The Anatomy of an Infidelity Ch. 01

The first time Arup saw Rasika, he didn't really give her much of a second look. It wasn't because she was not good looking. She had a very pretty face with a white-pink complexion, big black eyes, slightly plump cheeks, and a sharp pointed nose that betrayed her Kashmiri genes. But she was dressed very simply, in a loose knee-length kurta and jeans with a cardigan on top, had her hair tied in a single ponytail. And her body language betrayed her nervousness. In a newspaper office, where a lot of actresses, models, and socialites dropped by, even the regular employees dressed very sharply. In contrast, Rasika's simple dressing style made her seem like a bit of a simple slob.

"New hires, senior staff, to the conference room." Shinde, the editor of the Pune city supplement and Arup's boss said loudly.

Arup saved a copy of the page layout and walked with the others. This introduction of new hires to the senior staff happened every few months. At that low level, there was a lot of employee turnover. The job wasn't very glamorous. It paid very little. It didn't even have a fixed profile. After all, the "real" work, as Arup always considered it, was the main newspaper, and most of the work for that was done at the offices in Mumbai and Delhi. Their office was dedicated towards the 4-8 page Pune city supplement. Most of it was local celeb spotting, page 3 parties, maybe descriptions of some events in the city, and a whole lot of advertorials. Most of the staff on that floor was dedicated to ad sales.

But the way Shinde gave his usual pep talk to the new hires, you would be forgiven for thinking it was the investigative section of the New York Times. Arup, with two other assistant editors, stood by his boss and looked at the young crop of employees sitting earnestly on the small chairs.

"Welcome to you all. This is going to be an exciting journey." Shinde said, flashing a wide smile. "You are about to join the biggest English newspaper in the country, in the most exciting and rising city in the country - Pune. People don't realize how important the city supplements are. They are the backbone of our very identity. After all, the usual front page news, financial news, sports news, people can get from the internet these days. So why do they still buy our paper? For the dedicated and painstakingly put-together Pune supplement."

Arup kept a poker face and saw the new hires earnestly nod. He noticed the pink-faced simply dressed young lady taking down some notes in a diary, and he felt like laughing. What could she possibly find noteworthy in this banal speech?

"Remember, it is our job to give everything to everyone. Excitement, emotion, excellence..."

As Shinde continued the same speech he had been giving for many years, Arup zoned out. He scanned the group of fresh-faced youngsters and knew that if the past was any indication, half of them would quit within a month. Another quarter would quit in three months. He remembered the day 15 years ago when he had been in their place, only in the Calcutta office instead of Pune. Out of everyone that joined with him, he was the only one still with the newspaper. Almost everyone else had taken up the job just to add a bullet point to their CVs with the name of the paper, before moving on to a postgrad course or a different better job. It was the textbook definition of starting at the bottom.

But not Arup. He had joined right after graduating from college, only to pay the bills. To just have enough money to get by while he pursued his real passion - a career in music. Fifteen years later, he was still in the newspaper business, but the big break into musical super stardom proved elusive. He had moved from Calcutta to Delhi and then to Mumbai, working with the same newspaper, while chasing his dreams. But the big break never came. Eventually when his wife got a high paying partnership offer at an elite architecture firm in Pune, he had no choice but to move with her, even though Pune wasn't exactly the hotspot for the music industry. But it close enough to Mumbai, which was.

"...and this is Arup." he suddenly heard his name being mentioned. "He is one of our veterans. He looks after layout, final copyedits, and proofing. If you want to learn the in's and out's of the business, there is no one better than Arup!"

He felt a little embarrassed and just waved uncomfortably.

"...and this is Mahesh..."

The introductions continued. Arup zoned out again, thinking about a melody he had been working on. Finally the pep talks and the introductions ended. All the new hires had introduced themselves. Arup had been paying only partial attention. Almost all of them had some basic experience in the world of publishing or had a degree in something vaguely related. The only exception, he realized, was Rasika. She had studied commerce, and had worked at some call center for a few months. But her spoken English seemed the most fluent and sophisticated of the entire lot. Maybe that's why Shinde hired her, he decided. Or maybe there was no one else left to hire.

