The Girl in His Reflection Ch. 03

'You gave me a girlfriend,' Jules said, struggling not to laugh. 'And then, you basically ask me if you can fuck me.'

'Not you-' Ben starts, before stopping himself. 'I mean, fuck, dude I don't know.'

'Unbelievable,' Jules said. 'I show you my tits, and this is how you repay me?'

Then, Ben's eyes narrowed on him. 'Wait - how did you get it off? You're you again! I couldn't say anything, but- you're you!'

Fuck, Jules thought, realising that he'd been lying to Ben this whole time - he had no idea that he'd been able to swap back.

'Yeah,' Jules said. 'I, uh, figured some stuff out. I also talked to Sam.'

'Sam?' Ben asked, sitting forwards. 'Sam, Sam?'

'Yeah - she... gave me some background. Some of it was helpful, some not so much.'

'But you got it off?'

Jules nodded. 'Yeah.'

'How?'

Jules' lips pursed. 'Look, I'm not here to teach you how it works - I don't think I should-'

'Oh, come on, man! You can't tell me? I was here when it happened - I'm in this. Plus, I got spiked, so.'

'What does that have to do with anything?!'

'It means you have to be nice to me! Look - don't push me out, man - what happened to you was... impossible. Incredible. And I saw it with my own two eyes. You can't push me out now. Just... tell me what happened.'

Jules thought about it, considering his options. Then, he decided to honour his friendship. 'Fine,' he said. 'But this stays between us, and you need to be discreet. You understand?'

Ben nodded, clearly excited to be back in the loop.

'I... she,' Jules said, 'needs to... have an... orgasm. To take the collar off.'

Ben frowned, then fought a smirk. 'A what?'

'The clasp at the back?' Jules said. 'It comes back after she...'

'...cums?' Ben said.

'Oh, this was a mistake,' Jules sighed, standing and beginning to pace the room. 'This was a mistake.'

'So - you have to cum to become a boy again? And you did it?! Oh you-'

'Dude, fuck off!' Jules said, almost pleading with him. 'Its weird enough, but hearing it out loud!'

'I mean - fucking hell, man. You jacked off? As a woman?' Then, after a beat, 'What was it like?'

Jules just looked at him. 'What?'

'What was it like?! I mean, you are one of the only people to be able to, you know, walk each side of the road. You can't keep all of your secrets to yourself.'

'I'm not talking about this,' Jules said.

'Dude - you turn into a smoking hot girl, and you have to wank to turn back? This is... insane.'

Jules nodded. 'I know. I know it's insane! I couldn't believe it either - but it's true.' Jules pulled the collar out of his pocket, holding it up. Ben stared at it. 'This little fucking things... it's going to ruin my life.'

'Why?' Ben asked. 'You've got it off - how's it going to ruin anything?'

'Because all I can think about is putting it back on.'

There was a beat of silence.

'I mean - if you want to,' Ben said, a little sheepish. 'I'm not going to stop you.'

Jules raised an eyebrow. 'What?'

'I'm just saying! If you want to be the attractive female version of you, I won't be complaining.'

'Ben-'

'What? She's eye-candy, dude. It's you, but more fun to look at.'

Jules laughed. 'Are you serious? That's the only difference?'

Ben shrugged, smiling too - the tension, whatever it was, had broken. 'Dude, just... do whatever you want. You won't get judgement from me.'

'No, but you're right,' Jules said. 'I've noticed a pretty big change in how people treat me as her, rather than this. And, I have eyes - I know that the female form I have... she's hot, dude.'

Ben broke into a goofy laugh. 'She is, man - sorry to tell you. You're hot!'

They laughed, and Jules could feel the pull of wanting to share more - so, he did. Ben was looking more himself, too, with colour back in his cheeks and running a hand through his dark hair.

'I, uh,' Jules said, deciding to just jump in. 'I bought underwear. Like, women's underwear. And some jeans.'

'Fuck off,' Ben said, an air of disbelief in his voice. 'That... sounds like a step forward.'

Jules nodded. 'It felt like one.'

'You bought a bra?'

'I did. I just... when I was her, I could see people staring, you know? And, it wasn't always bad, but... it wasn't always good, either. So, yeah, I got fitted. Turns out I'm a thirty-two double-D.'

Ben pulled a bit of a face, sitting back. 'That's big, right?'

Jules nodded. 'I mean, yeah. You saw them.'

