All Comments on 'Taking Lovely Breeana'

I absolutely LOVED it.

Unusual material and very well written, great

melted my vaseline...give me more...studrox at yahoo dotcom

First and foremost, find an experienced editor and secure their help.

You have several grammatical errors and several misspelled words.

I give you kudos for your story line, but you lack an extreme strong amount of detail.

The entire point of writing, especially sexually oriented stories, that are obviously fantasies, is to fill in/provide all the detail, in vivid color.

Leave nothing to the imagination, you want your audience to see and feel what you see and feel.

Other wise, you are just providing fill in the blank stories.

Stop pretending to write like a girl. Your lack of extraordinary emotional depth and maturity, will not allow you, to come close to writing from a girl’s/woman’s prospective.

You are too shallow.

Your, choice of word, no girl or woman, ever uses the term “corn hole”

Last but not least, if you are so thin skinned, that you are put off or offended by my well thought out comments, then stop writing and placing yourself in a position to be criticized, stay in your mother's basement and continue to jerk off.

I love when ANONYMOUS people tell me to be mature and not offended by comments. But I do admit there will ALWAYS be grammatical and spelling errors. I've seen the complaint before and will see it again, once more my defense is the same. I am doing this for FREE. Plus I've tried the editor thing, it's not at all as easy as just finding one, so you should do your research first.

Also pre-placing an insult makes you the asshole, well thought out and probably accurate comments or not, you are still the asshole. Once more, if everyone who wrote for this site had to be up to the par that some peoples exacting expectations there with would be very little submissions, especially now that good erotic writers can earn money for their content over at the E-Reader sites. I don't think I am a professional or even semi-profession author, thus I put my stuff here, FOR FREE. To be enjoyed and I guess flamed by trolls.

This could be extended, and should be.

One of the best stories on this site. Would LOVE to see more like it's theme.

Seriously, well done!