Thus ended the very first time Arup and Rasika came face to face. They didn't even talk to each other. Nor did they notice one another too much. Rasika herself had realized during the introductions that she was the exception among the new hires with no training or experience in the field. And she told herself she would have to work extra hard to prove herself. Like all others, she had taken this job with the intention of getting a foothold in the media industry. She was preparing for entrance exams to mass communication postgrad programs, and she hoped this bullet point would help her admission prospects.

Over the next month, Arup and Rasika didn't interact much either. The way the city supplement worked was simple. They had a fixed number of pages to fill. Most of the staff was in ad sales. Arup and the others on the content side had a meeting to decide on the content. Much of it was syndicated or licensed stuff that they had to edit. There were occasional local features, usually written by these new hires, about anything ranging from trend and lifestyle pieces to traffic stories to reports on events etc. These assignments would be handed out. Arup usually came in late in the afternoon and stayed till after midnight. He would keep proofing, editing, and working on the layout. The ads would keep coming till the last minute, so he and people working under him would keep making changes to the content and layout. Finally at 1 AM, the pages would be finalized and sent to the printing press.

A big part of Arup's job was editing and rewriting what the junior staff wrote. He was often dismayed at how poor their grammar, sentence construction, and spelling was. Many errors that could simply be avoided by using spellcheck. But you get what you pay for. And these low level folks got paid barely anything.

As time went by, he noticed that anything written by Rasika needed hardly any editing or re-writing. He grammar, spelling, and overall sentence construction were impeccable. Despite having no experience or training, she was much better at this job than her peers. There was no literary brilliance or insight in what she wrote, of course, because the subject matter itself was mundane. Things like what are the new party spots for college students, or how a particular art exhibition was received, or the report on a local sports event. But whatever she turned in could be frozen in the final copy without much work. Arup mentioned this at a senior staff meeting.

"Yes, I have noticed as well, that she is a very hardworking and talented girl." Seema, another assistant editor said.

"Don't tell her that." Mahesh said.

"Why?" Shinde asked.

"Come on, let's be real. If we praise her too much, she will realize she could get another job somewhere else. Maybe with buzzfeed or scoopwhoop types. And we will have to hire someone else."

There was laughter all around.

"Well, she will not be with us for long anyway." Shinde said. "She was very honest in the interview. That she is applying for communication masters programs and taking this job up only for the time in between."

"If she lasts a whole year, that would be good enough, given our usual turnover rate." Seema said.

The really high turnover rate is why none of the senior staff really formed any friendships or much of a rapport with the junior staff. And there wasn't much camaraderie or esprit-de-corps in the city supplement, unlike in the main paper, where people stayed for years, maybe even lifetimes. The city supplement offices were almost like waiting rooms at railway stations. You were together for a while, but eventually you moved on and never saw each other again.

So the interactions among colleagues were very short term and almost transactional in nature. Plus the nature of the work was such that they were always chasing deadlines, and there was so much to be done in such a short amount of time. There was no time for socialization or building up a personal rapport even if people wanted. Arup himself had worked at the Pune office for two years, but had never socialized with even the senior staff much, except for the occasional company retreat.

Which is why one Sunday evening, when Arup ran into Rasika at a mall coffee shop, it was a little awkward.

"Oh hi Sir!" she was sitting at a table for two by the door, with a small stack of books in front of her. She noticed him as he walked in.

"Hey Rasika...how are you?" he smiled and said.

"Good. Good. And you?"

"I am also good."

There was a lull in the conversation. They had never talked much beyond hi and hello at the office. Rasika's shift was 10 am to 6 pm. Arup came in at about 3-4. So they didn't see each other much in the bustling office either. As she was wrapping up her work for the day, he was just getting started.

"Entrance exam books, huh?" he said.

"Yes, sir."

"Please, don't call me sir. Just Arup is fine."

"Okay...Arup." she smiled. "Yes, I come here to study some times. I live in a PG...paying guest accommodation. And I share my room with another girl. So sometimes, this is a better place to study."

