All Comments on 'Suspicions Third'

few mistakes but still good, thanx for writng a good ending.

this is how cheaters should be treated, specially who thinks they did nothing wrong, have some kind of weired explanation, and choosing lover over kids! wow, actually every cheater does so, every person do bad things, some even do commit crime, but cheaters are who , choose themselves over their family.

thnx again keep it up.

Seems to me to jump around and be quite jumbled. Difficult to follow the thread.

you think just like me, your first one was ditto, i would have done, and this one, you did not change any character, used original, and kept Kathy as stubborn as she was in original, and still you did great, and your last one, i will say one thing - i would marry a handicap than cheater/bitch, atleast i will live my life happily.

I liked the approach of having the son getting his revenge on his slut mother. When a woman leaves her family to take up with another man she is esentially saying that she has no feelings for her children. The son's actions allow others to see the mother and sister in a different light than was protrayed in others. Good story.

Dad was an idiot in the first story and a even biccer idiot in this foolish follow up.

was needed. The original two part story pretty well covered all the ground.

I really liked it. This is a much better ending than the way the original story was left.

I remember the original story a bit (sorry, read it a long time ago), and I also thought it was as if the wife simply got away with it.

Although this followup had Kathy's world turned upside down, with everybody knowing what a terrible person she really is, in the end, she STILL doesn't get it.

Kathy begs Paul (the person she hurt most by her cheating) for money to see her lover and son, AND wants to get back together with Paul, now that Karl wants nothing to do with her. She hasn't gotten the point at all. Even though she's pretty much destroyed herself, she STILL wants to eat her cake and have it. That ending ruined it a bit for me.

Kathy - Jason are you still angry with me?

Jason - Huh? what are you talking?

Kathy - I know what I did was wrong, I now realized it, I am very sorry..

Jason - Wait mom!, what are you sorry about?

Kathy - you know Jason, but i guess, you are still angry with me, I am desperate to relink with my son, you kow i always loved, eben though you think...

Jason - Mom, stop it, I am not angry with you anymore..

Kathy - What ! oh Jason you dont know how much.. (and she runs to hug him, but he stopped her with his hand)

Jason - wait mom , I said i not angry with you , but it does not mean, i want to do anything with you, I am quite happy with what i have, and i don't hate you anymore..

Kathy - hate me? Jason you hated me...

Jason - what do you expect from kids you abandoned

Kathy - Jason I never abandoned you, I was here, you father did not let me meet you as much i wanted

Jason - shut up! say one more word about my father and i will...

Kathy - you what? huh? Jason, you think your father was not responsible for it, even a little, people get divorce, split, kids deal with it , you should have dealt with, look i am really sorry for what i did but i am also a human, and human make mistakes...and i am paying for so long dont you think it enough

Jason - yes mom, human, makes mistake, and they pay for it, and you did too, and you are paying it too, and its not me, who is making you pay, i just don't want you in my life, honestly mom, i dont think of you very much now, you are just a woman who cheated on her husband, and when given choice between her kids and a lover, she chose lover. And mom, you are right , you made mistake, when you cheated, you made mistake, when you considered it, you made mistake, when dad asked you who you want to be with , you made mistake telling him, you wanted to be with your lover, but MOM, when you left us in real for your lover, when you made that DECISION , it was not MISTAKE, it was you telling world that you don't care about us or we come second to your lover.

And mom parents get divorce, kids do deal with it, but there is always a reason, they do it for their kids, but what you did, you left a happy family, for a...i dont know what to say, its like you are just moron.. who will never get it,..let me make it clear... years ago your TRUE love meant more to you than your love for us, and NOW, my dislike for you means much more to me, than your pretending, leftover love.

Kathy - jason, I am your mother...my mistake was to peruse my love i thought was my true love..and you hate me for that...

