The Boyfriend Pt. 65

The Boyfriend Part LXV: Understanding

Blake

Liam called before Blake had the chance to call him first.

"Hi," she said, unable to hold back the relief that flooded her voice, "Liam, I—"

"Blake, just give me a moment? I'll let you talk, but I need to say something first period I just need you to listen to it and not say anything until I'm done. Okay?"

Blakes swallowed, throat growing tight at the seriousness in his tone, but nodded, even though he couldn't see, "Okay. Go ahead."

She heard Liam's deep breath through the phone before he spoke.

"I was a dick the other night. I called you up because I wanted to talk with you about something, and I chickened out about it. I thought I was ready, but I was wrong. And... I'm still not ready. I accused you of holding back, but I'm the one that was doing that. And I'm sorry for that. I don't—"

Liam cut off, and the pain in his voice as he continued tugged at Blake's heart.

"It just hurts. A lot. I know that what you shared with me about your mom hurt a lot, too. And you're a stronger person than I am for doing that. I just need you to be patient with me on this, okay? You could ask some of my friends, and they would probably tell you, but I'd rather it came from me when I'm ready. And I'm sorry about the Cherry thing. I know that you're her as much as you are yourself, and it was really shitty for me to call you cherry just because you were deflecting by flirting with me. I know that it's hypocritical, considering what I just asked you, but I want you to feel like you can share things with me if they're weighing on you. I want to make sure we find a way to communicate better. I know that part of it is just being so far away from each other, and being busier than usual in a weird way, but I want to make sure that doing things like that doesn't put a strain on us going forward. And I think it will just make things better for us in—shit, sorry. I know I'm rambling. I'm just nervous because you haven't said anything, even though I asked you not to say anything. I—"

Blake almost laughed as Liam took a quick but deep breath, "Look, I just called to say that I'm sorry for holding things back with you, and that I accept and want all parts of you. Cherry, Blake, and anyone else you haven't told me about. That would be fun if they come with a cool hair color, too."

Blake laughed at that, smiling so hard her cheeks hurt.

"Can you forgive me for being a dick?"

"If you can forgive me for being an asshole. You were a dick, but a small one. I was a bigger asshole."

She could hear the smile on his lips as he spoke, "I miss you so much. I'm sorry I haven't really been fair about sharing things. That I still can't really be fair about it yet. I just—"

"I understand, Liam. If anyone understands, it's me."

"Thank you, Blake. You don't know how much that means to me."

"I might have some idea. And I miss you too. Way more than you miss me."

Blake took a deep breath after that as Liam laughed, and her expression sobered as she remembered what she'd wanted to say to him.

"Are you doing better?" he asked, before she could say anything, "With your nose, I mean. You haven't sneezed yet."

Blake did smile at that, "Cold meds, my grandma's soup, grandpa's bone broth, orange juice, superfood smoothies apparently are like a strike team if you put them all together to fight a cold. I think the only solid foods I've eaten since my grandma caught me sneezing have been the snacks, I've been able to sneak."

Liam laughed at that, and Blake almost lost her nerve. She took a deep breath though, and continued before he could say anything else.

"As for the other part of me being okay... I'm still not doing that well, but better. And I do want to talk to you about it. And not just because of what you said. I was actually about to call you right when you called me."

The line was silent for just a moment before Liam spoke, "Go ahead. I'm listening."

Blake swallowed, then took a few deep breaths.

"My dad is in jail. In prison. He's been there since I was in high school and he's going to be there for a while before he's even up for parole. That's why I live with my grandparents. He—"

Blake had to pause for a moment, sniffing and trying to collect herself. Her eyes were hot, but she didn't let herself cry. She needed to tell Liam everything without being a blubbering mess.

"He and my mom had a fight one night. One bad enough that he needed to leave the house, so he got in his car. But it was after dinner, so they'd each had something to drink. He was barely over the legal limit, but..."

