All Comments on 'The Goddess'

This is what bothered me most - wrong goddesses. Diana and Minerva are different goddesses both from Roman pantheon. Artemis the huntress is the greek equivalent to Minerva, while Diana is a roman name for Athena. I know this is a minor part of your story but it bugs the hell out of me.

Diana is the Roman counterpart for Artemis and Minerva is the Roman counterpart for Athena.

Yea! Of course Minerva is Athena, and Diana is Artemis I just mixed it up, thanks for correcting me!

Great story. God, I thought I was reading about my ex-wife! Gave me chills.

Not a single character to like in this story.

I am really disappointed.

Number one I got my Goddesses mixed up! Sorry for that. I might pull the story after a whole and fix that.

Just as bad I did a late proofread after submitting and found three unnecessary errors where things shifted from first to third person.

Sorry for the blunders.

Jedd Clampett

Proofreading after submission? No wonder the errors stick out so. Agree with another comment - none of the characters likeable. Not your best, seemed rushed to meet the Legends I I deadline date. Still will read your next as I've read all your previous work. Hope you write again soon.

WS

Is that we've read your other stories. I realized I didn't care about any of the people.

You're a good storyteller! Just not this one.

I like your writing, of course, but wasn't liking this story until the last page and then absolutely loved it!

I loved that he grew a pair, loved his words and plan.

I gave a 5 for this satisfying ending.

Thank you!

Great story. Sequel?

I was ready to totally write this one off and say it might as well have been called "Chronicles of a Hapless Simp". But goddamn if Garrett's rant at the end wasn't cathartic as all fuck. Before that I was sure this was going the RAAC route, but I'm glad to be proven wrong.

I give it a 4.

I haven't read anything this depressing since the opening chapter of DQS's "When We Were Married." Totally unsympathetic characters, even though Garrett finally grows a pair at the end. Which I'm sure is exactly what you were striving for with this one, so congratulations are in order!

Crafting misguided, delusional, depressing characters whose pathetic story kept me reading to the end is quite an accomplishment, so my hat's off to you for some terrific writing (to hell with the proofreading goofs -- no matter how many times you proofread, some are gonna get through).

Thanks for tossing this one in the hopper for LD2!

Did he die from the overdose? I noticed what he intended to do but no mention if he lived to do it.

G333

One of the best ever. This is a classic.

You do know what 'squeeze' means? How do you squeeze your eye OPEN? I stopped there, if the writer doesn't know the meaning of that word, the rest wasn't worth reading.

The problem of this Godess was to be the result of a marriage between a inferior man and a whore...so she was only a godess in the exterior...Her interior was rotten...4*

and then the people grew up. TK U MLJ LV NV

But about 3 pages more than the story could carry.

Garret is all talk. He's a fucking patsy, owned by a master manipulator. He has the best of intentions, but not the intelligence nor the courage to take control of his life. Once Frieda figures out why he's not divorcing her, she will take her time, wheedle her way back into his life, through the children, and eventually fuck his brains out (that won't take much fucking) and persuade him to give their marriage another chance. Her parents will provide her with the funds to royally fuck him over in the legal system, and he has too little energy to fight her. He's a hard working master from the neck down, and a doofus tool from the neck up. He will telegraph and indicate exactly what he wants Frieda to say and do, and she will play her role to the max, making him think that, finally, FINALLY, she really loves him. And she actually will, to the extent her midget heart and empty soul is capable of. Sadly, or maybe not, it will be enough to turn him around and keep the family together, until the kids are gone. Then one day, Frieda will in fact meet The One, and Garret will find himself, once again, holding an empty sack of broken dreams. The poor fool will deserve what he allows Frieda to do to him.

Write the rest of that story, if you have the time and talent.

But I didn't 1 bomb it. Loved the characters, loved the writing, but it was alittle dragged out and I hated the ending. Actually, I scrolled through the last 2 pages just to get there. Usually the indicator of a structural problem?

Katie's your older daughter, but Lauren's the oldest?

I don't think it's tacky to offer payment to a relative for their skill or expertise. If they choose to decline that's their choice.

"then I'll deal with your aunt." - Sister-in-law!

Refusal of fellatio would mean no cunnilingus! I can understand a reluctance, and wouldn't insist on one-for-one, but there has to be SOME! I understand that he hasn't asked, but we've already heard her say that she wouldn't.

God, even without the cheating this cruel, frigid bitch should be kicked to the curb!

