Surviving Retirement

When I turned to the table, Cindi and Megan were both looking at me with strange looks. "You didn't tell us that you worked for JoEllen; all of the girls at school buy stuff from them." I blushed and didn't answer. But Rachael did.

She actually said, "Girls, Joe is the Jo and his wife is the Ellen. They founded and owned the company until they sold it late last year." Now both Cindi and Megan looked very confused.

I looked at them and said, "Hey, look at it this way. When we were your age, we started off just like you are now. Fifteen years later, we were successful just like you will be too. Now, don't you have to do something with your hair or something?"

Rachael's eyes lit up. "Come on, girls. I want to tell her some things to do. And we will get your nails done too." Neither girl could say anything; they just got up and followed Rachael out the door to the hair salon.

I poured another cup of coffee and waited for Rachael to return knowing that she would. When she came back, we started talking and, she made me feel both bad and good at the same time. She asked if they could get a room for tonight. They were going to stay over and then leave early in the morning. I told her that the hotel was fairly full, but that they could use my room and I would sleep in the camper. She grinned and asked if I was serious because she figured that I was sleeping with one or both of the girls. I turned red.

She saw that and put her hand on mine and said, "Joe, don't worry so much. I didn't tell you on the phone, but I talked to Ellen two weeks ago for a long time and she told me what you were doing. She also told me about your arrangement about sex with others. She feels sure that you will be sleeping with someone regularly on this journey. The other thing is that the girls just told me about how you helped them when they were in trouble and how much being around you had boosted their confidence. This is the first time either of them has done something like this. You are doing for them exactly what you did for Ellen. Don't be embarrassed about that. All of us need a partner like you to help us through our vulnerable periods. Just treat them like you treated me and Melinda and all of the other people you care about. Ellen understands and so do I. They are here to help you too, you know."

I started to ask and she answered before I could finish, "She is fine and that is all I will tell you and all I will tell her if I talk to her again. Both of you need this time for yourselves. Don't worry about her. Now you be fine."

If the girls were excited by the hairdos and nails, they went ballistic when we took the hanging bags and boxes to my room which was next to theirs. Rachael peeked and handed one hanging bag to Megan and one to Cindi. Their eyes got huge and then Megan went in to my bathroom and Cindi went into their bedroom. Rachael and I just looked at each other and smiled.

A moment later, Megan came out very carefully. "Is this for me?"

Rachael took over. "Of course it is and it is perfect on you. Come over here and let me check. Neither Rachael nor I looked at them as friends or lovers at that moment; we looked at models critically to see if the fit was right and that it hung properly. We were checking Megan when Cindi came in wearing the same look on her face. Rachael turned her attention to Cindi and gave her the same inspection. Then we had them stand next to each other.

The dresses were almost identical except for the color and one other element. They were snug fitting sheaths with an asymmetrical hem line. On the short side, there was a split up the side to their mid thigh. The top was just suggestive with a single strap over one shoulder. The difference was that they were mirror images of each other. Cindi's shoulder strap went over her left shoulder while Megan's went over her right. Cindi noticed and asked about it.

Rachael told her that since she wore her guitar strap over her right shoulder, she needed to be the reverse. The truth was that the mirror image worked perfectly. The other difference was that Megan's were both light and Cindi's were darker for contrast with their hair. Finally she brought out the shoes. They were a neutral skin tone with open toes and heels. I had guessed at their sizes and had gotten close, but it didn't matter with the open style. Cindi, being shorter, had three inch heels while Megan had one inch heels. When dressed, they looked like a team and a very beautiful one. I felt for sure that the dresses would enhance their already great singing. The only question I had was if they would be comfortable singing in them. They got the look on their face that said "Puleese."

They were fantastic that night. Every song was perfect and delivered with even more passion. The audience loved them and showed it. There were two unexpected highlights. The first came in the middle of their set. A drunk in the audience called out to do Willie Nelson. I was about to go pull him out, but Cindi and Megan just looked at each other and shrugged. Cindi sat in the chair and began the simple guitar introduction. I had never heard a woman sing "Blue Eyes Crying in the Rain" before, but now I have and it was haunting in a different way than Willie's version. They got a standing ovation for that.

The other came just before the finale. Cindi came to the mike and said, "We are going to try something that we have never done before. It is a change of pace and style for us, so please be gentle. This is for a special person and he will know that it is for him. Then she sat down and Megan began singing "Un bel di." Even the pianist provided by the hotel was caught off guard. All he could do was listen as I did. When she finished, she just stood there looking a little shy as the audience did not respond until they erupted again and gave her their second standing ovation. Cindi waited until the applause began to subside and then she stood next to Megan as they sang "It is time to say good night." And the show was over.

I sold thirty copies of their cd that night and they were higher than a kite when we went to their room afterwards. Randall and Rachael had raved to them over their work, but said that they needed to get to bed because they had to leave early in the morning. When they said good night to me, Rachael said, "Check your e-mail in the morning." We shared a bottle of wine in Cindi and Megan's room after they took their dresses off. I made love to both of them when they had begun to calm down. That was a first for me too. As I fell asleep I remembered something that Rachael had said that I should to do for them what I did for Ellen. I realized that every time Ellen did something exciting, we always made love afterwards. That is what I had done tonight for Cindi and Megan.

