by charliewilder
This story is so very intriguing ! It has elements of a sci-fi novel not unlike Robert Heinlein . After reading James Clavell's - Tai-Pan and Nobel House the references to Hong Kong add nuances to the story as well . Needless to say .... More Please!
Cheers from Frederick , Md. -USA
and as I am familiar with the concept of magic in dreams, I can suspend both my disbelief and quite a few of the normal limits.
However, you are setting some high expectations for this story, and serving it up in such small slices. I'm concerned that the way you are telling this story won't do damage to your narrative. For example, everything you presented thus far could easily have fit in one introductory chapter.
However, if he does not ask, nor get told about the other man - and what she did with her things, then you are going to risk losing your audience for building up and then leaving red herrings like that for us to trip over, heedless of our abused curiosities.