All Comments on 'The Quarterback Ch. 01'

Wasn´t that bad :) , as an German if Football goes to complex simple jump over to the Point where the Story goes on :D

Good beginning!

5

Six pages of football. That is all?

Yawn inducing, should have included a warning at the start that is was not only long, yes you did say it was long but you didn't warn us that it was incredibly BORING!!!!!!!

Always a great day when a new StoneyWebb story is posted. Thanks Stoney 5*!

What a bloody waste of time… and I thought somewhere I would see a saving grace!! Stony Webb seems out of ideas .. so back to propounding the cliche ‘that black guys and white sluts’ one!!

Can't wait for chapter 2.

Tags please

4 women all cheating sluts? Interesting story, but that is a bit over the top.

Had to turn him gay, so Jimmy wouldn't have stolen his fiancés anymore.

Enjoyed it and you write very well, but the whole Jimmy thing just stretched credibility too far. He managed to ruin 3 of his relationships? And I'm sure in the 2nd chapter whoever he marries will cheat on him with Jimmy.

Still want to see how it ends though. Hopefully he finds a normal woman that's not as completely shallow as the ones you've written so far

it's a shame because this story of a substitute player going back and forth and never knowing anything about his future, was a really original idea and it seemed to change super star players.

On the other hand, the description of her love life and the loss of all her partners through Jimmy is boring, repetitive and ultimately just a little stupid.

that sounds pretty racist.

You make all bad guys look like black guys.

He gets all his wives robbed because of big black cocks.

It's okay if he's a bad fucker and a small dick.

He can still eat pussy.

What's wrong with kneeling for the anthem? We kneel to pray, to propose, to get knighted - are we showing disrespect then?

Has potential but, if I wanted to read a football story, I would have read sports illustrated. Just a 2 so far.

Waiting for the next chapter hopefully more info on his relationship and some happiness

Really liked the flow. Both love life and football. Felt like a real life.

the entire story was u telling us what happened then going back and butting in details that's not a very good flow. this felt weird from u lots of writing errors I mean I can't get by that but coming from u is weird maybe u couldn't find an editor or something idk. the plot was good as always plus the dialog. but good god all that back-and-forth stuff was a bit painful

This is a great story but honestly even with the cheating girlfriends it belongs in non fiction since this is a football fan fiction story through 6 pages.

Bring on ch.2! Thanks for this tale!

should it be called handball? and why is the national anthem even being played at a football game. guessing ur not minority or know how they are treated here.

Great beginning chapter that kept the readers interest with the the integration of Jason's football career and unlucky love-life. Jason seems to be a magnet for women with the cheating gene in their DNA.

I came at this story from a bit of a different slant. My dad went to University of Miami, and I'm currently living a stones throw from the U of M campus in Coral Gables, FL But I went to University of Florida in Gainesville, as did my daughter. My son, however, chose to go to Tallahassee and be an FSU Seminole. It happens in the best of families. In my sister's case, she and her husband are both Seminoles, as is their #2 daughter. But daughter #1 is a Gator. I really like that girl. The rivalries between those three schools are even more intense that described in the story. For a guy who claims to be weak in his football knowledge, the author got that part spot on. 5 stars.

Q: What do you call a Seminole in a suit?

A: The defendant.

When you boil life down to the essentials you come to realize there are only two kinds of people. There are Gators, and then there are Gator Bait.

Go Gators!

Too much detail about individual games, could have cut at least a page from this slightly verbose story.

On a slightly different tack; it seemed that the main characters girlfriends ended up going out with a black “Adonis”, is this normal in the States, or just coincidental?

Well written though as expected from such an accomplished author.

This is a strange situation. There is no wife in the story. Not much of anything happened. It was pretty much back story for the next chapter, where I expect the shit to hit the fan. All of that said, I enjoyed the hell out of this chapter and will be looking for the next one. I like football and this was interesting for that reason. I will say that I see no reason to mention the race or ethnicity of the characters. It should have no bearing on the story or the character development, in my opinion.

This was so good it didn't occur to that there was very little eroticism. Well done.

They say you should write what you know

Could you put tags on the story please?

I did not expect to read 6 pages of football.

I also did not expect to be semi engrossed by 6 pages of football.

Jimmy must be Professor X with the way he mind controls all these women to just toss their panties aside at a whim.

And he must be a dull mother fucker to miss essentially all the clues each and every time. Because save for mind control, usually it takes a bit of prep work to make a woman cheat

First off, I want to say this is an incredible story. It doesn't matter if people not in Canada or the U.S. understand the nuances of football. Your knowledge and understanding of the game helps dramatically when you present the destruction of Jason's relationships and the hatred of Jimmy. I have said this before, a great story can't be put down until it is finished and leaves the reader wanting more. I'm glad seeing your end note. I want to read more - if Jason finds true love, if he gives Jimmy his just desserts, how his NFL career ends and what is the final outcome of his life. Thank you for this story and I look forward to reading the next part. K

Excellent job as always. Looking forward to the next chapter!

