Tank's Farewell

She looked at her watch and said, "I'd better go. Thank you, Daddy."

My smile made me feel good. Her kiss on my cheek made me feel even better. The waitress brought my bill.

"Your daughter?" She asked.

"When my best friend died I sort of inherited her and her sister as my daughters."

"You're Tank's friend?"

"Re-Pete at your service." I smiled at her. She sat down.

"He helped us. Things in my family went sour and he helped my Mom and me for months. It wasn't until he died we found out who was helping. Can I thank you since I can't thank him?"

How was he helping?"

"He put money in Mom's account at the bank every week. Not a lot, but enough we were Ok."

"Write your name, your Mom's name and phone number on a napkin, please. I'll check and find out why it stopped."

"It stopped because he died."

"If I can ask, What happened that you needed the help?"

"My Dad got drunk and into a bar fight. He ended up in the hospital and a week later he died. With him gone we had no income. We were about to lose the house and everything and one day the mortgage was paid current and we had a couple hundred in the bank."

"The week before your Dad got in the fight what were you doing?"

"Finishing high school."

"And, the week after the funeral?"

"Waiting tables here. Mom does alterations for the dry cleaners and she works in the office at the Evan's Plunge part time."

I gave her back the napkin and said, "Put your address on there too, if you would. I have an idea and I think Tank would like it."

She wrote the address and gave me back the napkin. She got up and went back to work. I left a ten as a tip.

On my way back to the apartment I stopped and had a key made, changed my mind and had two made. At home, I called my lawyer. She answered.

"What can I do for you, Mr. Peterson?"

"Tank paid a woman's mortgage current and deposited a couple hundred in her account each month." I gave her the name and address of the woman and her daughter.

"I knew about the mortgage but not about the monthly deposit. He must have made it in cash. Would you like me to start doing it again?"

" Yes, and make it five hundred extra. I'm sending Teri and Ayla to college in Spearfish in a little over a month. Rather than pay rent, maybe I should by a triplex or small apartment building and then even after the graduate they have an income source."

"You want my help?"

"Sure. You know someone there who we can trust?"

"My sister lives there and is a realtor. Let me call her and see what the story is. I'll get back to you soon."

"Ok. Thanks."

The next day Ayla arrived a little before ten. A suitcase and two cardboard boxes and she was in. She put them in the second bedroom and said she had to take Crystal's car back. While she was gone I thought about all the things they still needed before college started. One thing was a car.

I called Keys again and said, "I need to get a car for the girls. I'm new in town. I want a used car that won't die on the way home. Who do I see?"

"Go over to Bison Motors and talk to Jan. She'll help you, and I trust her."

Keys was right. She found a four year old Honda that still looked good, ran great and was both a four door and four banger. I bought it. They cleaned it up and put new seat covers on it. They also did a major service: oil, belts, fluids and new tires. The next morning they delivered it to me. Ayla and I were having Cheerios when Jan knocked at the door. She answered.

"Daddy, it's for you."

"Let her in. Offer her some breakfast and have her sit down."

She brought her into the kitchen and Jan smiled as she handed me the keys. Ayla's eyes got big, but she didn't say anything.

Jan gave me an envelope with all the paperwork in it. "I transferred title and re-registered it in your name. It has a full tank of gas, so you're ready."

"You haven't had coffee or Cheerios." I said. Ayla was starting to fidget. Jan said she had already eaten, but thanked me for the offer. I held the keys out to Ayla and said, "When you're done with your breakfast, would you take Jan back to work, please?"

She grabbed her purse and they were gone. A few seconds passed and she was back. She kissed me and said, "Thank you, Daddy!"

"Drive safely."

I don't know if she heard me. She was out the door too quickly. While she was gone Keys called. Her sister had a listing for a five unit apartment building just a few blocks from the school. She gave me her sister's number and I called her. We set an appointment for that very afternoon. When Ayla came in I stopped the gushing and asked, "I need to take a day trip. Shall we take your car or shall I go alone?"

She smiled and said, "My car is already warmed up and ready to go. Let's take my car!"

She drove. On the way out of town I reminded her that the car was a shared car. It belonged to me and I would let both of them drive it, use it and take care of it while they went to college. She would have agreed to damn near anything to be able to keep the car.

