The Music Festival

"It's gonna be hot today, want to just grab seats?"

He nodded and gestured for me to proceed him. I led the way, feeling his eyes boring into my back the whole way. We were early enough to snag great general admission seats. The outdoor stadium was chairs on the lower level and bleachers on the top. The sun would beat down on us until mid afternoon, but we could relax instead of fighting for our lives on the open field below.

"Why didn't your girlfriend come with us?"

Luke looked at me like I'd grown a second head. "What girlfriend?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. On the way down, Mom said you were seeing someone."

"I always tell mom I'm seeing someone."

"Why?"

He lowered his voice so the people around us wouldn't overhear. "I can't exactly tell her I'm hung up on you, now can I?"

The air abandoned my lungs. "What? You haven't been with..."

"Of course I have, Jen. I'm not a fucking monk. But they're just hookups. No dating. Tried that. Didn't work."

It should have been a tense conversation, but again, he was so casual about it. It was different.

"I'm sorry I was nasty to you last night."

"Yeah, well."

"Yeah, well what?"

"You're still scared. Defensive. In denial."

"About what?"

"About everything. That you want me. That you don't want Kevin. That taking what you do want would be hard. Every day."

"So what, you're just waiting for me to change my mind?"

I infused my accusation with ridiculousness, because I thought that it was. But the way he looked at me fiercly and said simply, "Yes," sobered my mind real quick.

"Luke." I shook my head.

He didn't say anything else, just grabbed my hand and held it against his thigh.

Three bands later he put his phone down saying, "Mom and Dad are coming to take our seats."

"What are we doing?"

"I don't know, but I need to move around, piss, and get something to drink."

"You could've gone and done those things anytime."

He looked at me like he had before. "Not leaving you by yourself, Jen."

After we checked off all of Luke's objectives, we found ourselves wandering over to a side stage. There was still several hundred people standing and watching the band playing. They were good. Unfamiliar to me, but good. And theatrical.

The woman singing on stage was hot, with long blonde hair, barely dressed, but she screamed some of the lyrics with rage and grit. When I really started to listen to her words about blood in her veins, hating someone for the way they smiled at her, for choosing her, and loving them for dominating her and never giving her her way my skin started to prickle. Thousands of needles of awareness assaulted my body from my scalp to my soles until I couldn't stop myself from looking up at Luke where he stood next to me.

My action caught his attention and he looked at me as well. I don't know what he saw, but his body tensed, the sudden pause in his easy movements shifted the air around us. I thought he'd been fierce before, but that was nothing. I hadn't felt intensity on that level since the last time he'd moved inside me, telling me he loved me and holding my gaze while I came, and he followed me.

"Luke."

He couldn't have heard me because I didn't even hear myself over the music and the singer's pained screams. Still his head swooped down and his mouth crashed into mine. For the first time in nearly two years, I tasted him. He controlled the kiss, but it was more of an offering to me, to drink him in. We weren't touching anywhere but our lips, our tongues mimicking everything we used to do with our bodies.

I reached for him and lost his mouth instead. He pulled back, breathing heavy and wiped a hand down his face. Shit. I lost him and as such, I had time to consider the ramifications of just that one kiss.

My body leaned away from his, telegraphing my intention to get away, fast. But his hand captured my wrist and he tugged me back to his side.

"Do not fucking run from me," he growled.

We stared straight ahead, watching the end of the set and when the crowd around us thinned considerably we stayed. His strong fingers hadn't let go of me and we were both still breathing too heavily.

Everything around us quieted and he whispered, "If you touched me, I would have fucked you right here."

I twisted my arm gently, urging him to release my wrist. He did so with a pained expression, but I didn't do what he expected. I didn't run. I didn't snap at him. I took his hand and threaded our fingers together. He instantly relaxed.

With a sigh, he said, "I'm guessing you want to be on the field tonight for the last two bands?"

A smile took over my face. He always anticipated what I might want. "Yes."

He nodded. "Let's relax then. Save our energy." With that, he pulled me toward a beer tent.

It was shaded and cool inside. Comedians performed between main stage bands when the most people would filter in, but as soon as chords and beats began again, activity in the tent faded to nearly nothing.

