All Comments on 'The One for Me Ch. 01-03'

REALLY, REALLY ENJOYED IT, KEEP WRITING

Some good promise for a successful story here, but editing is needed... There is a switch from 1st person to 3rd person omniscient narration in the middle of the first Anna section. And how tall is Ross? "At least six inches" taller than the five feet tall Anna? That would certainly not make him very tall, as described, and a remarkably short "tackle guard" whatever that is, even in high school football.

The main problem is not editing as such, but the lack of a consistent picture of a fundamentalist preacher, his family and his church members. Partly you present the worst stereotypes of such people and then you present the wonderfully, perhaps almost unbelievably, loving family of Deacon Smith. Human life is indeed inconsistent and varied but so far this just idn't very believable.

This story is fantasy. Yes, the characters are exaggerated because that was my intention. I certainly hoped you enjoyed the tale, and I appreciate your feedback. Your honest opinion helps me write better.

This is a good start, and it is completely believable, especially when the story sounds very familiar to a realistic religious upbringing. :-)

I alway knew you had that special kind of talent .

for writing . this story prove it . i just wonder why you never post it before .

you a dark horse . with all the different kinds of stories you have written.

they are numerous. each has it place in your list of brilliant writings

you should do another part of this awesome story .

one last word its outstanding in many ways .

Thanks for sharing this very entertaining story. Looking forward to future chapters.

Good story eventhough Ross' parents are very strict. Now he has to deal with the Smith's strict ways too. They don't seem as demanding as his parents but I can see them doing so especially when it comes to Anna.

I have to agree with Anonymous on your characters being believable. I know people like them. This was a great read, looking forward to the update.