The Guitar Player Ch. 06

This is the conclusion of the Guitar Player. I know that there will be plenty of readers that won't be happy with my story. But as I've said before, I write stories I like to read. Anyway, I hope most of you enjoyed it.

When news of Todd's betrayal of Tanya became public knowledge, you would have thought that I would be ecstatic, but I wasn't. I mean, I couldn't have planned a more perfect revenge than to have Todd steal a big chunk of Tanya's money. And then to have the man who stole my wife sent to jail. Not only that, but my cheating ex-wife's career had taken a major hit.

The following day, another scandal erupted about Tanya. Apparently, Todd had stolen songs from young writers and had Tanya record them. One of those songs had done well, making it to number fourteen. To make matters worse for Tanya, there was some question about whether she knew about the thief.

I should have been over the moon happy about Tanya's fall. But the truth was that I was just sad for her and for me. My grandfather's words were now thundering around in my head. I'm sure that losing the money hurt Tanya, and the song scandal had tarnished her reputation. But I was certain that what really hurt her was the realization that Todd had used her and hadn't helped her career at all. That had to be a crushing blow to her. But that was only a passing thought for me. I no longer loved Tanya, and while I was sad for her, I wasn't going to lose any sleep.

Now that Dawn and I were engaged, my main concerns were centered on my soon-to-be wife and my new daughter-to-be, Allison. I was a little sad to be dialing back our act, but I would gladly trade any musical career for the love of Dawn and Allison. Unfortunately, I had pushed everyone so hard for so long that just as I found true happiness, disaster struck.

When we finished our last concert, it was obvious that Dawn was totally worn out. I had to admit that I was also exhausted, so I suggested we skip the Grammys and just rest. But to my surprise, Dawn really wanted to go. When I asked her why Dawn smiled and said she wanted to see all the famous people. I couldn't help but laugh. However, the Grammys turned out to be a nightmare, and my whole life began to tumble out of control.

I had planned to jump back into the studios as soon as we returned from our tour. However, Dawn was so exhausted and suffering from some intestinal problems that I told her to rest. I also insisted that she go to the doctor for a check-up. Our primary care physician diagnosed diverticulosis and prescribed antibiotics, bed rest, and a change of diet. All this Dawn did, and it seemed to help.

While Dawn was recuperating, I had recorded a song, Please, say you'll love me forever. I had hoped to record it with Dawn, but I did it as a single because of her health problems. Once Dawn was rested, and well, I figured we could redo it as a duet. Anyway, when it was finished, Alex released it as a single. I figured if we won a Grammy, it would give the song a boost. However, that isn't what happened.

The day we were to attend the Grammys, Dawn complained of a stomach ache, and again I suggested that we skip the event. Dawn told me she would take some antacid, but we were definitely going. I wasn't happy but agreed to go as long as Dawn rested the whole day before the award ceremony. This she did. So, the night of the big event, we were both dressed to the nines. I had a tux on, and Dawn was wearing a beautiful light blue gown.

Before we left, I put the television on and tuned it to the station that would be carrying the Grammy Award Ceremony. I told my parents that Allison could stay up until nine o'clock that night. I was hoping that she would at least see us on the red carpet before the event.

As we were pulling up in front of the theater, I could see that Dawn was pale, but she insisted that we should go in. I should have put my foot down and told the driver to take us to the hospital. When I suggested it, Dawn refused but agreed to go to an urgent care unit after.

When we were about halfway down the carpet, we were asked if we'd give a short interview. Dawn eagerly agreed because she knew that Allison would be glued to the television at home. But as the reporter asked his first question, Dawn turned pale and began to crumble. I quickly grabbed her and lifted her into my arms. Hustling back toward the street, I hoped to find our limousine, but it was long gone. Fortunately, I came upon a policeman and begged him to call an ambulance. Five minutes later, we were on our way to the nearest hospital.

Dawn disappeared down a hospital corridor where I wasn't allowed. Instead, I was directed to a waiting room. I've never been so scared and distraught in my life. All I could do was pray and cry.

