The Guitar Player Ch. 06

After I got the recorder going, I looked at my three grandchildren as they stood in their cribs, smiling and giggling at me as I strummed my guitar. I sang a few nursery songs until they lay down and watched me through the crib slats. And then, one by one, they drifted off to sleep. As they were just drifting off, I decided I would sing songs their parents had made popular, and I would sing songs Dawn and I had done well with. I also decided to intersperse it all with funny stories about their parents, Dawn, and me.

Dawn

Tears began to flow down my cheeks as I read the last part of Robby's journal. I remembered the next morning when I awoke and found that Robby hadn't come to bed. I found him still in the chair beside his grandchildren. But when I went to wake him, I found that Robby was gone. The coroner said that sometime during the night, he had suffered a massive heart attack.

Robby had been partially right about our reaction to what he had been doing in secret. We were terribly sad and disappointed when we learned what Robby had been doing, but only because it was a secret; we wished he had shared with us. The secret that Robby was so afraid that I would learn was that he had cancer. He had successfully battled it when it was first discovered. However, the cancer came back. But at the same time, it was determined that Robbie needed open-heart surgery. The doctors determined that they needed to fix his heart first and then begin treatments for the cancer. But Robbie's heart gave out before anything could be done.

The tears were now pouring down my cheeks. God, I wish he had told me, so I could have been there for him during what must have been a terrifying time. But that was Robby. From the first time we sang together in Central Park, he had always tried to protect me.

The family was devastated, but we were stunned by the outpouring of sorrow from all of Robby's fans. Thousands upon thousands of floral arrangements began to appear around our front gate. Thousands of people came by for weeks to leave mementos, flowers or sing some of Robby's songs. I know that the outpouring wasn't as large as when Elvis Presley died, but it was close. Many radio stations across the nation devoted a whole day to playing nothing but our family songs. But I didn't notice most of it because I was so inconsolable. It took months before I could function at all.

The recording of Robby singing to his grandchildren was taken by Alex, and he had it released as an album. It shot to number one on both the country and the pop charts. It stayed at number one on the country chart for six weeks and at number one on the pop charts for eight weeks.

I'm doing better now, but sometimes, I'll think of Robby and start crying all over again. But those times are fewer and farther between. Right now, I'm focusing on the fact that both Allison and Jenny are pregnant again. I can't wait for the babies to be born, but a little part of me is sad that Robby will never get to meet them, and they will never have an opportunity to know their grandfather. Damnit, just thinking about that has me crying again. Oh God, Robby, I miss you so much.

Thanksgiving is right around the bend, and then the Christmas season will be upon us. The Network is already prepping for our annual Christmas show. The television people think that this year's show may have the largest audience we've ever had. And as much as I hate performing, I can't wait to do this show. Still, it will be so strange without Robby there, but I know he'll be watching, and I know that he will be smiling.

Robbie used to say that he was just a guitar player who liked to sing, but he was so much more. I love him so much, and I'll miss him terribly.