Her voice finally broke, "He got into an accident, and the other driver died. It was a kid I went to high school with. So, he was sentenced vehicular manslaughter."

She took a deep breath that sounded far too much like a sob.

"He's not a bad person. He's not a drunk, and it was my mom's fault that he even left the house. I tried to tell them that, but they didn't care. She and everyone else blamed him for everything, even though it was her fault. My grandparents and I were the only people in the town that didn't hate him for it. I thought that my ex understood, too. But looking back, I don't know if that was just to manipulate me or not. I don't know if he really ever cared. And I went to school with the girl, so everyone there knew. It was a miracle I kept my grades up. I didn't want to do anything with anyone except Jamie and then after him, I didn't really have anything else to do but study and play games by myself. That's why I'm fucked up. That's why I didn't go home over the summer, and why I stayed over Thanksgiving. It's why I had to find a way to make money. My dad's job—he was a contractor—brought in the most money, and last year, my mom just decided she didn't want to pay for school anymore, so I was on my own."

Blake's voice was raw by the time she finally stopped. A few tears had rolled down her cheeks, but she wasn't blubbering, which she considered a win. She did have to reach over and blow her nose, but after that... she knew it was the next part that might break her, and her hand went to the Pearl at her throat. The one she'd started wearing the moment she decided she would make up with Liam, whatever it took. The moment her dad had said...

Blake shook her head and took another deep breath.

"That's what I've been dealing with. what I haven't told you. I've been trying to do some stuff with the estate to make sure that he's taken care of when he gets out, but doing everything by myself is hard. I'm good at the research, but there's just so much of it, and it's all really confusing and I don't want to make the wrong decision. And then I saw her parents the other day and it just fucked me up so much, and... I understand if this is too much for you. I know just dating a Cam girl is already a lot without all this shit piled on—"

"Blake."

She went silent, swallowing the lump in her throat, gripping that Pearl tight.

"Everyone has complicated shit to deal with in their life. It's all just different flavors of the same thing. The situation with your dad—everything you just told me—it doesn't make me want you any less. Honestly, that you're working so hard to help him out makes you even more amazing. You sharing this with me it just makes me feel like I mean more to you. That you feel safe enough with me to share this."

" It doesn't make you think any less of me?"

She hadn't wanted to ask it, but she was putting so much effort into holding it together, that her insecurity slipped through.

"God, no, Blake. It just makes me understand why you didn't want to share that, and why sometimes you just might not want to share things or might need to just be in your own head. And I get that."

"So, we are still good? We're still together, and you still can't wait to see me?"

"Of course. I don't really think there's anything at this point that could change that."

Blake no longer tried to hold back her tears. She was smiling too much. She just wished Liam could be here to kiss them away.

"I got your present, by the way. It's perfect."

"I'm glad you like it. I didn't know if it would be too much or—"

"It's one of the most amazing gifts anyone's ever gotten me. I fucking cried after I read the card that came with it."

"Was that before or after—"

"After."

"Ah. Sorry about that. Again."

"I think we should just move on from that. No more apologizing about it."

"I think I can work with that."

"Did you get my present?"

Liam laughed, "That's actually part of what I'd wanted to talk to you about last time. I think it's better than what I got you. Or, at least it's the most me present that anyone's ever gotten me."

Blake beamed. Her heart was so full that it felt like it might burst from her chest.

"I'm really glad to hear that."

They fell into easy conversation after that, and as Blake smiled and laughed and choked up a few times as she spoke with her boyfriend after what felt like ages of silence, she felt the tensions start to leak from her with every passing second. She thought about what her dad had said about Liam, and as much as Blake would miss being able to see her dad, she couldn't wait for break to be over so she could see Liam again.

A/N: This is the final chapter of them being on break, so I hope you dudes are ready for all the longing and tension and all that good stuff to explode into a hot, steamy, sexy (probably sticky) mess!