The Boyfriend Pt. 04

IV: Hey, Dad

Blake

Blake took a deep breath as the DOC guard handed her back her ID and told her to step through the metal detector. She hesitated, panicking that she'd forgotten something before forcing herself to step through. Nothing happened.

It never had, not since her first visit almost two years ago.

She smiled at the next guard, who handed her the tray of quarters she'd brought, then ushered her through to the visiting area once she'd pocketed them, and swallowed a lump in her throat as she spotted her dad, dressed in a blue jumpsuit, sitting at one of the tables, his forearms resting on the surface.

Blake had to stop for a second and take a deep breath. She tried not to itch at her wig. Normally, she wouldn't have been able to wear it, since it was pretty close to the "hat" category, but her blue hair would have been considered inappropriate or inflammatory. So, they let her wear the dark brunette wig, and Blake had forgone any blue today, per regulations, opting for a hoodie and jeans. She'd left her overcoat in the car.

Blake walked over to the vending machine, first, and got two bags of cheetos, along with a snickers and a milky-way.

When she had those in her arms and turned toward the table, her dad was looking at her.

Her throat closed up for a moment, and Blake had to take a few deep breaths, eyes already hot, before she pushed herself forward.

"Hey, sweetie," her dad said as she sat down. He smiled so wide that his blue eyes danced.

"Hey, Dad."

He looked good. Much better than his first few months. He'd leaned out a bit, and his hair had gone grey at the temples and streaking his beard, but he still looked like her dad. He had the same crinkles around his mouth and at the corners of his eyes from smiling so much.

Seeing those made Blake's heart hurt. She hoped they never faded.

Blake pushed one of the bags of cheetos and the Snickers over to him.

"Thanks, Kiddo," he said, taking the cheetos and popping them open.

Blake didn't miss the way his hand twitched toward her, and her breath caught as she sniffed, wanting to take just his hand, just his finger, even. Anything to try and convey just how much she missed him, and how happy she was to see him again.

She didn't.

That was against the rules, and Blake didn't want anyone to have any reason to think her dad should stay here a second longer than his six-year sentence demanded.

"You look so beautiful," he breathed, "I swear--more every time I see you. You must be leaving a trail of girls and boys with broken hearts behind you at college."

Blake smiled at that. She didn't elaborate--she didn't want to talk about Liam, today; just her and her dad--but she smiled.

"Thanks, Dad. You look good, too."

He grinned, shrugging, "If there's anything good about being in here, it's that it's pretty conducive to getting in good shape. Maybe I'll take up a career in body-building when I get out."

Something slipped from Blake's lips that was half-sob, half-laugh, and her dad frowned.

"Oh, sweetie."

Blake gave her dad a tight smile as she drew in a deep, sniffling breath and wiped her eyes. She opened the Milky Way and took a bit to have a moment to collect herself. Her dad knew what she was doing. He could see it in his eyes. He didn't say anything, though, just let her collect herself.

"You shouldn't be in here."

The words slipped out, and her father's face fell.

"I'm sorry," she said, before he could say anything, "I know you don't like to argue. We shouldn't do that when we only have a few hours. I just--I miss you so much. Grandma and Grandpa are wonderful, but I could really use you right now. At home."

"I know, sweetie. It is my fault that I'm in here, though. And nothing is going to change that, unfortunately, so you need to make peace with that, okay? Even though it's awful and I miss being able to see you or at least call you every day since you're away at college."

He smiled, then, "How's that going? Still getting A's in everything? Did the roommate situation work out well."

"It's good. Really good. This semester was a bit harder, and I was a bit busier, but yeah, still getting A's in everything. I made some new friends, too. I--"

Blake sighed, "I'm sorry I didn't come back for the funeral. Grandma and Grandpa told me they understood, but I could have at least stood with--"

"No, you couldn't have, Blake."

She blinked, "You didn't go?"

He shook his head, frowning before he popped another cheeto into his mouth.

"Showing up there...I'm not too well-liked around here, still. I'll go visit her grave when I get out, but showing up there and needing to have a guard there..."

