All Comments on 'The Long Trip'

My suggestions: turn your protagonist's pain to pleasure. Perhaps he finds he's starting to enjoy this. All you've said above is that he seems to hate it all. If you were looking to get a good score in a category called "Gay Male" in erotica, you'll want your protagonist to get pleasure, even with some pain. Perhaps the protagonist starts to look forward to a long voyage with many big cocks to service, because, to his surprise, he's liking it.

It must have been a bit of a shock for our young sailor to find that his prostitute was a male, even if he did have a very small dick.

Then, when some of his fellow sailors decided to rape him in the shower, that must have been a real shock.

It was not a voluntary gay experience, but something forced on him, and can only be described as rape.

Thanks for the feedback. I want to constantly improve my work and any advice is helpful. Read my Part two and tell me your thoughts