All Comments on 'The Low Road'

Still working my way through all your work, but after the 2nd one in a row made me tear up I had to comment. Definitely one of the best authors I've ever read here. It's a rare author that can maintain their own style across genres. All the best to you and the Missus.

2 Comments:

1) Almost all of us all have known a Peter Schnell. Most of us have at one time or another secretly feared that we could be a Peter Schnell. Someone trying their best, with good heart, but barely hanging on or getting by. And then.. life shits on them big time. Again.

So when life finally gives them a break, it's something to celebrate. Simple, but powerfully relatable character and situation.

2) A Rod Serling approved ending. I didn't see the last line coming. And when I read it, I paused for second and *thunk* - it all fell into place. A nice piece of writing in a story this short. I would have added one more line expanding on the time and effort Schnell put in to save and comfort Campbell, but that's the only minor quibble I can think of, and usually I have a long list of them by the end of a story.

5 Stars.

At Ease Soldiers. Smoke 'em if ya got 'em. Rest.

The key to this story is the belief that one selfless act can make up for and redeem a world of shit! And we all do want to believe that.

Again. A great tale.

GREAT...... MARVELOUS

a heart touching tale about unending hopes in life.... May be ..... possibilities in nothing

A great short tale. Always good to hear positive spin for a pretty good guy who never got a break traveling the low road. Seems like Sgt Schell one fine break.

All Too Real

There too many troops who identify with Sergeant Schnell when their actions are acknowledged with a ribbon or award. They were just doing what they were trained for and the ones who deserve the hero's award aren't able to attend the presentation. And don't ask them to expain why they got the awards; it brings back the pain.

Fantastic story! I'm about as emotional as a rock but knowing this story had a factual base did move me. Hoorah, brother!

This an amazing, classic short story.

What's comes around turn's around. Good deeds will definitely be rewarded. God's work in a mysterious ways. Worth a 5 star ⭐🌟⭐🌟⭐🌟⭐🌟⭐🌟 rating

thank you so much

Best ever, Master Sargeant, best ever hoorah

I just love your writing, Todd. This is the fifth time I've read this story and I've loved it every time.

Doc Spirit 3

Great story.

Great story. Like all of your tales. I had thought I had read all of your stories but it was the first time for this one. Of all of the literotica authors you are in the top five in my humble opinion.

,,,you made my eyes all leaky,,,, thanks

Damn allergies…

Nicely written. I liked that the Tony Campbell death gave no hint that it would be significant later. Never apologize for a story being too short. Brevity is a virtue, not a flaw. Five stars, of course.

I've read this a few times and it always chokes me up. In this case payback is the sweetest.

Wow. Just. Wow.

After 22 years of service in the Air Force I can't think of one military member who ever felt that they deserved an award or citation they received for "just doing their duty." My brother, a retired Marine Gunnery Sergeant, only wears he ribbons when required for official functions and refuses to discuss how they were earned. He told me once that other deserved them more than he. Semper Fi, bro.

Great story.

You do an amazing job with your stories. Thank you for the hard work. You rival some of the best I have ever read in hard cover and paper back.

Just your normal excellent story. Digs at even a male’s ‘feel good’..

Outstanding!!!!!!!

I think in WW II, there was a cartoon character named Sad Sack. I think he must have been one of the Sergeant's ancestors. Beautiful story. As a veteran, I knew all those folks at one time or another.

Heart warming

Damn. I was a career firefighter and had a friend who found out he had cancer six months after he retired. He was divorced from his wife two years prior retirement so he married his girl friend so she could get part of his pension and insurance. He made it five years before the cancer took him when the doctors only gave him a year. I miss him still

Excellent, I liked it a lot, it is now one of my few favourites that I have⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Amen brother! We should all remember that it’s the heart and intentions that shine on. Poignant.

What a beautiful story. Thank you for such an amazing story

Wonderful * * * * *

Brilliant. That MSgt was nobody's fool, now was he? The choice of the narrator and his reactions as the story unfolded was well done, too. And of course, what everyone else said.

Great story 5 stars

Excellent!

A beautiful story well written

tear jerker

Amazing story. Had me in tears. The ending was a Paul Harvey moment - you know “the rest of the story”. Great story telling. Thanks for creating and sharing. John

Different. Excellent.

That closing! I can just hear Rod Serling's voice.

Brilliant. 😃

Unique and outstanding!

The lack of the funeral detail at SGT Schnell's funeral was the only distraction of note. Every military installation has a funeral detail, usually from the duty battalion of the quarter... The National Guard, American Legion or Veterans of Foreign Wars will send out a funeral detail for a service member if needed... You knew that; your missive "Duty" posted 05/21/17 makes that plain as day, so I'm not sure what the line:

"He looked me over. "Your uniform looks good. I'll need help folding the Flag." " was intended to add to the story line... But, I get it, SGT Schnell was a loser, and the missing funeral detail adds a bit more flavor to the tale

You deserve the encouragement and support that we give b/c, you give it back to us. Thanks

DLT

a True 5!

