All Comments on '...the Harder they Doll'

A much different approach than most. Quite enjoyable. Since they are both "innocents", I do not want to see them trapped. I wonder if she could command him to hack back into the system. He still has his intelligence, just no motivation. I am sure there could be other adventures, and maybe her changing too. Thanks for the story!

Very well written, with an interesting premise. Will there be a second chapter?

Thank you both of you! I think the sequel depends on feedback and ratings... If there is enough interest, there will be more, I have an outline...

(Spoiler ahead: she will get them as well as part of a deal... But they will be linked, they can never be normal together. The bigger one is, the smaller the other will be.)

WOW !

Talk about the impossible !

But this is fantasy land.

Quite a writing !

I would ask that you try to cut back on the over use of the word "AND".

You can make the story flow so much better if you use different conjunctive words. The word AND is necessary in some places, but you have relied on it far too heavily. Expand your vocabulary with the use of a thesaurus. I suspect you will much more enjoy your writing if it does not sound so repetitive with the conjunctive AND after AND after AND.

This is simply a comment trying to help a dedicated writer make better writings.

I am not trying to trash your ability. You have a great imagination. You have great direction.

You just need to make the writing sound less like it was written by a third or forth grader by using more adult terminology to connect sentences.

Please continue the story !

Yes, let’s see where you go with this?

If my girlfriend has something like that I told her to call my boss and give him the application and tell him I want to be a pinball that I will do what he wants me to do has a pinball including sucking his cock and I like to have at least 40 double t for breasts

I marked myself and tried to stay up with the trigger words.... was a fun read and a fun ride

Yes please

Great story, would have loved it if stuck at DD the J was almost creepy to me.

PART 2?!?!?