All Comments on 'The Gift'

One of the best dad/daughter stories I have read in Literotica. I'm looking forward to more of this dynamic duo in the future.

This story was great! Defiantly got me off! Good job!

Maybe the daughters friend / s could be envoled while she is pregnant so many possibilities

Sorry, but a pregnancy test doesn't work that fast...!! Otherwise good story with a good plot. You have to do better research on pregnancy tests.

She was taking all those science courses and genetics but too stupid to know when to take a pregnancy test!?!?!? Average ovulation is 14 days past start of period. You wont get a positive test until 6-12 days after ovulation after implantation

While I appreciate the criticisms, please keep in mind that this is ONLY fiction. What's more is that it's EROTIC fiction. The intent of the story is titillate and excite the libido and imagination. Try to check ye olde brain at the door and ENJOY the story with your id at the forefront and push that ego, so concerned with validation and assurance, to the back. I know how menstrual cycles work; I also know that I was writing a short story and didn't want to go through whole weeks of this stuff, so I used some license to KEEP the story short. I'm terribly sorry if that prevented any of you from enjoying a fun, sexy, fantasy-driven story. But if you find that you're looking for something more fact-based, there's a lot of anatomy books you're welcome to go read. They're a bit droll and have absolutely no story, but they certainly won't wander away from the all-important science of biology.

If you're going to write a daddy/daughter story, this is definitely the way to do it; hot, sexy, cheeky, sperm-soaked, and with just enough unreality to make the fantasy work. All the biology nerds need to go away and read something less heated, as they obviously derived no entertainment from this story. Remember, science-nerds, this is a STORY, a fantasy where things work the way the author wants them to, not necessarily how the real-world works; if you don't get that, you're in the wrong place; you want reality? Watch CNN. A good erotic story like this should make you want to open your pants and play a little; if all it does is make you want to open your text books, then life is too good for you, and you should go back to living with the rest of the goats, there's no hope for you in the human world.

Five stars, my friend, I enjoyed this foray out of my comfort-zone immensely, you may just have made a convert out of me.

Soooo hot!!! Glad your back and writing stories :). This one made me so wet before i came! Wish my daddy would do this to me ;)

I mean, if I could accept that two of my friends were committing incest, why couldn't I accept the possibility for myself?--Who are the friends? the story mentions them twice but leaves out the connection.

i loved it and i would love to see more of your work!!!!

I really liked this one, especially the girl's frankness and confidence in herself. She guided the action and gave a wonderful gift to her father. Well done, nightshadow.

Thank you,

Love,

Sarabeth

The only problem is, nightshadow, that mentioning taking pregnancy tests 3 minutes after intercourse is so factually incorrect as to be distracting from the otherwise good story. Unfortunately, there's no way to tell so soon if one is with child. The only logical thing would be to try to inseminate as many times as possible during the fertile period. But that doesn't mesh with using the lack of conception as a device to get Daddy to keep trying initially. I suppose it could be written so that she has to plead with him to breed her as many times as possible before the fertile window ends? ~shrug~ Nice story, other than that very distracting detail! :)

You should make a part 2.

Great job. Part 2?

Well I would really like to hear if daddy and daughter took it to the next level! EXCLUSIVENESS?

I added my previous comments without reading other comments. But I have to agree with Kailie_elise, it did detract from the story where Natalie took the test right after being with her father and expected the results to show her pregnant, it just doesn't happen that fast!

her dad mentioned her mothers problem with trying for a second baby and then she mentioned coming from a long line of fertile women, claiming that getting pregnant wouldn't be too difficult. however both her mother or father could have been responsible for those problems and now he is involved with her. ??? also i would have preferred a confession of her fathers secret lust for her or something. it started to seem more like she was taking advantage of him in his emotional state.

What a champion li'l slut she was.

She obviously loved her 'old man' and gave up a hell of a lot for him.

Definitely a 5* job for me.

In my opinion, a sequel to this story is an absolute MUST!

Your stories are well written and arousing, please continue making them! :)

The story is written precisely, exactly and to the full dimensions of everything I desire in a father and daughter's incest story, from the culmination of consummated sexual incest and procreation pregnancy, through to them comitting to a life of incestual bliss and happiness! This story fulfills my every tantasy and hopefullness of the incest genre and the gamut from being plutonic father and daughter to love and romance to full intercourse and the impregnating of the female.

Good father and daughter blood-related incest stories are extrememly hard to find, in particular where there is pure love and romance, respect and adoration, and the ultimate risk and sacrifice to make their lives complete, the want of pregnancy and making a baby, making lots of babies!! Natalie's father is very reluctant, but I give him accolades for making sure they in general, and Natalie in particular, are positive of their life-altering decisions.

This story is awesome, very realistic as any father and daughter's incestual love affair can and should be, especially because there is no outside influences of threesomes, moresomes nor friends, etc., to muck up, muddy and fuck up their affair with stroke fucking just to sate the lust of some readers. There's plenty of smut and slut fucking storieselsewhere, using incest as the teaser!! Nothing fucking pisses me off as much as stroke stories using the beauty of incest as a teaser!!

Nightshadow, you have given me hope there is still some writer's that are capable of putting together how a pure and sensual, romantic with love and devotion of the male and female couple should be written!! The writing is great, the theme and context is presented in the highest possible standard of integrity. Your feelings of compassion and expressing great dialogue with intimate feelings of the characters; their roles are magnificent, well written and spoken. The details are quality, the introduction is topnotch and thorough, and the story content is awesome!! Keep on doing what you're doing! Accolades for a top performance!!

