The BBC

I'd find another job as soon as I got back from Vegas. Then I'd also find a place to stay. My welcome at my parents' house was wearing thin and Eric hadn't been willing to let me use the house after the second time I left it a mess.

As I thought about it, I was actually looking forward to calling him to ask if he could keep Erica for the next week too. I was sure he'd do it in a hot second but he'd insist on keeping to the schedule. That would mean that he'd have her three weeks straight. For him not to be her real father he sure as hell loved her.

I felt shitty as soon as I'd thought it. Eric used to love me the same way. And it was my own fault that we weren't together. Eric loved Erica as much as he did because I had sold him the story that she was his daughter.

But in my own defense ... I really believed she was. The girl looks just like him. Until the school did that damned DNA test I didn't know for sure either.

I'd been sleeping with at least four guys when I got pregnant. Two of them had been one-night stands. Another had disappeared as soon as I told him. Eric was the only one with the balls to say, we'll get married.

I had suffered too. Over the course of our marriage there had been times when I really wanted, and I mean REALLY wanted to have another baby.

But I couldn't. What if the new baby looked nothing like Erica? Or worse what if the new child looked so much like Mark that the differences really stood out? I couldn't risk it.

If only I'd had that attitude about sex. I's still be with my husband. I'd still have my ideal life, instead of living with my parents like a failure.

I took a deep breath and hoped.

"Hello," he said.

Just the sound of his voice made me feel better.

"Eric ... I need a favor," I began.

"Why ask me? We're not married anymore," he said. His entire tone was very flippant. It was almost like he didn't love me anymore.

"It's about Erica," I said. "You know ... OUR daughter!"

His tone thawed instantly. It was as if he'd been preoccupied but now I had his full attention.

"Eric, I have to go out of town next week, so I was wondering if you could keep her?" I asked.

"Shit!" he said. "I'm going on a cruise ..."

"A cruise!" I hissed. I was pissed. I had literally no money and my ex was going on a fucking cruise without me.

"I have an idea," he said. "I'll call you back."

I couldn't believe it. I got the idea that he was going to get someone to take his place on the cruise. It only took him about twenty minutes to get back to me.

"I've got it covered," he said. "Enjoy your trip."

The more I thought about it, the more I'd rather have gone on the cruise with him, but he'd never offered. He knew that going on a cruise was on my bucket list.

I was going to say something but he'd hung up. I called him back.

"What Dana?" he asked.

"I just wanted to thank you and tell you that I'm sorry you're gonna miss the cruise," I said. "Erica has a great Daddy."

"I'm taking her on the cruise with me," he said. "I called her teacher. She can afford to miss five days of school. And she'll have a great time. Bye Dana."

Somehow the phone call ended with me even more miserable. I called Peggy to tell her that I could go to Vegas with her.

"What happens in Vegas ...!" she gushed.

"Follows you home and fucks up your life," I finished for her.

"Weren't you the girl who was worried that her ex-husband might know some of the guys she was screwing?" she asked. "So now you'll have guys from a completely different state. Besides he's your ex-husband ... emphasis on EX."

"But I don't want him to be an EX," I said. "And did you know that he's going on a cruise? I can't even get a place and he's going on a cruise without me."

"So, you're leaving the kid with your parents?" she asked.

"No," I wailed. "He's taking her with him on the cruise. He hadn't planned on it but he somehow arranged it on the spur of the moment."

"So, let's just go to Vegas and party," she said. "That'll be a lot more fun than just staying here and moping over the fact that your ex is going on a cruise."

"But how are we paying for all of this?" I asked.

"I have a rich friend out there who has parties all the time," she said. "It keeps his out of town clients happy, but keeps them out of the casinos so he can get them to concentrate on business. He likes to have attractive women at his parties. Trust me there will be a bunch of women there besides us."

I had misgivings from the start. I called my daughter since I was sure that Eric didn't want to hear from me. She was almost too excited to talk to me.

All she talked about was the brochure Eric had given her about the ship and things to do on board. The more she read to me the angrier I got. It sounded like my dream vacation. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that the cruise would be the perfect opportunity to get back together with Eric.