Okay, I can buy the doctor feeling threatened initially, but once Garrett went down, how does he justify the beating?

If that was MY daughter she'd get a slap that she'd remember!

"Frieda looked at her kids" - I think you mean Frieda's MOM, unless Frieda's ego is so big that she's bragging about her own looks!

What a bitch her mother is! She knows that Frieda cheated and wants to make GARRETT pay?

He doesn't trust her friends who are giving him the scoop?

She talks about all his talents NOW, why has she been so dismissive of him in the past?

Backing away from fights is often the sign of a strong man!

"Is that all you're going to ask?" - How about answering THOSE questions, then we'll see!

"You're my husband. You love me" - Yes, but do YOU love HIM?

"You didn't care that I didn't love you" - No, he didn't KNOW you didn't love him.

I thought Frieda was going to turn out having the same mental illness as her mother.

another cocksucking wimp posting dumb cuck SHIT.

get a fucking editor.

Wimp + whore. Nothing new here. I don't know how anyone could find this characters remotely appealing.

whoever gave this wimpy faggoty writer "legend" status?

Yes, but you were too fucking lazy. If you can't finish a story, don't post it.

If old Garrett ever tried some of that shit, wifey eventually would be forced to divorce him and HE would end out of the house pretty damn fast. So that last half page rant didn't change a thing, it was only air.

You're so full of air in you lived in the Caribbean you'd be a fucking hurricane you dim witted ass wipe

It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. And that is kinda how this struck me.

Some anonymi (my spelling of plural anonymous respondents) have their heads really far up their asses. Ignore the ignorant, just as I ignore Trump!

This was an interesting story of a man who loved deeply and was partially blinded by the one he loved. She is a bit of a lost soul but clearly had very little soul. He finally solved the problem he had with his wife and tried to solve it as best he could. There should be an epilogue but maybe from (FTDS) as he is likely to do. Coming from a dysfunctional family as Frieda did is not a sufficient excuse for her actions. Clearly money and social status is not an excuse for not being human. I really liked the story and how you wove the scenario.

Continue on!

Tiny Tim

I read the whole story. Nothing happened. I was hoping for something, but it went no where. The pace was so slow, and the recapping of past evens in the characters lives was tedious and drawn out. Miserable writing style. Miserable characters.

Your usual romp in the fields. Marry in haste, repent in leisure. But how long do you have to pay?

Boyd Percy

Not many people to like here

truth to it or a hero yours has neither it was horrible.

People are wrong. There are likable characters in the story; like his brother and their wives. Nice hardworking and loving people, and you can't stop feeling sorry for Garret. He loved a Goddess, and Goddesses only love themselves and are too self-centered to really care about somebody else. At the end Garret found some backbone, wisdom, and finally realized that a love not reciprocated is an unhealthy love, and will never lead to true happiness. Sad story, somehow it leaves you feeling pity and sadness. Thanks for the effort of writing the story. I have enjoyed a lot some of your other stories. After all, nobody hits 1000.

with a nice story arc that rose up like a July 4th firework. Thanks for posting

How can a man fool himself for 15 years???

The wife at least realized she was in a wrong place. But cheating is the worst way to end a marriage.

Enjoyed reading your story Carvohi. Gave you 3*s. For all the usual Carvohi reasons,🕛🕧🕐🕜🕑🕝🕒........😄

AMerryman

With the commenters here why put up the the BS.

Good story, loved it. The man finally after a world's worth of condemnation found his balls, got out of a loveless marriage and moved on.

It takes a lot of courage to leave a marriage, even when you've suspected you were a cuck. He just needed his face rubbed in it.

5*, and I'll read you on SOL anyday.

Two men hospitalised after an 'incident' in the car park. One run down by a moving car. The police would have been there demanding statements and questioning witnesses.

The goddess evidently meant was known as "Artemis" to the Greeks and "Diana" to the Romans.

"Minerva" was the Roman name for the Greek goddess Athena.

Perhaps we should take the misnaming as an example of Artemistic license. :)

To suddenly change course. And the minute he tries to put her out her Mother and Father will hire a lawyer, who will file for a divorce and he'll be out of the house, paying alimony, child support and the house payment. It makes no difference to the Courts whose name is on the title. All those years makes the house joint property. They want what's best for the kids. Even if he keeps the house he'll be paying for her and the kids to live somewhere. No way he gets custody. This was a lousy fairy tale. And one of your more convoluted stories. It is much better than the standard drivel that gets posted these days, but it wasn't your best work. Thanks for the effort.

