All Comments on 'The Journey Ch. 09'

OUTSTANDING; WELL WORTH THE WAIT! A nuanced & layered "happy ever after" ending; if nothing else, hope we might see Viv & Jane as bit players in some future story. I will confess to being disappointed that Megs didn't get the chance to go full B-52 carpet bombing on the redneck police.

It's OK to step back and recharge; your "body of work" puts you in the best of the best and speaks for itself. The discerning readers will appreciate your stories when they do appear. Take care of yourself and hope to see you again here in the not too distant future.

This was so worth the wait. Thank you, Megs and Addie were so well placed in this. Jack pointing out the PTSD was spot on. When Viv left I was worried where this was headed. Thank you BrokenSpokes for telling Vivs story. When I first met Viv in Wheels in Motion, she was a shallow self centered witch. As time passed, she came to be a very complex person who moved me in many ways. This story like many of your other stories deeply moved me. Thank you 5*'s

Knew you'd finish this sooner or later. I got derailed for a year during one of mine, and I'm still trying to get back in the groove properly. It's hard. Well done for getting there!

I promise to wait a whole week before I start pestering you about the next one.

Wwhy did it take me this long to realize who Jack was. This was so worth the wait. We all knew Addie would be the call, but including Megan was great too. Sorry for the writing issues. Hopefully they'll dissipate with time and love. Thank you for all the hard work that went into Viv and Jane's story!

#JusticeIsServed

This was a terrific and thoughtful conclusion to a great series. Thanks for sharing your talents with us all.

Great story and a good ending to it. The characters really came to life and their struggles were all too real. Jane's problem was all too common. Cornel West in his book Race Matters tells of being pulled over by a verbally abusive cop, and you mentioned the Professor Gates incident.

I quite understand the writing issue. I do some writing, though I don't claim to be as you as you. I go through spells where writing is easy, and others when I can't write at all. As good as you are, I hope you get your mojo back.

Thank you for writing and including the social injustices.

Glad to see this wrapped up. Great as always. Sorry to hear about your struggles in writing it. Just want to offer my encouragement that you are a great writer and your stories really bring the characters to life. I hope you can find it in you to continue sharing your stories but if you cannot, thank you for what you have already shared.

Utterly blown away by the brilliant conclusion to a riveting story. I too am a recovering alcoholic close to the end of my 20th year soon and the cliff-hanging end to #8 was just that: I was praying that Viv had the courage to reach out and ask for help.

She did and because of that she and Jane found their happiness.

Thank you for an absolutely riveting story of a deeply fascinating character.

I literally did a double take when this popped up - and then I figuratively did a little happy dance. It was a wait, but damn was it worth it. I was totally enthralled from the first line to the last. (The twisty and touching ending was perfect). To BrokenSpokes, all I can say is thank you, You have given us soooool much: with the BGU, Josette, Bootyshorts,etc. Many writers go their entire career without a single work that could match any one of BrokenSpokes’ consistently evocative and entertaining offerings. And a tip of the hat to BrokenSpokes’ support group. (Support groups being a beautiful theme running through the entire BGU series as well). I also concur that AwkwardMD is amazing; which is totally in keeping with the benefits of having a strong support group. I can only hope there is much more to come from all the talented writers in BrokenSpokes’ circle, and from BrokenSpokes herself. (I really want to believe their is a “Connie centric” story in the works.) Obviously all the stars for this closing chapter. 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Wow, just wow. You landed this beautifully. You have an amazing gift for story telling. I love the way you weave the issues that matter to you into the plot in such a way that they matter to us too, even if it wasn’t something we thought about much before. I’ll try and take some lessons in life as well as in my own writing from your work. I hope you can find your way back to your writing. Your stories give so much enjoyment to so many. Love and best wishes.

So happy, and relieved, the story did not end tragically. I got very attached to Viv and Jane, so this ending really worked for me.

I’ve loved all three threads in the Blue Girl Universe; you’ve gifted us with so much. I hope the writing comes back for you.

You landed this beautifully. I love the way you weave social issues into your story telling. I have so much enjoyed reading your stories, I do hope you find your way back to writing again. You’ve inspired me to have a go myself. Thanks for your hard work, you are a formidable talent. Love and best wishes.

Thank you.