About two hours later, my parents and Clair arrived with Allison bundled up and asleep. My mother pulled me into a hug, and I cried on her shoulder for a long time. When I had no more tears, I took Allison and held her in my lap. Three hours later, a surgeon came out to talk to us. He explained that Dawn's intestines had ruptured. They had to remove about four inches of the lower intestine, and Dawn would have to wear a colostomy bag for a few months. But, right now, their biggest concern was the infection that had already spread to her abdominal cavity. If they couldn't control the infection, Dawn would die.

About six in the morning, Allison woke up in my arms and hugged me.

"Where's mommy?" she asked as she stared up at me.

"Your mom is very sick," I tried to explain with a voice choked with emotion. "The doctors are trying to make her better."

Allison hugged me. "Mommy told me that you were going to take care of us and keep us safe now. So, as long as you're here, I know mommy is going to get better."

I broke down again, and I guess I must have scared Allison because she began to cry also. My mother took her from me at that point, and I just sat there numb. Shortly after that, a nurse appeared in scrubs.

"The doctor said that you can see your wife for a few minutes."

I didn't correct the nurse and tell her that we weren't married yet. I was afraid that they wouldn't let me see Dawn.

She looked so small and frail lying in the hospital bed. I couldn't believe the number of IVs that were pouring antibiotics into her. When I sat down next to Dawn's bed and took her hand, she opened her eyes and smiled weakly at me.

"How do you feel?" I asked.

"I guess about as well as you look," she said with a scratchy voice.

"I love you," I told her as I kissed her hand.

"I love you, too," Dawn then went back to sleep.

They told me I could come back that afternoon for another visit. So, I gathered up my parents, Claire and Allison, and we went home. My mother made us breakfast, but I wasn't very hungry. Allison insisted on eating her breakfast sitting on my lap.

When Allison went down for a nap about nine-thirty, I crashed. I slept for seven hours. When I went back to the hospital by myself, Dawn was awake, but she looked so pale. For three days, Dawn ran a fever and slept most of the time. I was terrified that she was going to die.

Finally, on the fourth day, the fever broke. After that, each day, she got stronger and stronger. Eventually, we were able to take her home. Dawn needed a lot of help because just getting in and out of bed was a struggle. They had cut her stomach muscles, and you don't realize how much you use them until you can't.

The next four weeks were very hard for Dawn, and she was in a lot of pain. And I learned something about healing from major surgery. You don't heal at a steady pace. You can have three good days in a row and then feel like you haven't healed at all. But slowly, you do heal. However, there were days when Dawn would be very depressed, and she would break down crying. What made this sickness so severe is that about seven weeks after the first operation, Dawn had to have another to reattach everything and get rid of the colostomy bag.

The recovery from that second surgery was even worse than the first. Some days, Dawn was so depressed that I wondered if she would ever get better. But finally, after about three months, Dawn seemed strong enough to do something other than visiting the doctor. I decided that we'd have a picnic by the lake that was on our property. We had purchased fifty acres of land where we built our house. The contractor had dug a lake to use the fill to raise our house and surrounding area to the proper elevation. I invited my parents and Claire to join us. It was the first time that I saw Dawn truly relaxed and enjoying herself. Even though she just sat and watched what everyone was doing, Dawn was happy.

While we were sitting there watching Allison playing with my dad, Dawn turned to me. "I never asked about the Grammys. Did you win?"

I smiled at her and shook my head.

"Oh, I'm sorry," she said, looking at me to see if I was disappointed.

"I'm not."

"Why not?" Dawn asked with confusion flooding her face.

"Because if I had won, then there would be a ton of pressure for us to start touring again. I know that you wouldn't be happy with that, and right now, I'm not interested in doing anything except staying close to you and Allison. Alex has scheduled a concert for us toward the end of the year, but I'm not sure I want to do even that. We've also been asked to be part of a Christmas Special. That one, I definitely think we should do. They've asked if Allison could be part of it. I think it will be fun."

Dawn looked out over the lake and sighed. Then she turned to me with tears in her eyes, "Thank you for singing with me in Central Park."

