All Comments on 'The Kiss of the Count'

You were doing so well too. Keep in mind I did like the story, but this shit aggravates me to no end.

There is no membrane covering a woman's vagina that has to be torn away. If there were, there'd be no way for a virgin to have her period. I was wearing tampons well before I did the do, and I assure you if there'd been any sort of tearing I'd of freaked the hell out and never worn them again.

There's zero biological purpose to a "barrier". The bleeding virgin thing is because the hymen is a little crescent shaped bit of flesh at the bottom of your opening, so if it's exceedingly pronounced (about 25% of women iirc) or you're dry, then yeah it's going to rip and bleed. But nothing should be smiling wide or whatever the hell you've got going on the last two sentences.

If you're not talking about the mythical barrier that doesn't exist, then you might want to edit that last bit because it's incredibly disturbing no matter what you were going for.

Sadly I have to agree with the previous comment about the young woman's vagina. However, I personally loved the imagery that was used. I had once written something similar to this and trust me, it actually had gotten me worked up writing it. I've been thinking about writing some erotic literature myself, just to see if anyone else would like it but I'm not sure that I have a talent as wonderful as this one. Congrats. 5 Stars are given to you from me my friend. <3

There were several wrong choices/uses of words and descriptive terms for certain actions that ended up painting your story in a strange light. The development was also quite unconvincing and rushed. It lacked the pacing for proper suspense and that crucial element of fear one would expect from stories in this genre.

The last bit was just bizarre. It jumped from the puncture wounds to suddenly discovering her loss of virginity "smiling back at her"....???? Does that mean she's looking at her crotch directly instead of just feeling around her womanhood? A woman would need a mirror to get a good look at her hole like that. Not to mention, the smiling part is just creepy. You made it sound like she saw her pussy giving her a toothy grin or something. I also don't think I've ever seen anyone smile 'wide open'.

This story was meant as a kind of playful story you might dream sometimes. There are no vampires as far as I know of. Virgins are sometimes very tight. Hymens come in all types and forms and vagina's do not laugh. But in a dream you can sometimes have most shocking outcomes.

An excellent vampire story and a very enjoyable read.. I noted a couple of comments that brought errors in describing vaginal anatomy, I know ther are web sites that decribes human anatomy, use them to get the correct descirtion of the body part. I really hope you plan on a part 2 &3, like describing her preganancy and the birth of their son, his growing up and fitting in as a hybrid of a human and vampire, and when he reaches age 21 her giving him what his father had given her. Most interesting would be his relationship with his mother as he grows older. The story has a good plot and has excellent character development. I could give you not more than 1-STAR, ops, I meant 5-STARS. I hope you keep writing vampire stories as you are good at it and maybe try ba werewolf story also. Retired Army NCO