This is absolutely the perfect ending for such an amazing story. You took us all on a wonderful journey through these 9 chapters. Viv and Jane are both drawn so well, but then you have such an amazing ability to create such incredible characters. As a psychologist, I really enjoyed how well you portrayed addiction, PTSD, 12-step groups, and psychotherapy. At times I felt like I was reading transcripts of actual therapy sessions. I also appreciate that you clearly did so much research into so many topics in order to create this story and these characters. Your effort is truly impressive.

You haven't lost your ability to write as this chapter clearly shows. In fact this is easily your best work here to date, and that's saying a lot as all of your other stories are so perfect. Don't be so hard on yourself, and don't ever tell yourself that you "suck." Be kind to yourself instead. You're a very talented and skillful writer. Don't put so much pressure on yourself. Finally, thank you again for sharing your wonderful creations with us.

Thank you for sharing, I hope your personal/writing struggles improve.

Thank you!

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟 👀 when I saw it this morning. Again it had all of the human a motion in the story that makes it easy to draw you in and make you think 🤔. Your a wonderful writer and looking forward to seeing more stories from you.

Vivian Estrella Esparza — captivating, complex, erotically charged; about to say enigmatic, but, no, she was crystal clear. It is all about her journey to the “other side” as you say — perfect metaphor for her tale. Like how you often share with us at the close of your pieces; personalizes our experience. And how you weave characters from different storylines — very much like a tapestry. Love your creativity; reread your pieces on regular basis just as I do AwkwardMD — the two of you created Vivian’s that truly resonate.

The Journey has meant so much to me personally and had such a profound impact for me. It makes me sad to see that it's over, but it's been such an incredible trip!! Even with the long cliffhanger it was so worth the weight, and such a surprise at the end!!

I'm so sorry to hear of your struggles with writing, your stories have brought me so much enjoyment and I hope that you find that spark again. Thank you so much for sharing your babies with us. ❤❤

The BGU has been quite the ride, and if this is the end, what a ride it’s been! Thanks for your contributions too these pages!

Thank you for a satisfying conclusion to this story, which is the best that you've written. I've waited patiently, because I never doubted that you would give us an ending. And, as I long hoped, Addison played a significant part. Now I'm sad because there is no more to read.

I totally agree that Vivian is the most interesting character that you have created. I have been fascinated by her from the earliest chapters, when I was still commenting anonymously. I'm glad she found her purpose.

One plot point is niggling me. How did Jane not realise that it was the time of Viv's weekly therapy appointment?

There are gaps in the two thousand three hundred and eleven days that I'd love to fill in, for which I'll just have to use my imagination. What was the wedding like? There was a wedding, right? Did Viv go and visit her mother? Is she now friendly with Addison? Probably not. From her conversation with Connie, it sounds like she's still bowling. How did she cope with being around booze while doing that? Perhaps she joined a sober team.

Don't ever tell yourself that you suck. Writing is hard! Good writing is harder! If it wasn't we'd all be doing it. I hope that now you've got this monkey off your back, you can recharge, and, when you are good and ready, there'll be another story in the BGU.

Thank you so much for sharing this story. Without doubt, you're a real "top draw" writer.

THANK YOU!

This was worth the wait. I wonder if the struggle writing this was because you feel so close to this character that you wanted this to be perfect for her. Perfectionism can be a b*%~h. By the way, this WAS perfect!!!

Heartwarming to see Viv and Jane in a good place at the end.

BS its hilarious trying to find words, writing sentences to honor your talent honor your ART writing …. I confess after eight chapters and some appearances in other tales, vivian like you mentioned it too became a warmhearted lovely girl searching for love and so i started reading this chapter with the last side ….. I couldn’t have read the chapter if viv would become a drunk again …. THANK YOU for this kind of happy ending …. Give people power and you recognize their true character, happen in the past nowadays and will be so in the future ….. but you made a extraordinary episode about such policeman and how viv jumped over the bottle to helping her love in the best possible art ….. im little disappointed, as i have been reading all of your tales and now? …. BS you’re exceptionally talented and im greatful being able to have reading all

Ten hearts for you 💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝💝✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨☘️🥰

Amazing!

Thank you!

Of course I don't know what is going on in your life no more than you do mine. But your stories have helped with mine.

I'm sending good energy towards you, (in my head and heart).

Thank you for this.

T

PS- You are very good! Don't let anyone tell you that you are not!

