tagTranssexuals & CrossdressersThe Grass Ain't Always Greener...

The Grass Ain't Always Greener...


Lawn care takes an unexpected voyeurism and exhibitionism masturbation detour

I cut grass, mow lawns, manicure shrubs, trim bushes, and plant trees. Right handed and always trimming from the right side, I've never been a switch hitter when using my hedge trimmer, if you know what I mean. Always working from the same side of the hedge, even though the grass may seem greener from the other side, I'm never been comfortable trimming from the other side of the hedge. Then, one day, because of the wife of one of my regular customers, Lola, it occurred to me that all this time I've been trimming from the wrong side of the hedge.

All of this time I've been using my tools incorrectly and my God given talents in the wrong way. Only, not equipped with directions when I was born, inserting here instead of inserting there, who knew? All this time, I thought the grass was always greener on the other side and you know what? It is.

Lawn care, that's my job and that's my business. Sometimes, what's most fun for me, I accompany customers to nurseries to pick out a good tree and/or a healthy bush to plant. Most customers don't even know what they want, forget about telling them all the names of the flowers. It's a waste of my breath telling them the Latin names because they forget the name as soon as I utter it. Instead, I give them a list of all the plants and flowers that are on their property. They just want something that's easy to care for, something that's colorful, and something that looks good.

One of my regular customers is Lola. She's my dream woman. The eighth wonder of the world, she's a beautiful, blue-eyed blonde, with lush, long hair, big tits, albeit implants, and a nice ass, an understatement. Without doubt, bar none, she has the perfect ass. Never in my life have I ever seen a better ass on a woman.

'Oh, my God. I just love her ass.'

Her husband, Paul, is a dentist. Seemingly, as are all dentists, he's on the weird side. He's always staring at me as if he's a starving man and I'm lunch. In the way he looks at me, he makes me wonder if he's gay or bi-sexual. Definitely, I can see him as being a switch hitter, if you know what I mean. Definitely, if he was a lawn care guy, he'd be trimming his hedges from the other side, if you know what I mean.

In the way the Lola prances around her backyard in her barely there bikini, she makes me glad that I'm a man. It's a sad shame for a man who has a wife like her to be interested in wanting to have sex with a man and to be staring at me in the way that that I stare at his wife. Whatever floats your boat and keeps it afloat and to each their own but I don't get it. Paul wanting me in the way that I want his wife makes no sense to me why a man would be looking at another man when he has a woman like Lola.

'Damn, she's so hot.'

I love watching her strut around in her high heels which, by the way, makes her ass and calves appear even better, absolutely incredible. As if she's the Queen of Sheba, she lays out by the pool topless with her magnificent body draped across a chaise lounge for me to see her big tits. Honestly, in the way they both care so much about their personal appearance and grooming, it wouldn't surprise me if they were swingers. It wouldn't surprise me if Paul uses Lola to attract other women who are as beautiful as she is and other men who are as handsome as he is.

In the way they look at me, undressing me with their eyes, it wouldn't surprise me if they wanted me to participate in a threesome and to be honest, I would, but I'm not a gay man. Not attracted to Paul in the way that he appears to be attracted to me, I have no interested in having sex with him, but I'd do his wife. Oh, yeah, I'd do Lola. More than beautiful, she's warm, friendly, funny, witty, and nice. If I had a wife, I'd want her to be just like Lola, L-O-L-A, Lola.

In three years, I can't even begin to count how many times I've masturbated over Lola, L-O-L-A, Lola. I imagine her naked. I imagine her in my bed with me. I imagine having sex with her. I imagine her sucking my cock while looking up at me with her big, blue eyes and beautiful face while I hump her mouth and fuck her face.

'Suck my cock Lola.'

Never an ass person before, always a breast man, admittedly, because she has such a wonderful ass, my favorite position to sexually fantasize about her is when taking her from behind as she bends over with her amazing ass sticking in the air. Where most men's fantasies begin and end with winning the lottery, my real life's fantasy is the same as my sexual fantasy. Having never lusted over another man's wife before, I dream of having sex with Lola, L-O-L-A, Lola. I want Lola. I love Lola. I must have Lola.

