All Comments on 'The Hollybrook Witches'

Great story but who the fuck is Oscar? Did he die? I take it the MIL knew? So many questions. Great story as always.

Thank you. It’s been a while but always worth the wait.

Would have liked to know what happens in the divorce. I know that it is not really part of the story but it would have been nice to know.

You had a damn fine story going until you lost interest and truncated the ending.

Excellent piece of work! 5*

A masterful effect ruined by running the ending into a rock wall head first.

That was very strange…but very well written and entertaining!

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5 *****

So apparently his loyal loving faithful wife decided that what she really wanted and needed was to have her cake and eat it too. And her turning into a selfish deceitful arrogant whore never affected her character, her nature, her values, her attitude, her behavior? Wow! You would think someone morphing from virtuous wife to guiltless slut might affect her relationship with her husband, just a little bit? So she would just change from Dr. Jekyll wife to Mr. Hyde whore, and back, and hubby never had a clue. And she wasn't a tiny bit sorry, until she got caught? And she apparently has told her whole family, and they are on her side? Preposterous, even silly.

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The wife is a selfish ruthless monster. She has no guilt, no remorse, and only one regret, that she got caught. She will pursue every possible method and opportunity to make his life hell, deny him his divorce and his daughters, and bring all the weight of "enlightened new age polyamory" philosophy to harangue him. Hell, she'll probably convince the University that this monogamous conservative dinosaur will be a negative influence on the new age thinking appropriate of modern academia. The happily ever after you try to end with is as unbelievable as the wife whoring for years under his nose without the husband's instincts and discernment alerting him. He was the House Husband! Where did she keep the slut clothes and the underwear he discovered, the stiletto shoes, the jewelry, the gifts, the perfume, the butt plug and the nipple clamps?

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Really, it was a fun read. But at least Stevenson had the honesty to explain the magic potion, and reveal the monster for what it was. The whore in this story will only be sorry her fantasy fuckathon got spoiled. I suspect she'll get over it rather quickly. Thanks for the effort.

Gosh, that was a wonderful story. I loved the theme and the characters were unique and vibrant. It was a "loving wives" tale like no other, by a writer like no other.

So very well written. It was a joy to read after all of the dreck that has been prevalent on this site. Thanks

Shit ending 1*

Excellent story! Not really my cup of tea but very well written, loved it really! 5 BIG ASS FUCKING HUGE FLAMING NOVA STARS! Yes, also a BIG ASS thank you.

Fix the ending. Honestly nothing worse than a shit ending with hardly a confrontation with the ex wife and what happens after.

A superb story steeped in history and mythology.

I loved it! Thank you for sharing.

An old curmudgeon

Completely immersive. I thought it would be hokey, but it was so well written it managed to remain a pleasure. 5 stars.

Like others, I really loved this story, but it just stopped. What happened to his wife? For that reason, I can only score a 4.

Great story but the ending was a little hard to swallow.

would love to read an aftermath on this one

Exceptional!

Great story - loved it. Mysterious.

Enjoyable and interesting plot. The closing sequence was a little rushed and leaves some loose strings. I would hope for more perhaps…. But 5 stars for what it was.

Excellent story!! RG never publishes anything that fits into any preconceived box, niche, or pigeonhole. That, my friends, is talent.

Started awkwardly but turned into a good story before a rushed ending. Overall a nice read.

This really was the story about the manipulative“ex” from hell, both figuratively and literally.

1) Makes the protagonist magically attractive, so that his future wife gets into him, even though he would normally not check her boxes (has a lot to do with her cheating later on). Which actually makes no sense as she admits she was always pining for him and wanting him for herself.

2) Does the reverse of passing another man’s baby as your husband’s. The two girls seem to obviously be Essie’s babies that the poor mother cannot relate to and bond with. Even if one argues protagonist is a warlock and it is his genetics, Essie allowed the wife to have non human babies without her consent.

3) Essie made herself their neighbor. She always wanted the protagonist, and had manipulated things on her and his favor, so what else did she do to mess with their marriage? Postpartum depression her? Setting her up with Carl her? Did she pretend to be the wife’s therapist or friend who encouraged her to cheat?

4) then this other woman pining for her husband all those years not only takes her husband away, but her kids too.

5) uses her powers to manipulate the system to get the husband to get a job he admits he isn’t qualified for. Doing a disservice to others who want that job, and the students who are getting a less qualified teacher.

Take the supernatural element out of it and reverse the genders. There is this man pining for your wife for years and years. He moves next door to have more access to everyone. Constantly does little things to manipulate the relationship in the background. Sets the husband up for failure, then swoops in and steals the wife and the husband’s kids from him.