Jason - you will never get it, its not about perusing your true love, it was about abandoning us, for someone, choosing someone else over us, not even trying to fight, for us, making our father suffer for something he did nothing to deserve, wasting so many years of his life, and you call yourself mother? what did you do as mother, you are some one who gave birth to two kids, and left them with their father to take care. And you were not mother when we needed you , now we dnt need mother, you are the one who think we need you or you need us, we dont need mother, at this age MOTHER, if you need kids to be mother, find another true love and have them, but don't do it unless you are sure that you are over your first true love, otherwise you will create another Jason and Christy, but if you trust me, i think it is not into you, if you can get it, even after these years i dont think you will ever get it, life is not about creating babies with any love you find, in your life and then leaving them.

Kathy - JASON!

jason - Sorry mother, you made mistake, and paid for it, it took so long for you to realise it, if you really did, but it is too late for making amends, just leave it.

One of the frustrating things about some of these stories is that the kids are often left in the dark because the husband who has gotten crapped on doesn't let them know that their mother committed adulty and ended the marriage. In this story, the wife had nearly gotten a free pass until her own son held her to account. Good for him. It sounds like the wife still doesn't get it though even at the end of this version of the story.

Thanks for sharing your work with us.

Very creative and rather unique way of dealing with this story. Please help your readers a bit more to make sure we know whose POV is speaking--especially when that changes during a confrontation.

My only negative is my doubt that the son could have pulled off the elaborate con. He may have watched "The Sting," but how did he get all the pieces to fit together? Perhaps if you had given him a partner, possibly someone who was cheated on as well, it would have been more believable.

Overall, though, a good read.

This was pretty bad. Hardly worth the effort.

I thought this was a much better story/ending than the other ending to the original story. This way the husband gets his self respect back. I still think someone should write a fourth chapter where the stupid ex-wife talks to a shrink about the state of her mental health. Even in this story she still doesn't understand what she has done. As I understand it even swingers and people with open marriages don't love anyone more than their husband or wife and any sex they have is just sex not love or so these people say. Well done writer and good attempt at pretty bad original story.

already a very somber story in the first place and all you did was make it even a sadder one. now 3 kids have to carry the burden some adults should have.

did you get off on something like that? a very wierd imagination. tastes are for sure different I did not think of this peace in an erotic way.

Nice job! It's too bad that you did not have an epilogue where say after Karl jr, graduated from university, Karl Sr, receives a anonymous package with with photos and a explanation on how the everything was faked and set up. His reaction maybe? Just a thought.

The story itself is not that believable, but the crappy spelling and punctuation certainly is.

It underlines that the biggest victim is the children. Even so it reminds us that all actions lead to reaction and that revenge only leads to more revenge unless you follow the scorched earth line. Note, that in this new solution Karl Jr. is a new victim. It never ends.

she got what she deserve and to be clear it wasn't enough punishment for the nut case wife.the first writer should've make it clear that the wife was a tramp and punish her.

Good option, most authors seem to neglect the anger and potential revenge of the kids... I liked this ending.

Well done, even though I didn't read the previous story, I followed the story just fine. A good stand alone story.

I thought that the son getting even with his cheating slut of a mother was great, and causing her pain like the pain she caused his father was the best.

Thanks for the good read.

Nice twist too. Thanks for a good read.

Kids always get hurt in the divorce, and it was very clever to think about the teenage son getting revenge. Interesting read.

Nothing like getting it stuck in and broken off by the kids. The young man had seen his fathers constant struggle and it angered him. Thats realistic. I'll bet the uncle did get a chuckle out of it at some point. Don't they say that kids can be way more savage than adults? Good stuff.

Good read, The kid gets revenge. In some situations kids do have revenge fantasies just like adults. Needed more care in developing the story.

Thanks. Keep writing. You have the right stuff.

I liked that the son wanted his mother to feel the pain she had caused.

cpete,

I liked RHinSC' comment too, as well as many others....

Great twist on the original best yet on Ch 3 of others. Really Great!

