, vulnerabilities and all, your next encounter will be more satisfying. For both of you."

Rrori shifted, glancing around the people watching him. "Um, yes, okay, thanks."

The Delphine cackled again. "Don't stand up for a while, you might poke somebody's eye out with that thing." Then he turned to Kit. "You have a very special mind, my young friend. Uniquely structured. It was a pleasure to listen to your thoughts."

Kit flushed. "Thank you, Most Respected Guest Counselor."

Then Wheelie's voice grew more serious. "You should have been telling people about the intensity of your own nightmares, however. The way it's left you feeling is alarming."

"Kit," Kami asked, looking concerned. "What have you been keeping to yourself?"

The Qarari looked to her. "My friends have undergone far greater trauma than I experienced."

Wheelie nudged him. "It's not a contest, Cadet! You're entitled to your pain! Especially as it's triggered by more than the Vlathi assault."

Sasha, sitting near her family, looked to him. "What does he mean, Kit?"

Kit glanced down at the undulating water, his mottled green skin flushing. "I... have been managing a journal of my experiences on my homeworld, when my government treated me as an Aberrant for wanting to change my gender."

"That's therapeutic," Kami noted, smiling. "Good."

He nodded. "And I have been secretly transmitting them back to Qarar for publishing in a political datapage."

Hrelle had been smiling, too, but now it dropped. "Not so good."

Sasha looked to him. "Why? What's wrong with that?"

"Starfleet Regulations expressly forbid engaging in political activity," T'Varik informed her. "Particularly with political activity on a non-aligned world. It is a court-martial offence."

Kit turned to the First Officer. "I do not name myself, Most Respected Commander, nor make any connection to Starfleet. I use private communication channels, and do not advocate any political change. I simply let my story speak for itself. Many have responded favourably to Heywood's story."

"Heywood?" Jonas asked, bemused.

Kit nodded. "My pseudonym: Heywood Jablome." As Hrelle, C'Rash and some of the cadets laughed, Kit turned to T'Varik to explain, "It is a gag name, Most Respected Commander, a play on the phrase 'Hey, Would You-"

"I get it, Cadet," the Vulcan informed him. "Very droll. This remains a potentially serious offence, however."

Wheelie looked to her. "Fortunately, the Confidentiality Agreement you signed when you agreed to this Session saves you from the burden of having to deal with it. Doesn't it?"

T'Varik straightened up, saying nothing further and ignoring C'Rash nudging her teasingly.

Wheelie chuckled, but then looked back at Kit. "As for you, 'Heywood': stop acting like you can't confide in your friends! And stop self-medicating, too, while you're at it; you're not a doctor."

"What?" Hrelle barked, "Kit! What have you been doing?"

Kit flushed a dark green. "It is nothing, Most Respected Captain, a minor issue-"

"If it is minor, then why didn't you confide in your friends?"

Kit started to reply, but then looked away.

"You have been in my medical kit," Eydiir declared bluntly. "I am disappointed."

"Forgive me, Very Good Friend Eydiir, Most Respected Senior Officers, Very Good Friends. It will not happen again."

"It better not!" Neraxis pointed a finger at him. "Because if it does, I'll stick your head up your bony green ass, you hear me?"

"Loud and Clear, Very Good Friend Neraxis."

Wheelie chuckled as he moved to the Bolian and Jonas, staring up at her. "I got a good feeling about you. You should be feeling the same way about yourself. When things got to High Tide, you kept your cool and did your job. You didn't like much of what you had to do, but you did it. And as a result, people's lives were saved, your ship was saved."

He leaned in. "It wasn't your fault Jonas was shot. It wasn't your fault others were hurt. Worse would have happened without your help. I've eased your nightmares. You might still get them from time to time, but you won't be overwhelmed by them. You're going to make an awesome Chief of Security someday. And maybe even Captain. Your own Captain thinks so."

Neraxis flushed a dark purple as she looked to Hrelle, who nodded and gave her a thumbs up. Beaming, she looked back at Wheelie. "Thanks!"

"No problem; we blue-skinned types have to stick together." Then he looked to Jonas. "You're a rather versatile individual, aren't you?"

Jonas blinked. "Pardon?"

"You're many things to many people, and yourself: man, son, friend, lover, cadet, Strategic Engineering Officer, crewman." He moved up, until he was almost on Jonas' lap. "But you can't be everything. You know what you're not?

You're not a killer."

He blinked again, his expression tightening. "No- You don't- You don't-"

"I don't understand? I've listened to your thoughts. And I've listened to the thoughts of actual killers. And let me tell you, there's a Galaxy-wide difference between the two. Yes, you've killed. But that does not make you a killer. You are a decent, compassionate, loving individual. You only did what you had to do to save others. You have nothing to fear."

Jonas seemed to take that in, leaning against Neraxis and nodding. "Thank you."

"My pleasure!" He splashed over to Sasha and Eydiir next, nudging the Capellan. "You don't need much help from me. But can I tell you something about yourself anyway? Something you might not know? Can I give you that, at least?"

Eydiir nodded. "Of course."

"You're an idiot."

She started to reply, frowning at Sasha smirking. "I... wasn't expecting that."

"I'm sure you weren't. You're brave and strong and compassionate and generous and a perfect friend. But you're still an idiot. Do you really think Falok would reject you if he mindmelded and saw the memories of you killing? Are you really afraid that he will only see that, and forget about all the other wonderful things about you? It won't happen. If he's as smart as every other Vulcan I've known, he'll see your darkest part and still think the sun shines out of your ass. Proverbial ass, that is."

Eydiir grunted, but said nothing.

"You Capellans." Wheelie joked. "You're all so emotional." Then he moved onto Sasha. "Can I have a hug, please?"

Sasha started, not expecting the request, before finally nodding and leaning in, wrapping her arms around the Delphine head, her hands moving over its smooth wet skin.

When he drew back, he slapped his fins on the surface of the water. "I've wanted to do that ever since I listened in on your mind! Now I've got something to tell my calf when I see him tonight!"

She frowned, feeling a little embarrassed without knowing why. "What are you talking about?"

He looked at her again. "By the Dawn... do you know how amazing you are? The things you've done, the lives you've saved? The bravery you've shown, the acts you've achieved? And you're only just starting out! What will you do in the next ten, twenty, fifty years? You're a hero. You get the job done."

She was blushing now. "Shut up."

"No. I won't. Everyone here thinks so. You've earned it. You've earned so much." He drew up to her again, his voice dropping to a more serious, more intimate voice. "You've earned the right to be scared. You've earned the right to have doubts. You've earned the right to be angry. All of these are perfectly normal responses to being challenged, the way you've been challenged. They're just reminders that you are alive, and that you are stronger than whatever tried to hurt you.

And when the High Tide comes again and the next challenge washes over you, you'll put aside your fears, your doubts, your anger, you'll roll up your proverbial sleeves and you'll get the job done again."

Sasha was crying now, though she quickly wiped her face and warned him, "You'd better be right."

He dipped his elongated snout under the surface of the water and splashed her. "Of course I'm right! I'm as smart as I'm sexy!"

Then he swam over to Hrelle, Kami and Misha, bypassing the latter two to focus on the Captain. "Well, Big Boy, I'm not sure why you're here. You have one of the most resilient minds I've ever listened to. And you've taken your darkest half, put a leash and collar on it and you make it work for you, and still manage to act like you want to be the Universe's Dad. You really want to make up for growing up with a shitty father. Don't you?"