All Comments on 'The Baby-Sitter Diaries Ch. 03'

Keep it up, I can't wait for the next chapter!

Well written, well thought out and a great story. More, more, more, please!

Once David, Patty, and then those two and Rebecca, get down to business, the narrative effectively conveys the erotic content therein. But your series has two big problems.

First, I don't buy that David would think of Rebecca in a sexual way. I'm approximately his age, and there are young women I know now whom I have watched grow up, and I can tell you that you after they're "blossomed," you don't start thinking about them as receptacles of unrequitted lust. You think of them as the "little girls" they used to be. Indeed, it does not occur to you to think of them any other way - at least for the well-adjusted mind. Now if David had been depicted as more of a perv, or with quasi-lolitist leanings, I could see the attraction because it would have a more believable context surrounding it. But you make David sounds like a more or less normal middle-aged man.

Another possibililty would have been to set the golf tournament in an exotic locale where the two families went to vacation together (I was thinking "Blame It On Rio" two paragraphs in). In that flick Michael Caine has never previously thought of Demi Moore in a carnal way, but then he and his best friend's families go to Rio, and his friend's teenage daughter's inhibitions are swept away, and she comes on to her "uncle," and tells him that she's always had a crush on him, and the shock, the tropical surreality, and the sudden, unexpected opportunity overpower his common sense, and she's got an unbelievable rack, and suddenly they're doing it like rabbits behind a beach sand dune. But there were none of those compromising factors here. If David was the level-headed adult he appears to be, I think it would take more to knock him off the fidelity wagon.

Nevertheless, that much can be ignored with some effort, because after all, this is Literotica, not the classics of English literature.

But you completely lost me on the connection of Rebecca's proxy seduction with Patty's desire to rekindle their sex life.

If the idea was to loosen *David* up, I fail to see where that outcome was manifested. When he gets home from "slapping his balls" on the fairways, first thing he does is shower. When he emerges, there's his wife, nude, in an incendiary pose. She then proceeds to, as it were, "rock his world." The question should be obvious to every reader at this point: what had Rebecca to do with it? Couldn't Patty have seduced her husband like this pretty much any time she wanted?

Once again, speaking as a middle-aged man, I can say with utmost confidence that if I got home, took a shower, came out and found my wife similarly configured, I'd be diving across the bedroom like Louis DePalmer in that episode of "Taxi" where his boss' wife is leading him on. David's reaction here made perfect sense (as did his panic attack when Rebecca showed up and followed him upstairs).

The only thing I can come up with is that Patty thought David didn't want her anymore, or had lost his interest in sex in general and was dubious of her own ability to re-light his pilot light, and thought sacrificing a virgin would do the trick. But by that logic, he should have beheld his wife striking that erotic pose, yawned, scratched his ass, and wondered out to the living room with a beer to find a ball game on the tube.

At worst theirs appeared to be a problem of communication. She wanted more and better sex and he did too but each assumed the other didn't and wasn't willing to broach the subject or take more direct measures. I would have appreciated a more marriage-centered story-telling vehicle, since none of David's and Patty's problems had anything to do with their tender young babysitter.

Really, what Patty did should have blown everything sky-high. She *entrapped* her own husband, for heaven's sake; yeah, he succumbed to the temptation, but if I'd been he when Rebecca showed up on Sunday afternoon for the impromptu menage, at some point (probably after all the moist merriment was past - they *did* catch him off guard, and repeatedly so), I'd have been royally pissed. At the very least I would have wondered with dismay what my wife had become, or perhaps had always been and wondered how I'd missed it all those years.

I would also have had the presence of mind to put on some clothes before I opened the front door. I mean, jesus, what if that had been the Publisher's Clearing House people standing there with one of those giant cardboard million-dollar checks? Or a pair of Jehovah's Witnesses? Just how big *are* those Watchtower tracts, anyway?

If I have one ongoing criticism to make about the fiction submitted on this site, it is that sex is almost never presented in a realistic context. And I don't mean the usually roaringly unlikely scenarios, either, but in the sense of there being "mornings after" and real-life consequences for the characters' oftentimes grievous errors in judgment.

So far in "The Babysitter," we've seen David have hot sex with a girl young enough to be his daughter, hot sex with his wife, and hot sex with both of them. If I were picking up where you left off, I'd draw down the flesh-slapping and go to work on fleshing out the characters themselves. In reality, these "good times" couldn't keep rolling.

They didn't in "Blame It On Rio," either. And David doesn't even have that excuse.

First of all, Oregon/Dave ... please do not be upset, because if these stories were boring, we would have been reading some one elses story instead of writing about yours.

I have no problem with David having the hots for Rebecca. Some of the most popular stories at literotica are about incest, and at least this one is about a middle age guy who is trying to regain his youth with some one who only seems like a daughter to him. I could really feel the guilt in the first two stories, and that puts the story above half the father/uncle/daughter/niece stories at Literotica. And this sweet inocent little girl could be the poster child for those of us who really believe that the female of the animal kingdoom is the true sexual aggressor.

As for Patty... my take was that she felt some sympathy for Rebecca's sexual mis-experiences ( maybe the same thing happened to her) and decided in a burst of female/motherly bonding to loan David out for the evening. However by the time he got home reeking of sex, Patty panics and decides to do whatever it takes to make sure that David dosen't make a habit of bonking the high school cheerleading team.

Bringing Rebecca back into the house just adds fuel to a common theme that all females are at least bi-courious, or maybe Patty realizes that the only way to keep Dave is by sharing. At least when the old guy is worn out, the two gals can amuse each other. My only real concern is that unlike stories one and two, this one have too much sex too fast and not enough, as we have seen other say, character development. And if Rebecca's parents end up naked, I am out of here.

Don't listen to the person before this. I have been the babysitter...and I had a great time. There is nothing like getting fucked senseless in the living room while the mother of the house is upstairs and clueless. And YES, she was clueless. In fact, we still do it, and it has been nearly 20 years. Naturally, I am not the babysitter anymore. I am the mistress now. The sex is great and I don't have to deal with the marriage part of the deal. Can't ask for more than that.

Very interesting development. Now is the wifey going to help you to breed the babysitter because the latter has decided she also wants to have your baby?

Too bad Patty didn't suck Rebecca's toes while she was fingering her pussy and David was fucking her ass. She might have passed out also from the overwhelming sensations.

We need a chapter on Patty and Rebecca together and then David joining in.

Some of your expressions made me smile ("She rode my face like a rented mule") but still kept me aroused with the story.

It's a Five Star.

Don't you get tired of fives in your ratings? I loved it and am open to more. Thanks for sharing you wild talent.