After servicing their lawn care needs for years, my sexual fantasy finally happened when Lola walked over to the tall hedges that I was trimming. I've seen her topless, of course, lots of times but only from afar and from a distance far enough away that I can barely make out her nipples. Whenever she's out there and I'm trimming her hedges and manicuring her lawn and seeing bits and pieces of her with furtive peeks through the openings in the shrubbery, I imagine doing her, making love to her before fucking her, really fucking her.

'God, she's so beautiful. God, she's so fine. If ever we establish contact with Aliens, putting our best foot forward, Lola should represent the women of planet Earth.'

No doubt, always slow to cover up, obviously, she knows I'm looking. With the sound of my hedge trimmer, how could she not know I'm there staring and leering? No doubt, she knows I've seen her topless. Always looking, peeping, and peeking, how could she not know that I want her and would do anything to have her?

I can't get enough of Lola. She's in my thoughts before I get there, she's in my thoughts while I'm there, and she's in my thoughts after I leave. Honestly, I don't think she cares that I ogle her big breasts and that I've seen her topless so very many times. Perhaps, with a name like Lola, she's French and is used to sunning herself topless on the beaches along the French Riviera.

Being that the top of the hedges were up to her shoulders and being that she requested that I leave them that high to afford her the privacy that she wants and needs when she's outback sunning herself topless, I figured when she was standing there talking to me that she was wearing her bikini. Only, as she walked along with me while talking as I worked, it wasn't until we moved down to the chest high hedges and then to the waist high hedges that I realized she was topless. She's not wearing her bikini bra. When my workday starting out with a rainy forecast, here it is with the sun shining brightly over me.

'Oh, my God,' I thought to myself. 'Thank you Jesus for filling my day with her perfect, twin full moons.'

Just the width of a hedge away, her big tits and erect nipples were so close to my horny hands that I could reach out and touch them, feel them, fondle them, and caress them. I so wanted to feel her phony tits. I so wanted to take them in my mouth and suck her big, perfect nipples. I so wanted to know if I could tell the difference between real breasts or implanted ones but, she's my customer's wife and if word got around that I was disrespectful by ogling someone's wife, I'd be out of business.

"Hi Christopher. I made some lemonade. It's in the house," she said. "It's freshly squeezed," she said filling my mind with the image of squeezing her big balloons. "After you're finished working, Paul would like you to come inside. He'd like to talk to you. Help yourself to the lemonade."

"Yeah, sure. I'll only be a few more minutes," I said losing my train of thought when I saw her big, double D tits.

With her tits too big for her shapely body, even though she's tall, 5'9" without heels and 6' with heels, her breasts are nice nonetheless. I've seen silicone breasts before and some of them looked to round, too much like implanted basketballs. Except for the size of them, her breasts looked real. They looked natural. Those perfect, surgically enhanced breasts must have cost her husband a small fortune.

Just as I love seeing her topless and just as I dream of her tits while sexually fantasizing over her, especially now that she was standing so very close to me, I love seeing her wearing a tight top. So shapely, she looks fabulous in tight clothes. I've seen her dressed to go out somewhere with her husband and she looks just as unbelievable in a long gown with her hair up as she does in a short skirt with her hair down. Just as some cars look fast when they're parked, she'd look fabulous wearing a green, plastic trash bag.

I watched her sashaying away while swaying her shapely hips as she disappeared inside the house. Definitely, even if she had no tits and even if she was flat-chested, if only just by her beautiful face and her perfect ass, for the sake of her exquisite ass, I'd do her. She has the best ass I've ever seen on a woman.

"Hi Paul, did you want to see me?"

"Yes. Sit, sit," he said pointing to the couch.

"I'm all dirty and sweaty," I said.

"Don't worry about it," he said waving his lack of concern with his hand. "I have a couch protector on the sofa that I use for the dogs. If you don't mind getting a bit of pet hair on you, I figure that will protect the couch from being stained with your grime and perspiration," he said.

I sat on the couch across from Paul. From my vantage point, when I turned my head a little to the left, I could see that Lola was in the bedroom with the door open enough for me to see her lying on the bed. Forget about her wearing her barely there bikini and forget about her strutting around the backyard in high heels topless, she was laying there in plain view of me naked.