I bought the apartment building. Ayla picked apartment four as the one she and Teri would share. I was thinking about apartment one for myself but on the way back to Hot Springs I realized that would hamper their experience of freedom. When I said the word in my head it hurt. I didn't want Crystal's freedom. I actually wanted to give her some.

An old line ran through my head, "You can lead a horse to water..." Yeah, and the same goes for women!

Five minutes later I added, "Some women."

When we got home I called Crystal. The phone rang eight times before she answered. "Hullo." I might as well have been calling the morgue and one of the dead answered.

"I'd like to invite you and Teri to dinner."

"You cooking?"

"No. I thought we'd go to a restaurant. Interested?"

"You paying?"

"Yes. You going?"

"What time?"

"I thought that about six-thirty would be about right."

"Ok. What about Ayla?"

"I've already invited her. She'll be there."

"She didn't come home last night." Her tone wasn't worried, upset, happy or anything with an emotion attached.

"She told me. You want to meet us or shall I come get you?"

"Come get us." She hung up.

"Daddy, why are you inviting her to dinner?"

"An experiment. It may not work but it's worth a try."

"I need to wait to know what you're doing, don't I?" I nodded.

We took the truck and parked behind Crystal's Toyota at six-twenty. I went to the door and knocked. Teri answered. She looked freshly scrubbed and dressed nicely for dinner. She smiled and then looked concerned.

"Mom didn't shower or change clothes. She's a mess."

"Go get her, please. Remind her that I'm buying."

Two minutes later she helped Crystal out the door. She was in jeans and a sweatshirt. Something had spilled on the sweatshirt and it didn't look like it had happened today. I opened the door to the truck and they squeezed in. We drove to the diner.

We walked in and I walked to the same table where I always sat. I saw my waitress pick up four menus and look at me. I held up one finger. She came to us with one menu. She aimed it at me. I shook my head and pointed at Crystal. The waitress looked at her, then handed the menu to her.

"One menu? Place is a bit cheap."

"No. The three of us are going to trust the waitress to bring us a good dinner. We aren't even going to ask what the special is, we just want it."

Crystal harrumphed and opened the menu. When her body language said she was done, I signaled the waitress and she came to the table.

"Ready?"

The three of us want you to bring us whatever you think we'd like. Crystal, order whatever you'd like."

She did. The waitress walked away and conversation started at our table. Teri asked, "You didn't come home last night."

"I couldn't. Seeing Mom like this hurts. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to help her."

Crystal looked up at Ayla and said, "Talking about me like I'm not here doesn't help."

"Then tell me what does help, what will help." Ayla said.

"It would help if Pete would give me my freedom."

"He did, Mom." Teri said. "He moved out. He still pays the bills. How much freedom do you want?"

"And," Ayla asked, "What are you doing with the freedom, now that you have it?"

"What freedom do I have? I barely have enough money to survive. Even if I wanted to go visit your father in prison I don't have enough for gas, much less food and a room." Her voice shared her desperation, her helpless feelings.

I stayed quiet.

Ayla said, "You've actually been thinking about seeing him?"

Teri looked at me and said, "Is there room for me with you?" I nodded.

"Momma, I'm moving out! He raped us! He raped all three of us! He gave me to his friends on your bed! Now, you want to go visit him? Do you?"

"He... He needs help." Crystal said.

"No, Mom. You need help." Teri turned to me and said, "Can I have the keys to the truck, please. I've lost my appetite." I handed her the keys. As she stood the waitress arrived with the dinners.

"You're leaving?" She asked. Teri nodded. "Give me a sec. I'll make yours to-go." She served the other three and took Teri 's to the kitchen. Teri walked towards the kitchen and took the meal from her when she came out of the kitchen.

The waitress came to our table and said, "Mom and I had a visitor today. How can we thank you?"

"Go to school. Quit this job and get back in school. Did your Mom and you ever sit down and do the finances for your little family?"

"Yes. Every week."

"How much money would keep you two afloat, without the house payment?"

"I make two hundred or so a week here. Mom usually makes about seven hundred a month net. Without the house payment we scrape by."

I made a note on a napkin. The note said, "$1800 a month." She saw the note. So did Crystal and so did Ayla.