I love this story. Beyond words. It is short, but it makes its point swiftly and decisively and gut-wrenchingly. It is more than the sum of its parts, and I can't commend the author enough for how well done it is. It's inspired me to write a story in a similar theme, though longer and perhaps much more complex. I don't know that I'll be able to meet the standard The Low Road sets, but damned well going to try.

Escorts Or Not

Amber and her friends had class. Once Schnell showed what he really was in those few critical moments that no one including himself saw, he was no longer in any way a loser. *****'s Signed: BTW

Love this one.

Excellent !!! Ending with Amber was a welcome surprise

Great story as it regards a WINNER of a man. LP

WHY EVEN BOTHER WRITING A STORY ABOUT THE LOSER SCHNELL, HIS BITCH MOTHER AND FAMILY AND SKANK WIFE

Wow

Semper Fi to Sgt Schnell. Could be me, decades later, cept I don't know any women that would do for me. Ahhhhhh be a hell of a way, though. B c

Short, but one of my favorite stories.

I was thinking the old soldier went out in my idea of heaven and was ready to move until you threw the name Campbell at me. I went back through the story and - there it was! Tony Campbell died in his arms and he died in Tony's twin sister Amber's arms. That added a star or two to this story!

a short well written story, the Campbell twist to the story elevates it to the memorable, much loved category. To Anonymous, you know who, no-one else does! The Author obviously writes for his own pleasure, and by sharing, hopes that the reader will enjoy. The Question you should be asking is why even bother reading something if your response is so negative and immature

Very good story.

5 Stars. Great stuff

Chills....the good kind

Sometimes it is hard to separate one's emotional reaction to a story from an objective anaylsis of the quality of the writing. In this case it wasn't....

Two years ago last month I held my sister-in-law and 13-year-old niece close as Taps rang out over my late brother-in-law's funeral service. Full honors. 20 years Army, 30 with the V.A. fitting (and oftentimes physically modifying) prostheses to fit fellow servicemen who'd given up some part of their bodies for their country.

Enlisted at age 17 (lied, though he was legally 18 when he reported for duty in Vietnam) to escape a dismal future in a rundown area of Queens; exposed to Agent Orange--awhich I am certain contributed to the stomach and brain cancer which killed him, diagnosed only 7 months before his death; re-up'd over and over mostly because he had no where else to go--until he did.

My sister-in-law (a trained lab tech) is as blonde as blonde can be, my brother-in-law was mixed-race African American; that is relevant only in my saying my niece is one of the most beautiful young women (she turns 16 this month) I will ever see in this lifetime; a prodigy in ballet and modern dance. The last four months of my brother-in-law's life his greatest joy was in watching his daughter practice at home in their living room for her studio's late spring recital. I wheeled him into the auditorium and sat behind him throughout the program, with tears streaming down both our faces as he watched her performance. She did not miss a step. That night after the recital was over we went home, and she spent the hours until he went to sleep quietly curled up in his lap, one arm around his neck, the other lying across his chest.

I have sometimes felt my niece--with her head and hand pressed up against her father's chest listening to his heart beat--may have been unconsciously trying to recapture that time in her mother's womb when her mother's heartbeat was always there, secure, constant and unending.

Five weeks later he was dead.

There is no need to separate emotional reaction to objective analysis while reading this story.

10 out of 10 on both counts. Kudos.

Thank you for this.

My dad, a veteran of Patton’s army, had a book of cartoons called Sad Sack.

Short, and with stuff coming from all directions. Very interesting.

I enjoyed it.

My wife is headed out of state. Please send the ladies to babysit.

Thanks for bringing Tears to a Sergeants eyes . True I was a Gunny but I loved My work . Then My back gets hurt and that's all she wrote . Here is your 5 Stars . PS my favorite weapon was a SAW .

Bloody brilliant and moving

WOW, what a terrific twist at the end.

What can I say..such a sad story ! Loved it. 5*+

Maybe you can re-write it and make it a little longer...? Thank you.

Hell of a good story.

I've read stories on this website that are 3-5 chapters, each one 5-12 pages long, that aren't HALF as well written, or a third as moving as this page and a half.

This story, The Harpy and The Fury is an amazing set of stories, call it The Redhead Trilogy... No way I'm diving into that quagmire you call The Shack, but you're a Hell of a writer and you deserve to hear it again.

This is probably the BEST story I have ever read here in almost 15 years. 5 stars I wish it could be more.

Epic. Addicted to Stories from the Shack,

Especially Needles and Delaney, as well as St. Claire.

Great story, left me in tears. One of the best I ever read.

Bloody hell, what a twist. Just brilliant writing.

Did 14 yrs in the Marines. All the stuff written about in this story (except the 4 Damsels) is routinely part of a careerist's experiences during their service, at some point. We all have known someone like Sgt Schnell, whose luck just won't give them a break, but they keep on marching until they cannot.

I don't know who or what you are, if you ever stopped hiding behind the Anonymous shield in your life and actually have stood up to be counted for anything. What I can tell about you from your slimy comment is that Sgt Schnell, even as a fictional person, has 10 times the character and intestinal fortitude you do. Sgt Schnell would also be deserving of the ladies' love whereas you, not so much. SFMF

TODD172, and the Missus, I wish you a Merry Christmas and a great New Year. This is probably the 6th read thru of this tale and it still brings tears to my eyes, both sad and happy. I would like to thank you and the Missus for all the great writing and the superb way these yarns dig into heart and mind to make me feel again. I apologize for jumping on another reader of your story, but I cannot stand someone sniping from the shadows at any of my brothers & sisters at arms. Even the fictional ones.