I called the cruise line that Erica had told me was running the cruise. They told me two things the first was the price of an individual cabin aboard the ship. My head exploded when I heard it. The second thing was worse. Except for a few un-booked cabins that were held by tour groups or clubs, the ship was sold out.

That explained to me how Eric had worked things out so fast. His woman haters group had obviously booked a block of cabins at a discount rate. He'd probably called a few people and moved them around to give himself a bigger cabin to share with his daughter.

This would only create another problem for me. Our separation had changed our family in ways that I had never anticipated. I'd concentrated on the relationship between Eric and myself, but I had neglected the one between my daughter and I. As a result, Erica grew closer to her father every day, while she and I grew more distant.

I vowed to work on that relationship as soon as I got back from Vegas. The problem was though that I was kicking a lot of cans down the road. I was gonna get a job ... down the road. I was gonna get a place ... down the road. I was gonna get Eric back ... down the road. Now I was gonna fix things with my daughter ... down the road. That was a lot of fucking road.

* * * * * *

Eric

I have no idea why I was so nervous. I'd explained things to the guys and there were no problems there. All forty current members of the club were aboard the ship. I wasn't the only member who'd brought a guest along. There were several of us who'd brought a guest to share a cabin.

I wasn't even the only person who'd brought two guests. We had a couple of guys who'd brought a brother or two along. I also wasn't the only member who had dared to bring a woman. Will had brought his mother along and that older black woman was a pip.

I had explained to the guys that I had to either bow out of the trip or bring Erica with me. They decided emphatically that I should bring my daughter. Most of the guys had seen her from time to time and once or twice had played video games with her on one of the giant screen TVs at the clubhouse on our poker nights.

The big problem was that I wanted Erica to have fun and experience everything there was to do on the cruise but she was only ten and I couldn't have her wandering around alone while I handled keeping things organized for the club.

That was the reason that things had been so awesome when I was married. Whatever one of us couldn't for our daughter, the other handled. It may not really take a village to raise a child, but it really does take TWO parents.

There was no way I wanted to invite Dana along. I still got sick just talking to her. My first choice had been to invite Erica's grandparents. Nancy loved the idea but just wasn't sure her husband was up to it. His recovery was taking far longer than expected.

Nance thought that a lot of it was in his head. She thought that he was afraid to exert himself because he didn't want to have another heart attack. So, he ... in her words ... "Sat on his ass holding onto his chest."

That limited my options. So reluctantly ... okay maybe not so reluctantly ... I called in a favor.

There I was standing on the ship's deck watching people coming up the gangplank and wondering where the hell she was.

I felt my daughter turn to look at something but I kept my eyes peeled towards the throng of people coming aboard.

"Have ya bin waitin' lawng?" I recognized that soft Texas drawl anywhere, but she wasn't talking to me. She was actually talking to Erica.

"Jenny!" my daughter gushed excitedly. "I love your outfit!"

I turned and almost fell over the railing. During the flight from Michigan to the coast, my daughter had barely let go of my hand and had never left my side. This was all new to her.

But in a heartbeat, she had turned to a total stranger and ... Hey, how'd she know her name?

Jenny was fucking breathtaking. There's no other way to describe it. She was literally covered from head to below her knees, but still managed to be the sexiest thing on the ship.

Her outfit was incredible. She wore one of those Audrey Hepburn type pillbox hats with a very sheer veil that seemed to highlight her face rather than hiding it. The hat was white. The dress below it was navy blue. It was very form fitting and showed off her body's incredibly sneaky curves to great advantage. A white belt that matched the hat cinched in her tiny waist.

The dress tapered in to outline her slim hips, protruding rear end and shapely legs. White heels that were so high she could have gotten a nose bleed completed the outfit.

She smirked at me and shook her head. "Yer staring agin," she said.

"I was just ... " I began. "I was just worried that you weren't going to make it."

"Daddy and me took th' plane ahead a yours," she laughed. "We bin here since breakfast. I already found all a th' fun stuff for the two of us ta do."

"Hey what about me," said Erica. "I wanna do th' fun stuff too!"

"I was talkin' about me and yew, Honey," said Jenny. "Yer daddy's got ta' play with the boys. But if he's real good ... maybe we'll let him ever once in a whahl."

For the next four days, we had nothing but fun. I made sure that all of my guys had the best time of their lives. I also got to know each and every one of them a little bit better.