'Naked, naked, naked, Lola was naked.'

She knew I'd be sitting there. She knew I'd see her nude body. She knew I'd be watching her, staring at her, and lusting over her. She was hot, so very hot.

'Oh, my God, can this day get any better? What a beautiful body on this broad?'

I wondered if she knew that I could see her. I wondered if her husband knew that I could see her and that she was naked. I wondered if they both knew that I could see her laying naked upon her bed. I wondered if they were setting me up on the pretense of talking to me about something just to give me a sexy show of Lola's fabulous body. I wondered why they'd go through all of this seduction just to seduce me, their lawn care man, especially when I'd readily do his wife if only he'd ask me to have sex with Lola.

'Lola, L-O-L-A, Lola, definitely, I'd love to do Lola.'

"I wanted to talk to you, Christopher, about making something elaborate for the pool. As you know, there's very little shade out there and I wanted to know what it would cost to make it look more like a jungle scene."

"A jungle scene?"

"Help yourself to some lemonade," he said. "Yes, something very plush, lush, and tropical."

I leaned closer to the table not so much to get some lemonade, which I did, but to take a better look at Lola. She had all of her toys spread out all over the bed. I watched her handle them, as if she was deciding which one to choose. Obviously, she was about to masturbate. She was about to give me a sexy show of her playing with herself.

'Oh, my God. How hot is that? I'll be masturbating over this tonight.'

Without doubt, bar none, Lola, especially now that she's naked with her perfect body is the best looking woman I've ever seen. With her flat, toned stomach, her perfect ass, and her long, shapely legs, the only flaw she has is that her tits are too big. She would have looked fantastic if she didn't go any bigger than a full C cup. A C cup on her would have looked more realistic than jumbo, double D's. Maybe her husband is into big tits but I'm not going to hold her big tits against her, that is, unless she promises to hold them against me one day.

'A man can dream, can't he?'

And with my hand around my cock while stroking myself, I dream of Lola every night. Every night I have sex with Lola in my dreams. Every night, I kiss her full lips while touching her beautiful face with my hand. Every night I feel and fondle her naked body where no man should feel another man's wife. Every night I lick her before I fuck her and before she sucks me.

'I love you Lola.'

Then, there's her face. Drop dead gorgeous, absolutely stunning, she's beautiful. There's beauty and then there's real beautiful, Elizabeth Taylor beauty when she's was young before she became puffy from drinking too much, wrinkled from smoking too much, and obese from eating too much.

There's classic beauty and then there's Miss America and Miss Texas beauty queen beautiful. Lola has that the tall, blonde, leggy, Miss America and Miss Texas beauty queen look. After this sexy masturbation show, from now on, whenever I have a sexual fantasy, Lola will be the star of my show, that's for sure.

With one eye looking at Paul and one eye ogling Lola, I watched her playing with her big tits and fingering her erect nipples. I found that if I sipped my lemonade with my glass nearly up to my eyes that I could watch her without detection from her husband. Besides, not paying any attention to his wife or to me, he was busy anyway looking through magazines to show me pictures of what he wanted me to make his backyard resemble. If I had a wife who looked like her, I'd never take my eyes off of her. If I had a wife who had her body, I'd never be looking through magazines at flowers when I already had the most beautiful flower that God could make.

By all that he was looking at and pointing out to me, good thing that he has deep pockets because what he wants will cost him a bundle with all of those mature trees and oversized, exotic jungle plants. Everything has to be imported and there's no guarantees that these plants will survive this tepid climate. Many of what he wanted needs the deep in the equator like heat.

Lola was watching me watch her as she masturbated. How hot is that? Suddenly, I felt like one of the chain gang prisoners in Cool Hand Luke watching a woman wearing a thin, cotton dress without underwear washing her car with lots of soapy suds. I gave her my best, sexy smile to let her know that I was interested. How could she not know that I wasn't interested? With my eyes bugging out of my head and my tongue was falling out of my mouth, all the pent up sexual desire for her was there on unhidden display now. Then, when she put her dildo to her lips and took it inside and out again, in and out and in and out, I thought I'd cum in my jeans.

