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In my bedroom that night, I started out nervous. I didn't have my backstop, Louise's hand making me okay. But after Rachel helped me warm up—after repeated insistence on my part that I did, in fact, want to fuck her—I realized I didn't need Louise's hands on me. She was still at my back, guiding me and holding me, even if she wasn't there.
That might have been a weird thought in most circumstances: taking comfort in an ex as you go down on a new lover. But our circumstances weren't most circumstances. Something amorphous and flexible tied us all together. And despite my insecurity around the gulf between Rachel's sexual experience and my own, I managed to please her, something I realized I'd always wanted to do. I'd just never had the self-knowledge or sense of calm to align the desire with opportunity. The next morning we ate breakfast with my parents before she caught the Greyhound home.
"Well, it sounds like you had a very nice time," my mom said, after Rachel was gone.
"I did."
I showed my mom some of the photos from the trip.
"Who's this pretty girl?" she asked, when she saw the selfie of the three of us in front of Our Lady of Cauldron.
"That's Louise. My college girlfriend. We just broke up."
"Oh honey," she said, regarding me with skepticism. "Were you two-timing her?"
I groaned. Why had I said anything?
"No, Mom." I sighed. "We're friends. It's complicated."
She raised her eyebrows, but let it pass.
"Rachel seems nice."
"Yeah, Mom, she's nice."
She pursed her lips. "I just want you to be happy, sweetie."
"I'm happy, Mom."
It was true.
- COMMENTS
K.A. Rydeover 1 year agoI enjoyed this immensely. You have an exceptional talent - I especially enjoyed your dialogue which so few writers are able to nail but which you clearly have a particular ability for. I'm excited to see what else you can produce!
NoLongerAnonover 1 year agoAn excellent follow up to Taste & Hold. I liked the fictional place names, although I can't work out which real world places some of them correspond to. And it's a mystery to me why Paris has become Cauldron. I don't know if you have loving friends like these in real life; if you do then you are very lucky.
BenLongover 1 year agoNicely done RC. A nice, fulfilling follow up to the first "taste" story. It doesn't all have to be about hot, requited or unrequited, mano y mano (womano y womano? LOL) love - as you've shown quite well, and also shown that two can lover a third (or a sixth) just as easiily.
I will admit I was a bit disconcerted by the place names. Was there a sci-fi prequel that I'd missed? Flowerday, Georgeville, Cauldron, and West Angels, and Stewardland, intermixed with Paris, and the City of Love, and the Republic of Freedom? Were these euphemisms, real place, or make believe? Regardless, in the end I guess it doesn't matter, but left me wondering whether this was a sci-fi fantasy or just a fantasy.
Well done!