"Here's the deal. You go back to school. When you graduate you go to college in Spearfish. I happen to own an apartment building in that town and you'll live there and help take care of the building. I pay books, tuition and an allowance. You get good grades and graduate. I own your house. The deal I make with your mother is between us, but her rent is paid and she'll have enough to live on. Deal?"

"I may be a waitress, but I'm not stupid. Yes, it's a deal!"

"Then bring me the bill for dinner and after I pay it, quit and go home. Tomorrow I'll come by in the morning and talk to both of you."

"Morning is good. Mom doesn't go to the Plunge until two."

As I nodded I said, "I know. I did my homework."

She went to get our bill and I returned to my meal. She came back and I handed her a hundred dollar bill. "The bill gets paid and you go home. Take the money and go. Buy your Mom and you something nice on your way home."

As she turned I saw a tear escape from her eye. The bill was less than sixty dollars and she would be taking a forty-plus dollar tip with her.

Ayla and I finished our meals. Crystal was playing with hers. She had mixed the green beans into the mashed potatoes and her fork was making lazy circles in what by then were very cold beans and potatoes.

"I'm sorry you didn't like your dinner, Crystal. We're done. Would you like a ride home?"

"Why did you do that for her?" She put the fork down and looked into my face.

"I made a promise to Tank that I'd take care of his family. I am. I can only take care of the people who will let me. When that young woman's Dad died he left them with a house and a bucket of bills. Tank started depositing money into her Mom's account. He decided she was worth saving. I'm just following your Dad's example. If you allowed me to help you, I would. It wouldn't stop me helping her and her daughter, too. I look forward to meeting her Mom tomorrow."

Ayla looked at me and asked, "You don't even know her?"

"Nope. I found out what Tank had been doing and that's good enough for me."

I stood. "Coming?" I asked.

Without a word Crystal stood and the napkin that had been in her lap slid to the floor. She left it. Ayla picked it up and put it over her Mom's plate. Not a word had been said about the rapes. I didn't think the diner was the right place.

When I slipped the truck into PARK in Crystal's driveway I said, "Crystal, if you meant what you said about wanting to drive to Utah to visit your ex, I'll give you enough money for the trip. Figure out gas both ways, food and two nights in a motel while you're there. I'll give you the money."

"Why?"

"If I don't you can say I'm taking your freedom away. If I do, you're faced with the freedom to do whatever you want with the money. I don't care if you go see him. I have freedom too. I have the freedom to stop my heart from caring what you do. I could withdraw all support of you. I won't, because having the freedom also means I can choose to keep supporting you even when you make bad decisions. The girls make good decisions and the support they make is bigger that what you get. The waitress made some good, honorable decisions and both Tank and I reward that."

She sat still. I got out, walked around and opened her door. She stood in front of me. I took a step back. "One more thing. If I ever invite you out for anything and you step out of the house looking like a skid-row crack whore I will never see or speak to you again. The disrespect for me, for Ayla and Teri is an open insult."

I closed the door to the truck and went to the driver's side. When my door closed both girls were crying. We didn't speak all the way to the apartment. They went to Ayla's bedroom and I didn't see them the rest of the night.

The next morning I was sitting at the table with my Cheerios when they emerged from the bedroom. Red eyes and tired faces looked at me. I held out the box of cereal. They ate.

When I was done I washed my bowl and put it to dry. I went to my bathroom and get ready for the day. When I came out Teri asked, "You're going to their house?"

I nodded. "What do we do while you're gone?"

"Go get your things. Go to the market and get more food." I handed Teri a hundred dollars. I walked out.

At the front door of the address the waitress had given me I wondered if my first question ought to reveal that I hadn't learned either of their names. I knocked. The waitress opened the door. Not the nineteen-fifties waitress uniform, she wore jeans and t-shirt. Bare feet. She opened the door wide and said, "Welcome. Come on in."

She called out, "Mom, he's here." As she led me to the living room. It was sparse, clean and smelled like it got cleaned often. I stopped.

"I'm so sorry. I know I should have memorized both your names but, I didn't. Can you tell me again? Please."

A woman about fifty entered the room. She said, "I'm Helen. My daughter is Roseanne." Her daughter added, "Rose is just fine."