'Oh, my God, fuck me. This woman was deep throating her dildo in the way that I wished she'd deep throat me.'

I'm going to have to schedule my next lawn care visit when her husband isn't home. Now that I think about it, he's scheduled to go away on a dental convention next month and he never takes her with him because she's easily bored. Perfect. I'd love for her to open wide and say, 'Ahhh,' before filling her every cavity with my cock.

With Paul still looking through the magazines for pictures to show me, I couldn't believe it when she flipped herself over to stick her round, firm ass in the air. What an ass? What an unbelievable ass? She has such an incredible ass. Then, when she started sticking that dildo in her ass, she made me wish it was my cock fucking her in her perfect ass.

'Oh, yeah, baby, stick that dildo deep in your ass, you sexy slut.'

It was when she started humping the mattress that I got an erection. Paul made me wish I had money. He made me wish I was rich and she made me wish I had Lola. Albeit the monster breasts, I'd do anything to have a wife who looked like her. My perfect woman, I wondered if she had a sister, an identical twin sister named Mona because after witnessing Lola's sexy show, I'd make Mona moan all day and all night long. Hell, I'd even do her mother, Fiona, if she had a mother named Fiona, especially if she looked anything like Lola, albeit an older version.

Lola, Lola, Lola, oh yeah, I'll be dreaming of Lola tonight. I love you Lola. I want you Lola. I have to have you Lola. Maybe after this enthusiastic show of her exhibitionism along with my voyeurism, she'll be open for a bit to a day of romance next month.

It wasn't until she got off the bed and stood to walk to the bedroom door to close it that I realized that the grass isn't always greener on the other side of the shrub. Expecting to see her bushy, trimmed, or bald pussy, I expected to take the image of her naked cunt to bed with me tonight to lick it. As I always have before, I expected to take her beautiful face and lips to bed with me to kiss them. Part of her whole package, I expected to take herd jumbo breasts to suck them. Instead, I couldn't believe my eyes.

I was shocked. I was broken hearted. I was crushed. My sexual desire for her was immediately extinguished.


What? How can this be? No way! I don't believe it. Suddenly, Donovan singing Lola erupted my mind in song.

"She walked up to me and she asked me to dance.
I asked her name and in a dark brown voice she said, "Lola"
L-O-L-A Lola, lo lo lo Lola

Well, I'm not the world's most physical guy,
but when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine
Oh my Lola, lo lo lo Lola, lo lo lo Lola

Well, I'm not dumb but I can't understand
why she walks like a woman and talks like a man
Oh my Lola, lo lo lo Lola, lo lo lo Lola

Well, I'm not the world's most passionate guy,
but when I looked in her eyes,
I almost fell for my Lola,
Lo lo lo Lola, lo lo lo Lola

Girls will be boys, and boys will be girls.
It's a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world,
except for Lola. Lo lo lo Lola. Lo lo lo Lola.

Well I'm not the world's most masculine man,
but I know what I am and that I'm a man,
so is Lola. Lo lo lo Lola. Lo lo lo Lola."

Lola isn't a woman. Lola is a man. Albeit a bit shrunken, Lola has a cock and testicles. That's just wrong. That's just nasty. How can a man have such an amazing ass and such a beautiful face and have a penis?

Someone that sexy and that beautiful, and someone with such an incredible ass can't be a man, can he? Can she? How can she be a he? As if my world was suddenly turned upside down, as if I suddenly stopped knowing right from wrong and black from white, and as if I could be swayed to become a gay man for the sake of making love to Lola, I was thinking about batting for the other team. Maybe I should start trimming my shrubs from the other side.

The grass may always seem greener on the other side of the hedge and sometimes it is. I'm living my life now as a gay man with Paul and Lola, real name Louis. We're happy, especially when I can explored Lola's perfect ass. I love it when she dresses up as a woman. I love watching her driving men insane by flashing them her panties in up skirts and/or teasing them with her tits in down blouses. Just as I didn't, no one would guess that Lola, L-O-L-A, was born a man.


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