All Comments on 'The Beginning of the End Ch. 01'

Congratulations on your first adventure in the loving wives category. Despite this being a very good story I fear it will receive quite a bit of flack. But I'm afraid that's par for the course wherever a hint of cuckold is involved.

As far as the story goes, it's very well written with good characters, and a slightly novel idea. Well narrated and hot in all the right places. The title gives a heavy hint about where its headed, and Talia's responses back this up. Whether this happens we will have to wait and see, hopefully not too long a wait.

There are, for me a couple of negatives, firstly Damien's huge cock. As I said, the characters are good but why the overused and boring enormous appendage, this story is strong enough without having to be supported by ridiculous clichés. It's like every cuck has to have a tiny dick, or every black man has to be irresistible, not to mention the compulsory big cock.

Secondly is Talia's surrender. It all happened much too fast. Her character was written as a no nonsense, strong, but maybe a little nervous woman. She has her own mind, this was arranged simply as a one off to keep her husband happy. Then just one glimpse of Damien and she morphs into a complete slut, willing to do anything he tells her. Yes it made for erotica reading but it also took away a huge amount of credibility.

But that's the authors perogative. It was still a very hot story nevertheless and I for one will be looking forward to the next installment.

Poof the heroine morph from a strait laced woman into a cock crazed nympho. Too many worn out cliches. Black man, big dick. No thanks

Not my favorite theme (cuckoldry) but this piece is well written/resonates for several reasons: You assemble a uniquely interesting set of characters (Sara especially intriguing), tackle explicitly humiliation, the most unappealing/hard to reconcile element of cuckoldry in today’s erotic fiction, at least for most readers, and the sex scene comes off sensual. Did not see the NTR element — must come in subsequent parts of your storyline. What is evident in the closing lines and your title is the rather foreboding notion that one cannot rewind reality (to borrow a phrase from the title of a piece on cuckoldry by Chloe Tzang). There is a huge difference between fantasy and reality and the porn Phillip liked is fantasy. Couple of drawbacks for me: You have a captivating story without painting Damian with a giant cock (so cliche and unnecessary) and she succumbs too quickly, especially the way you characterized her at outset — nervous, yes, but seriously skeptical, a woman with some agency. Look forward to reading next part; future may be clear but you write well, so curious. By the way, liked your succubus pieces — you enjoy a vivid imagination.

Very well written. As some of the others have commented, your story will get slammed by many, but take heart in the fact that they hate the theme of the story, not the quality of the writing. Looking forward to the next parts.

Lovely! Ignore the inevitable haters and keep this going! I long to see the couple descending into total depravity and humiliation!!!!

What a story with full cliché, of course the bull is the more handsome man ever, with 2x Dick size and he is her best sex ?

You try to use all Bad cliché in one Time ?

So you turn your wife into a whore to pay the bills? This is a loving wife that started as a snob. For all the education and braincells that they have it comes down to physical ability to make the money. The reason why so many college kids change their fields of study and work life once they graduate.

I feel the title in the story.

Who lies ends his relationship.

It sure feels like I've read this before somewhere.

This is British, right, or that cultural influence? Monarchy, big guy telling the little people what to do. And all the women line up, hoping to just get a dip from the big guy, before they go back to the rube. Fine, if it works for you rubes.

\

I wonder if the wolf, as he eats out the guts of his latest sheep, ever wonders why the sheep take it? Lots of sheep, a few wolves. But the sheep have no confidence, no self esteem, no courage; no brains. But they were born sheep. Why would someone decide to make themself a sheep? And what kind of woman would want a sheep? Guess the rest of this story is going to illustrate that.

Another dumb ass husband soon to be totally humiliated eating wife’s lovers cum out of her pussy and eventually licking lover boys cock clean. Disgusting ….

He didn't get to see the part where she took off the condom, frantically taking him back into her unprotected pussy. Her animal side taking over and she stroked and squeezed his cock, begging to cum in her grasping pussy. He missed hearing her cry out as he filled her with his potent sperm.

He would see it all the next time.

I'm sure there are some men who enjoy seeing their women with other men and/or enjoy being humiliated. There are also people who enjoy experiencing physical pain. Most people have no problem calling the later sick puppies, and I believe you can say the same about the former.

Well written and presented. Thank you. Many "Bull" type scenes are "acted out". Getting a person into a mental and emotional state that allows them to give themselves permission to "Let go. To allow their deepest fantasies to take hold... even if just for an evening. Remove the limits." So, that's the presentation I mentioned. Keep up the good work. Perhaps next time we will find out what the lovely Talia explored so lovingly and excitedly. Cheers.

Don’t like where this is going. Why do everyone think men of color are some fantastic lover. We all don’t have big dicks. Are white woman that stupid . It was well written but men with small dicks are not all wimps. The question I have is Why marry?I now understand why the younger guys i know refuse to marry. Hell they tell me they get for free and don’t have to deal with the baggage. They just tel the bitch the door is right there. They tell me they can have a new slut move in in a few weeks

Autumn_Ash I enjoyed your initial foray into LW land and my gratitude for sharing it.. Take heart graymangazer, Talia surrendering initially doesn't guarantee she can be so easily won. Perhaps future resistance and ensuing behavior corrections are in the offerings to come. This interested reader will be checking in to see who wins in the end.

