All Comments on 'The Denouement'

Very good !!! Clever use of scene setting.

Brilliant! 5 solid stars!

I'll admit I didn't get it. Thanks for tipping off us slow folks. 🤣

Nice swerve at the end.

Stupid

A lovely little story

Nice.

Nice twist. I was wondering how a photo of two people talking would be proof of an affair.

Loved it

A smart and different "trap-story": 5* !

That is EXACTLY what a 750 word effort is supposed to look like!

.

5 *****

I read the explanation and the ending several times and I’m still not clear what happened.

Good story, nice ending did not see it coming. Thanks for writing. 5⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Fell apart. Probably needed about 1,000 words to pull it off. How can you tell? The author had to explain himself after the end of story

Put me in the class of those dumb idiots who don't get it, but perhaps there's a reason? Promises made to never ask, to never pop the question, because women who have steady boyfriends, ones which they love, would NEVER want to hear that. Yep, don't get it.

OK, but wtf did he promise his parents?

I was, apparently my mistake, with the impression that all stories were to be in English. Is this not a requirement??

It's pretty obvious that you have no earthly idea what the word 'eponymous' means, or how to use it in a sentence.

Contrived bullshit

You wrote a very short story and then felt the need to explain it. That shows very little confidence in your story telling skills.

Nicely done !

5/5

OK, great fake-out, and 750 too. Well played!

I understand that you put the story in the wrong category to mislead people, but I don't agree with it.

Boy, you've managed to make the anons' single, shared brain cell melt down. How delicious.

Clever

I very much appreciate this effort to deke the readers, but there was one piece of dialogue that I think didn't make sense in the context of what was *really* happening and only made sense in the context of an affair about to be made public.

*

Sarah's whispered voice was earnest.

"We have to tell them. They're going to figure it out, soon enough. It can't stay like this."

*

Who is the "they" here? Rob already knows. Jeremy's parents? Why wouldn't they know about the planned proposal, and even if they didn't, why would it be the big terrible secret that is being implied in this exchange (as well as the next exchange, where Sarah says she'll handle Jeremy's parents. Why do they even need to be "handled"?).

Not even a story if you have to explain it afterwards! Waste of time.

Took a minute, but I caught it. Good story.

Clever lad.

Hardy,

I suspect he was just being kind to the stupid people. So Hardy, is it difficult to sit down with that stick up there?

I thought it was a great misdirection that had me fooled until the end, and left me smiling.

You had me in the first half, I’m not gonna lie

Punking the reader, how clever. I feel so special. Do you feel special?

The plot could have been written better!

@ImNotanAnon - Wow, your insight is just as intelligent as your fake name. On that note, I'll just point out that using a fake name doesn't stop you from being just some anonymous person on the Internet. It simply means that your anonymous comments can be separated from the other anonymous comments and grouped together.

Nice idea, but the execution of this needs to be flawless if it’s going to work, and this wasn’t. Red herrings are fine, but you can’t put complete misdirection in and not annoy your audience

I gave it a five for the misdirection alone. Got me RW, good one.

I liked it!

5

In some stories and movies, the author will use something called “ disappointed expectation”. Basically, it means building the story to a point where you feel something bad is going to happen, and then you go in an opposite direction. Think of a teen opening a door you know a chainsaw wheeling assailant is behind, only to get her called away by someone at the last second. This works, because the person watching the movie of reading the story, already has witnessed the killer in action, so it’s believable. In this example, and the “ I shot the sheriff” story, the author believes it, because HE is aware of the characters, and how he expects them to act. In my opinion, both stories do not work with the “ disappointed expectation” , because the writer does not have the time to get the readers understanding of the characters and the buy in, to what is happening. When you need to explain your story line after the fact, it does not work. I offer this up, as constructive criticism.

Just reread this, still a fun little read. You were dead on with the "I don't get it" comments, but they are not quite as bad as the "finish the story" crowd. Some folks have no imagination and can not follow a line of thought to a logical conclusion. An extremely short story is sometimes just an ACT in a larger play, like seeing an auto accident as you walked to the store. You describe the accident and some want to know what you bought at the store, what kind of shoes were you wearing, and why didn't you tell us the name of the street.

RW, I thought this one deserved a higher score. Thanks for sharing.

VERY CLEVER 💥💥💥💥💥💫💫💫💥💥💯💥💥

I agree with Dreddras’s comment. Dialogue inconsistent with scenario.