The New Girl - A Man's Perspective Ch. 08

Chapter 8: Self Discovery

That night was worse than the usual lonely, dull evening I have every night. I couldn't stop thinking about her. Every channel I flipped to on the tv I saw something that reminded me of Amy. Christmas lights outside, the radio on the way home, even my boring nasty frozen pizza. I needed to clear my head.

I took the rest of the week off. I called and left a voicemail for my boss at work and told him I had some family issues come up and I needed the rest of the week off. I had enough PTO banked up to take nearly 6 months off, what's 4 days? The next day I was startled awake by my phone ringing. 'Fuck, it's my boss,' I said out loud. "Hello," I said. "Jeff? Is everything ok? I got your voicemail and got worried. You never take time off. So of course, when you said there were some family issues I became concerned," he said. "Yeah, yes, I'm fine. Everything is fine. There's just some things I need to take care of from my mother's death. I know it's been several months, but they were my responsibility and I completely spaced it, I need to take care of it before the end of the year," I said, rubbing my eyes and forehead trying to wake up a bit. "Ok, yeah, of course. Take however long you need. You're my best IT guy and I can't afford to lose you or your work become sloppy. Just keep me in the loop, please," he assured me. "Absolutely, John. I'll be back Monday, latest. It shouldn't take long, but I'll keep you informed," I said, wanting to get off the damn phone and go back to sleep, even though I knew I would just lay there staring at the ceiling thinking about Amy. "Sounds good. Thank you, Jeff. Talk to you later," John said, then he hung up the phone.

I tossed my phone onto the coffee table and looked at my cat, who was telling me it's my fault he missed breakfast. "Ok, ok, come on," I said, getting up and walking to the kitchen to get coffee and feed him.I stood there, in the kitchen, watching the coffee drip slowly out of the coffeemaker, zoning out. I need some music. Maybe that will take my mind off Amy. "Alexa, play Led Zeppelin on Spotify," I said. "Thank you" came on. "If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you. When mountains crumble to the sea, there will still be you and me. Kind woman, I give you my all, Kind woman, nothing more..." Robert Plant sang." Sorry Rob, I can't listen to you right now," I said out loud. "Alexa, play Opeth Ghost Reveries on Spotify," I said. "I hear the baying of the hoooounds, in the distance. I hear them devouriiiing, Pest ridden jackals of the earth, Diabolical beasts and roaming the forests," came out of Alexa. 'Fuck yeah. This is it. Now, let's get this day started differently,' I thought, nodding my head to the beat.

I decided at that point I was going to look at life differently. It had been 2 years since I found out my ex-fiancé had cheated on me with her ex-boyfriend. 'Why am I reliving that every day?' I thought to myself as I stepped in the shower. It was ridiculous. I put myself through hell by putting up impenetrable walls and not letting anyone in. "I'm going to take a trip. Maybe go up into the mountains and camp the rest of the week? I think that will do the trick. I need to clear my head somehow though," I said while looking at myself in the mirror. I watched myself smile, thinking about the endless possibilities. I don't remember the last time I smiled. It felt good. I packed a bag and went to my garage for my camping gear and loaded it up in my car. I was excited. A vacation, finally!

On my drive out of town, I turned the music up so loud the car next to me at the stoplight could hear it. I didn't care. I was finally getting over my past ruined relationship. Amy was still at the forefront of my mind, but at that moment she took a backseat to my plans. Suddenly my phone rang. I looked to see who it was and if I even wanted to talk to them. It was Greg.

"Greg! What's up?" I said.

"Jeff? You sound different. You sound happy. Did you get a different job, finally?" he asked.

"No, I'm actually taking the rest of the week off and heading out of town. I don't know where yet. I just need a break. I've worked non-stop the last 3 years and am burnt out. I need a recharge," I said.

"Oh, ok. Well, be careful. You're my only brother and I love you. Let me know where you're at whenever you figure it out. No, I won't keep tabs on you and I'll tell Mindy not to either," Greg said.