'I did,' Ben nodded. 'I did indeed.'

'So... I got a fitting, and bought a sports bra, and a lacy thing. And some jeans, too - I figure that if, like, Elliot and Rusty and Tony see Julia wearing Jules' clothes, they might start to think that things are going on, cousin-on-cousin, which is... bad. So, I need some Julia-specific clothes, you know?'

Ben was nodding. 'That actually makes sense. Assuming that, you know, this is a long-term thing.'

'Sam made other suggestions,' Jules said. 'About keeping these two personalities separate. One was to get another phone, new accounts - have a totally separate online presence for her. Next was to take self-defence, because the world is shit for women.'

Ben nodded. 'Well, I got spiked so yeah, I know how it feels. Equally, though, it must have its perks - you said you've had people paying you more attention?'

'Its strange,' Jules said. 'I mean, you kind of know that women get approached in ways that guys don't, but to be on that side of the road, as you put it... it's kinda revealing. Like, I was given two people's numbers in the last two days.'

'Really?'

'A guy and a girl,' Jules said, and Ben's eyebrows popped up. 'What?'

'Well... have you texted them?'

'No - not until I have that other number,' Jules said, before realising that he'd basically admitted he was planning to text them. 'And, even then, I don't know. Obviously, as a guy, I'm, you know, experienced. But it almost feels like starting over, as a woman. God, that's so weird to say.'

Ben nodded, not saying anything to interrupt.

'Even talking to people, as her, it's like... different. And, I can't lie, I like it. At least, some of it.'

'It makes you feel good?'

Jules, after a beat of thought, nodded.

'Then... do it. Be her, if you want to be. Look, I know it's Sunday, but the shop is open until 3 - lets go get you a sim card and a cheap phone, and you can text those people-'

'Wait, what?' Jules said waving his hands. 'Ben, that's too much-'

'Dude,' Ben said, running his hand through his hair. 'I was cool with you being gay when you weren't gay. Now, this isn't quite being trans, or whatever, but... whatever you are, I support you. You're my best friend. If you want to be Julia, follow Sam's advice and get a phone so you can be her, then I'll help you.'

Jules, genuinely touched, pulled the collar out of his pocket again. He held it in his grip, looking down at it.

'I'm a bit scared,' Jules admitted, feeling like there was a rock in his stomach. 'The more I'm her, the more I discover, I'm worried I won't want to be me anymore, you know?'

Ben nodded. 'I get that - but, dude, you're still in the discovery stage, you know? All of this is new. You just bought clothes for Julia today, and you've masturbated as her - but you've just said that you'll probably have those, you know, other experiences in the near future. It's like you're starting puberty all over, but without the awkwardness. Everything is new, and you don't know the limits of what you want. You'll get to lose your virginity again, and you'll have all of your Jules experience behind you this time, you know? This can be good - and it can be as temporary, and as rare as you want. Or, as permanent as you want.' Ben stood up, after his speech, like he'd gotten something off his chest. 'Do whatever you want, Jules - just make sure you want it.'

Jules nodded, lifted the collar to his throat, closed his eyes, and clicked it shut.

#

'Goddamn,' Julia said as she took in the sight of herself. She stood before the mirror in her room, wearing nothing at all, turning to see her own slim curves, and the way her hair fell. She'd done some self-examination before, but it had always been with a degree of... fear, partially. Confusion. Trying to figure herself out.

This time, Julia was just taking the time to enjoy how she looked.

Because, Sam was right.

She looked good.

The part of her that was, undeniably, attracted to women just wanted to admire herself for a minute, to drink in the sight of her. But her mind wasn't just on this body.

It was on what it meant. What it could possibly mean.

Sam's words, and Ben's pep-talk, had started to get some wheels a-turning. Sam had talked about the person who passed the collar on to them - who had decided to become her female self full-time. A whole new life. Julia wondered what it would take to do something like that - to create a new life. It must have taken a lot of paperwork, getting a birth certificate or passport or something that would let her do things like get a job, file taxes, get a national insurance number. All of the types of things you don't think about.

Or, maybe she still uses her male form for that stuff - just for the paperwork. Turns back when she needs to do anything with officiality, but lives her life as herself.

Julia found herself wondering about that part of it. She didn't want to abandon 'Jules' - he still had a job, after all. He was still a person in the world, and Julia knew that beyond not wanting to lose Jules' friends and family, she also liked being him.