I read the whole story and was surprised by the ending. I was sure he would lie down and forget his whole rant. He really was a wonderful guy, but his love was too much for him.

Garret was oblivious at first, because he loved her completely and unconditionally. Good for him! An admirable trait being a faithful father and husband working his ass off to support his family, and making every effort for their happiness. Then he discovers her cheating, and is shell shocked. He doesn't run off and do anything rash, he thinks things through and acts in the best interests of his family, again! That doesn't make him a wimp, it doesn't make him weak. It's dignified, and it's strong to take one for the team and wait to find out what the truth is.

When he does, he gives his wife the chance to prove her love, even if she just would lie to him convincingly. He never gives up on her until she goes out of her way to remain cold to him. Then he puts her out forcefully. I like this character, I like this plot, I like your approach, I like your tone, I like your writing, and Godess names are highly over rated. This is my favorite story of the Carvohi opus omnia. Thanks for writing it, and thanks for sharing it!

Shame it isn't up to the standard of some of the others; it isn't a very interesting story, I had to force myself to read to the end in the hope it may get better.

I like hubby's trailer park plan. However, she will likely meet another sap and take advantage of him. Great story. Ditto MiC's comments.

Teenage girls might like it. I found it tiresome.

(Tiresome) Perfect choice of words to describe a lot of this writers stuff.

This story departs from his usual endings by the betrayed hubby not being a full fledged cuckold. This time the hubby is less wimpy and finally finds the balls to kick the bitch to the curb.

A refreshing change:)

He finally woke up to what was happening, then addressed the situation.

Is no place for a women. I tried that once and in no uncertain terms was told to look at her as a real person and not someting to be idolized. It was great advice from the most spectacular lover I have ever known.

While this story did tend to ramble the characters were spot on. The carpenter does not break character even while the walls tumble. If anything the wife is a perfectly fabricated narcissist with some sociopathic tendencies. They were not created to be admired they are carefully crafted zoo specimens and I know one of each.

Really appreciate stories that come to grips with problems without the aid of super agents, spy satellites and limitless budgets. Good read and well deserving of LD2 status. Thanks for the story.

Was Garret a skinny little fucker? Christ, I'm not sure after the first 2700 times you mentioned it. You went from the present to past so many times, I wasn't sure where the story was taking place.

And you went from first to third person so often I was getting dizzy and I'm suffering from whiplash.

With all the stories you've written, you are better than this. This was just plain sloppy.

Unnecessarily long with characters that that are really just caricatures. Very disappointing.

Most of the characters were so flawed . Your ending didn't compute. After 15 years even a cheater has rights. So without a legal separation signed and documented this ending was a fairy tale. Cheating and in a court of law she will still get the house and kids till they are 18 yrs old. He will get screwed . The courts in most states do not care who is a cheater and the women get to raise their children. As bad as that seems that's the way the system works.

I gave it a 4 just because of who wrote it and the overall quality of the story. I thought it might have been better and tighter without all the needless repetition of explanations. I liked the story and the finish. It felt a little bit like an Ohio story.

Thanks for your efforts to entertain us.

Decent story, but could have been better if less was repeated in the inner monologues, and more had happened outside their thoughts to balance it out, not to mention the proofreading;

There were a lot of POV problems, seems like the author has trouble deciding between first and third person, sometimes from sentence to sentence.

That 'epilogue' is just a waste of words, would have been better to write nothing, though the best would have been to write an actual end rather than letting the story peter out.

As the story is now, it is rambling a lot, but saying very little, the word count could have been almost halved and not much, if anything, would have been lost.

All in all the story feels rushed and not that well though out, the author also messed up with the mythological reference, referencing Minerva (the roman version of Athena) when I expect it should have been Artemis.

The story really needs a rewrite to tighten it up, and fix the mistakes.

I'm a big fan, and you are one of my favorites. I just couldn't connect or feel empathy for either character. I just found myself not caring about hubby. I'm also perplexed with how quickly he morphed into a hubby with backbone. Hope to see more of your stuff.

Colossally failed in this attempt. Worst story I have read. Legend? Ha.

And Carvohi is one of my favorites. What happens? Forced a story for legends day. too bad.

You are much better than this

from me

But it's a valuable lesson for a lot of people. Too often we make decisions based on what we feel and what we WANT to be true. Unfortunately, wishful thinking is not a good basis for decision making.