But most of my time was actually spent watching or hanging out with my daughter and Jenny. The three of us clicked into what just seemed like a natural fit, even though I seemingly ended up on the losing end of every game or comparison.

Two days before we were due to disembark my train to happiness ran completely off of the tracks and into unknown and unforeseen territory.

Erica and Jenny were going to one of the pools aboard the ship. Erica was trying to teach Jenny how to swim better. Jenny had sworn she was gonna teach Erica to ride a horse when we got home in exchange.

I was supposed to judge our clubs first annual diving, water antics and belly flop contest. The problem was that after the first dive the eight contestants decided to call it a draw and move on to the first annual afternoon beer chugging contest instead.

With no need for a judge, I adjourned to the pool to watch my ten-rapidly nearing eleven-year-old daughter teach a grown woman how to swim.

I settled down into a deck chair near a guy I'd seen around the ship enough times to make conversation with. He was there with another group and seemed like a friendly sort. He was one of those chubby-life of the party types who thought that since people thought he was funny he must have been God's gift to women.

"Man, that chick needs to just stop teasing me and bring that not little body over here and get what she needs," he said. I just looked at him.

"Who?" asked one if his friends who was seated on the other side of him.

"Right there," he said. "The babe with the long brown hair. You can tell she's hiding and outrageous body under that swim suit. She wants me. She keeps bending over and thrusting those titties out right in front of me."

I sat up and looked over at him seriously.

"If you guys weren't here, she'd probably already be sucking my ..." before my brain had a chance to register what I was doing I had jumped up cocked my fist back and was about to deliver the hardest punch I had ever thrown.

My anger was off the charts. Luckily the punch never landed. There was a giant fist holding my arm back. I spun and saw Thom.

"Ah can see that Ah got here just in time," he said. "And this shit ain't unrelated ta what ah wanted ta tawk about!"

"Whah happened?" said the chubby comedian. "Do you know her or something? I thought you guys were from that gay club. You know the guys that hate women!"

Apparently, it wasn't his day. The guy couldn't stop putting his foot in his mouth and saying dumb things in front of the wrong people.

As soon as he said gay club, Thom turned and busted him in the mouth so hard that the chair he was sitting in collapsed under him and folded up.

His friend instantly surrendered by holding both hands up in the universal, "I don't want any fuckin' part of this shit," gesture.

"He had it comin' ..." said Thom.

"No argument," said his friend quickly.

Less than a minute later there were people all around us. Two of the crew members had come over to see what was going on.

"His chair just folded up spontaneously," I lied. "He WAS a little drunk though. Don't worry Commodore. You and the admiral go back to work. We'll take care of him."

The crew members shrugged their shoulders and walked away just as the guy regained consciousness.

"Whah happened?" he asked groggily.

"You shot your mouth off one too many times ... Maybe two," said his friend.

"All I said was that they're in a gay club," said chubby. "Nobody cares about stuff like that."

"Except that it's not a gay club," said Will. "Some people might find that insulting ... Whoops I guess some body did. I'll buy you a beer and explain it to you."

"Are you okay?" asked Jenny. "She was scanning my face for any sign of pain or injury."

"I almost hit a guy," I said.

"Uh ... Ah'm the one that had ta hit him," said Thom.

"He wouldn't let me hit him," I said.

"It's okay Eric," she said. "You kin hit th next one."

"Jeezus!" said Thom.

"Why'd you almost hit him?" she asked.

"The guy was staring at YOU," said Thom.

"Ah thought that was YOUR job," she smirked at me.

"Jenny ... Sweetheart, go get ready for dinner," said Thom. "Eric and I have to discuss some club business."

We sat down under an umbrella to talk. "Eric you're a good guy so ah'm gonna be straight with you," he said. I instantly got nervous.

"I like bein' a part uh this club," he said. "So, we need to discuss its future." I was instantly both on guard and confused.

"What would happen if YOU were to uhm ... quit?" he asked. "Or maybe just move on?"

"Why would I do that?" I asked.

"Eric last night we sat at the same table at dinner," he said. "What did Jenny eat?"

"She had the spaghetti with that weird sauce and shrimp scampi," I said.

"What did I eat?" he asked. I drew a blank.

