The Boyfriend Pt. 25

XXV: Therapy?

Blake and Liam

Blake

"Blake? Kiddo? Are you there, are you okay?"

Hearing her dad's voice made Blake smile, even if it was laced with concern--he knew how expensive it was to call and had told them not to do it unless they really needed to or couldn't visit.

"Hey, Dad. I'm fine. I mean--I'm needed to talk to you about something because I'm not fine, but I'm safe and everything, just in my room at Grandma and Grandpa's. They want to talk to you when I'm done, by the way."

"Okay. What's up? I'll help however I can."

Blake's smile widened as her dad's tone relaxed, even as his words tugged at her heart.

"Grandma and Grandpa just showed me the will."

Silence for a moment. Then:

"Oh."

Blake sighed, "Yeah. I take it you know what it says?"

"More or less."

Blake had to swallow and take a deep breath before she could force the words out.

"I don't want it."

"Blake--"

"I know I should," she said, quickly, cutting him off, "But I just...It feels like this is just another way of her messing with me even when she's gone."

Blake clenched her teeth as she heard her dad's sigh on the other side of the phone.

"I know you have issues with your mother, Blake," her dad said, tone calm, but firm, "But she loved you. This should prove that to you, if anything."

Blake tried to take in a deep breath, and almost couldn't without a little sob escaping. When had her eyes grown so hot?

Fuck. I hate how she can make me like this in just a few fucking seconds.

"She stopped showing it," Blake forced out, trying to keep the anger from her voice, "Love isn't just pulling some stupid grand gesture after you fuck up. It's doing the little things every day and being consistent. And I know it's fucking hard, but you did it. For both of us. Even when she was awful to you. She--"

Blake cut herself off with a half-sob before her voice could grow too ragged.

The line was silent for a few seconds before her dad spoke again.

"And you're gonna let her take up valuable time on a call instead of what you really wanted to talk about?"

Blake almost laughed. And almost cried. But she fought to keep her tears at bay.

This day fucking sucks, but he can still make it a little bit better. Even from prison.

"I called because I need your advice," Blake said, after a few deep breaths, voice still wavering, but not as raw as before, "I know the money would help, but I don't need it. I have a job, and I'm putting myself through school, and it's hard work, but I like it and I'm proud of it. After she--"

Blake stopped herself, taking a deep breath.

He's right. I'm not going to let her take up any of this time.

"I don't know what to do, Dad. I need you. I need your help."

Her dad sighed, "I love you, Kiddo. I think you know what the smart choice is. You're too bright not to. I know better than to tell my daughter to do something just because I think it's the right thing, but don't let your pride get in the way of setting yourself up for a life where you don't need to work as much. I loved my job, and I'd give anything to be able to go back to work, but even when I was working, I would have given anything to only need to take the jobs I wanted, so that instead of working, I could be spending time with you and your mom and my parents. Maybe--"

He paused, "Maybe you should see a therapist. I had to see one in here, and...well, it helped me a lot."

Blake frowned...why hadn't she thought of that?

Because I have no money? Fuck...I don't even have health insurance anymore, do I?

"I know they're expensive," her dad said, as though he could read her mind, "But maybe just take enough of the money to pay for that. And health insurance. Make your mom pay to help unravel all the messed up stuff between the two of you. That's something you could wrap your head around, right?"

Blake bit her lip, then nodded, "I'll think about it, Dad."

She looked down at the timer she had running on her phone, "Thank you, Dad. I--I think this was what I needed. Do you want to talk to Grandma and Grandpa, now?"

"Of course. I love you, Kiddo. I'm glad I was able to help. Even if it was just to put an idea into your head."

Blake smiled. The heat had returned to her eyes, but she didn't care this time, "I love you, too, Dad. I miss you. So much."

"Me, too, Kiddo."

With a deep, shaky breath, Blake disconnected her headphones and walked out of the room to where her grandparents sat near the kitchen. She handed them her phone, then walked back and closed the door behind her. She sat down on the edge of her bed.

