The Honey Dew List

"You weren't so formal last night, lying in our arms as we shared you, babe. Yes, you had all three of us, and we're not going anywhere! Before you protest, though, I'd suggest that you take a damn good look at your new 'honey-do' list, the one that you swore to follow if within reason. I think that this is quite reasonable myself. Don't you agree? Besides, the wildest deeds are already done. You've fucked me, my sister, AND my mother, and boy did you give it your all!" Cassidy told him, pulling off her apron to stand nude with the other Lassiter girls.

"I ... I agreed to sleep with your sister and mother? Who else?" Damien gulped in shock, as Cassidy pulled the list up closer to his face and showed the rest of the "honey-do" assignments.

They were: Cassidy's cousin Emmanuelle, her best friend Vera, and to make a huge shock to the system, her gay male friend Umberto ... and Damien's own sister ... Stephanie. The color drained from Damien's face as he realized that he had given his word to have gay sex and commit incest, both things that he had secretly fantasized about, but never dared to tell a soul. Cassidy smiled impishly and licked her lips as she closed in for yet another kiss to his open mouth.

"Don't worry, dear. I chose well. Umberto's a bottom. Trust me on that. Your fine, manly ass can be as virgin ... or not virgin, as you wish it to be. As for Stephanie, well, she's wanted you for years and vice versa. I've watched your body language around each other, when each of you thought that the others weren't looking. You just didn't realize that it was mutual. Now that we're starting over, though, I was inspired to think of your needs and hers ahead of mine. She won't be a threat anymore and you can have your precious sister, who hasn't had a real boyfriend for years, because she's pining for you. Incidentally you might want to talk to her about her secret career in porn. Yes, porn, honey. It was her way of making money and getting her needs met while waiting for you to open up to her. What would Joseph and Hortense Martin have to say about that?" Cassidy announced while plating the meal with her mother and sister.

Breakfast turned out to be pancakes with real butter and maple syrup, turkey sausage (Mrs. Lassiter, while rather lapsed in her Muslim faith, still hadn't taken to pork), scrambled eggs, and hash browns smothered in Monterey Jack cheese. The whole time that they all ate, of course, the Lassiter women all flirted outrageously with Damien, too, making no secret of their intentions to have a lot more sex with him in the future. They also told jokes and teased him in no small way until it was clear that he was now very much family in their eyes, married to Cassidy or not.

"It's not every family where one man services his future bride, mother-in-law, and sister-in-law, but then again, his future father-in-law was killed by his brother for fucking Aunt Cordelia. It seems that Dad was a bit angry at Mom for some reason, so he was easily seduced by Aunt Cordelia and cheated on Mom for the first time in their marriage. Uncle Payne found out and put a bullet in his head, followed by Aunt Cordelia's, and then his own. Then again, Uncle Payne really was a bit of a dick and Aunt Cordelia had wanted revenge on him. I don't blame her, either. Like I said, Uncle Payne was a dick. The only one that I sympathize with is Emmanuelle, our dear cousin. Hence why you, sir, need to take on the new role of head of the family ... man of the house. Including yours and hers," Cassidy implored her boyfriend with no small amount of passion, "Much of this occurred to me last night as I started planning my new list."

"Your father's reason was that I was, myself, something of a real bitch. I don't blame him at all. I was not always bad that way, but I had lost some respect for him after I saw the way that he let his brother push him around, and then things went downhill from there. It was only partly his fault. Quite a bit of it was mine. The double-murder-suicide-adultery scandal woke me up in a way that I didn't quite grasp before.

"Oh, and not to be too corrective, but your father wasn't that faithful to me all the time. Neither was I to him. We both cheated, but he was unlucky in falling for his vulnerable sister-in-law, who wasn't a bad person, just lonely and weak like your father. Overall, I was a pretty good wife to him for most of our marriage, things only declining later on, while he was a very wonderful husband and father to me. He just wasn't good at standing up to his brother.

"All in all, I still miss Leonard and I still feel some guilt for how I treated him at times. I'll carry that pain and shame with me into the grave. Even so, I have to go on living and I will do my best to be the greatest mother and grandmother I can be. That's what Leonard would have wanted, so I will honor his legacy. I'm not sure that he would have approved of our little arrangement here, but he would understand the motives behind it.

"Oh, and one more thing. Call me 'Mom', 'Mommy', or 'Mama, ' please. Especially in bed, before you ask. It's such a turn-on. Besides, I'm going to be your mother-in-law and it always seemed to me that you and Stephanie needed a motherly figure in your lives. Someone to give you unconditional love. Anyway, you know how much I've always liked you ... far more than any of their past boyfriends. I actively loathed Stanley, Cassidy's ex-fiance, for instance. This is just taking that fondness a step further than expected.

"Hey, I never claimed to be a good Muslim. I'm a horrible, rotten one, morally speaking. Not that I care. I love whom I love how I can love them, and if Allah really is a loving God, then He'll forgive and understand human needs," Maryam told Damien as she made out with him in front of her daughters.