Garret was just an extreme example of a guy who truly wanted his wife to love him because he loved her so much. He may have been ordinary in appearance but his actions in supporting his family, in his work, and what kind of guy he was were noble. He just had this blind spot about his wife, which he FINALLY rectified.

It is stressed over and over that he loved her, but really he just worshiped her. Without any return feelings, it isn't really love. The wife was truly messed up, and couldn't even tell him she loved him. For some reason she said it indirectly through Ginger. I admit I didn't get into this couple very much, but just felt sad. Blame the disfunctional parents, I guess. Even though there is no end, I think a follow up would be good. The ice princess could find a heart if she looked hard enough for it; it's in there somewhere!. She feels bad, but is not really in touch with her feelings. Why'd she live in a trailer, if she has money? I'd be curious how she'd figure out what to do.

Good start to ending- he rocked.

A trial separation in a trailer park would do her very, very well; "Don't you know what you've got till it's gone".

She has taken him for granted, and has always been expecting her True Love to pop up (her idiotic mother didn't help).

The male character was over the top wishy washy, wimpy until the very end. Up to the very end it seemed like he got what he deserved being stupid enough to have married his wife and sticking with her for fifteen years. Basically I really didn't like or enjoy this story, so I gave it a 3.

A cuckolded wimp got weary enough to find some spine. The woman was held slightly responsible for her decisions, That may not seem like much but it was carvohi that wrote it.

This was nuclear BTB all things considered. Loved it.

I enjoyed the character development. But in MD, an epic beating like the one delivered will get the attention of law enforcement. Where would she have stood on that? Could he take some revenge (sue) the good Dr?

Thanks for writing this.

bit too wordy in some places but not enough at the end i thought. that said i enjoyed it, she was a cruel heartless bitch and he was just a regular guy, just my kind of story. great 5*

Poorly written, sometimes confusing, verbose enough to make Howard Cosell proud, just filler between the initial incident-the wife being caught cheating-and the ending-kicking the wife out. Several thousands of words could have been deleted without affecting the story.

Frieda stated that the doctor was soft and weak and Garret was lanky and muscular. Garret was a fireman so he had to be in excellent shape. So how did he lose the fight with the Doctor. The doctor was the wimp! Even if Garret had pneumonia, he should have still beaten the shit out of the wimp doctor.

Frieda wasn't a whore since she didn't charge money. Frieda was a SLUT!

Enjoyed it--like when you toy with new ideas.

Best not to use logic when you read carvohi's stories. They are entertaining and can be a good read, but you have to turn your brain off in order for that to happen.

Who are impossible to like.

It started on a negative note and slowly slid further into darkness the further we read.

Laila needs help.

It's sad how two young people can fuck up their lives. Hers as an overreaction to the rejection of Bradley. Him loving someone out of his league that never loved him. Although he never truly truly loved her. His love was very selfish. If he had truly loved her and he saw how unhappy she was with him, he would have helped her move on long time ago. He says he purposely got her pregnant so that he could keep her. He kept her from her dreams and in the end the girl never fell in love with him. She was special, beautiful, intelligent and hard worker (she was a great student), while he was average in all ways (including an average student). They were a couple not equally yoked. He selfishly did everything he could to get her, to keep her and he tied an anchor around her with the baby.

She should have bit the bullet, got an abortion (gone against the pastor father) or found a way to go to Cornell by letting her mom watch the baby till she finished school. Or even given her to Garrett. He fucked up her life, and she fucked up his life. His fault more because she was vulnerable losing Bradley and he took advantage of that to get her and then tied her down by purposely getting her pregnant (he admits it).

u wrote same things over and over and over again. theres being stupid blinded by love, then there just plain stupid stephen and forest seemed to be the only smart ones in this story

But intense and interesting writing.

With your bad characters. 'Wish Garrett was a tad deeper, but still...

Probably your best story (that I have read, anyway- still working my way through the oeuvre), although it isn't my favorite ,by a long shot. I like something that might be called a happy ending,like everyone else, but I thought that you did a very fine job drawing the characters in this story, and I thought that the ending was very true to the characters' development, which is really my standard for judgment. Nice job

notme

notmenopenotme@mail.com

if Frieda and her mommy are satisfied at last, TK U MLJ LV NV

Could and should have been half as long.

I need anti stupid pills. I read a Carvohi story. Yeah I know. Bad for my health. That's why I need the prescription.

He said he wasn't going to divorce her.