That is why a good writer can manipulate the reader. He can get you to root for a manipulative ex witch there to destroy a spouse and children away.

And for those who say, but she told the wife she gave her lots of chances to not mess up, Alex Murdaugh is more believable and has less motivation. She admits she had pined for and been waiting for him for over a century. That she moved right next door waiting for him to grow up. That she manipulated things in her favor many times.

Btw, this is not a critique of RG. I gave the story 5 stars, and like everyone else thought the ending was abrupt, but otherwise a very good story. However, the story also shows how easily a reader can be swayed. We end up literally rooting for a manipulative ex.

Ultimate manipulation . Why doesn’t she just reveal herself to the protagonist before he meets his wife? She obviously wanted him for a very long time. I would only assume because he likely would have rejected her back then. You are a what? How old are you? F off. But he has heartbreak now, and is on the rebound. He has kids he loves very much who are just like the “ex.” She uses the wife to push him towards her.

FINISH THE DAMN STORY. Need the aftermath. Maybe even some magic revenge. WTF WAS VERY GOOD . THEN NOTHING. FINISH IT!!!!!!!!!

Agree with bigfundrew, series here.

Noooooo! Fantastic tale but I can't believe you are going to leave us hanging, I need more.

As I have come to expect, yet another masterful story! I agree with other commenters that this could be the start of a series.

As with most of his work I enjoyed this story by RichardGerald. A little more retribution on the wife and her lover, yes, but Edward has a good future ahead of him, and isn't that the best revenge? 5 stars

Fantastic tale, boy I miss the good writers like yourself! You could go on for several chapters iwth this one, but I get why you would leave it here. I do think the custody of the girls is not as clear as presented, if Lucy fights. Also, her justification for cheating was a bit lame? Could it be that simple, she wanted to feel desirable?

I’ve missed your work RG….. thanks!

TK

i wish you would make a second part to relate the aftermath.

Interesting story that had a damp squib of an ending: disappointing! And who is Oscar and why was he there at the denoument? Too many loose ends for me, I'm afraid.

Fabulous start. Can't wait for the next installment!

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Writing is excellent but like one person the dreams and witches plus he was wimp he should have burned the bitch and beat the asshole in the hotel to a pulp but then maybe he didn't really love his wife like he should have.

Very much enjoyed this tale! Felt there could be more. Wishing for another chapter with slightly more closure. But, I still loved reading this story very much. Thank-you for your talent

I’M NORMALLY A GREAT FAN OF YOURS—BUT THIS ONE… NOT SO MUCH. IT STARTED GREAT BUT THE ENDING IS VERY DISAPPOINTING.

ANYWAY, THANK YOU FOR THE MANY HOURS OF PLEASURABLE READING YOU HAVE PROVIDED OVER THE YEARS. NO SCORE CD

Ending was an incomplete ending! Way too many possibility. Leaving it to the reader to conceive the ending is NOT satisfactory. What went from 3-4 screens of reasonable and interesting reading to a tale scoring something between a sorry "1" and a slightly better "2."

No one can tell a story like RG. No one. 5*

A very engaging story, that built from a dream or nightmare, where he was actually getting a message from years ago to his ancestor, and found that he had the soul if that long-dead relative within himself.

Very well crafted, with a hint of a cheating wife, fitting well into the LW category.

Being honest, I originally thought his wife was going to be the witch, explaining her rapid success in business and that his dream was warning him away from her.

The ending tied it all up into a neat package, but if you write a continuation, the twins' coming of age and gaining their powers could be an interesting story to be told...

5 stars from here.

crap ending! would have been a 5....but....i wont rate it. your stuff is always good. much appreciated.

Agree with Tajfa. It feels unfinished. Your writing is excellent as always and your story telling superb. But an unfinished story does not deserve a five. I’ve learned a good ending can be hard to come by.

Needs a proper ending... The story just stops. No confrontation, no conclusion, just stops. For that reason - 3 stars.

->VERY<- well done!

IMHO, there is no need to tie up any loose ends. Lucy has lost; we see the finale. (It would be interesting to find out where Oscar fits.)

Disappointed. After all the fun and excitement of 'February' I started this with enthusiasm. It didn't last. Probably because I'm an old cynic I just don't get this weird stuff. In fact. I don't believe any of it and can't see any point in writing about it.

Robinhod

What fine storytelling. Will there be more of this story? I hope so. I see adventures.

I was totally into this story. The sudden stop was like having cold water thrown on you. Great writing as always. I look forward to reading more when you have the time.