"I will. So, what's up? Did you need something?" I asked.

"Oh, uh, no. I was actually just calling to chat. Hey, I'm sorry I was drunk on Christmas. I rarely drink anymore, so that whiskey hit me hard. If I made an ass out of myself and embarrassed you, I want to apologize," he said.

"You were pretty intoxicated, but I don't think you were drunk. You weren't' slurring your words or stumbling so there's no need to apologize for anything. Besides, it was Christmas. Can I ask you a question?" I said.

"Anything. What's up?" Greg said, sounding a tad apprehensive of my question.

"What do you remember from that night before Amy & I left?" I asked.

"Oh boy. That's hard to say. The night became kind of blur after dinner. I remember sitting down to watch our movie and then bits and pieces until I woke up yesterday morning. Why, was there something specific you're asking about?" he said.

"No, I was just curious. I could tell in your complexion you had a little too much to drink," I said, laughing.

I was glad he didn't remember hardly anything, especially the encounter with Amy in his kitchen. I was terrified that's why he was calling. I hoped he didn't ask about seeing my car parked for more than an hour at Amy's the other night. I didn't know what I would say if he did.

"I'll let you get on with your vacation, bro. You definitely need it," he said.

We hung up the phone, and I stared out the windshield thinking about Amy. She is a piece of work. I couldn't put my finger on it, but she opens up a part of me that has been closed for a long time. I could never fully let myself go like when I'm with her. She made me feel like a real man. She depends on me at work and seemed to enjoy being around me outside of there, and I enjoyed being with her as well.

I drove for what seemed like most of the day. When I finally arrived at the campground, I found a pleasant spot on a ridge overlooking a waterfall. It was all silent and serene. I set up my tent and gathered firewood. I had a cooler full of food in my trunk next to my fishing pole. Dad, Greg & I always used to go fishing when we were kids and I still remembered how he taught us. I sat on a log next to my tent and just stared out over the ridge, still thinking about Amy. It would have been great if she were there with me, just the two of us. I think she would have loved it.

Later that night I caught 6 fish. They were delicious. I ate 2 and saved the remaining 4. The stars shined brighter than I had ever seen. Millions of them. I turned to my phone and saw I had a text message. It was from Dad again.

"Hey bud! Heard you were going on a much needed vacation. Just wanted to say I love you and be careful," the text read.

I flipped to my photos and scrolled through them. All the memories from Christmas, mom, Greg & I fishing with the boys. Then I saw several photos of Amy.

"When did I take these? Or who took them?" I said out loud.

Maybe I took them on Christmas while we were all drinking? I couldn't remember. I flipped through them and noticed there were several provocative photos of her in questionable poses, clothes on. Next thing I knew, all of her photos were nude. Not just nude, but X-rated!

"What the fuck? She must have gotten ahold of my phone because I know I didn't take these?" I said, confused but very aroused.

My cock stirred in my pants. I felt it grow against me and felt the cold against my skin as precum leaked out. I kept flipping through. Her shirt was open and tits out. She was pinching a nipple in the next one. Then her shirt was off and only thing was on. Black lace like she wore in the office. The next photo she had them pulled to the side. Her fingers dipped in and out and spread her pussylips in the next several pics. Then she had toys I've never seen. She slid the toys in and out of her slick pussy. My cock was throbbing. She was dripping cream and pussy as she flipped to her knees. My breathing became heavy and my heart raced. Finally, I came to a video.

"Oh, you've got to be shitting me. How? Man, this is too good to be true," I said.

I clicked play.

"Hi Jeff. I thought I might give you a petty show for when we aren't with each other. I hope you enjoy the show," she said in the first video, giving a wink and blowing a kiss.

She started by running her fingers across her lips, then down her collarbone. Then she glanced up at the camera with that seductive look that always gets me hard. She ran her fingers down her chest. The top 3 buttons of her shirt were open.