A part of her had wanted to stay and talk with them, but she needed to think.

Her dad had brought up a few annoyingly good points.

Therapy does exist for a reason.

She'd been forced to go to a few sessions when she was in high school just after her dad had gone to prison, since she'd been "acting out," but those sessions hadn't done anything. Blake had been too angry and sad and every other shitty emotion, then, and had just said what she'd needed to in order to make the sessions stop.

Would it be like that again?

She knew she was at least somewhat smarter and less emotional now than she'd been then, but...

Would therapy bring that side of me back out?

Just talking about her mom was usually enough to turn on her bitch-mode. Or make her depressed. Or self-loathing.

Squeezing her eyes shut, Blake took a deep breath.

There was one more person she could ask. Someone she really should have talked with about this already, but...

Blake blinked, then hung her head, pressing the heels of her hands into her brow.

Fuck, if just the thought of telling Liam about my life makes me that afraid...

Then her dad was probably right.

She wanted to be with Liam, and she needed to learn how to open up to him.

And that's literally what therapists are there for.

With a sigh, Blake rose from her bed and found her computer, opening it up.

Before she did anything, she needed to figure out if she had health insurance, still, and if not, what the fuck to do about it.

***

Liam

"So, still think I'm a moron?"

Liam and Kekoa had finished their meals by now, the only thing left the wrappers and boxes in the paper bag all of it had come in.

Kekoa shrugged, "Yeah, but that's not gonna changed based on who you're with."

Liam snorted, rolling his eyes at his brother, but felt himself smiling. Telling Kekoa how he and Blake had come to be together, and watching Kekoa's face as he did so, had made him feel better.

Not just about Kekoa's opinion on everything, but about his own security in things with Blake.

If he was honest with himself, he had been developing feelings for Blake for a while before he broke up with Marie, but as great as he and Marie had felt when starting out, that hadn't been working out. And things with Blake had felt far better even when they were just friends.

"Seriously," Liam said, "Am I crazy for dating her, or is she as great as I think she is?"

Kekoa smiled, "Well, I wouldn't know the second part, because I've never actually met her, but...are you happy?"

Liam nodded, smiling, "Yeah."

"And she's a big part of that?"

"She is."

"And it sounds like she made sure you were aware of all the potential hang-ups and everything that you'd have to deal with since she's..." Kekoa cleared his throat, cheeks darkening, "You know."

Liam smirked at his brother, "A camgirl. You can say it--it's not like it's an insult."

"I know. I still haven't entirely wrapped my head around the fact that you, Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes religious boy, are dating a camgirl. And apparently really fucking confident about it with no self loathing or moral quandaries."

Liam laughed, "Not so religious any more, since I'm not having it pelted at me every day. I think it helps that she's just Blake, to me. Even though I can just pull up a browser window and pull up her shows."

He paused then, and eyed his brother, "You realize I'll have to kill you if you ever watch any of her shows or anything now, though, right?"

Kekoa raised an eyebrow, "What happened to being cool with it?"

"Doesn't mean my brother's allowed to look at my naked girlfriend."

Kekoa snorted, "Fair enough."

Liam smiled, then bit his lip, frowning.

"What?"

Liam sighed, "You don't think I have to worry about Blake being a rebound, right? I really like her. I want to make sure I still feel that way a few months down the line."

"The whole 'rebound' thing only happens if you think of her like one, Liam," Kekoa said, "And you're not the type of person that thinks that way. If you want to be with her, treat her like she's someone you want to be with a few months or years down the line."

"I didn't--"

Kekoa shot him a look, "You didn't have to. You're you. I know you're always thinking long term about something. Just make an actual effort and you'll probably be far better off than most people."

Smiling, Liam nodded.

Then he took a deep breath, "I do have one more thing I need help with."

Kekoa cocked his head.

"How do I make sure our family never finds out what she does? Cuz that's just never a conversation I even want to approach."

Kekoa threw his head back and laughed.

A/N: Looks like things are hopefully going to go a bit better for these two. Do you think it will? Or that they're being a bit too optimistic?