Not a cliff hanger, just a cliff. that is way to abrupt for a Richard Gerald story

I realize that writing stories on here to the author is like Mozart fiddling with chopsticks for fun ( note,the theme for Twinkle Twinkle Little Star was written by Mozart) but still I found this amazing. I liked the oddball ending it tied the pieces together.

Like others though the ending was too abrupt. You have to figure being with a witch that the wife wouldn't end up well with trying to get custody or the like. Not to mention that he would have a case to get the therapist license revoked, by encouraging her to cheat like that would be a breach of ethics a mile wide bc it was telling her to do something she knew would cause harm.

And if the wife's mother, who knew the grandmother was a round heels, would approve of her daughter sleeping around that needed to be in the story I think. I realize the supernatural is the theme, and it was well written, but the ending was just too shortened. At the very least the wife realistically would realize what she lost and her confronting that is good drama. When she said she loved Frank, that really showed how bad she was as a person and the reader will want to see her confront the truth, plus it also would be interesting to see the mother and sister try to justify their actions.

Btw the fact ppl are complaining about the ending says how good the story was,some stories a bad ending and you say 'eh,whatever'.

Wow, great story. Certainly complete in itself, but begs for a sequel. Did she realize that she was telling him he bored her? The women in your stories are so carelessly cruel. Unfortunately too much like real life.

What is this?

Why aren't you charging money??

I guess I'll read the story and find out...

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You know my name🥳

Great write and a great read. Thank you.

Like CwG, I was a little perplexed by many of the commenters who figured that Ed wouldn't end up with the twins. But he will, plus more. Why? - Because Esse is a witch who is able to make things happen that may not normally happen (like Frank suddenly tripping and smashing his head onto the table) so supernaturally guiding a court judgement in Ed's favor is expected and is perfectly possible in this story.

I can also imagine Esse making Lucy's life as miserable as possible. Think of it as having a martian witch ray to counteract the slut ray.

Outstanding story. Supernatural is not my preferred genre, but all the bits fell together just naturally. If ever a tale needed a second chapter, its this one.

Very good and original story!!! Well done!!! I would have loved a bit more detail at the end... wife, Frank,....

Great story!!!! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Very interesting story! I can see why others thought the ending was truncated.

5

You had me in your spell. I hope you will continue your tale as I am “hooked”. ******. Thank you for sharing.

Considering how long you took to get us there, the ending was so rushed that it appeared you gave up and someone else wrote the ending. Could have been a 5, but it ended on a 3

Great story 5*****

I loved the story and everything that happened to the end

What happened to the soon to be ex wife and the band of lovers.

Done need to finish so that the readers can just use our imaginations

Thanks

A very well told story with only one catch, it has no real ending! But I've found that some authors aren't brave enough to write their own "endings" and prefer to leave that burden to the reader. "Outsourcing" is what they call it nowadays! So why the risk of a bad rating when you can dismiss the problem!

Not really a happy ending. He's leaving to live with powerful beings who can manipulate him as they want and don't really care about his consent.

Good story nonetheless.

Really nice story, really abrupt ending hurts it though. Should have included the confrontations with the MIL and the others involved. Both good and bad. Solid 4 could have been a 5 with a more finished story. Hopefully a part 2 is the plan. If not, it should be.

a fine piece of work

Well this could continue, i’d like to hear more of this emerald eye witch….. i’m hoping shez accesorized like Elvira😍

Very nice lead in to a bushel of story possibilities. The story of his ancestors, the aftermath and lots of opportunity to fill in around Esmerelda. please continue. 😁 5 ⭐️

RG a sure 5* dropped to 4* due to the "RUSH TO END". You wrote four long pages with a good slow build up to just end it so abruptly?

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He will get his tenured professorship at BC, but will the Courts grant him primary custody of twin 5yr old girls??? How much of a pain will Lucy be for Edward? Or will the witches squash Lucy?

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4****, Hooyah, should have been 5* but RUSH TO END, killed that

Another entertaining story by one of the most gifted storytellers in this site, RichardGerald. They are all fun to read, and somehow they leave you thinking about the plot and those things not writen in the paper, but implied by the story. Thanks for the interesting tale of love, betrayal and witches.

An excellent 5* tale from one of the top authors in LW marred by an overly abrupt ending

I’d have preferred to have read this 6 months from now with a fully fleshed out ending

Wow!!

Well done. Enjoyed it immensely.

Thank you for a favorite

The writing is excellent, lending the reader a sense of the disjointed sensations Edward was feeling. The choice to end so abruptly is... Let's say bold. I don't know if it worked in this case, but a shot not taken never hits.

