All Comments on 'The Last Time'

The audience is the third person viewpoint, not an active participant. So take out "you" and put in "she".

crap, the two good things about the story were it was short and this is hoping you never write another.

Stories written in this person are extremely frustrating to read. Just tell us the fucking story. I'm not really there with them so it makes no sense to read it that way!

Go together like dogs and shit, this story is both.-1

Please let it be THE LAST TIME Malacoda uses this format to tell a story.

The ENTIRE time, I am trying to understand WHY this is absolutely the last time. Is Sweetie dying? Yuck, anti-erotic! Is the couple moving to Fiji? Forever? Not THAT absolute! Have they been 'born-again?' Then LAST time shoulda been the last time! Is the Bull dying? Not likely to be that interested in some 'near-pussy!'

Sorry, even IF that unnecessary teaser HAD BEEN addressed, it would still be pretty poor! Plus, the restrictions are stupid in the LIT venue!

2.6 = a scant 3*

what is this trash got to do with LW? chuck would be better or sluts tale maybe.

Does that mean that after this it will be an other woman instead?

She is finally going to let him have fun also?

Ah hell no!

It is the last time he gets to have any pussy at all, after this it is full on cuckold

There wasn't any thing really explicit ar descriptive about the raw sex that was going on that caught my eye. It was mostly about them being nervous and that she wasn't going to fuck him again.

That in itself was a bit of a downer, knowing she wasn't' going to fuck him anymore, or perhaps she wasn't going to fuck him in front of her husband anymore, but fuck him a lot behind her husband's back.

How to not be a good tale.

HA

But if you actually did this you are now divorced.

Cuck and whore saying so long to a little bull.