All Comments on 'The Lesbian Maker Ch. 01: The Assignment'

One word “editing “.

Is English your second or third language?

There's absolutely nothing like a good lesbian seduction story. And this was nothing like a good lesbain seduction story. Seriously, you need lots of practice.

TimTam

Fairly good story. It would have been GREAT if written by someone whose first language was English!

Appalling use of the English language. Leave writing to people who know how to put words together.

Please keep going. Make Claudia fall deeper down the Rabbit hole. Make her as gay as Taylor Swift

Make Claudia hesitate but start to notice her attraction to women. Then make her the one that finds the closested ones. Then one of them she should fall in love with

Keep going

Great job. Yes there are errors. Keep practicing. I love this story's premise

I think it was completely unnecessary to include the ex-boyfriend. It would have been enough to pick up her by two pushing lesbian chicks.

Anyway, the story good. I like it.

I read it through but won't read anymore. By law this would be rape, not seduction or persuasion.

Could have been true.

I think a ten year old wrote it.

I suggest you use an editor. There are some really good ones on the site. The errors distract, particularly when in the very first line I thought the story was about witchcraft as you wrote, 'Tom was still angry at his hex girlfriend.' Some good content though have to agree with anon that it was bordering on rape rather than seduction which left me uncomfortable. as Saratoga11 wrote, 'keep practicing'.

This was rape. She was DRUGGED, she did not give consent. Whoever enjoyed and especially whoever wrote this really needs to check themselves. Rape is not hot. It's abuse.

Getting filmed without consent is rape.

Getting drugged before sex makes it rape.

Reread this and I've got to say, this IS a rape. Plus it's some of the most criminal writing grammatically I've read in a long time. What age is the writer?

I'm guessing English is not your first language? As another has commented, you need an editor, as this comes across as clumsily written.

cool story, i think it could have gone slower with the seduction, but it was still hot

Interesting premise. Ex boyfriend gets revenge by turning ex-gf lez.

Good story-telling. I hope you find a good editor.

I had hoped for a story of lesbian seduction to happen.

Seduce: to attract powerfully. entice, attract, tempt, cajole, lure;

The closest Claudia gets to being “turned” or “seduced” toward lesbianism is her counting how many lesbian orgasms she had. Because Claudia was drugged, abducted, and sexually abused into non-consensual orgasms the story belongs in the Non-Consent/Reluctance category, and not in Lesbian Sex category. If Claudia had woken up the next morning and started feeling attracted to Mary and had started nursing on Mary or waking Mary with gentle pussy-eating, Then the categorization could go either way.

It was like a drug induced rape. Knowing how normal it felt for our sub male to introduce another woman in our sex life while my female partner was pregnant, so we would grow as a family. We have no need for drugs in any of our relationships.

Thank you! That was fun, hot, sexy, well written & orgasmic...

I couldn't finish your story, sorry. You need an editor to help this story flow. It isn't easy to write a story and some things get lost as you type or write because you are thinking ahead.