The Center of Retention

It was really great being the center of attention. Still is. Trick is you have to hold off, make sure everybody else is getting theirs, and then only occasionally get your turn. Nobody wants a selfish center.

So, two weeks out of the month, we'd play house. I'd get home before the girls, so I would usually cook. They'd get in late and then would usually trade off nights who got to be with me. One way or the other, I got pussy every night of the week. I just couldn't allow myself to come. Sometimes they would both be at the same time, when they wanted to give me a thrill. But they tended to get too jealous, and I didn't encourage it. Noelle came up to me one night, all upset, and finally broke down and told me her and Doc had fooled around at the office after work recently. I couldn't really get that mad, considering. So, we just agreed to keep everything above board and honest. Things got better after that. When April had the kids, sometimes Noelle and I would have some evenings alone. Sometimes she would peel off a lunchtime quickie at work with her boss. That gave me a night off and made it easier for me to retain, so fine by me. Then when we played house, I got sex night after night by two hot girlfriends fighting over who could make me come the hardest. Also fine by me.

So yeah, life was pretty sweet before the Troubles. I forget who said it, but the quote was "I do not know what weapons the Third World War will be fought with, but I know the Fourth will be fought with clubs and spears." That fool didn't have Star Dome, I guess. Throw some missiles at me, motherfucker. See what happens. The three of us were a thing until we lost April to SINOVID-28. Never did find out what happened to Noelle. After 3 and the Long Winter I spent a year and a half away from home sorting out assholes. I mean, how chickenshit you have to be to wait for the Plagues AND a fucking nuclear war before you decide to secede? Fucking clowns saw too many movies. When I came back, I found that Northtown had seen some heavy fighting. Our apartment building had been burned to the ground. No sign of her. Hard times back then. That was one of the worst parts, not the folks you lost to the fighting or starving, but they were just... gone. No idea what ever happened. I've run search bots over the years looking for her, but no dice. Of course, without the Troubles, I wouldn't have met Kate and Lil and Bhavna. Life is good now, real good.

Speaking of, smells like short stuff's got the turkey out. They'll be calling us in for grace soon. You think that's enough content for your blog? Sorry, your SimDim? We just called you guys content providers back in the day. Good thing you're my favorite grandson, I wouldn't tell this shit to just anybody. So, when you get it all rendered and CGI'ed into a story, I get to see it, right? Wizard. Yeah, I guess it's been an interesting life. Good enough to make a Simulated movie. Beat all four Plagues. Beat the Long Winter. Beat getting shot and getting cancer. In fact, I guess I'm the oldest guy I know. That's why everybody's all pluralled up now. My generation lost so many men to the Troubles, chicks outnumbered us like two to one. Real men like us are even rarer. Fine by me. I know how to handle being the center of retention. Get it? Fuck you, that was funny. Let's eat.