With all the emotions swirling in me, all I could think to say was, "Thank you for letting me sing with you."

We were married four weeks after that picnic. It was a small service performed on our patio with just immediate family and close friends in attendance. I can't explain it, but this wedding made me happier than I had ever been in my life. I was even happier than when I married Tanya. I guess I always felt that Tanya didn't feel the same way as I felt about her. I believe deep down, I was always afraid that she would leave me. When that actually came to pass, it was perhaps the saddest day of my life. But as they say, when God closes a door, he opens another one. Tanya closed one door, and Dawn opened a new one for me.

I had been so consumed with Dawn and Allison that I hadn't paid any attention to anything outside my family. At our reception, people were asked if they wanted to share anything with us on our wedding day. Alex stood up and told everyone that my single, Please, say that you'll love me, had shot to number one on the country charts. He also told everyone that the song had crossed over to the pop charts and was sitting at number four. Our guests screamed their approval, and Dawn gave me the longest, most passionate kisses I've ever had.

Alex wanted us to go back on the road, but I adamantly refused. But it was Dawn who changed my mind. No, she didn't want to tour anymore, but she definitely wanted me to head back out, and she promised to come with me as long as Allison wasn't in school. Reluctantly, I agreed, but as I hit one stop after another, I was glad that Dawn had insisted. Whether it was a small nightclub or a large arena, I was met by enthusiastic, sellout crowds. And Occasionally, Dawn would join me on stage for a song or two. When she did that, the audience would roar with approval. But that happened only rarely. Still, I loved her for doing it.

Dawn did appear with me for the concert at the end of the year. It was sold out months before the performance. I even heard that people were scalping tickets for a thousand dollars or more. I didn't believe it until the police arrested one individual trying to sell three tickets for four thousand dollars.

The TV special called, A Down Home Country Christmas had Dawn and me performing with a half dozen other country groups. Since we weren't performing before a live audience, Dawn really enjoyed doing the show. The program was a monster hit, and Allison stole the show. She turned out to be a little ham with a beautiful voice. The program was first broadcast in the middle of December. But it was so popular that they rebroadcast it twice more before Christmas.

Immediately after, offers were flowing in for Allison to perform. Dawn and I absolutely refused to allow any of it. We weren't going to let the glitter of show business ruin our daughter's childhood. However, when she turned sixteen, we allowed her to record her first single. It went platinum in no time. However, Dawn and I were united in not allowing Allison to tour until she turned eighteen. We did, however, relent on one performance each year. We allowed Allison to join us for the Country Christmas show. Allison looked forward to it each year, and it became a holiday tradition for us and the viewing audience.

Eleven months after Dawn and I married, we welcomed Trey Robert to the family. Fifteen months later, Cassandra joined us. Allison turned out to be like a second mother to both of them. And as soon as they could talk, Allison was organizing shows which featured all three of them. Dawn used to roll her eyes every time Allison announced that they had a new show, but I loved them.

I recorded ten more songs, some of which did very well and others only so-so. But after twelve more years of doing concerts, I was growing weary of the travel and the time away from my family. Dawn had been fabulous about my desire to perform. Whenever the kids weren't in school, they all joined me if I was on the road.

Our fifty acres had grown to seventy-five acres, and the main compound was walled and gated. We also had twenty-four-seven security guards to discourage overzealous fans. As I was approaching my forty-fifth birthday, I was down to doing only seven or eight concerts a year. Dawn, on the other hand, limited her performing almost exclusively to the Christmas show. Yet, occasionally, I could still coax her on stage to do a few songs with me. When that would happen, the audience would still go absolutely crazy.

As my schedule was beginning to wind down, Allison's was cranking up. She would do three major tours a year and sprinkle in charity concerts and television appearances. Over the years, I had written most of the songs that Allison had recorded to great success, but I was now recording very little. Alex was still my manager, but he was training his son, John, with the idea that he'd take over someday. Even though Alex is seventy-eight years old, I'm not sure when he will finally retire.