"Religion's an accident of birth, anyway," Damien remarked casually, "Look at me. I'm descended from French Huguenots, grew up in the Presbyterian Church in rural North Carolina, and basically lost my faith even before my parents were killed in that plane crash six years ago. Such is life. Sad, but very real. They were on their way to their second honeymoon when they died in that wreck. We had drifted apart over religion, anyway, though Stephanie and I remained very close. She's slightly more religious, but I gather that won't be an obstacle with her, according to what Cassidy said. I always thought that the notion of predestination made God to be a real sadist in the extreme myself. I'm apparently not one of the elect, if they're right, and so fuck Calvinism, fuck Christianity, and fuck religion itself. I'll live my life as I damn well please."

"Here, here! To defying clergy, churches, mosques, and gods!" Tammy broke in at last, raising a glass of orange juice.

"My sentiments exactly," Cassidy added, before planting yet another kiss on Damien's lips.

"So, this list, there is no time limit set on it, I gather, because otherwise, I'm quickly running out of time to complete the rest of it," Damien observed while Cassidy kept making out with him and Tammy now moved to sit on his lap.

"No time limit at all, of course, because it's a long-term deal. As long as you keep screwing the people on the list, you're doing me, them, and yourself, a huge favor. Thus you're still keeping true to the spirit of your pact with me. When I decided upon this revised list, I meant it to be an ongoing thing. Mind you, I plan to write up shorter and more temporary lists, too, of the usual sort, but you probably expected that. After all, I still need your help around the house. Just not as much perhaps, assuming that we all live together. You're not opposed to moving in with my mother and sister when our lease expires, are you? We'll all be able to pull together better if that happens, if you're okay with that, of course," Cassidy proposed with a smile, while her mother and sister both batted their eyes at Damien.

"So, you want me to move in with you, call you 'Mom, ' and regularly sleep with you and your daughters. Talk about being welcomed into the family with open arms. I really should marry Cassidy, then, shouldn't I? Make it official that we're family. Then you'll both be in-laws, while she'll be my bride. Did you want Emmanuelle to move in, too? How about Stephanie? Umberto? Your BFF Vera?" Damien winked at them.

"We might need a somewhat larger house, but sure, why not? Oh, and I was thinking of a roving bed situation. You share one bedroom with Cassidy as far as your stuff is concerned, but you roam from one bed to the others in terms of spending the night. Imagine your future now ... an endless rotation of sleeping with Lassiter girls, making sweet love to each of us and snuggling up with us afterward. Imagine the holidays, nice and cozy, with no doubt of what your plans would be. Imagine curling up by the fireplace with so many ladies to keep you warm. Drinking hot cider while relaxing on the couch.

"Picture the massive suppers, every Thanksgiving and Christmas. I might be Muslim, albeit a rotten one, but I love Christmas! I've toyed with converting, but I'm not really keen on Christian dogma or morals, either. Just think of being the man of the house, having a harem of ladies ... and one gay man, mind you, to pleasure you and cater to your every whim. Granted, there will be mundane, dull, more pedestrian moments, less exciting and glamorous things like actual manly chores. Even so, we'll do a lot for you in return and not overburden you.

"I talked to Cassidy last night, by the way, and really read her the Riot Act on that front. A man like you deserves better treatment and will always get it from all of us in the future, I can promise you that. I swear, honey, this will be a dream come true for you. I made real mistakes in my late marriage to Leonard, mistakes that unfortunately, Cassidy drew the wrong lessons from in the recent past. I want to be clear that neither she, nor I, nor Tammy, will ever behave like that again toward the man in our lives. That man being you ... for all of us.

"Also, I'm going to talk to our probate lawyer and set up my will so that it is left jointly to you, Cassidy, and Tammy. All three of you deserve your shares, and while this reduces the assets going to my daughters, they both strongly favor this plan. So far, the estate, which amounts to more than six million dollars, is but a fraction of what Emmanuelle has already inherited from her father. It will be smaller once we expand and gain a grander house, but it will continue to accrue from investments wisely placed by yours truly. My late husband had many talents, but I had the gift for investing and building a fortune. He earned the money, but I increased it.

"The current house is not that bad, though. Just what Leonard wanted. It's just that now we can afford even more, and we have the motivation to do just that. Just something to think about, anyway. So, how about we table this discussion, lover, and you take your ladies to bed? I don't know about you, but I think that it's safe to say that we women all want to fuck you half to death. Consider it a preview of your new life as our family stud," Maryam told her future son-in-law, who had all but proposed to her daughter.

From the look of joy on Cassidy's face ... and Tammy's, as well as the way that Maryam caressed his arm, Damien had made the smartest move of his life in declaring his intention to marry into their family. He was about to be hip deep in pussy and ass, and the tears that streamed down each girl's face showed all too clearly that this was about more than sex. Whatever her flaws and blunders, Cassidy had caused Tammy and Maryam to love Damien almost as much as she did. For that alone, she was worth forgiving and granting another chance. Damien realized that he had reached a fork in the road, and while it wasn't the right path for everyone, he had found the highway that was perfect for him. He had chosen well and the rewards were about to last the rest of his life.

"What are your thoughts, baby?" Cassidy asked him as she put her arm around his waist.

"Just that I will probably look back on this as the greatest day of my life and the best decision that I have ever made," Damien smiled at her.

"Told you he was a smart one," Maryam told her daughter, making her laugh.

"That you did, Mom. That you did."