Being Julia, like Ben had said, was a novelty she was still exploring. And that exploration was going to go further and further, if she wanted it to.

Which, if she was totally honest with herself, she did.

She wanted to go further.

So, slightly awkwardly, and emulating the movements of women Jules had been with on the mornings after their nights together, Julia pulled on the black lace bra she had bought from Siobhan, as well as the matching panties. She regarded herself in the mirror, her curves complemented beautifully by the shape of the bra.

She oozed sex, and it was getting her heart racing.

So, Julia lifted Jules' phone, and took a few photographs. She tried a few angles, experimenting. Like the women on instagram, finding the ways that the light hit her body, casting dark shadowy plunges and salacious shades.

She took fifteen photos, and saved them to a folder on Jules' phone, tucked away, alongside the picture she'd taken in bed, and in the shop.

Then, she dressed. She pulled on the jeans she'd bought earlier that day, and from the selection of tops and t-shirts she'd picked up, she pulled on a vintage-seeming yellow t-shirt that had a retro blue-and-white vertical strip that ran over the left side of the chest. With her bra on underneath, Julia's tits pushed up and seemed even larger than they had braless, turning that straight line into a curve, bending over her body. She tucked the lower end of the shirt into her jeans, and pulled on some white socks.

She looked at herself again, in the mirror. She looked... cute. Like any girl in the city, and twenty-something; young, pert, smiley. Her legs were concealed, and the collar of her shirt gave her no cleavage. The choker around her neck was a little telling, and her sleeves were short, but for all intents and purposes she was dressed conservatively.

And underneath, she was wearing black, lacy, begging-for-sex underwear.

She pulled on some of the shoes she bought, now actually fitting her feet, and stole a jacket from the back of Jules' door.

Then, she was ready.

'How do I look?' Julia asked Ben as she came into the kitchen, and his face lit up at the sight of her.

'Is it weird to say that, you look like yourself?'

Julia shrugged. 'I don't know. I feel like Julia and Jules are two sides of a coin, you know? Today I've just... the coin landed on this side. And, as that's the case, I should... follow that, you know?'

'Is that how you're going to do it? Flip a coin?'

Julia laughed. 'Nah. Maybe - if I can't decide. But I think I'll just... know, you know? Anyway - I'm going to get that phone before the shops shut. It's Sunday, so, things shut early.'

Ben nodded, and Julia wondered if she spotted a slightly wandering eye. Then, she wondered if it bothered her as much as it should have. 'Sure. Uh - just a question, before you head out. Work, tomorrow. Do you have a plan for that?'

Julia paused, thinking about it. 'I'll do that as Jules, I think,' he said, nodding. 'This weekend has been... a departure from reality. Maybe that sort of thing will snap me out of all this.'

'Snap you out?' Ben asked. 'You think so?'

'Not really,' Julia smiled. 'But we'll see.' When she left, she let the door swing shut behind her.

#

She flipped the phone over in her hand. It was a piece of shit, at least five years old, but it cost less than fifty quid, and she'd gotten a decent deal without too much hassle on a sim card; using Jules' details, she's gotten a good-enough deal, and figured that she'd just see how the first month went anyway.

Whatever - that wasn't important. What was important, was finding a bench in the park nearby to put in the number of Jules' phone, and then the two numbers she'd been given. Mack and Siobhan. Then, she put in Sam, and Ben.

Sitting there, on a bench, as strangers walked past with no idea the weird life Julia had been dropped into, she started to send a few texts.

This is Julia's phone, she sent to Ben. She sent an identical one to Sam.

Hi Mack -this is Julia, from the shop, she sent Mack.

To Siobhan, however, she didn't send any words at first. She just texted her the selfie she'd taken this morning, sent over from Jules' phone. In it, Julia wore that lingerie Siobhan had sold her, only earlier today, her body on-show.

It was a risky text, and one she felt a little nervous sending, but when it was gone, it was gone.

The first person to respond was, predictably, Ben.

Gotcha - that's all he said.

Next, Sam. Welcome to the party, Julia. Let me know if you need me. Julia felt a little thrill go through her at the idea of the offer. Was it an offer? In person, Sam had just about propositioned her for sex, offering her 'services'. To get it 'over with'. And, while Julia saw the value in that - in breezing past the 'first time' nerves with someone she knew well-enough, Julia wasn't sure it was the approach she wanted to take.