My dad died three years ago, and now my mom and Claire share a condo. They are thick as thieves, spending their days going from one thrift store to another. They started doing that years ago. My father never complained because almost everything they bought went to one charity or another. His only complaint was that they never seemed to distribute what they bought as fast as they acquired it.

I do want to share one funny thing about my first wife, Suzie. When Tanya dumped me, and it hit the news, Suzie sent me a postcard with a picture of her husband's latest dealership. It said:

"I may have gained a few pounds, but you've lost about a hundred and twenty pounds -- your wife. You are such a loser. Suzie

When I married Dawn, I sent Suzie a postcard of my own. It was a picture of Dawn and me just after we got married.

Suzie,

Sorry it's taken so long for me to respond. Thank you for your concern during my difficult times. I have to admit that you were right, but about the wrong thing. I was a loser for marrying those hundred and twenty pounds, not for losing her. As you can see, I replaced those hundred and twenty pounds with a hundred and ten pounds of pure love.

And Suzie, really, a few pounds? I think you need to buy a new scale.

Robby

I truly regret all the time I spent trying to destroy Tanya's career. In truth, it was never mine to make or break. But in my single-minded obsession for revenge, it wasn't Tanya who suffered; it was Dawn. I drove everyone to chase a dream that really wasn't even mine. My grandfather was right; it almost cost me the most important thing in my life -- Dawn.

As I said, I had very little if any influence on Tanya's career. In the end, it was as I believed; she didn't have the talent to make it to the top. She did score some hits with my stolen songs. Tanya also had some minor hit with songs that were written for her and some that were stolen for her. I'm not going to mention the titles, but one made it to number seven on the country chart, and the other three cracked the top twenty.

As the years passed, I ran into Tanya from time to time. She was even one of the opening acts for two of my shows. When I was first told Tanya was opening for me, I was going to nix it. But Dawn convinced me to let her perform. She said it would be a way to get closure. I did sing with Tanya during both those shows, but I refused to do Patsy Cline's True Love with her. That was a song that I now would only do with Dawn.

Tanya and I talked for a little bit after the second show.

"Robbie, I know saying I'm sorry doesn't mean anything now, but I am," Tanya said contritely.

"You're right; it doesn't mean anything now," I responded. "However, I've long since gotten past what went on between us. When my first wife dumped me, I thought my life was over. Then I met you, and we got married. And that wouldn't have happened if Suzie hadn't divorced me. The same thing happened when you dumped me. If you hadn't, I never would have met Dawn or had the career I've had. So as far as I'm concerned, it's all good."

"However," I said with a sigh, "there is one thing that I am still a little upset about. I assume that you destroyed the original copies of my songs that you stole."

Tanya nodded. "I couldn't take the chance of them being found."

I should have been angry with Tanya, but I just couldn't muster the energy. Tanya had been burning up most of her life with the fever to be famous. She had been chasing a dream that was never going to be hers, and she let the rest of her life slip away from her. Sadly, she is still chasing it today. And I have no doubt that if Tanya had the opportunity to steal more songs from me, she would do it in a heartbeat.

But these days, Tanya is losing ground. Age is beginning to take its toll as it does on all of us. Of course, I can't criticize her too much because I chased the same dream for a few years. But I wasn't chasing stardom for myself; I was just doing it to rub Tanya's nose in my success. And now I just can't bring myself to lord it over her.

The futility of what I was doing was driven home to me when Dawn got so sick. I had been so consumed with my revenge that I lost sight of what was most important. I finally gave up trying to have a bigger and better career than Tanya. And the funny thing is, as soon as I gave up trying to be a superstar, I became one.

I have to admit that I don't like being a celebrity. Being famous isn't anything like what people think it is. It's hard for me to go anywhere without being recognized. I've taken to wearing disguises when I want to go out in public, especially with Dawn. She thinks it's hilarious and is very amused by each new disguise. Still, they work fairly well. However, if I stay out too long, someone always seems to recognize me.

I was looking forward to getting home after a long hard tour. However, I had one last show to do, and it was at the Stagecoach Festival in California. I was one of the headliners for the show, but I figured it would be an easy gig. I only had to sing two songs, and then I'd be on my way.