Luke had taken a chair at my side instead of across from me. Once he started talking, I guessed it was so I was more likely to answer since we weren't face to face.

"Why'd you move out, Jen?"

I'd told him at the time it was because I couldn't do 'this' anymore, which was true. His underlying question then was, why couldn't I do it anymore. Be with him.

"I didn't want to fight anymore. You were angry with me all the time."

"I was angry because you weren't letting yourself take the next step with me."

"There are no 'next steps' in our relationship, Luke."

"Yes, there are. You just won't consider them."

"Enlighten me, then."

"It's called commitment, Jen. I make one to you, you make one to me. Just like any other couple on the planet."

"We can't get married."

"No shit, baby. But is it really a piece of paper that you need? You have my name already, that's all anyone will know."

"It's not though. Everyone we know, knows you're my brother. So we lead some sort of double life? How long before mom and dad wonder why their 30 year old or 40 year old children still live together?"

"I would be willing to tell them."

"What? You're insane."

"No, I'm serious about this. About you. I would risk my relationship with them, for you. But I guarantee you, it won't come to that. They'd never turn their backs on us, Jennifer."

"And our friends?"

"Who? All three of them we have between us? I know you think the people you know now are the people you'll know forever, but that's just not the case."

"Luke."

'It will be hard for awhile, but it will get a lot easier over time."

"What about kids?"

"I don't see you rushing to have kids with Kevin."

I flinched. Both because Luke finally said his name and it sounded awful to my ears. And because I didn't see myself ever wanting children with Kevin. It was a terrifying notion that I worried about not having them if I were to be with Luke.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "If you want to be a mother, I'll make you one. Whether one of us adopts as a single parent but we raise them together or we do our research and figure out the best way for you to have your own. It's not impossible."

"You make it sound simple."

"If you loved me as much as I love you, it would be."

He stood up and I started to panic, but he looked down at me, still calm and in control. "Want another beer?" He asked.

We didn't talk about us or our feelings for each other the rest of the day. We ate, we drank, we wandered, usually hand in hand. We did put our masks back on and meet our parents for dinner in a different tent. Shortly before we finished up, my phone vibrated across the plastic table top.

When I saw Kevin's name, I immediately looked at Luke. He saw it too. The muscle in his jaw jumped again.

I connected the call saying, "Hang on one sec, I need to find somewhere quieter." Giving Luke an apologetic look, I excused myself from the table and slipped out of the tent.

The best I could do was walk around the side where it butted up against a cement wall of the stadium. There was a three foot path and I was alone.

"Hey. How are you?"

"I'm exhausted, but we're still not finished. I just wanted to call you real quick and let you know I'm not going to make it tomorrow. I expected to just leave a voicemail."

"Oh. Ok, I understand."

"Even if we do wrap it up tonight, I'm not going to have the energy for a day long concert."

"Sure, I get it."

"It's not really my kind of thing anyway."

"Kev, I said I understand."

"Right. What's it like?"

"It's fun. It's hot though. Crowded. But the music is great. Everyone here is on such a high. It's really exciting. Plus, I've been able to catch up with Luke. We haven't talked in awhile."

"If you ask me, that's a good thing."

"Why's that?"

"Your brother is... well, he doesn't really do much, does he?"

"What do you mean?"

"He's got this fancy engineering degree, but he hasn't accomplished anything else. Lives in a shitty apartment. Works as a bartender. Hangs out at three day music festivals."

"I'm not sure what..."

"Yeah, Kelly, I'll be right there. Sorry, I have to go. I'll see you tomorrow night at home."

"Ok, Kevin. I love..." He had disconnected.

I stood there with my phone still held to my face for several moments trying to understand what I was feeling. On one hand, that conversation was typical Kevin. On the other, I really didn't like it and I was trying to figure out if I'd ever liked our conversations or if I just accepted them at face value. What was Luke doing to me?

I turned around to head back to my family, determined to act normal in spite of all the uncertainty swirling around inside my head. He was there. Standing maybe five feet away, waiting for me to find him.

"I hate that look on your face."

I jerked my chin back, surprised at his tone, but not his honesty. His words were angry, but he sounded sad.

"You look like you just realized how lonely you are."

Goddamn him for knowing me better than I knew myself. And for giving me this look in the first place. I was blissfully ignorant two days ago.