He sighed, "I just couldn't do it. People would have been thinking about me instead of your mom, and that would have ruined the day."

You should have gone. You should have gone there and made them remember that she's the one responsible for where you are.

Blake wanted to say it, but didn't It would just ruin her time with her dad.

She forcibly unclenched her jaw.

"I could have come visited you, at least."

He shook his head, "I know how you feel about her. And...you need to focus on school, Blake. On you. Not on someone like me. You're so smart and strong...you could be someone who really gets to enjoy life and do something you actually like for a living rather than just plugging away like the rest of us and hoping you make it to retirement with enough to still enjoy life."

Blake bit her lip, "Are you okay, though? With her gone?"

Her dad shrugged, "No, but not in any way you need to worry about."

He held up his left hand, flexing the fingers as he frowned at them, "It's a shame I'm not allowed to even wear my ring."

Blake took a deep breath. She needed to get off this topic before it broke something inside of her.

Normally, she'd talk about school or work, but she did not want her dad knowing how she made money or about the CRM she was working on, and she couldn't really talk about the rest of her year or anything like that without talking about Liam. She didn't want to tell her dad about him until she told Liam about her dad, and she just wasn't ready for that yet.

Popping open her bag of cheetos, Blake forced a smile.

"Do you remember where we left off when I was telling you about Game of Thrones? Or do you want me to tell you about the latest super hero movies?"

Her father smiled at that. They had TV, but not HBO, and didn't really get access to Marvel or Star Wars stuff because of one of the stupid licensing restrictions.

The first time Blake had told him about Game of Thrones, he'd apparently told some of the other inmates the story, and it had made him a bit more popular. Since then, part of their visits each time had been Blake telling him about the last episode or movie she'd watched since she'd been to visit.

"I think we left off at the Red Wedding, and you were going to tell me what happened next in the books, since you said this was where they started to branch off a bit more."

Blake grinned, energized by the excitement in her father's eyes, and launched into the story.

***

About two hours later, Blake got back into her car and squeezed her eyes shut as she hugged her legs to her chest on the driver's seat. It was cold, but she didn't care enough to turn the car on at the moment.

It was like this every time. She'd thought it would get easier after a few years, but...

Blake took a deep breath and looked up at the big, blocky DOC facility.

He doesn't deserve to be there, and I can't do anything to get him out.

Her dad had pleaded guilty, even though it wasn't his fault, and his six-year sentence did not include any chance of parole.

Biting her lip hard, Blake wrenched her view away from the building. She started up the car and drove away as carefully and cautiously as she could, following all the rules.

Once she was far enough away that her heart had stopped pounding and the tightness in her chest had abated somewhat, she called Liam.

He picked up after the first ring.

"Hey!"

The warmth in his voice, the smile Blake could hear, melted her insides and brought a genuine smile to her lips even as it made her eyes hot.

"Hey," she said, then bit her lip. She hadn't even been able to say that one word without her voice breaking.

"Blake? What's wrong?"

She thought of telling him everything was fine. She still wasn't ready to tell him about her dad, yet, but...

I don't want either of us to give each other bullshit answers like that.

"Being home is just...hard, sometimes," she said, making sure to concentrate on the road. She normally tried to even avoid talking on the phone while driving, but she'd needed to talk to Liam.

"I wish I could help."

She smiled, "You already are."

Blake bit her lip, "I'm really happy I have you. I miss you a lot, but I'm really happy I can just call you like this."

"Me, too. Are you doing anything right now?"

"Just driving home for another forty-five minutes or so. I'm busy later tonight, but I'm--I just needed to hear you. I really wish you could be here to hug me right now."

"I can't do that, as much as I'd like to, but...maybe I could talk to you until you get home?"

Blake smiled, "Deal. So how was dinner last night?"

Liam sighed, and Blake laughed as he started relaying his interrogation.

A/N: So, yeah...Blake has it rough. Does it make a bit more sense now that she's kept very closed-mouthed about her family life with Liam? Let me know what you think! And what you'd want to see with Blake and her dad. I'll see if I can work it in <3