"See my point?" he asked.

"Not exactly," I said.

"Jenny never wears anything other than jeans and T-shirts. As soon as she found out about this cruise she started buying clothes like they were going out of style," he said.

"Uhm okay," I said, still confused.

"I'm a big strong guy," he said. "But I'm also smart enough not to stand in the way of two freight trains that are about to crash. Ya know? Some things just can't be stopped."

He took a long sip of his beer and started to say something but all I could see was Jenny walking towards us with my daughter Erica in tow.

"Daddy we're tarred of eating in restaurants," announced Erica. We wanna get somethin' ta go from the dinner buffet and sit out on deck."

"Okay," I said. I noticed that my suburban daughter was developing a drawl. She was beginning to drop her "g," s and stretch out her syllables.

"What did you and mah Daddy talk about?" asked Jenny. "Was it secret stuff that only hah rankin' membuhs of the loyal order a water buffalos can know?"

"I have no idea," I said. "We talked about what you and he had for dinner. We talked about the club ... and about you wearing jeans and buying lots of clothes and then we talked about trains."

"Ah need a favuh," she smiled. I just nodded.

"Ain'tcha gonna ask what it is?" she smirked.

"It's a big one," she said.

"Okay," I shrugged my shoulders. "What do I have to do?"

"Get dressed and take me dancin' ..." she said.

"Okay," I said.

"Erica will probably be asleep before dinner is over. All uh that swimmin' we did tahred her out. Ella is gonna babysit her."

"Okay," I said.

"Yeah?" she said. Her smile lit up the area. I had never seen anything like it.

I got Thom and Willie to cover for me during the evening's shenanigans. They both seemed proud to do their parts.

"Where are you gonna be?" asked Thom.

"Uhm ..." I gulped. His eyes bore down on me.

"I'm uh going ...d-d-dancing," I said.

"Fuckin' Trains!" he grumbled. "There ain't no way ta stop 'em."

"Uh yeah!" said Willie, looking as confused as I was.

Ten minutes later I was in the shower and changing into a monkey suit. I looked in the mirror and changed my tie. Then I changed my shirt.

I wore a black suit for some reason. I had a couple of blue suits but the black one just seemed to feel right. I wore a black shirt under it and a bright yellow tie for a splash of color. I changed out of the yellow tie and opted for a red bow tie. I felt like James fuckin' Bond. I had to have a vodka martini ... shaken not stirred.

I was pretty proud of myself. I knew that I looked good. I knocked on Jenny's door and she opened it before the second knock.

"Shhhh," she whispered. "She's trying to fight going to sleep."

"Where we goin' ...?" asked my daughter barely able to stay awake. "I love you Daddy," she mumbled as she lay down on the sofa.

I carried her back to her bed. When I turned around Jenny was staring at me and all of the blood vacated the top head for the lower one.

She was stunning. Her little black dress left very little to the imagination. But it was her beautiful face that I couldn't look away from.

When she smiled at me I just heard a rushing sound in my ears.

We didn't so much dance as just stand in the center of the dance floor with our arms wrapped around each other. Sure, we swayed back and forth some, but it was really just one extremely long hug.

Once, between songs, I got drinks for both of us. I got Jenny a glass if chilled white wine and got myself a vodka martini ... shaken not stirred.

"For someone who hates wimmen, you sure do feel good," she said. "Ah feel so warm and safe ..." right in the middle of what she was saying I ran out of the ballroom and leaned over the ship's railing.

I spat violently several times. I looked at Jenny and saw a combination of fear concern and laughter on her face.

"What's wrong?" she said.

"My drink," I gushed. "That shit is awful."

She took one sip and she too started spitting the taste of it out of her mouth. "It tastes like medicine," she said. "What is it?"

"A vodka martini, shaken not stirred," I said proudly.

"Why'd ya order that?" she asked.

I frowned.

"Eric yew know Ah .... well yew know yew kin tell me anything," she said.

"I ordered it because ... " I mumbled. She smiled at me as if urging me on.

"Jenny being with you makes me do dumb things," I said. "I felt like James Bond all dressed up for you so I ordered James Bond's drink and ... I'm not a big Travis Tritt fan but you make me feel ten feet tall and bullet proof."

She put her tiny hand over my mouth then.