Please continue!!

Well at the least title tells us how the story will end and Talia's attitude and actions towards Phillip all but confirmed it. Well written story Ash.

Same plot over and over. Two stars.

Congratulations on putting another fetish story in Loving Wives and declaring yourself one of the low-IQ idiots that constantly shits in this category in an attempt to prove themselves the biggest asshole! You managed to include a wife in your story though, so you're not going to take the top asshole honors...

Mediocre at best.

Yes very innovative...

Another weak ass simp/cucky and a lying, manipulative slutwife who professes love even that's not the case. I mean it's not like it's been done a thousand times on here.

And Jaydean409, just go out your cock cage on and be ready to suck cum outta someone's ass.

It amazes me, OK, it doesn't, it's exactly how I expect, the amount of comments on this type of story that are, to put it bluntly, gibberish. I seems the 'real men are actually regressing, for those poor unfortunates who don't understand it means going backwards. Comment on the story, not the subject.

A good attempt, sexy and compelling. I agree with the previous comments regarding penis size etc. But personally I just ignore those clichés. Perhaps try to write for yourself instead of trying to please a certain type of reader, and disregard the woman hating mommy boys.

Good start, erotic scenario and interesting plot. Steer clear of clichés and write what you think is best.

Definitely worth a continution.

Sbrooks nailed it

I would just add 'rubbish'

Wow! I did not expect this comment section to be so lively lol. Thanks for the feedback, I genuinely appreciate it (even the negative feedback), and thanks for the kind words to those who offered them. I suppose it's a failing of mine if this didn't come through in the piece but to lend some insight:

I'm writing the kind of story I like, where a man, through a combination of hubris and lack of awareness, seals his own fate. And where a woman discovers the joys of living more freely and casts aside the shackles of her "normal" life as she's corrupted. If that's not your thing, then that's totally cool, but I will never understand people who trash talk something for being the kind of story that it is, rather than the kind that they want.

As for the clichés, I did kind of throw the big dick thing in because I suppose I thought it was a staple of the genre. That's on me, I'll own that one. I care more about the emotional betrayal, sexual skill, and seduction anyways, so regardless expect more of that. As far as Damian being black... I never said that he was? I intentionally left his description racially vague so you can insert the handsome man of your choice.

Anyways, I'll probably keep writing this regardless of the reception. I had fun writing it, and I'll take criticisms in stride and try to improve in the next entries. As some have pointed out, Talia just bit off more than she could chew this time. There is still much further for her to fall.

Cheers all!

Yes, please keep this story going. Talia was a dominant in the marriage but the table were being turned on her with Damian. She thought she could be in control. Phillip never should have pushed her into this as Talia will never be satisfied with him again. This looks like this will be a very enjoyable ride for someone, just not Phillip.

From a faithful wife to a skank loving black bitch whore egged on by a submissive black owned porn star. It took 5 seconds for the previously intelligent and faithful wife to be a black cock loving bitch. Let's hope the black cock loving bitch ends up pregnant and then everyone will know how pathetic the cuck is.

So many half an inch long wearers full of insecurities on the comment section. That's great ♥

Great closing line! You sure have upset the little dicked hypocritical moralist boys with this one! Keep up the good work

Next time Damien needs to fuck her sans condom. When she returns to her husband it will be with a collar around her neck and a baby growing in her.

I was curious as to why people thought he was black. I thought you mentioned he had blue eyes so I imagined him more of a Southern European type maybe with some roma blood in him. The "big dick = good lover" is a bit of a tired trope. I think he was really strong enough in the way he interacted with Talia and took her there even without the penetrative sex. And although that is a bit of a trope as well, it is far more interesting and far more realistic. I love to eat pussy. In my 20s I was a bit of a man slut. I had girls genuinely surprised when I ate them to orgasm. Like I remember a tryst I had and the look on her face with those beautiful dark eyes looking down at me like putting the pieces together of what just happened. I was her first lover to give her an oral orgasm. And a strong one. She was 28... 28!!!! What the fuck?

And I can also see some guys who have this fantasy of what they want (which your character did have) and then being confronted with something completely different in reality and realising that this is not what they expected and that they are not in control. Right now, Talia is probably amused by what happened and enjoyed it so she wants to repeat. The cuckolded husband has a huge Field advantage and can obviously still 'win' if he is willing to put in the work. Inertia is a very powerful motivation and there is a reason Talia chose him. He just needs to remember what it was. But again, friend of mine is a divorce lawyer. He says that what he sees the most is women usually with kids who are doing everything alone already. Working, taking care of the house, taking care of the kids, etc and the husband goes out with his mates on Thursday and expects sex. Lots of time sex that is completely one sided as the honeymoon phase is long gone and she is just going through the motions. One case he mentioned, the woman went out for a sunday lunch with friends, got home and her husband was cross at her, their 2yo was wailing non stop with hunger because he hadn't fed him because it was her "job" to do. Apparently he was shocked when he got served divorce papers. Can you imagine that?