I waited, and I don't put comments often, but you are worth coming out of my introvert shell for.

That's so good. Worth the wait.

A wonderful conclusion to a wonderful and deep story. I don’t care how slow or fast you write — I know it will be worth it.

So. First off, the positive. I liked Viv's character development a lot. It was great watching her reform process and growing as a person. One of your best characters.

Second, the negative. I get the reasoning for wanting to do something social justicey in the wake of George Floyd, etc. But it was a bit too tumblr-y and preachy imo. The evil police were a such a caricature. Jane claiming that NYC is worse than DC for racism. (It isn't by a long shot.) Most of the real incidents happen to black men, not black women. It read to me more like a social media inspired morality play than any kind of attempt at understanding the real problems. So it missed the mark imo.

But in the end, it's fiction, and you do you.

A wonderfully strong ending, especially the way you tied in your other stories. Sorry to hear about why it took so long, but hopefully that demon is behind you and you can continue with such great stories.

Wonderful ending! I hope you don't ever lose your desire to keep writing. You are a wonderful storyteller and influence so many other writers!

Such a good story, thank you for posting it. I don't think I've ever seen a story cover so many issues. Viv is such a well written character. Please keep writing, your stories are so good.

I am an avid fan. You write something, I read it. I am not sure if the distance between chapters is the reason, or simply the "preachy" aspect of the story that turned me off. I just found page after page of "this is important stuff, and you need to read it" I understand that the police are not perfect, or that people have dull edges as well as sharp, It just seemed that your writing was on automatic, and you pushed this out, to end the story. Furthermore, I am in the minority, I get that. I just missed the page turners of your previous work more.

Thank you for the beautiful story. The ending was worth the wait.

Dear Broken Spokes. Thank you for making the time (or perhaps finding the determination) to complete Viv and Jane's story. I run a small writing group so I know only too well what it's like when you get to the 'I suck' part of writing and sometimes, with the pressures of life, work and family, it can take a while to get through that. I am so pleased that you did and, as others here have said, don't beat yourself up about it. You finished it. That's what counts.

And you finished it really well. I have enjoyed this latest story with your trademark highs and lows, your 'spot on' dialogue (which reads so well you could almost be listening to someone saying that sitting next to you), and characters, as always, that I want to invest in and see how they turn out. But I also enjoyed the social commentary side of the story too. I'm English, so I can't comment on what life is like in American cities, but even if things like this only happen to a relatively small number of people then it is right to draw attention to them and fiction is one of the most powerful ways of doing that. Well done for writing that, but thank you for writing it in a most engaging story.

P.S. I loved the end credits approach to give us an inkling of what happened to Viv and Jane after the story ends. Nicely done.

The confrontation between the attorney and the police who were holding Jane was one of the most SATISFYING scenes in literature I’ve ever read. Thank you. Of course, the rest of the story was masterful, too. More heart-rending (to me) than your other stories, but ultimately perhaps more satisfying. ❤️

Thank you thank you thank you! Your stories are so worth the wait. I’d like to say I’m sorry you had to struggle to bring this to fruition, but life is struggle and while I’m sure this is probably an improper generalization, those who never struggle to write aren’t very interesting. I am very happy that you share your talent with us and look forward to your next story. I really appreciate your taking on these topics and that you took the time and made the effort to address them in such a caring way.

This is a masterpiece, I am in awe.

Please don't listen to the hate some have said about the wait. Your words are a gift you have kindly chosen to give. I thank you for your time and kindness. I wish you luck in any and all future endeavors. I also enjoyed this conclusion and haveing Megs show up made me smile so hard my cheek started hurting. I may have to reread a certain story once again.

Each of your characters and stories have touched my life in various ways. I will forever be grateful to you for that. Your words have literally made my life better, Spokes. No matter what does or doesn’t come next, you will always have me not only as a life-long fan, but friend as well.

As an alcoholic, thank you for giving Viv a way out between 8 & 9. I don't think I could bear it if her next move was into a bar.

Your stories are beautiful, and you definitely don't suck. x

I was surprised to see two more chapters on this story. I'm one of those who thought it was strange to leave Dr. Jane in the back of a police car like that. Especially after you worked in updates to characters in other stories. In "Wheels..." we see that Jo and Blue Girl followed through with their plan to have a child, with help from Jo's late brother. And in this story we see that the Rotors remain an active cover band, even with their sound man in AA and not traveling with them anymore.