"It hurts to look at you."

I walked towards him but stopped with still enough distance to turn and run if I had to. I was always ready to run.

"Then make it go away."

A flash of surprise lit his face before he grabbed me and pulled me to him. His mouth slammed down on mine and I could feel everything he felt as he poured it past my lips.

I took hold of him the same way I had when he kissed me in my bed, pulling his hair and forcing him harder against my lips. There was nowhere for him to go except deeper, turning the kiss from hot and arousing to scorching and desperate.

He lifted me and pressed my back to the cool cement. I groaned, finally having his body alligned with mine again. His cock was hard and pressed against me. I couldn't stop myself from rocking my pussy along the hard ridge.

"Fuck, Jen." He moaned, skimming his mouth down my neck and sucking on the skin at my collar.

His hips moved with mine, forcing my shorts to drag across my clit and making my core clench with a need to be filled by him again.

"Excuse me."

"We froze."

"You need to move along. Sorry."

Our heads turned. A man in a security shirt stood at the end of our hiding place. He did look sorry to interupt, especially for my brother's sake.

"Sure." Luke lowered me to my feet. "Sorry about that, man."

He took my hand and led me back the way I'd originally come, smoothing down his hair where I'd messed it up.

Our parents were still at the table watching for us. I tried to jerk my hand away, but Luke squeezed it tighter. I thought it was for him, but then I remembered the phone call.

"So, Kevin's not gonna be able to make it."

"Well, that's too bad," my mother said. She meant it. She liked Kevin. The look she wore said she felt sorry for me. She glanced down at our hands. "Are you ok, sweetie?"

"Yeah. A little disappointed, but I get it."

I met my father's eyes. They didn't hold any sympathy. They moved from me to Luke to our hands then back to Luke. My heart crawled up into my throat and I insistently shook my brother's hand off.

He slid his hands in his pockets and told them, "We're going to head out on the field now. Jen really likes tonight's line up."

My mom's expression was chipper. Her cheeks flushed from the sun. "Ok. You guys have fun!"

They stood up and started past us, but I noticed my father grab Luke's arm and say something to him too quietly for me to hear. Luke just nodded.

On our way, I asked him about it. "What did Dad say to you?"

He smiled and threw an arm around my shoulders. He said, "You keep her safe, Son."

We reached the edge of the crowd. Luke made to squeeze us through so we could be closer, but I pulled back. "This is fine."

He nodded and I smiled.

"What," he asked.

"Someone should tell Dad that being with you isn't safe."

I was joking but he didn't take it that way. He maneuvered our bodies so that I stood in front of him, my back pressed to his front. His arms came around me, caging me, and he rested his chin on my shoulder.

"Please don't get scared again, Jen. I swear to God I won't let anything happen that we can't get over or get passed."

I closed my eyes and relaxed into him, wanting him to know that I did trust him.

"Remember the first time we had sex?"

I nodded.

"It all made sense then didn't it? Didn't it feel exactly right?"

Again, I let my body answer for me. I nodded while I bent my arms to hang on to his where they curled around me.

After he snuck into my bed and made us both come, we tiptoed around each other for days. He didn't avoid me, nor I him, but we didn't address the huge safari animal in the room.

He came home from work one night, surprised that I was still awake. I'd always been asleep long before his bartending shifts ended. But that night, I just wasn't tired.

I told myself I'd initiate a conversation about us when he got home. Thinking about what we'd done was driving me crazy. Especially since it seemed to be a fluke occurrence. I needed to know.

But he laid his keys down and came deeper into the living space and all my plans flew out the window. There was nothing special about his actions, his appearance, but everything felt different. It was the first time we'd ever been alone, living together, just the two of us. It felt like he was coming home to me. Not because it was where he slept every night, but because it was where I slept every night. Like I could be anywhere and that is where I would find Luke.

"What are you watching?"

He was looking at the television. I had no idea what was playing, because I'd been lost in thought, but I couldn't answer him anyway. My mouth wouldn't work.

"Jen?" He said my name louder like I wasn't listening, but when he looked at me it was obvious he had all my attention. "You alright?"

I wasn't sure how to answer that so I stood up from the couch. From ten feet away, we just stared at each other unmoving. We probably looked foolish, but it didn't dawn on me to feel that way. I felt more comfortable with him than I ever had.

