The Music Festival

Luke and I had shared several more touches and kisses like we were a normal couple having a night out in our favorite way. Probabily like a lot of people in the crowd, there with the person they loved, whether it was permanent or for one night.

The current song ended and the lights fell, bathing the crowd in darkness. No moon or stars could be seen even though I knew they were there.

A single spotlight shone down on the lead singer, just as the easily recognizable chord of their next song rang out from massive speakers next to the stage. Everyone cheered. My heart stuttered in my chest.

It was a brutal love song, my favorite even though I couldn't stand to hear it anymore. It was slow and quiet, something I never thought they'd play at a huge festival with the immeasurable energy of 50,000 people.

Luke knew what it was and he knew the significance of it. It defined the ugliest time in our relationship. A song about begging someone not to love you because they can't love you enough. Taunting them to run away. To stay away because your love unreturned would turn it into violence. You hate them because you love them too much.

I'd called Luke over and over after I moved out. When he never answered, I resorted to texting, every day, to let him know I loved him, worried about him, missed him. My brother.

After weeks, I got one reply. A line from the song that I couldn't escape just then. I couldn't turn it off or plug my ears. I could run, but it would chase me, probably still easily heard back at our tents. I had no choice but to let the music assault me like his pain had two years before.

"You refused to fight," he'd said out of the blue while I'd been eating dinner with Kevin. "I'm done, Jennifer. Stop fucking texting me." I'd had to excuse myself to cry in private.

He pulled on my hips until my body rested along his once again. He hugged me tightly and pressed his mouth to my neck.

"I take it back," he whispered. "I'll take any part of you you're willing to give me."

Tears spilled over and ran down my face.

"Shhhh. Please don't cry, Jenny."

His use of my childhood nickname made me cry harder, but I knew I wasn't alone. The song resonated with a lot of people for a lot of different reasons. I was sure there were others in the crowd giving into their emotions. Still, I stared at the back of the person in front of me.

Luke's hand slid across my belly and snuck under the hem of my tank top. The rough pads of his fingers stroked my bare skin. I shivered.

"I fucking love you so much."

I sucked in a breath and he took advantage of my dipped stomach, inching his hand down the front of my shorts until his fingers met the elastic of my panties and he moved beyond that barrier as well.

He pushed me forward gently, closer to the stranger in front of us. Using the man to partially shield his actions. I leaned back into Luke, afraid I'd accidentally bump the stranger.

I took in skaky breaths as my brother's fingers dove farther, over the hair I still kept trimmed just the way he'd once shaved it to his liking, and into the heat between my legs. He separated my folds, being neither careful, nor rough, just confident. I willed my body to absorb just a little of his bravery. I felt disarmed and torn wide open. I hadn't felt this vulnerable in two years.

"It's going to be ok, baby," Luke whispered in my ear, reading me regardless of how hard I tried to hide from him.

He found my clit and circled it slowly, waking me up with tenderness. His other hand moved up the front of my shirt. My nipples were hard peaks by the time he made it to one of them. He pinched it through the lace of my bra.

I needed to do something or the desire I felt was going to make me explode. I slid one of my hands behind my back, arching to make room, and palming his hard cock.

"Just let me make you come, Jen."

I shook my head, brushing our temples together as I squeezed his package.

"So stubborn," he moaned. He barrelled through the green light I'd given him and plunged a finger inside my pussy. "I missed this warm little pussy." He moved in and out several times and then a second finger joined the first. "You don't know how much I want to slide my cock inside you."

I bit down on my lip and concentrated on unbuttoning his shorts. He not only let me, his breath betrayed his anticipation of having my hands on him again. When I slid behind his boxers and felt him hard, ready to fuck, and leaking arousal, everything else was forgotten, including my fear.

I manipulated his cock, trying to stroke him as best I could with limited movement. He had no issues finger fucking me like we were the only two people in the world. His hand at my tit squeezed hard, leaving his palm to graze my nipple.

"I wish I could suck on this right now."

His fingers bent and the sudden impact to my g spot had me sagging against him.

"I bet you still taste delicious."

I squeezed his cock and he let out a huff of laughter along the side of my face.