Thanks for sharing on Lit. very much!

x

This was a great ending to a difficult story. A unique twist in that the son takes over the narrative, but I thought it was well put together. Great work.

simply brilliant :)

Where would I find parts1 and 2?

reply to: hangman@ezclick.net

Well done cpete. I liked this story a lot...that said, a couple of small peca dildos. Kathy was much smarter in the first story...here she is portrayed as pretty stupid with her myopic worry only about her second husband and child and/or her lack of a cogent defense with her children. After all she had a very responsible job with the Cable CO. Also, the time line is only explained in the prologue/introduction. One never got a specific sense of how old the two kids were...therefore it was tough to judge the maturity of both children. I reread the first story, but still...not nice to the reader. Nonetheless, a wonderfully clever story. Thank you cpete.

Liked the satire of this tale - and it fits well with "once a cheater, always a cheater". Now where is that idiot shoe-no-IQ to defend this skank?

and wrote one chapter, but everyone attacked me for trying, so kept it to myself, but i liked yours too, mine was not so many years after that, and type of move one story, i like where man fights, even the weakest man will fight when forced to, don't know why people take some people so lightly. Great story, keep writing, 5 from me.

good effort, better output.

because bad guys should not win! Thanks for writing it!!!

SleeplessinMD

Karl was a creep....married women are off limits.....let them get divorced if they have to sleep around...good job

You did a superb job. Your having Jason primarily and Cristi secondary control the discussion after Kathy entered the family's front door was rather original and fir in very well. I really like you writing. Only negative are grammar and re-structuring of a few sentences. Edit your text after you formulate it: or have a friend edit your stories.

one of the worst stories I've read. Unoriginal, not entertaining, and can't spell. Finically? Really?

You are a complete shit head, this was a very fitting tale. Cpete hit it dead on, Thanks for an outstanding tale.

In real life evil may get rewarded like the slut wife, but we read fiction to get above real life for awhile; a brief escape where good is rewarded and evil is punished. 1 star for Ch. 2, 5 stars for this ending.

Having the kid engineer the revenge was a nice twist.

Not even up to the one-handed typing standard.

your like the rest of us, atleast I tried. But your one of those jack asses.

Do you fetch and lick your balls ?? Maybe roll in shit?? I bet you do!

Loved it.

nice fucking story

Of the many written...I liked this one.

will never be beneficial to any one involved in this fiasco. TK U MLJ LV NV

You should fix all of Red1's stories, I'm sure she would appreciate it.

That is not the best way to tell this tale. Especially since it was kind of obvious from the beginning. But the revenge crowd needs to be fed.

Still the wife never did come down off Cloud 9.

the whole scheme by the teenage son was dumb

How do you get even with a cheater?

Do nothing. Your son will do it for you.

HA

this could be a stand alone story or an alternate ending, TK U MLJ LV NV

I figured out early what happened so it was a bit of labor to finish. Always, the words chosen by an author to describe events make or break a good story and so...I gave you a five.

I can't blame dad for being a man and stubborn and Kathy was too weak with an old boyfriend and she paid a high price. i gave her credit because she apparently did love the guy but good old Karl was the cheaters' cheater, if he really cared for her he would have attempted to verify facts - in person but no! Don't think Kathy was a slut, just a weak woman in love and lust.

Thanks!

I really liked this version, unlike the other follow ups which made me want to puke. 5 stars

he was smart enuff to teach his ex mom a lesson.

I can't find the writer whiteone redone

Your ending was certainly more satisfying. The original was pathetic. WR must really hate men. Sometimes I'm stunned by the misandry that infects this section of lit. But I guess we see it in advertising in tv and movies and especially family courts so I shouldn't be suprised to see it here.

A patrol officer is no detective and if you know cops, he would not likely go to that much trouble for a piece of shit sister/ sister in law.

According to a well respected theologist most people misunderstand forgiveness.