"Yeah, I understand. We don't really pay you enough to get your own place, huh? Haha."

"Hehe, I am not complaining though. The experience I am getting is very valuable." she earnestly said. Wow, even after a month, she was still idealistic about this crap, Arup thought.

"Anyway, I'll go get me a coffee. Nice to see you, Rasika."

"Nice to see you too, sir...I mean Arup." she flashed him a very cute smile.

As Arup stood in line to order, his phone buzzed. It was his wife. He was in the mall because they had planned to watch a movie together. But she had to go to her office for some last minute work on an important account.

- i will be another hour at least.

Arup read that text and shrugged. This was very common with Veena. As a partner at an architecture firm, she did have to work an inordinate amount. But he didn't mind it. It was her hefty salary that funded their comfy lifestyle. And allowed him to buy expensive musical instruments for his real passion. Even though he was at a reasonably senior position at the newspaper, the pay was still modest. By himself, he would never be able to afford that lifestyle. So if her high paying high flying career meant him having to kill an extra hour at the mall, that was not much of a price to pay.

Arup got his coffee and scanned the seating area for an empty table. It was a Sunday evening though, so the place was quite full. Rasika, who was on the phone, saw him looking around and caught his eye. She smiled and pointed to the chair in front of her. He walked over.

"...but how long...but you said..." she was saying as he approached her. She smiled at him, still on the phone. "Please, have a seat. No no...not to you..it's a colleague from work...yeah...well, let me know soon then."

By then Arup had put his coffee on the table and seated himself.

"Are you sure? I don't want to impose." he said, when she got off the phone.

"Yes, don't be silly. The place is packed." she said. "Besides, that was my boyfriend, who was supposed to join me, but can't."

"Haha, my wife just got delayed too. We were going to watch a movie here."

Rasika smiled. He smiled back. There was an awkward silence again.

"So...how do you like working with us so far?" Arup asked a very generic question.

"It is very exciting. I have only worked at boring clerical jobs before. This is a lot of fun. To be doing some writing."

"Well, you are very good at writing."

"Really? Thanks. But I'm sure you're just saying that to be nice." she blushed a little. He was amused at how her slightly chubby cheeks turned pink.

"No, I am serious. I have been doing this for a while. Usually I spend hours correcting typos and spelling errors and grammatical mistakes. Your copy is always pristine. It's a pleasure, really."

"Oh, so you mean I am good at writing because I can spell and I know grammar?" she sounded a little disappointed. Maybe she was expecting more lavish praise.

"Honestly, that is most of what is needed to be successful in this business." he responded candidly. He wasn't as idealistic about it as she was.

"Okay. Interesting." she said, looking a little dejected. He noticed how expressive her face was. from blushing happily a few seconds ago, her eyes now seemed sad.

Arup felt like maybe he had said something wrong. And felt the need to correct for it.

"I mean...don't get me wrong, Rasika. Your writing is really good even beyond the basic stuff like spelling and grammar. For instance..." he tried to remember stuff she had written. "...that piece on Lonard Cohen. That was wonderful. So detailed yet succinct. very heartfelt. As a fan of the man himself, I loved it."

"You like Leonard Cohen?" her face perked up again.

"Oh, absolutely. He is right up there among my inspirations."

"Inspirations?"

"Haha...I am a bit of a musician. Struggling musician. Really struggling. This editing stuff is just my day job. Music is my real passion."

"Really?" her big black eyes went wide with wonder. "That is so cool! What kind of music?"

"Mostly soft rock...American folk stuff...blues...ballads...that sort of a thing. But from an Indian perspective." he found himself switching to his musician side, something he never shared with his colleagues.

"I love that stuff!!" she almost jumped up in excitement. "My boyfriend is more into the usual hard rock heavy metal crap like most engineers. I prefer this soothing stuff."

"Haha, I wish there were more people like you. Sadly, most fans in India like metal. Or then alternative crap like Coldplay."

"Oh my god! I hate Coldplay! Why do they get such huge crowds?" Rasika said this so loudly that a few of the tables around them were startled.