"Mmm she wants to ride my face again." He spoke to no one, maybe himself, but his words were like hot wax on cool skin, landing with a burn of intensity that made my sex clench. "I know the feeling. I miss your mouth on me too."

My groan was swallowed by the sounds of thousands of people, all singing the same lyrics. My hips undulated, dancing again, but not to the music, to the beat of the hand at my pussy, fucking me faster and harder than the slow agony of the song.

I kept the same time with my own hand, squeezing Luke and dragging my palm up and down his flesh, before circling the swollen head of his beautiful cock.

"So good, baby."

I had to agree. It was always so fucking good when he touched me. Nothing about it felt forbidden. It felt meant to be.

On that thought, I lost control of my body, my cunt fluttered around his fingers and my back arched. His thumb hit my clit and I came, shaking in his arms, my sex drumming out my orgasm against his fingers.

"Fuck yeah, come for me."

I felt wetness gushing out of my body, soaking my panties and dousing the flesh around my pussy toward the cheeks of my ass. Luke abandoned my breast to pull my hand away from his cock and wrap my arm around myself where he held it firm.

I whimpered, still coming from his refusal to still his hand at my pussy. He fucked me even as he rocked his own hips into my ass.

The wet head of his cock brushed against the skin at the small of my back and my sex weeped more in anticipation. He was going to mark me. Out in the open. In a crowd of thousands. My brother was going to claim me.

I was wanton again. The way I always was with him. The beast of desire awake after I thought it had been slayed. I wasn't prepared to fight it again. I didn't want to. I wanted to free it instead.

I tugged at Luke's arm, pulling his hand out of my shorts. When he tried to wrap that one around me as well, I intercepted. I forced his wet fingers to my mouth and sucked my cum off of them. It took him less than a second to respond.

"Fuck!" He pulled at my hips and ass harder, rubbing our bodies together.

I used my tongue to lick between his fingers and clean him. He wasn't still. He fucked them into my mouth like he'd been fucking them into my cunt. Groaning and breathing like he was the beast itself.

"Let me taste you. Now, baby."

I turned my head and his lips crashed against mine before he sucked my tongue into his mouth, searching for the taste he longed to devour.

I watched him. His eyes were closed but still I read the ecstasy he felt as his brow creased and hot cum hit my skin, painting my back. He grunted in my mouth, over and over, as two years of want poured out between between our bodies.

We both went still and quiet, even as the crowd raged around us, the music having long since returned to the raucous nature of the event. Luke's lips left mine and his hands slid down to button me up.

I tried to meet his eyes but they were still closed. "Luke?"

"I need a second." He panted hard, fighting to regain his composure. His arms dropped from around me but he held on to my hips either to make sure I was steady or to encourage me not to move just then.

"You're wearing me," he whispered causing a shiver of new desire to heat my blood. I could feel his hands moving between us, righting himself. My shirt stuck to my back, absorbing his cum, which cooled immediately once he stepped away.

I turned my body to face him and met his satisfied gaze. Leaning in he said, "Do you want to stay?"

Seeing my favorite band perform on one of the world's largest stages wasn't a once in a lifetime experience. Hopefully, neither was getting lost in Luke, but I found myself unwilling to risk it so I shook my head.

He grabbed my hand and led us through the crowd and out of the stadium.

We were quiet on the walk back to the tents. I don't know what went through his mind, but he occasionally squeezed my hand tighter until I squeezed him back. He led us directly to the building with the bathrooms and kissed me quickly before we separated.

I used the facilities and cleaned up as best I could. I removed my soaked panties and thought seriously about just throwing them away. There wasn't much I could do about my back, but I wasn't in a hurry to wash him off of me anyway.

When I walked back out into the night, he was waiting for me, but my feet stopped working. He stood under the halogen light, one hand in his pocket, and the other holding, what I assumed was his wadded up tshirt. He was naked from the waist up and while there was a lot I loved about his body, his bare chest and abs were works of art.

He'd looked serious until he realized I was struggling. A bark of laughter sounded out as He walked to me. "See something you like?" He teased.

I swallowed, my throat dry even while I felt my mouth watering for him. "I mean, you're ok, I guess."