First must stop harming.

Second must make a sincere apology.

(and the victim gets to decide whether to believe or not)

Third must make every effort possible to make amends.

Only if all these conditions are met is forgiveness required.

But ruined it with the BS forgiveness crap. Fuck forgiveness! If I go out and Eat a live baby on national TV, and then look at my shoes and say sorry(blink blink), does that make it OK? Am I still forgiven if I keep doing it, and don't say sorry, like the bitch in this tale? "God" supposedly forgives all. Does that include the unrepentant? If yes, then why the fuck is Satan in Hell? If forgiveness is so great, then why do we put people in jail? Just ask for a murderer to apologise, forgive him, and let him go!

If all I own in this life is an empty sack, and someone`s forgiveness, I'll keep only the sack! At least an empty sack is worth SOMETHING! Forgiveness is ONLY good for making the forgiver feel good about themselves. Egotism? Pride? Selfish? Aren't these sins too?

Do the right thing by people, and forgiveness is unnecessary!

This was a bit predictable as regards to Jason. As soon as he opened his mouth, we all knew he was behind the whole thing. Still well written, as are all of cpete's stories, and thoroughly enjoyable too.

I have just one more question about Forgiveness. Why do we forgive all the small thing, which, by being small hardly require forgiveness, yet we still hold a grudge with the big stuff. Oh we say that we forgive the big stuff, but we still hold that grudge. "I may forgive you, but I won't fucking well eat at the same table as you!" Hypocrisy!

Now then, for true fans of sarcasm: Instead of debating my comment, and counterpointing it with logical argument and intelligent reason, as is the norm, I humbly request that all you Anonymous posters just bash my comment, ridicule my personal hygiene, question my intelligence and manhood, and make some brilliant observations about my sexual orientation! You know, just for a refreshing change!

that Kathy, in all her brain waves, went out and bought skates and a file, TK U MLJ LV NV

It's nice when kids actually understand who really cares for them.

It's so we can stop wasting our time, energy and emotions on them. The kids became "OK" around their mother, but never invested the same time or love they had before in her.

That was a sweet touch where the daughter oh Karl won't share you now that he ismarried to you,but he would when you were married to Dad?

Priceless

I agree with your intro assessment of Kathy's pristine lot in life and made that comment on whiteone_redone's page.

This was a cleverly crafted ending to the story. Kudos

too many type-os. Thanks for the offering.

has learned nothing, or accepted responsibility for anything.

he (and the kids) start to come back to the surface. but have a long way to go.

5 stars

"Dad tried to give Christi and ME a tongue lashing the next day" ? This error appears throughout the piece.

Otherwise good.

Like the plot - kids with a touch brainy vengeance.

btw - I have 4th row center ice seats for a hockey game in hell next week. Any takers?

NOW she wants him, now that Karl has dumped her!

I did the same shit to whore mother .Didnt use pics.I took 4pairs of her pantys and shot cum in them then hid them in 4places one under her front seat of car he found them first cleaning her car . One under her bed, couch pillow , one in dirty hamper in bathroom. Only bad thing dad didnt want her back .I didnt get it I was 13 now I understand why dad was that way.I know you think I was a bad son but she chose a DICK over her son a fucking dick ment more to her then me FUCK her.

It was funny and satirically plausible at the same time.

Best off Paul isn't a living insurance policy in case his ex's first choice didn't work out.

“I can't lose Karl again-or Karl Jr." – Too bad she wasn’t as worried about losing Paul or her first two children, then they wouldn’t be in this mess!

thru - through (the informal spelling has no place in prose)

dads - dad's (a whole bunch of times)

Grandpas - Grandpa's

When is last time - When is the last time

families - family's

lets go - let's go

Your 18 - You're 18

straighten out - straightened out

overnight Mom's - overnight at Mom's

finically - financially

Christ's - Christi's

(probably a lot more missing apostrophes etc these were just the ones that popped out)

Liked this ending.