I read this over and sent it. The next morning, I checked my e-mail and there was one from Rachael telling me how great the evening had been for both Randall and her. She told me to stay in touch. Attached were a dozen photographs of the girls performing in their new dresses. I could tell that she had hired a photographer to record the evening.

The next two days became a very hectic for us. The word spread and Saturday night, the club was full to overflowing. People were standing outside to listen. We sold all of the cds we had left. On Sunday, the crowds got even bigger. All I could do was take names and addresses and tell them that we would have one sent to them as soon as we got another shipment.

June 13, Week 7, Still on the road in Washington

Sorry about not sending a report last week. The past two weeks have been a blur. After that great weekend, the hotel wanted them to stay over, but we were already committed for the next week. I guess that there was a big row between the local people and corporate. All we could do was prepare to move on since the girls had a contract to fulfill. But we also were out of cds. It turns out that the recording was made at their college and that a local company there had made the copies. When we called the company and ordered more, there was a problem. They had the vocals, but couldn't find the cover art for the case. The girls had the original photograph and art, but it was back at the college. We resolved that by ordering 300 cds with empty cases. Then we took one of the new photographs that Rachael had sent and had a local artist where we were recreate the cover from my copy of the cd except with the new photograph.

You might want to keep the cd I sent you because if they get famous, that cover might become collectable. There were only 100 of those made. In any event, we had 500 of the new ones printed up and I also had another 500 printed as 8x10 prints. We had gotten a couple of requests for an autographed picture and didn't have anything. The girls thought I was crazy but since I paid for them, they accepted them. This also meant that when we got the cds, we had to spend a full day folding and inserting the new cover in the cases.

The hassle between the hotel and corporate was resolved with the understanding that we would do our next stop as planned, but that we would come back on the last weekend of the tour and play for four nights. The girls would also be getting a nice bonus. As we drove to our next place, we stopped at a flea market and looked around. I found a perfect wire ice cream table and two chairs that would work better for their set than the ones from the bar. The girls again squawked when I bought them, but I knew that they would add just a touch more of the quality we had been building. We also bought a vintage wine bottle and glasses along with an appropriate candle holder to complete the table.

Now we were getting crowded in the camper with the new clothes and set pieces. I also wanted to explore another option to enhance their show, but I haven't mentioned it to them. I looked around and bought a small covered trailer that would carry most of the show things and that would be easy to tow. By now the girls quit squawking and just let me do what I wanted. They said that I was playing with boy toys.

When we got to our next place, their reputation had preceded them. We did our first show in the club, but for the next two, they opened up a wall to another room which would hold almost double the crowd of the club. The expanded room was full for both the Saturday and Sunday shows. The girls were on a huge high after each show, but I could also tell that they were beginning to show the stress and strain of the tour. When we finished, we had a three day break; so I scheduled us to stop at a town that had a great spa and treated them to a day of being pampered and spoiled. That night they fell asleep quickly and slept soundly. They said that the day had relaxed them so much that it almost exhausted them.

While they were enjoying the day, I went to a professional music store and told their light man what I wanted to do and he laid out a perfect set up for us. There was a black post that held an overhead light that could be modulated to cast a wide but dim light over the singing area. Then there were two front lights that could be independently controlled to cast a full light on each girl as they sang. I could control the lighting from a small console on the side. The set up and tear down for everything would take less than an hour. I bought it and took it with me. We tried it out their first night and both girls had no problem adjusting to the change. The Saturday and Sunday audiences loved it even if they weren't aware of the change.

So now, we are on the home stretch. We have two shows this week and then the last four at the biggest hotel on the tour. I have been trying to figure out what to do next. The only thing I know for sure is that I want to take a break from driving. This has been great, but I need to stay in one place for awhile and do something.

I was really starting to feel that too. I had always had a place and some stability in my life, but I had just been a transient hobo for the past two months. I wasn't sure where or what, but I knew that I needed to settle for a while. For now, I have decided to take the girls back to school and see what that area had to offer. If I like it, I would stay there. If not, I will look around some more. I was enjoying being with Cindi and Megan both personally and professionally. They were each very talented and also fun to be with. I also enjoyed having sex with them. We usually made love after a performance run ended and then just enjoyed each other during the drive and set up for the next gig. I was also beginning to see a different tension especially in Cindi. It wasn't about us or what we were doing. That came to a head when we arrived for our next shows.

June 27, Week 9, Still on the road in Washington

I didn't write last week because I didn't really have anything to say. We did our last two shows and drove here for the last weekend. They were already expecting big crowds and have added tables and opened up the adjacent room for us. We arrived the day before opening and were asked to have dinner with one of the executives that night.