"Do you like my shirt, Jeff?" she asked while pulling one side of the shirt across her breast.

She opened the remaining buttons and pulled her shirt to the side, exposing her entire breast, the side of her belly and her hip. She was on her knees and they were closed so I couldn't see if she had taken her panties off yet. She pulled the other side of her shirt open and caressed and lifted her tits as she looked into the camera.

"Mmm, I wish it was your hands on my tits, babe. This feels so good," she said.

She slid the shirt off her shoulders and ran her hands down her chest to her knees. She looked into the camera and smiled. She didn't say a word, but I could read her like a book at that moment. She was gorgeous. She opened her knees, revealing different panties. These were plain white. No lace, no crotchless, and not a g-string. Part of me was disappointed, but I kept watching. She ran her hand up and down her pussy. She slid her hand inside her panties and rubbed her clit. Her other hand was still caressing her breast. She pushed a finger into the side of her panties and pulled them aside and slid it up her wet slit. My eyes were wide and my hand was gripping my cock through my pants. She pulled her legs out and sat on her butt. She pulled her panties off and spread her legs wide. Her beautiful flower opened. She slid her finger across her sticky hole and up to her clit. Rubbing her clit, I could see her pussy and ass twitch. Her moans were sweet music to my ears. Then she laid back and grabbed her clit sucker and started swirling it around her swollen clit. She gasped and slid a finger inside her now dripping pussy.

I didn't realize it at that point, but I had pulled my cock out and was stroking it with my tent door wide open. If anyone else was camping nearby, they would have heard the video and seen my silhouette. I moaned each time she did. My balls were full and ached, just like when I was with her. It was cold outside, but I was getting warm with all my layers on.

"Mmm, Jeff. I wish you were here with me," she moaned, looking into the camera.

It felt like she was right there with me in my tent. I stripped off a couple layers and pushed my pants and boxers down to my knees and set my phone against my lantern. My balls hung low between my legs and cock stood straight up. Precum dripped down the shaft and over my knuckles. I gripped my cock tight, imagining it was her pussy. I closed my eyes and leaned my head back, just listening to her moans and her slick pussy sounds. I could feel my balls tightening up. I was going to cum quick. Amy's moans were becoming louder and more frequent. I opened my eyes to watch. Her fingers rubbed over her clit faster. Her eyes were closed, head was back, and mouth was open.

"Oh, my god. Oh, fuck. Fuck fuck fuck, baby! I'm gonna cum! Cum with me, Jeff. Cum with me, baby!" she said, looking back into the camera.

"Fuck, yes. I'm cumming with you!" I said, answering as if she was with me.

I closed my eyes again and imagined her pussylips wrapped around my cock and her mouth and tongue swirling around my cock head.

"Cumming! I'm cumming, baby!" she said.

I opened my eyes and watched her pussy and asshole twitch and muscles contract. She gushed and rapidly rubbed her hand over her clit. I felt my balls twitch and tighten. I pulled back the skin of my cock and sprayed cum all over my sleeping bag at the same time she squirted. Her back arched, and she screamed. My cock jumped and twitched as I tried to catch my breath.

"OH FUCK, JEFF! BABY! CUM WITH ME! AHHHH!" she said.

She sat up and looked back into the camera. She smiled and pulled the camera close to her pussy and spread her soaked lips apart. Her pussy was still pulsating. She gasped each time she ran a finger over her clit. Then she held the camera up and blew a kiss. I sat there, out of breath and exhausted as the video ended. Even when I'm away from everything and everyone, she is with me. I looked outside, and it was dark. I hadn't made a fire yet, and it was supposed to dip into the mid-30s tonight. I grabbed my lantern and made a fire. The heat was pleasant. The sound of the fire crackling and wind blowing through the trees was peaceful. I made a pot of coffee and gazed at the stars, pondering my life and Amy. I looked at my watch. It was after midnight and I went to bed.