He never told me what was going on in his head, but given his most recent words to me, I had a pretty good idea.

Suddenly, we just moved. Both of us at the same time until we collided. He kissed me while he walked me backwards down the hall. He made a choice and pushed me into his room instead of my own.

We undressed ourselves quickly. I finished first having no shoes or socks on, no bra or panties. He didn't have enough patience with himself to finish just then. He picked me up and laid me down on his bed coming over me and sucking my nipple into his mouth.

My back arched and I moaned. One of his hands slid up my bare thigh and just like before, he sought my wetness. He dipped his fingers inside me and continued licking and sucking on my breasts.

"Open," he growled when the sensations had me pressing my thighs together. I did what he said and his thumb did laps around my clit.

"Luke!"

"Shhhh," he whispered before biting me lightly and scraping my nipple with his teeth.

He wasn't helping me be quiet. He was making me cry out every time his fingers thrust inside me. He sucked so hard on me, I knew he was leaving his marks all over the flesh of my tits.

I reached down and was able to brush my hand along his cock, proud and hard inside his boxers and bursting through his open jeans. I found the very end of him and rubbed him harder.

His head came up, his jaw slack and his hips pushed into my hand. "Take it out," he whispered.

My right hand dove into his underwear and wrapped around his length, while the other pushed his clothing out of the way. I freed him and stroked my hand from root to tip.

"Jen," he groaned, fucking my fist while I worked my hips fucking his fingers.

He kissed me softly again and again, barely grazing my lips with his tongue. His pre-cum kept leaking into my hand and my pussy became so wet his fingers could be heard plunging in and out.

"I'm close, Luke."

"Come, baby. I'm gonna slam inside the second you do."

"Oh fuck."

"That's it. I can't wait to feel you on my cock."

"Luke!"

I felt the first wave of orgasm crash into me only to slip away when Luke robbed me of his fingers.

"No!"

And then I was full, stretched tightly around his cock. My brother's cock. I screamed when it hit me again, harder, threatening to drown me.

"Fuck! Jen, baby."

He fucked me hard and fast while my whole body pulsed with the strongest orgasm I'd ever had. It wasn't sweet, but it felt like the strongest love I'd ever felt as well. I wanted to meet his thrusts, but I could barely move save the involuntary jerks of my body whenever he brushed my too sensitive clit. I wanted to make it good though so I squeezed him as hard as I could with the walls of my pussy.

"Jesus, Jen," he growled giving me his weight and hiding his face in my hair. "You're gonna make me come."

I moaned, feeling as much pleasure from knowing I could affect him as I did from his big cock filling me over and over. I wrapped my arms and legs around him and pulled him in, crushing him with everything I had left. The drag it created inside me every time he moved felt deliciously sexy.

Consequences were the furthest thing from my mind even when he tensed in my arms and cried out near my ear. His frenzied thrusts stopped and instead he fucked with me with deep, powerful, punctuated slams of his hips as he spilled his cum inside me.

I had almost forgotten he was supposed to be off-limits.

"What are you thinking about?"

I opened my eyes again and found myself still in his arms, but we'd been swallowed by the crowd. People moved and danced and laughed and sang all around us, seemingly materializing out of thin air. I realized I was moving too, squirming, almost grinding my body against Luke's. His cock was hard where it was pinned under my ass.

I leaned slightly so I could turn my head and meet his eyes. He was smirking, but the fire he had every time he looked at me was still burning hot. I raised my arm until I could grab the back of his head and pull his mouth down to mine.

He let me lead. I coaxed his mouth into moving with me, our tongues dancing while hidden by our lips. Still our eyes were open and speaking without sound.

One of his hands slid up and cupped my breast. I arched, filling his palm with my roundness and pushing my ass into his hips. He had to pull his mouth away to breathe harshly in and out. He hugged me so tightly I felt the tremble in his arms.

"You're mine," he whispered. "No more running."

I nodded and he kissed me again until we had to stop or we'd be putting on a show of our own.

Later, when the last band of the night was on stage, my favorite in the whole lineup, Luke still stood behind me. His hands were at my hips as they occasionally moved with the music. It wasn't music you typically danced to, but I found a way.