Regarding the comments about the therapist losing their license: no. Therapists are responsible for their clients, and absolutely no ethical review would find that Maggie acted inappropriately. Her client was suffering from depression, she helped her escape it. It is not the therapist's responsibility to coach the client on moral matters, because therapists are not moral arbiters. No one was killed, and no direct harm was inflicted on a child or someone infirm, which are the only ethical redlines in Massachusetts that mandate reporting.

Agree with so many others, very good story, abrupt ending. Add that second part, we all need it. And I’m sure you need to tell it.

When Lucy was explaining her infidelity, her reasoning was exactly like a woman in a RichardGerald story sounds.

My favorite writer.

Had me enthralled. Thanks for the escapism from the reality of life. I look forward to further chapters. The wife[ ex?? ], mom in law , sister, lover.... all can to be expanded upon. And what did the psychologist say to Lucy so that the final consultation left him uneasy. Aahh the potential here is limitless :)

I disagree with the literalists. The ending is perfect. This is one of the best pieces of storytelling I have ever read on Lit. The plot is complex and interwoven. The characters are real, even the supernatural ones. This is a stupendous work.

WOW !! 5* enough said.

Ha ha a second part, and you claim to know the writer! want part two go write it yourselves....

Nice story, but the ending was a little abrupt

Very, very well done. Tight and finely crafted. However, there were several jumps that were a bit jarring (but, surprisingly, the ending was not one of them) so that this reads like a condensed version of a richer, more fantastic tale.

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The reader needs to understand the parallels of the story within the story: of the discovery of the witches (the discovery of the affair), the panic of the townspeople (Lucy), the death of the witches (the death of the marriage) and the death of Edward Good and the flight of Esse and the chaos that ensued with the storm (the flight of Ed, Esse and the girls). This sudden departure after the build up is the entire theme in the story, and that so many miss it makes me wonder what people are paying attention to when they read this.

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I honestly wouldn't change anything, other than the name "Esmeralda", unless RG is tipping his love of "Bewitched" just a little too overtly. In that case, I would've laughed if Ed was a Darren instead.

Cracking story, loved it well done.

I think "enthralling" is a good word to describe this story.

Since this story is part of an event with a deadline I suspect the author ran up against the deadline and needed to complete the story so it could be posted. Hence the abrupt ending.

Excellent, but I do wish the ending had more to it. *5* all the way. Thanks for a great read!

Exactly what I expected.

Why are you slumming with the no-payment crowd??

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AMerryman

Very good. Even though the story had witches in the name I never picked up on the happenings as being controlled by witches, but then again I have always been a little dense at picking up on subtle hints especially from the female of the species. A good story but it always brings to mind that old axiom: "Women, you can't live with them and you can't kill them!" A necessary evil I guess. 5 stars, maybe there really are witches considering what's happening in this particular era of controlled speech and removing words and symbols from our society that are perceived to hurt some ones sensitive feelings. But that's another story.

Awesome story! A bit of an abrupt ending; yet, sufficient. Thanks for sharing.

Excellent. The ending was perfect. My profound thanks to a skilled author for the entertainment.

Awesome story yet again. 5 star work.

Hooked

Excellent!

My complements on weaving the 'spells' so seamlessly into reality.

Excellent story, nicely paced and the ending wasn’t telegraphed, although it wasn’t hard to guess that the wife was going to be a cheater. 5 ⭐️ Thanks for writing and posting, cheers Ppfzz.

Damn this needs to be continued, so much potential!!! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Very nice and well-written tale that left me a little sad but happy that he and the girls have another chance. Thanks for writing and participating in the event.

This was a breathtaking story-and then there came that "confrontation" with wie and the lovers-group....

Sorry RG, were you out of time? I ve Reader you do a lot better.

I beg you, delete the last 17 paragraphs, work them over, and then make a series out of it.

Wonderful story, but needs a finish. I for one hope there's another chapter at least. Five stars.

Welcome back RG! Glad to read another tale from you. I liked it for sure, but it did seem a bit unbalanced. It started with a loving commitment, and then the emotional component just drained away toward the end of the story. It felt like he turned into some kind of robot, like he didn't even care his wife was cheating. Meeting Esse seemed to have no emotional component at all. It went from paranormal to abnormal for me from an emotional perspective. Would love to see this expanded and revised because there are some great bones and elements here.

Wow! That was well worth the wait! 5* story. I'd like to learn what happens next, but then, I'm just a greedy reader.

Great fun! An evolution from dream to a new reality. I disagree on abrupt ending. A 10 from me and anonymous, I forgot I’d not signed in.

Wow when I read one and my guts twist I know it will stay with me. Well done

An amazing story! Original, engrossing, and powerful. I am a huge fan of RG's work, and this one lives up to his best. Yes, the ending is short and sweet--but what's really left to be said?

Thank you so much for your great stories! ohio