This story chases more rabbits than Elmer Fudd’s dog. It’s just all over the place. Just when the storyline starts to move forward, bam, it takes a hard turn down some hole into nonsense that contributes absolutely nothing to the story. Add that to the fact that the main character is an idiot with the common sense of a box of rocks, and you get a mess of a story like this. I’ve read other stories by this author and I know he can write. Maybe he was delirious when he wrote this, like his character was throughout most of the story.

Goes off to much

He is masochistic mental stalker mentality and on and on

1. You got your Greek and Roman gods mixed up. Diana and Minerva are Roman. Diana/Artemis is the virgin goddess of the hunt, childbirth and women.

Minerva/Athena the virgin goddess of poetry, medicine, wisdom, commerce, magic.

2. Meclizine aka non-drowsy Dramamine II is not a drug that will keep him slipping in and out of consciousness. It will just keep him from tossing his cookies.

3. After being severely beaten in front of witnesses, not defending himself, and his assailant only being injured by a car, how the heck can his brothers, the police and ambulance all look the other way and not make a report?

Dr. Menisci should have been handcuffed to the hospital bed and moved to the jail after he recovered.

4. He never did get her to answer THE question. (Why did you sleep with other men?)

5. @Anonymous 03/10/19. How right you are!

I found this story confusing and inconsistant.

Additionally, why was the Dr. not charged with assult. Head damage is a serious thing.

I fell asleep multiple times, is it over?

Why was you so sacred? Were you god?

I highly recommend you read this story if you need to throw up or suffer from insomnia

but so much unnecessary back story stopped the story from progressing. The story could have been 1/2 the length and been good.

Even though this story was written three years ago I feel the urge to comment because there are so many parts of the story that I identify with. Being married to a woman who does not return love as much as it is given to her is not a deal breaker while children and a family is being raised. A woman who does not initiate sex and relies on her partner to help her enjoy sex is not a deal breaker. Regular sex in marriage can be enjoyable. It just is. As long as husband and wife are civil to each other and the children are happy regular sex for a husband is what you get married for. If his wife is not highly responsive it is not a deal breaker. Frieda and Garrett were not a perfect match but they had an 8 out 10 marriage which was still good until Frieda spoiled things with her infidelity. Carvohi has portrayed these things brilliantly in my view. The final decision by Garrett to cast Frieda adrift and re-plan his future without a divorce was beautifully described. A great tale thank you Carvohi.

another Carvohi story and goes "plop". So much writing for such dead-ends. Ugh

DON'T KNOW WHAT ALL THE BITCHING WAS ABOUT, THOUGHT IT WAS A GOOD STORY!

Garrett was right. There is no worse feeling than loving someone who doesn't love you back.

Perfect story .

One of the rare times you didn't force the wimp back with the unrepentant whore

I hate stories where the guy is so weak he cant finish a sentence. Even though he stood up for himself in the end, by the time he did I was so sick of him I didnt even care if he stayed with her or not.

Was 5* until the"non-ending"... One page away from excellent in my book, but solid story overall. You have a unique way of creating some seriously twisted, sick, morally corrupt characters. Usually they are women...hmm. LOL! 4*

Read three of your stories. All your women are psychopaths, and all your men are pussies.

I don't know how anyone could enjoy wallowing in this lugubrious nonsense. I managed to read the whole thing and now I feel icky. The only character who seemed like a real person was the younger brother who knew a train wreck when he saw one. On page 3, the husband tells us, "I loved my wife. I wanted to keep her. I didn't care if she was being unfaithful. I had to keep her. She was my everything." He knew she never loved him, "We were young and in love, at least I was." and he was afraid she was going to leave him for her lover. So, he knew she cheated and didn't love him but he still loved her. Then, for no discernible reason, he decided never mind, it's all too much. Maybe the moral of the story is 'better late than never,' but I just don't see it.

The grass is always greener on the otherside, coz its covered with bullshite. Lol, loved it. Many people drag out relationships due to "potential" while idolizing their spouse. Garret was boy, he became a man when he finally kicked the parasite of a "Goddess" out.

While I liked the story and the writing was well done, I dont know why people cannot tell a story in a straight line. Jump to high school, jump to the parents, then retell the same story from another point of view. I think the story could have been good at 1/2 the words.

I friend told me she married just to get out of her parents house. She later cheated and abandoned her 3 school aged kids for her lover. Who later dumped her.

Sadly slot of women have tolfd similar stories.

This story seems very real to life.

But only the husband and kids pay for the woman's decisions.