"Funny." He grabbed my arms and turned me around. "I took it off to wet it a little bit," he explained, pulling my shirt away from my back and swiping his own back and forth over my skin. It was cold from the water or maybe my body was just especially hot. Either way, I jumped at first contact.

He wiped the remnants of cum away and made to take my hand again. He wasn't the only one who'd made a change to his wardrobe though and he found the panties I'd balled up in my fist.

He pulled them loose and held them up, unsure at first. "Seriously?" He groaned.

My shoulders lifted in a shrug. "They were too wet."

He stuffed them in his pocket and successfully took my hand on his second attempt. "Hope you don't expect to get those back."

"I do," I teased.

"Too fucking bad, baby."

We decided it was best to build a fire and wait for our parents to come back, even though every look we shared seemed to scream at our longing to zip ourselves in the tent and fuck until we couldn't move. The flames were licking high into the air when he settled in the camp chair beside me, handing me a barely chilled beer from the cooler.

"So this weekend isn't going according to plan," I joked taking a long pull from the brown bottle in my hand.

"Yes it is." Luke winked at me when my mouth opened in surprise. "I've been waiting a long time."

"Why did you?"

"I was so fucking pissed at you. For a long time." He took his own drink. I watched his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed. "At first I didn't care how I felt about you, I wasn't about to give you the satisfaction of begging you to stay. That's why I stayed away from the wedding. I would have fucking begged you not to go through with it if I had you alone for two seconds."

"Maybe you should have."

"Don't."

"What?"

"Don't look back at that time now and fool yourself into remembering your feelings differently. You wouldn't have heard me back then. I wasn't kidding when I said you're stubborn. You thought you were doing the right thing and nothing I could have said would've made a difference."

He was probably telling the truth. I was so afraid of what he felt for me that I dug a hole for my own feelings and didn't bother marking their grave.

"Eventually the anger faded and I figured my feelings toward you would do the same. I kept waiting for the morning I'd wake up and innocently think, 'I wonder how Jen's doing.' That would be the day I'd accept my professor's job offer, move to Denver, and simply look forward to seeing you on the holidays, like that year between us had never happened. "

I was pretty sure my heart stopped. "What?" It came out as a whisper I wasn't sure he could hear, but he did. He always heard me, even when I said things that hurt him. "What offer?"

"Jared Price stopped teaching at the college shortly after I graduated. He emailed me one day and offered me a position at the firm he started with his brother-in-law out in Denver."

My heart had stopped for a moment, sure, but then it started pounding wildly and forcing blood to rush through my veins fast enough for it to heat my body from head to toe.

Luke had graduated a couple months after we started sleeping together. I moved out ten months after Kim did. After he started talking about the future. Our future. Because he'd had an amazing opportunity to build one and not only did I convince him I didn't want it, I made him not want it too.

"Why haven't you taken it?"

"I haven't woken up feeling that way."

"You have to take it, Luke."

"Not leaving you by yourself, Jen. Remember?"

"I'm not.'

"You are."

"Is the offer still good?"

Luke sighed. "Yeah. He checks in with me regularly."

I set my beer down and covered my face with my hands. Kevin's hateful words about Luke coming back to me.

"Hey." He reached over and pulled my hands away from my face, but I couldn't look at him. "I'm a grown man, Jen. I've made my own decisions and I'm fine with them."

"You can't throw that opportunity away."

"I'm not. I'm going to take it the second you agree to come with me."

I shook my head, panic crawling up my throat. I was about to scream or run or kiss him, fuck I didn't know which.

"Hey you two!" Our parents appeared around the tent, Mom in her tipsy happiness, Dad holding onto her, keeping her steady. I realized then how much Luke was like our dad. Devoted, unwavering, in his adoration for Mom. She was a free spirit, spontaneous and constantly finding joy in life and at times it seemed like he existed to keep her world spinning rightly on its axis.

I wasn't like her though, carefree and kind. She never tried to control the world or second guess her place in it. If I had a man like Dad, if I had Luke, could I let go and live free too? Would he be there to pull me back from the edge or help me jump off it, ever my safety net?

Had I become this way because I walked away from my brother? The months we spent together were infinitely better than any time before or after. I was beginning to think it was less about who Luke was and more about who I was when I was with him.

