All Comments on 'That Little Spark'

Very romantic and engaging. Good back stories, strong character development. Even some plot tension. But it needed a proofreader - spell check doesn''t find any of the any small missing words that were left out. And the author tends to read what was meant to be written even if some of it is missing. Get someone else to read it and spot that before you publish. Otherwise well-done and a good read.

Great story…. well written!!!

Great story, S&F! Sweet and sexy, I knew David was in for more than a “The Proposal”-type proposal, even if Kaitlin didn’t quite get it. Loved the journal reveal, too! Great job! Easy 5* and good luck in the contest!

Loved it. 5 stars.

That being said, if I were your editor, I would use a squirt gun on you every time you wrote something like “there was a hum in the air” or “there was a crackle…”. Here’s why: those statements are unworthy of you. You’re doing a great job of showing those things already. You don’t need those statements, and they pulled me out of the feel of the story every time you felt the need to tell me something you already showed me.

Once again, loved it.

If this thing had been converted to an audio, it would've ran for two hours and some change. Dare I say it, this story had much better building blocks than Storm Warning (good story but it was missing some things). Think I'm going to set my next story to Valentine's Day, but I'm not exactly gonna write it for this challenge, I already got another challenge lined up.

Also, kids were used in this story, but it's very refreshing to see them so well-behaved.

Loved it, but I was surprised to see "man and wife" from you. Isn't this the 21st century? How about "woman and husband"? At least he built a nice new house and invited her to stay instead of dragging her by her hair back to his cave! I'd opt for "husband and wife" (or the reverse). Thanks for this story and your other ones.

Great story and an easy read. Good luck on the contest!

Cheers

SAGE

Beautiful, a delight to read, perfect for Valentines, thank you.

Another amazing story you've shared with us. Always enjoyable. Thank you.

I made lit to the beginning of page three before the triteness of the story got to me. The thought of wading through almost 5 more page of this inane tale was too much and I threw in the towel. 2*

Wonderful. Thought there might be a little more drama involving Nathan's 'father' such as a confrontation followed by the revelation in the diaries. However, a really sweet story of love for Valentine's Day.

Good Read, and a nice feel good read. I think I have said before, "English "Masters" to edit and copywrite are a dime a dozen, but good story tellers are hard to find." Actually, I stole that from a "publisher", but it is still true. You are a good "Story Teller", so get a "reader" or an editor. And Literotica needs to maybe add a plus category for "Better Than Five" :-)

It will tare your heart apart

Well written, nicely paced. Great descriptions of emotions. Thanks for this! 5/5.

As good and mushy as any I've read. 5*

Aw, sweet story, excellent characters, and a happy ending. Love it.

Very romantic!

I've never been so turned on AND cried so much reading. This is AWESOME.

Really enjoyed it.

Congratulations! If I had been a judge I couldn't pick the winner. Thanks for a great story. It was sweet, beautiful, romantic, and well written. Also, I liked it a lot. You get all the stars I can give. Will add this to my favs too

Love it. Screwball fake engagement worthy of the films

This is absolutely WONDERFUL!!

So sweet!

What a fantastic story that was. It's amazing both of us writing about twin communications at a distance at the same time. Are you sure you're not MY twin😁 You're an excellent writer with a wall of red H's. I can only hope to aspire to do as well in the future. 5*

Congrats on winning the V-Day contest.

Greatest romantic story I have read in a long time. Keep writing!

We all need an editor and I think your writing would be even better with some editing! You made quite a few minor grammatical errors. Also using descriptive words that weren’t necessary because we knew already how she was feeling. It drags on quite a bit at some points. Aside from that it was decent.

Wow, anon never got the lesson "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything". They still made it through somehow. Anyways, enjoyed it.

Marvelous story!

Nice story but an editor/proofreader would help to eliminate the typos.

Wonderful story! Thanks for sharing.

A sweet happy story with just the right amount of romance

I’ve looked at Literotica for a number of years. I read smutty smut and it’s fun and awesome and I have my favorite scenarios. I finally created a profile and wrote a little story. I’m a Transwoman, out for about 8 years, changed my name 6 years ago, last year I had surgery. Anyway, although I consider bi, I didn’t expect to be interested in men. But I notice, that my fantasies about men, are sexual, sure, but they’re also romantic. So as I’m reading this, I’m thinking, oh this is like a romance novel, like you see at the grocery story checkout. Is it contrived? Absolutely. That’s why it’s so good. He’s older, stunningly fit, he’s an architect (why do we always think this is the sexiest profession??) who just completed a dream home, he’s great with kids, he knows how to cook, he slips out of bed and let’s you sleep, he suggests you pursue your degree… and he’s a hot lover. That’s why it’s fantasy. And me, sometimes I think about being with a man, and it’s always how smart he dresses, and how he picks me up in an Audi and takes me to the symphony and then to a boutique hotel… sigh. Nice job!

Thanks for voting this story the third place winner in the Valentine's Day Contests It was a lot of fun to write, and I'm glad to see it's being enjoyed. Of course, nearly all the stories on this site are fantasies. But isn't it fun to imagine, that happily ever afters, really do happen?

Special Note to Freya, I look forward to reading your story once it's published. And thank you all for your kind comments.

Cheers,

Smuttyandfun

Thank you!

I never thought I'd get a tear in my eye reading erotic literature. What a beautiful, and sexy, story. Bravo!

A story definitely for a "chick flick" one day. Well done, heart warming and fast read. Good job by the author.

I enjoyed this story so much! It is simply such a nice, smooth read with likeable characters that I found myself "rooting for"; lovely development of the plot, to a satisfying, happy conclusion, and the romance/sex is steamy in all the right places. I look forward to reading your other stories. Thank you!

It is a well-developed story and heartwarming to read. Thanks for sharing with us.

Beautiful story I truly enjoyed it!!

Sweetly old fashioned, yet devilishly naughty. Well-crafted story that hooks you right in the heart and reels you in and then zaps you with the most astonishingly intense scenes of passion, written with that magic word voodoo of yours....great story! 5 stars

Beautiful!

As usual, great story. Please keep writing.

Beautifully romantic