Great story... thanks for sharing

Hey there!

I don't comment on stories as often as I should, but I just wanted to let you know, holy shit this was hot. I love the dept to the characters, the personality you gave them, the frank description of everything. It's a well-crafted piece, and I don't mind saying that my only complete is that it's a stand alone story, so now that I've finished, it's done!

Thank you for writing this and sharing it with us; you did good.

--LE

and much of the "information" dispensed was wrong.

as others have already pointed out, a home pregnancy test does not give a reading the morning after. not even the week after.

the language used was clipped, formal, and stilted.

Wow this might just be the best story i have ever read on here, atleast it's in top 3.

Loved it!

Loved the story! The daughter rocked!! Daddy was a whiny-assed pathetic loser that needs to grow a pair... Well he could borrow hers, since its obvious she has it going on, lol! Gawd, if she wasn't so motivated she would have gotten nauseous over how sickeningly pathetic he was. How many times does she have to shake her ass and bare pussy at him and beg to be fucked? Lol

...anyway, still loved the story!

Excellent story! I got two daughters(19) & (20) and I knocked both of them up. Now it makes me want to do it a second time. I think they might be ready for another, I know I am. I knocked up my sister and got my daughters, now I am daddy to y i

I want to fuck my adult daughter so fucking bad.

Loved the overall story arc and was certainly VERY well written. However in response to "check your brain at the door" I can only speak for myself but my brain is what makes this fantasy even possible from start to finish.The only things i didn't like were the swearing/ crass nature of the dialouge between the 2 characters during sex, it diminished the loving/ caregiver attitude which set everything in motion from the begging. Had you left the tone as such, having them achieve the impregnation goal through love and closeness would have REALLY hit home. Keep on writing though for you CERTANLY have talent!!!

Whilwe I echo some of the other comments here, I tend to look not only at the tone, plot, characterization, and other artistic elements of a story but also at the mechanics. I have difficulty awarding 5 stars to a work whose author lacks the humility to admit an inability to edit/proofread his/her writing and instead insists on proving that he/she lacks that ability.

before her death, Mom had made some very smart financial investments early in her life (I AM IMPRESSED TO FIND OUT THAT SHE MADE INVESTMENTS B E F O R E SHE DIED, EARLY IN HER LIFE!!!! I WOULD BE SHOCKED IF SHE MADE THE INVESTMENTS A F T E R SHE DIED, LATER IN LIFE!!!!)

Spring (spring) (2)

Sweetheart (sweetheart) (10)

Down's Syndrome (syndrome)

Devil's Advocate (devil's advocate)

Society's (society's)

over stimulated (overstimulated)

MORE than my father could handle ANY MORE (anymore) (2)

between my father and I (me) (YOU MEAN IT DIDN’T JUST HAPPEN TO I????)

up-take (uptake)

A perfect gift in a wonderful fantasy land... this was deep, passionate and lovely!

If I were her dad, I would want to MARRY her and have lots of kids!!! LOVED IT!!!

This is a great story. I thought the inner conflict the daughter was having at first was really good. This story definitely hits on my own fantasy about my daughter.

I’m not sure why so many writers on here do this but I feel like it needs to be addressed everytime I see it. However, this is the first time I’m addressing it. Penises cannot and will never be able to go past the cervix to deposit sperm directly into the uterus. It can’t happen. The cervix only dialates for one thing; birth. Sperm has to go through cerivical mucus to clean of seminal fluid before it can enter the uterus. If seminal fluid gets into the uterus it would cause horrible pain, cramping and infection. This was a great story with two major flaws(pregnancy test thing). If those flaws weren’t there, I’m sure you would have won that contest.

everyone knows that a preg test won't show within hours, let alone the next day, after sex... kind of cheezy there.

Wow

I see why there is so much bad sex...men have no clue about women's body...if that was fixed this would be one of the best stories..

A daddy's forbidden dream! lovely!

I enjoy the story, but the father being so slow to pick up on things combined with the stupidity of checking for pregnancy the day after sex is just too annoying. 4/10.

Please do some research! This has potential but my Goddess learn about ovulation! No one is going to be able to tell they are pregnant hours after sex! It takes AT LEAST 10+ days to be absolutely sure. Rewrite this after you learn more and i can give it the 5 stars i want to.

Loved it 5 Stars.

Just wish it was longer

Please learn about female anatomy!

1. The penis CANNOT penetrate the cervix during intercourse.

2. Ovulation lasts a couple days, usually 2 weeks from start of menstruation.

3. Pregnancy tests cannot detect pregnancy hormones until first day of missed period at earliest.

Couldn't give 5 stars if I wanted to.

Good story except for one glaring fact: you clearly have NO idea how those pregnancy tests work.

What they do is look for specific hormones that are produced by a woman's body upon conception... BUT, it takes a MINIMUM of a week (usually more like 3-6 weeks) AFTER conception before her body produces them in sufficient quantities for them to show up on a test. And that is even on tests an actual doctor will use to check (which are far more reliable/accurate than home kits).

As for the cervix penetration thing; I know that there were a couple girls I fucked back in the day that there was *something* deep inside of their pussies that would squeeze the head of my dick making it sorta *pop* in and out of her as we fucked. And while I'm not OMG huge (roughly 7-1/2" to 8"... I really have never measured it), it was deep enough to where on other women they complained I was "hitting something" which I always assumed to be their cervix.

As many others have mentioned, this story is filled with errors about anatomy, physiology, and genetics. If you don't know these things for sure, don't include them in your story; getting them wrong is just going to pull a lot of your readers out of the world of fiction.