R/S and Semper Fidelis

Amazing story from a talented author.

My 4th time reading this and gets better each time. One of the best stories on this site!

Army Strong!

What a wonderfully written story, to good for this site.

One thing Todd knows: how to end a story in a few brilliant words.

The fact that the tale is by Todd is all that needs be said. Mere point stars and words are never enough for this writer.

How anyone could offer a negative comment on this story (or any of Todd's, come to think of it) baffles me. Such criticism says everything about the commenter, none of it good. I spent 4 years in the service, saw a few Sgt Schnell types, but can't help but honor anyone who wore a uniform for our country. lpw

I knew several Schnells in the service. Our group sent young Airmen all over the world TDY. Some of those assignments were up to a year. I knew which guys would be targets of women who wanted to come to the US and would "fall in love" with these guys who had no experience with women. Many ignored my advice to not get involved but when some pretty girl tells them they are in love and gives them the affection they never had before, well wedding bells would ring. Two years and one child later, those wives would be cruising the enlisted clubs for the guys they really wanted. Then divorce, alimony and decades of child support while they move some other dude into the house. The now wiser young Airman (maybe Sgt by then) would be in bachelor NCO housing alone and broke.

OMG. That's all I've got. Other than 5 stars for this story. Thanks...

Thanks

Damn, I wish I could give bonus stars for this one! Very good story, Todd! That last sentence was a complete surprise to me.

I enjoy your works. I've personally been going through it. You can lie & deny PTSD all you want, but it's always there. I like your stories because, regardless of how heavily damaged your people are, they come out on the other side of it. They make something better than what they had. Vicarious is not a way to live, but it's what I have right now. Thank you.

I also knew guys like him in the Service, awesome, bought a tear to this old Airmans eye. 5 *****

This story touched me deeply.

I must be dense! I don't understand the ending!

"Schnell never really looked into things or connected the dots. He was too distracted to really pay attention to anything beyond the fact that she really seemed to be the only one who cared at first. Then they kept him distracted. I guess I can understand that. Diaz admitted that Amber paid him to make sure Schnell ended up in her club in Atlanta that first time. I never said anything and I'm pretty sure Schnell never caught on. She didn't want him to know."

"Know what?"

He pointed to the shelf behind her in the picture, where another framed photograph of another Soldier sat.

"She used to have a twin brother. Her last name was Campbell."

I must be dense! I don't understand the ending!

"Schnell never really looked into things or connected the dots. He was too distracted to really pay attention to anything beyond the fact that she really seemed to be the only one who cared at first. Then they kept him distracted. I guess I can understand that. Diaz admitted that Amber paid him to make sure Schnell ended up in her club in Atlanta that first time. I never said anything and I'm pretty sure Schnell never caught on. She didn't want him to know."

"Know what?"

He pointed to the shelf behind her in the picture, where another framed photograph of another Soldier sat.

"She used to have a twin brother. Her last name was Campbell."

@Anon 25042023:

At the beginning of the story...

"The only thing he'd ever done that was notable was to climb into a burning Humvee to pull another Soldier out after an IED strike. The badly burned Soldier, PFC Tony Campbell, died in his arms a couple minutes later, before the MEDEVAC helicopter even got close."

He was there for her brother, so she chose to be there for him.

Such a moving touching story. A truly uplifting feel good story from a great story teller.

5 Stars on a Great story . I am so glad for Amber making him happy . Between Amber and her 3 friends he died a lot happier then some guys have .

As far as missing things , I miss si much stuff going over my head the highway department named a four layer overpass after me.

Damn it, you made my eyes leak! **5**

Best ever Todd. Thank you.

When I got to the last part and it was revealed that Ambers last name was Campbell, I thought WTF? Then it hit me like a sack of potatoes, it was the guy Schnell pulled from the burning vehicle. Sometimes it just takes a little longer for the light bulb to come on. Great story and the fact that it's based on a true story is fantastic. Another five stars.

I'm not crying, you are!

Excellent story. Yes, we all have to make that journey but we should leave some behind to remember us.

I enjoyed this story immensely!

Loved it. Thank you.

Fan-fucking-tastic!!! Thank you Todd172 and Missus Todd172 for this masterpiece...

Another reading and more tears. Too many losses over the years. There are many people out there like Schnell. They live their life and just do what's necessary and what society expects, they have no dreams they just take what comes along and do what's expected. They ask nothing of others and expect nothing from them. They just do the right thing, most of the time. What an excellent story. Please right more and extend the Lady Killer alon with tales of Jinxy.

life is a bitch and then you die . most people get caught up in that mental state and forget to live . life may be short,but if you can't enjoy the life you have what the hell's the point . to quote someone famous,[ i can't remember who], live,laugh and enjoy !!

Thoroughly enjoyed and appreciated.