Original ending was better..........this was just silly,stupid and not very well written....CPETE usually writes better....just my opinion.....

I liked your ending better

Excellent, very good story. Loved that it was from the Son's point of view.

This worked well as it showed another route the story could take.

IF YOU WANT US TO READ THE PREVIOUS VERSIONS THAT POST A BLODDY LINK TO IT! Spent more time finding the original that reading this!

I like this ending. But I like anything that sticks it to Kathy and Karl. Having the son doing it was a good touch.

Suck a bitchy little girl you are. It is easy to find if you aren’t a dumb ass.

Good story. Previous ending sucked

A much better ending, the irony is NOT lost on me.

Great conclusion.

Scores 5/5 easily

Forget about dumbass Harryin VA’s comments! The wife mother got exactly what she deserved. She was was a selfish bitch! She only thought about “what she needed”! She didn’t care about her first family when she gave them up! NOW she needs them, ha!

I don't remember reading this. It is a great take on the original, with the children breaking up Karl and Kathy. I enjoyed it again, and I still hate Kathy.

Why do these cheated on fathers always help the ex-wives with the kids?

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 absolutrly had me in tears from your comment. Of course the obvious answer to your rhetorical question is because we are all hypocrites in one way or another. The rest of your comment is pure genius and I thank you for the mirth I derived from it.😁👍

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Sir you absolutely had me in tears from your comment. Of course the obvious answer to your rhetorical question is because we are all hypocrites in one way or another. The rest of your comment is pure genius and I thank you for the mirth I derived from it.😁👍

It's a good FTDS. I liked it.

Meh! Karl got off way too easy. He needed some sort of medieval punishment.

Yeah a child growing without his mother let's celebrate new world morals

Karl?! Two to tango.

Agree

So so only.

Defended cheating wife to kids. What a life lesson. Oh new society. Have to fit in and run with the herd.

Right when buried

Why average?

A certain amount of these stories always take the kids to task when they tell mom like it is.

Critical error!

As other stories have it Do you want your kids raised by an immoral etc spouse!?

never found Whiteone's original stories but this was pretty funny. In a sad way

This is a perfect illustration of why the cheated on dad should always tell EVERYONE why he’s divorced from the slut. Don’t hide the sins of traitors and let people think that you are the bad person. Children especially need to know the truth as soon as possible. If not, it leaves them with false perceptions. They will eventually find out, and that will mess them up even more. A small grief immediately is better than not being in harmony with objective reality!

ZK

It always flumoxes me when the parents tell their children that they should not concern themselves with why and what-fors of the divorce because it only affects the parents... what a crock... it affects everyone in the family and if the children are old enough they should know why the divorce is happening so they will understand that it was not their fault so as not to feel unfounded guilt for it happening... the father, thinking he is being so noble and virtuous by not exposing the wife's adultry, is nothing but a bumbling fool leaving everyone else lingering in painful confusion.

One of the better sequels to this story. Always great to see this bitch get burnt. Even more fun to see Karl get tuned up a little.

Never understood the not telling the truth to the children about why the divorce unless very young. Let the cheating spouse control the messaging may seem like the moral high road, bit is really dumb. As an aside, how was Karl able to get away with snatching Karl Jr and running away. Even as a German dual citizen, he would lose the kid on extradition. He not only left the state with his son (can you say "Amber alert") UT left the country. That is essentially kidnapping. Doesn't matter if he thinks she cheated. Maybe he lives life on the road and seeks to avoid the authorities but Karl obviously did not do that here. Might take longer because of cross Atlantic legal issues, but if Karhy pursues it, eventually Karl will lose all custody, have to pay child support, get fined and likely imprisoned. Doesn't matter how good a lawyer he has except to delay things to see if she gives up.

What a delusional character—completely oblivious to the pain she has caused.

Good sequel. Well done.