'He doesn't let you be you.' He'd said about Kevin. The men in my life had an awful lot to say about each other. Who did I want to believe had it right?

I glanced at Luke and realized he was watching me closely even while Mom blabbered on about the show. She must've been tipsier than I thought because she ignored our silence and pulled Dad into their tent.

"Are you finally figuring it out?" Luke asked, keeping his sharp eyes on mine.

I nodded. "Yes," I whispered.

He said nothing else, just stood, grabbed my hand and pulled me out of my chair. I followed him to our own tent and went in first. He sealed us in and then took my hand again and pulled me down to the floor.

We sat facing each other, one of my hands in one of his, his other brushed the stray hairs out of my face.

"Talk to me," he said.

"I was happy with you."

He took a deep breath like he could inhale my words and fit them into the very cracks I had made in his heart when I left.

"Even fighting with you, I was happy. I didn't want that to change. It all felt so fragile and I got scared that I was betting all my happiness on something that shouldn't be happening in the first place."

"And how do you feel now?"

"Even more terrified." I don't think it was what he expected or hoped I'd say, but he took it in without losing his calm. "I don't know if I'll ever be that happy again unless I have you. I'd rather be happy than safe."

I didn't know I was crying until he started brushing the wetness off my face. My voice trembled as I told him, "It's wrong how much I love you."

His hands slid down my torso until he could hook his fingers under the hem of my shirt. He pulled up and I raised my arms without question. With it gone, and his still missing, I was hungry to press my body into his.

His arms went around my back where his fingers deftly unhooked my bra before sliding the straps down my arms and tossing it aside.

He leaned his body into mine, lowering my back to the floor. Still saying nothing, he opened my shorts and pulled them down my legs. He left me laying there naked and exposed as he got rid of his remaining clothes.

Starting at my feet, Luke skated his hands and his lips up my entire body. He paused once to nip at my hip before his tongue traveled up my torso, between my breasts and ended at the hollow of my throat.

He loomed above me, his body stretched out with mine, his hips resting btween my thighs. His skin felt like warm velvet to my torso, his light chest hair tickling my hard nipples.

"Let me show you how not wrong this is."

He kissed around my jaw line, one hand cupping my cheek, the other running it's fingertips up and down the outside of my thigh. He'd been slow and tender before but it was more typical for us to crash together and fuck like we'd never get the chance again.

Finally claiming my mouth, I opened for him, taking him in and moving with him. I considered giving up everything just to have a kiss like that once everyday, even if I never felt him slide his cock inside me again. It was deep. We consumed each other. And it lasted long enough for us to both pull away panting.

"Luke."

"Tell me, Jen."

"Please."

"Please what baby?"

His fingers dipped into my heat, testing me.

"I need you inside me."

I lost his contact only to feel it replaced by the blunt head of his cock. He nudged me open and pushed forward, sinking himself into my body.

I started to groan, but he covered and absorbed it with his mouth. My arms wrapped around his shoulders. His hands slid beneath me and grabbed my ass, tilting me up to accept as much of him as possible.

I rocked my hips against him, unable to stand his stillness. "Luke, move please, baby."

He did as I asked, pulling out and gliding back in. He felt like heated steel taking me, branding me from the inside. The whole time staring into my eyes.

"You fit me perfectly, Jen."

He found a rhythm, slow but steady, fucking me silently which was new. My body stretched around him even as I forced myself tighter. He moaned for me. Giving up my eyes, he dropped his head to the side. His teeth scraped my neck and his hips moved faster.

"You feel so good." I was so wet for him.

"I need to watch you taking me," he whispered. And then we were rolling until I was laying on top of him, his hips still making use of our connection.

"Sit up and ride me baby so I can see that pretty pussy."

I separated my torso from his and straddled his hips. His hands immediately went to my tits, but his eyes were watching his cock, seeing more and then less as I claimed him back, leaning with my hands braced on his legs, showing off my cunt.

His face was covered in awe, like he couldn't believe how good the very thing he'd advocated for could be. When I increased the speed of my movements, dropping my body down over and over, it was for my sake, but he liked it too. He threw his head back and arched. I had less distance to fall as his hips started thrusting up and meeting me on my way down.