It turned out that they were extremely pleased with our entire tour. They knew that the girls would be in school for the next year, but offered them several special gigs during the school year. They wanted a three night show over Labor Day in a town about 100 miles from the college. Then they wanted a three day show at another nearby place for Halloween. Each of these would earn the girls $2000 each. Then they asked for a four day gig over Thanksgiving weekend at an unspecified location for $5000 each. Finally, they wanted them to do a two show special on New Year's Eve. For this, they would make $7500 each. In short, they each could make almost $15,000 by the start of the NewYear plus the cd sales.

Without saying anything or asking any questions, Cindi said 'yes.' Megan gave the response I expected which was that she wanted to do it, but needed to talk to her family first. I could tell now that Cindi was having problems with her family and she needed this to avoid the usual family holiday stress. After dinner, Cindi went up to their room, but I asked Megan to have a drink with me first.

That was when Megan told me about Cindi's real situation. Her mother had left her father during her freshman year. She was closer to her father than to her mother and she tried to be consoling him long distance. He seemed to be ok during that year but the next year, he began drinking. At first, it wasn't too bad, mainly on weekends. By the end of the year, he was drinking every night. His company had warned him during that summer to get help or his job was in jeopardy. He slowed up during the first part of last year but as the holidays neared, he got worse and was fired just after the first of the year.

Cindi had the rest of the year paid for, but he had to dip into her college fund to make the house payments. He went through that by May. They were already committed to this tour and she hoped that between this and getting another job, she could get through her last year. She was firmly committed to finishing her degree so that she could find and keep a job herself. The opportunity that they had just given her meant that she could make some money, but it also meant that she didn't have to spend the holidays taking care of her father.

The other thing was that her boyfriend was kind of a loser. He was nice enough, but wasn't ambitious at all. He hadn't even called her while they had been on tour. Megan's boyfriend had called her every other day, which I knew. Cindi had decided to end the relationship if he came back to school in the fall. Keeping busy seemed to be better than trying to let her feelings get hurt again. Megan then told me that she loved making love to me, but she didn't want to do it again. Her boy friend knew about our times together and accepted it, but she wanted to go back to see him ready for him. Instead, she suggested that I spend more time loving Cindi because she was feeling really alone and it scared her.

That scares me a little too. I mean Cindi is a wonderful person and easy to work with and be with. But to be part of her healing from her father and boy friend could mean that she would substitute me for them. I don't think that I want to be a father or a boy friend for her. I guess I can try to keep things as a friend with benefits until school starts. Then when she and her other friends are around, I can back away just be a supportive friend. Maybe? We'll see.

The last weekend was the best by far. With the new lights and props and knowing that it was the end of the tour, the girls just sold it. The audiences were excited and appreciative to everything they did. They added another country song, one of Patsy Cline's hits. Cindi did this one while Megan did another beautiful aria. After each show, I was selling cds like pancakes and they were busy autographing pictures and telling people that they weren't sure of their future schedule, but had them write down their e-mail and that we would notify them when things were finalized. When we finally added things up, we found that we had sold over 200 of the cds and we only had about 100 of the pictures left. It had been a perfect ending to a perfect tour. That night, Megan slept in my room and I spent the night with Cindi for the first time alone. She put as much passion in bed as she had during the show. She actually tested the limits of my abilities as a man. We finally feel asleep at three in the morning.

We didn't wake up until 10:00 the next morning only to find Megan dressed and a suitcase packed. We were still in bed when she sat on the edge and said that she had talked to her parents and they wanted her to fly home for a couple of days. She was catching the shuttle bus to the airport and said that she would meet us at the campus on Wednesday. I estimated that it would take us two full days to get back to the school if we left that afternoon. That meant two nights on the road with Cindi, which didn't seem to be too bad. We gave Megan a kiss and she went downstairs to catch the shuttle. Cindi and I took a shower together and went down for breakfast.

While we ate, we talked alone for the first time when there wasn't some pressure on us. She told me about her father and her concerns about being able finish school. Even with the money she would make during the fall, she felt that she would have enough for tuition, but probably not enough to live off of unless she got a job. Although I hadn't firmly committed to what I was going to do next, I told her to not worry about because I was thinking about staying somewhere close to the college until at least the first of the year. She could stay with me if she needed to. She asked me if I was sure and I told her that I would rather have her with me than anyone else except maybe Megan and much better than being alone. We would have to find a place when we got back. She said that she knew of a couple of areas that had some houses for rent.

We spent a leisurely drive back to the school and enjoyed our time together by stopping at several places along the way. Without the pressure, I found that she really was a vulnerable woman. I saw sensitivity in the way she looked at things and talked about people we noticed. It wasn't naiveté or immaturity at all; it was just an awareness of the beauty of life and the importance of things. She helped me see some things like Ellen had always been able to. We actually got to the area of the college late Wednesday afternoon, but decided to stay at a park about thirty miles away for the night. Then we wouldn't have to rush in the morning to get into town. As we were grilling some fish for dinner, my cell phone rang and it said that it was Megan.