No, she could feel something in the way, mentally. Sam didn't feel right.

But, as Julia's phone buzzed, and she saw a message from Siobhan... that felt easier somehow. Like Sam had said, in fact.

Siobhan was closer to a stranger than even Sam was. She didn't know anything. Sam was close to this whole situation, but Siobhan was...

It let Julia keep a barrier up. A boundary.

She opened the text, and it was a picture reply - Siobhan, in that changing room.

Shirt off, her own bra and delicious cleavage front-and-centre. She was biting her lip, a smile on her face as she held the camera before her. A message followed.

There's a customer outside, but if you want more...

Come and find me?

I finish at 4

Siobhan took a shaky breath, and checked the time - 3:44. She had a little over a quarter of an hour to stew over it, a wetness between her thighs, and a hotness in her cheeks.

She stood, and started walking towards the shop, Jules' phone in one pocket, and her own in the other.

#

'I've never done anything like this before,' Siobhan said as she waved goodbye to a person who seemed to be a manager, still inside the store locking up. 'Just... going home with a stranger.'

'Me neither,' Julia said, her breath a little shuddery. 'But... I want to make it clear - are you comfortable?'

Siobhan nodded quickly, her pretty face breaking into a smile. 'Oh, absolutely. My place?'

Julia nodded, and Siobhan led her to her car - a beat-up old thing that looked like it had been stolen more than a few times. Julia climbed in, and Siobhan ripped off home.

They barely talked.

Siobhan drove fast.

Within ten minutes, they were parked up outside a block of flats, and when they stepped out of their doors, it was like the spell was taking effect. Things were becoming more real. They moved with intention, Julia following Siobhan to a doorway where she padded in a code; the door buzzed, and they walked into the building.

No one else was around, and Julia could feel the tension in her chest.

Oh my God oh my God oh my GOD! She was repeating, the fact she was here a testament to how far she'd come.

She was about to have sex.

As Julia.

She was about to have lesbian sex.

Julia was about to lose her virginity.

Oh my GOD!

All of these thoughts swirled and melded and blended as Julia was led to a doorway with a small peephole. Siobhan opened it with a key, and let Julia go in first.

Her flat was, like her, a homely sort of punk rock decor. Band posters had been blue-tacked to the walls, band t-shirts pinned to the walls as decoration - it was the home of a punk chick who wasn't allowed to put nails up, because she was still renting.

Siobhan shut the door behind her, and Julia spun. She was between Siobhan and the rest of her flat, trapping her in this little area. Her back was against the door, and she looked at Julia with a hunger in her gaze. Her tattoos, in this lower light, seemed to snake around her shoulders, and the piercings in her lip and eyebrow glimmered in the dark. She was about the same height as Julia, if a little taller, so she looked slightly down at her with that swallowed smile.

Then, without waiting for anything else - and unsure if the knot in her stomach would kill her if she kept waiting - Julia lunged forwards.

Her lips met Siobhan's in a hungry, moaning kiss as she pushed her back against the door, keys clattering to the floor as Siobhan dropped them, a laugh lost between them as hands began to explore.

They weren't in the changing room anymore - there was no need to be quiet, or to hold back, and Siobhan seemed happy to work with that.

She kissed Julia's neck, making her whimper in a way Jules would never have done; hends went through Julia's hair, curling into a fist and pulling her head one way, giving Siobhan access to her throat. She licked Julia's neck, then kissed her again.

'Fuck, you taste good, baby,' Siobhan moaned, sending shudders through Julia's whole body. She felt like she was going to lose her mind. 'I can't believe you came back for me - I got so wet when you sent me that picture. I've never done anything this, but... fuck, you make me wanna be a bad person.'

Julia let herself be pulled into another kiss, Siobhan's fist in her hair. 'Be bad,' Julia moaned into her mouth. 'Be bad with me.'

Siobhan smiled, her tongue lashing against Julia's bottom lip, then kissing her again. She bit Julia's lip this time, making her gran, as they looked into each other's eyes.

'I don't even know your name,' Siobhan said. 'You're just the slut from the shop - and I want to keep it that way, okay?'

Julia nodded, her pussy soaking into the black lace lingerie she'd worn for this woman, her mind melting. Siobhan shifted her weight, pushing Julia back, turning her against the wall to their left. Julia hit the wall, and Siobhan's knee pushed between her legs.