All Comments on 'The Birthday Club'

The story was very well put together, well developed and well told. I would like to see several more chapters to go with this one...do the mothers move in? Do the daughters join in? Does he get the mothers pregnant together? Does he get the daughters pregnant?

Keep it coming..

And not in a good way.

The main problem is the appallingly unrealistic dialogue. Nobody talks how these people talk. NOBODY,

I actually do speak in real sentences with real words. Sorry you didn't like it. Also sorry you post anonymously. Use your writing name so I can see your works, if you can come up with any.

What 18y old would ever call it residue.

Words I found cracked me up were, "portion" and "residue". Just found them so out of place.

Other than that great read, I like the "...and the story goes" type ending, liked that you didn't force an ending.

Thank you for the story.

Good story, the idea of a newly of age girl seeking out an older man, or the two just slowly falling for each other, is quite appealing. Would like to have seen Missy take a cream pie in her red haired snatch-after all, the magic of a redhead is her flaming bush-and not so much anal, but that's just me; I've never been a fan of anal.