"Thank you!" Arup was delighted. It was rare for him to find someone with opinions like these, outside his circle of musician friends. He welcomed the opportunity. "So...what was the last artist whose song you listened to?"

"Umm...Fleetwood Mac."

"Which song?"

"Dreams."

"Nice! Stevie at her best. Let me tell you something about..."

And so the conversation continued and flowered. The two colleagues, who had barely said five words to each other in the previous month of working together, found themselves bonding over a shared love of the same kind of music. Rasika listened intently as Arup talked about his favorite artists, bands, and songs. She dutifully noted a lot of them down in her diary to check out later. Arup felt good holding forth on this subject. Although his wife Veena was fully supportive of his passion, she herself did not have much of an ear for music. So it wasn't something they ever discussed in such depth. In his younger days, he had other friends who were passionate about all this. But as life had moved on, they had moved on as well, busy with their lives, kids, careers, etc. There were still a few musicians Arup jammed with. But time spent with them was getting scarce with each passing month, as they too got busy.

So in a way, Rasika was the first captive audience he had for his thoughts and feelings on music in years. And he found himself really enjoying talking to her. Rasika for her part, was a young and curious 22-year-old, just discovering her tastes in music. To listen to such an authority on the kind of music she loved, that too a musician himself, was quite a treat. Neither of them realized when an hour and a half passed, when Arups phone rang.

"Hey honey." Veena said. "I am almost there. I will meet you by the ticket window in five minutes."

"Oh cool. I will see you." he said and hung up. "Sorry, I have to go. My wife is almost here. But it was fun talking to you."

"You too." Rasika smiled. "By the way, is there any way I can listen to your songs?"

"Oh yeah, I have a soundcloud. I'll send you the link. What's your email ID?"

She told him and he sent her the link before heading off towards the movie theater in the mall. Just as he got done buying the tickets, his wife Veena walked in. She was dressed in an elegant business suit, not a hair out of place. He smiled, and as he had for the 7 years of their marriage, and before that, 4 years of dating, marveled at how impeccably model-like she always looked.

Later that night, as Arup thought about his chance encounter with Rasika in the coffee shop, his feelings towards her were still strictly platonic and neutral. She was a fresh-faced and eager 22-year old colleague who was interested in his kind of music. Although she was good looking in a cute kind of way, there was nothing about her that struck him as ravishing or attractive in a primal sense. Besides, he was still very much in love with his wife, and still found her the hottest and most interesting woman in any room. Rasika's feelings towards him were similar. He was kinda like a boss to her, many years her senior. Although she found him to be very interesting after that conversation, there was nothing more in her mind. She loved her boyfriend, her first serious boyfriend she had given her virginity to a year ago, and the man she was sure she would marry and spend the rest of her life with.

So neither Arup nor Rasika really planned or even actively wanted what happened to them next. Things just progressed through a combination of temptations and bitterness. And that is what led to the descent into Infidelity.

The next day when Arup strolled into work at about 4 PM, he saw Rasika look up from her desk and smile and wave at him. He smiled and waved back, before heading to his section. He sat in one corner of the floor with other layout and editing people. She sat at the very opposite end with at-large writers, reporters, and new hires. He got seated at his desk and logged into the computer. His work email on the email client, and his personal email on the browser. Just as he was going through the daily instructions from Shinde about that day's pages, his personal email page pinged. It was from Rasika, in reply to his soundcloud email.

- I loved all the songs. You are very talented. And I especially loved the lyrics. Who writes those? Is it you?

Arup smiled. He had not gotten such effusive feedback about his music in years, He replied, before getting to work.

- Yes, I write the lyrics. Thank you for your kind words. Which song did you like the most?

He worked on the basics of the layout, and downloaded all the content stuff to work with. One of those was a piece by Rasika on the top ten pav bhaji places in the city. Knowing that it would have no errors, he gave it a quick read and set it aside. A while later, her reply came.

- Gosh, they were all so great! But if I had to pick one, it would have to be Sunset on Mercury. It reminded me so much of the poetry of Allen Ginsberg.