Anyway, rant over ^^ this was an illustration of what I see our esteemed cuckold in this story being. A guy who has no concept of what a real relationship is and is probably unable to shift course.

Hey Ash, I enjoyed your story on the most part, the cliches not so much, I was maybe hoping that this being your first cuck story you would somehow write it differently, stay away from certain storylines, not follow all the characteristics of a typical cuck tale, make it totally yours.

But I guess there’s no getting around certain cuck truisms like the husband has to be small both in height and dick(and brain). Is terrible in bed, can’t get his wife off and blames her for not being exciting enough for him, has a low paying job, never advances position, watches too much porn and has kinks/fetishizes and never speaks of them to his wife until approx 7 years into the marriage. Seems to masterbate a lot, wears stained shorts and never folds his laundry! Somehow marries a very tall, big breasted, very intelligent, gorgeous beautiful woman and makes way more money than him. Okay enough.

One other small thing- you mentioned ‘slow burn’ so I assumed that there would be no erotic activity until ch 2, I thought you were going to expand on the relationship between husband and wife, how did Phil talk nina into this new lifestyle that awaits them in their future, I want to know what words he used to convince Nina to fuck the most handsomeness man with the biggest cock in a hotel room while being filmed by a porn star who is a collared pet/slave tattooed branded master calling woman .

Anyway I can’t wait for the next chapter and I rated your work with five Stars. Ignore the haters.

Dare

very hot story, please continue

Keep up the good work AA. Disregard the category police comments. Other than to shake your head and laughter at them. Can you imagine anything more pathetic than someone trolling a free story website having so much angst about where a story should go? I’d recommend therapy for them, but it’s probably too late.

Very clever, well written and entertaining.

Please keep writing!

Very good, a great plot handled well by a very talented author.

Couldn’t disagree more with the category police. Talia obviously loves her husband Phillip. The author explained it clearly. She is clearly a loving wife

I commented earlier on this piece then read your response to array of comments. Nice when authors respond. Wanted to follow up on part of your response and tried “Contact” option on profile page, but that does not always work. So decided to comment a second time: You captured perfectly what resonated about your piece when you said in response: “I’m writing the kind of story I like, where a man, through a combination of hubris and lack of awareness, seals his own fate. And where a woman discovers the joys of living more freely and casts aside the shackles of her "normal" life as she's corrupted.” Doing so is a creative challenge but so captivating/thought provoking when done well and you did. Thought the sex you depicted revealed/illuminated the characters and crux of the storyline — a mark of good erotic fiction. Some of Cagivagurl’s and Girlinthemoon’s pieces tackle in some ways the kind of story you are crafting as do the pieces by KitDeLuca164, the “Confession” series by suburbanne and the “Swim, Butterfly” series by MorraRose. Maybe you’ve read same. Simply want to say I enjoyed this piece as well as your succubus stories, glad you had fun writing it — I enjoyed reading it. Please continue.

To answer to the many posters asking the question as to why so many cuck stories are written is because PEOPLE KEEP READING THEM!

I love how even the supportive comments sound sarcastic. The amount of cognitive dissonance of the mentally deranged is fascinating ;)

I'm french and I'm 70 y.o. married to a 44 Y.O. woman and i'm now a cuck. She's fucked by some muslims and totally submissive to them. I really like thoose sort of story. I hope reading the following story quick..... I hope that damian's will take Talia deep in her ass and make her addicted like is my wife now.

Best Regards

loved it <3

Didn’t liked it, sue me.

All these sub-dom lifestyle characters are laughable in the real world and very often infantile, even in the fictional.

So what do we have here? A weak excuse of a man, a slut in disguise and two shady failures acting tough shit, looking like jokers in a naive cacophony of cliches and forced emotions through templates like squeezing a botched one in a fake cocktail.

Was the writing good? It’s the content that is to be valued. If not so, then Mein Kampf should still be in the bestseller list.

Would suggest to stay in familiar categories, this excursion was miserable.

Captcha

To the anon below me: You're an idiot. The tags are right there to check before you begin a story. If you don't like this kind of story, maybe don't fucking read them?

Big black clown cuck story definitely has the vermin. Squealing.

Curious where this is going to go.

Maybe I missed something, but where the fuck did , "fold the laundry", come from?

They were warned that big cock is addicting. And Philip is not keen with his own feelings on the matter.

Add to that the mystery of what happened instead of having to take a bus…

I see trouble on the way. Question is, will Philip be a pushover or stand his ground?

Loved it, corruption is such a hot thing abd for Talia that corruption is only just beginning

lololol,,the last sentence says it all!! he's a cucky!! an adult story written by a talented adult,,thank you!

Good story!

I keep coming back to this story, the build-up is fantastic. Looking forward to more chapters.