Weaving your characters in and out of each others' stories actually makes them more real, adding to those stories without the need to write a whole new episode.

When I started the journey I wasn’t quite sure what I would think of it; Wheels didn’t present Viv as a very interesting character, although that was in large part due to Addie both being the narrator and treating her rather badly. I often wondered if the finished story would be on par with Hard Landing, or possibly even surpass it. Though I feel I need to reread the whole story now that it’s complete, I do find that it is at least on par with it. Viv is definitely my favourite of your many wonderful characters — though I’m quite fond of Blue and Megan as well — and Jane is absolutely delightful; I love her analytical and structured mind — the moment when she makes a mental note to sit down and ponder her own preconceived assumptions and their causes at a more convenient time is just perfect. There are so many layers of greatness in your stories that it is hard to mention more than a few.

Although I’m sure the separation in the epilogue was meant to evoke Jane in the reader’s mind I must admit that my feeling was that the description practically screamed a child leaving the nest. After all, a parent’s duty is to spend eighteen years teaching their child how to leave them, to slightly paraphrase the wonderful JCMcNeilly. It didn’t quite rhyme with the six-years reference, but I thought the twist in the text from the implied Jane to their child would mean that Viv had relapsed during their time together, which wouldn’t be unreasonable — to err is human after all — a foster child solved that though, and was totally on point for Viv and Jane.

I liked the reference to one of my favourite Bramblethorn stories. And the Princess Bride really is a fount of wonderful quotes…

The movie end credits to your beautiful tale was a delightful and perfect finale to a truly wonderful story.

I hope your muse returns to you so that you can share more of your beautiful stories, and that you get the love and kindness you deserve.

All the best,

P.S.

So so good!

Vivs tale has everything, including more than a few few rears of my own! This story really reached me, it wasn't just about the sex, it was the life of a person. It was the struggles that everyone goes through to a greater or lesser extent.

It was Outstanding!

Thank you so much for sharing it with Us.

I hope you find your writing muse again and continue publishing many more stories! You are one of the most talented writers on this site.

Thank you!

Thank you for finishing this story. You handled many of our societies issues with impressive skill. I hope you have happy holidays and a great new year

Thank-you out for bringing this gripping and inspiring story to life. It has caused me to be introspective and thoughtful, provoking and enlightening my own views on race, for the better, and for that I thank-you. I remember when Viv first came into Addie's life, and I can't say I was a Viv fan, I thought she was bad for Addie and no peach herself. Thanks for giving Viv a chance and showing us all that we can, and should, strive to do better. I am sorry you've lost your writing mojo, but this final installment doesn't t lack any of your usual superb talent. I personally hope you get back to writing some day, as I love all of your work, so thank-you for the hours of enjoyment, and generally making the world a better place.

This was brilliant! Thanks so much for sharing. I really want to recommend it to students - please tell me it's available elsewhere?

Awesome! I will let it soak for a few days, then read it again. Thank you so much.

Read it again for the third time, what does that say? I'm sorry you feel you have lost your muse, don't believe that! It might have just gone into hibernation whilst you get on withother things that have comer inbto your life. Thank you for penning such compelling stories, so well researched and so "more-ish!"

I am in awe of your talent,

This was definitely worth the wait. Viv has gone thru a lot in this series and her being a better partner for the love of her life was the result.

After all this, I am now very curious about the next chapter.

No problemo.

Thank you for satisfying us, at last. I can only and pray that you are satisfied too, with all you need. Strength, inspiration, everything. I love you.

100% with the wait. I’m sorry to hear of your struggles with writing. Small consolation, but many great artists go through these struggles. You have provided some of the most compelling, meaningful and relatable reads onto this site. Please know you are highly regarded in this community. Thank you for your work. This story along with the others is a jewel!

After just reading this in a single sitting, all I can think of is...wow. There were three things that touched me the most in this chapter:

1. Vivian making amends (and by extension, peace) with Addison.

2. Viv becoming a Sponsor herself to help others, just like Jack, Charlie and Patricia had helped her.

3. Viv and Jane taking in foster children from humble backgrounds to take care of them.

By the end of it all, I found myself tearing up in joy. Something no other Story on Literotica has achieved so far.