Helen was in a dress that was ironed, clean and beginning to be thread bare. We sat. We talked about what it meant to them that I bought their house. I explained that buying their house made me the landlord. Before I bought it the bank was the landlord.

Helen leaned forward and asked, "How do we pay the rent?"

"You don't. Rose does. She goes to school and gets good grades. She graduates. She goes to college and again, gets good grades. That pays the rent."

"Why?"

"Why what?" I asked.

"Why are you doing this for us?"

I'd been thinking about that question for a while. Why was I doing this?

"I'm not doing it for you. When my best friend Tank and I were fighting in a war all we wanted was to live through it, come home and have a better life. We thought that was enough. Now, because of Tank, we can do something more. Tank and I can make a difference for after both of us are gone. If Rose goes to college and does something good with her life, Tank and I live on in whatever she does. If Tank's granddaughters go to college and do something wonderful with their lives, Tank and I live on through them too."

Helen looked at me and said, "So this is your way of living forever?"

"Yeah, I guess that's it. I have no children, no children who give a hoot about me. They didn't look at life like I do. I could blame my wife for that, but they just look at things differently than I do. But, if I can help someone have a great life, that's better."

Rose said, "I won't let you down. I want to be a nurse. I'll be a good nurse."

"I believe that." I stood and both women hugged me. When I left they knew what was next for both of them. Getting Rose back in school, getting the bills all paid and having dinner with me once a week.

I went to the bank and deposited three thousand in Helen's account. When I got back to my apartment both girls were sitting on the couch.

Teri looked up at me and said, "You bought us a car?"

"Yes. Was that a bad idea?"

"No! I guess I'm a little confused. When Ayla told me you offered college to the waitress I thought we'd been screwed, again. I really want to go to college. I want to do something with my life. Do we get to go to college?"

"Yes!" I pulled a chair over by the couch and sat down. "Here's the deal. I want your lives to be great. Tank wants your lives to be great. College is one way to get there. Since Tank isn't here to do this, I get to. I get to act like Dad, like Tank, like Grandpa and assist you towards your goal. Crystal has chosen to send her life down the toilet. If she changes her mind, I'll help her have a great life too. It's all Tank and I ever wanted for any of you."

Ayla asked, "Are you going to ask us about the rapes?"

"No. If you want to tell me about it, I'll listen. I'm sorry it happened. Nothing anyone can do can undo what was done to you. I'm sorry. If I ever do anything or say anything that triggers bad memories about the rapes, tell me so I can avoid doing whatever again. One more thing, You're both safe here with me. I have never raped anyone and I'm not about to start."

"We know that. You're as safe as being with Tank." Teri said.'

"Is the waitress going to college with us?" Ayla asked.

"As soon as she finishes high school, yes."

"So we get to be her big sisters when she comes to college?"

"I guess. She will get one of the apartments, and probably a roommate too."

"You're going to scholarship another person?"

"Probably. We've got the money and I can't see a better use for it, can you?"

"Wow! I wish I'd known Tank better. I think you and he are a lot alike and I never got to know him very well, cause Mom was angry with him."

Over the next week they did what young women do who are about to go away to college. I went to Evan's Plunge while Helen was on duty and when she had a break we talked. On her day off I took her to Rapid City and we did some shopping. We, meaning she did the shopping and I paid for the things she got. She needed new clothes. She needed new shoes. I sent her into a shop where they sold ladies underwear and I sat out in the mall while she bought the things she needed or wanted. I gave her three hundred dollars cash before she went in and I asked her to spend a lot of it. She was gone almost an hour. When she gave me my change she blushed.

On the drive back to Hot Springs we talked. She invited me to dinner. I accepted.

"Pete, I don't want you to think wrongly of me but when you come for dinner tonight, think about staying for breakfast."

"You don't have to do that."

"I know. I don't have to do that. But, what if I want us to do that? It isn't a payback for you being so good to us... Oh, it is. No one has been that good to us, me, in years. How can I say thank you? I can cook for you, and I want to. For the past three nights I've fallen asleep thinking about being next to you in bed. I'll understand if you say no, but I want you to say yes."

"What's for dinner?"

"I bought a roast and veggies yesterday. We can have that, if that's Ok."