Got whiplash following the bouncing ball.

Inundated enough already with politics in every aspect of daily life, you have to start spewing your views into so-called erotica? Spare us, please.

So far so good. I like this character. I am not a football fan, too slow paced for me. I watched some games now and then but not one since they started taking a knee during the National Anthem. That cost the NFL $Billions. Jimmy looks to be a very easy to hate character. Jason is too nice and has let people walk all over him. Part two should be interesting. Don't make us wait too long.

So far, so good but damn, that's a horrible place to stop. I want to see jimmy run over by 3 semis and then pissed on by a dog.

The guy's kind of a pussy when it comes to his love life. He should have stomped Jimmy's ass the first time and this, "I didn't take any of her calls or texts".... Wow! I guess he showed them.

Great start!

It's only long cause its full of crap

Good. Not great. Rambled a lot. Lack of Jason having any balls was tiresome. And why was Mich State guy Jimmy at tne Florida State draft day party?

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Was a pretty good depiction of a marginal NFL QB. But it just went on and on…

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Didn’t Jason ever talk to his parents about “Jimmy”? Didn’t he ever mention the POS to any of his girlfriends? And every one of them cheats with the guy…or his stand-in?

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Look…story has me hooked enough to want to see the finish..Will Jason ever get even with Jimmy? Will he ever start for an NFL team? Will he ever have a girlfriend that doesn’t fuck Jimmy? Guess we’ll find out!

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4 weak ****

You got a lot of things right about football, but one thing you stated incorrectly and it's really bugging me. In football, there is no "spring training", it's either "spring ball, spring practice or even OTAs" but not spring practice. This is a personal quirk from a guy who was a football coach (on the high school level) for over 30 years.

The personal interactions you've highlighted (so to speak) are very good and overall, I'm enjoying this story immensely!!!

4*, maybe 5, for the writing, especially on a free site. Minus 1 for excessive football details since that is really boring, minus 2 for injecting politics unnecessarily. So a 1* effort.

I will *NEVER* understand people who see athletes kneeling to protest police murdering unarmed black people, and conclude that the *protesters* are the ones in the wrong. Have some self awareness. You are literally taking the side of murdering unarmed black people. There's two sides, and you're on the wrong one. It's that simple.

Read Frederick Douglass' 1852 speech "What to the Slave Is the Fourth of July?" and do some reflecting.

Fuck all these negative motherfuckers with a gigantic horse dick strap on. STFU.

I get a StoneyWebb story AND football? Hell yes!

I liked it. Look forward to reading the next installment.

If you don't like American Football? You probably won't understand. Not my problem. Skip it if you don't like it.

But there are no willing cucks eating cream pies from the wife's diseased hole. No whimpy man wearing his wife's panties and gladly locking his genitals in a cage. No bisexual men fluffing the bull. So this will piss off all the man haters, butch lesbians, and faggots. But that's OK. You can't please everyone. And who the fuck cares what all of those mentally deranged assholes think anyway.

Good start.

I agree with the author - American football is not football. It's more like rugby in hockey gear.

Prattling about football will give you good scores on your home turf. Elsewhere? Well, I gave you two stars because your excursions into game statistics extended this story like a rotten chewing gum. Jason has an arch nemesis named Jimmy. Boohoo!! And Jimmy fucks with Jason's toys. I get that. Don't get me wrong, I despise Jimmy characters. But I can't empathize with passive Jason characters either. His stroke of genius was how he kicked Charlotte's arse! That's the only good thing to say.

Interesting insights and background about the NFL... Go Packers GO, hmm SB 31 was Patriots & SB 45 Stealers. I realize this is a story and there are 2022 predictions of a Packers/Bills SB 57 meeting, buttttt.

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As a toddler I once sat on Saint Lombardi's lap, making you a Packer for life, plus living only 30miles from Green Bay helped too. Hope part 2 is posted soon.

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4.4****, Hooyah, Salutes....

Liking the story but Jimmy as the reason for all the MC's romantic woes is already overused after just one chapter. The fact that Jimmy is somehow able to magically convince _every_ _single_ woman that the MC seriously dates to fuck him OR some other black guy is ridiculous. Melinda, Staci, Wendy, and (assuming the bog standard LW trope heavy plot line that the "bitch comes around") Charlotte ALL deciding to slut it up is disappointing. So he can't physically fight the guy, that doesn't mean there isn't some other way he could fight back or fuck with Jimmy. This first chapter paints the MC as someone who only reacts to life.

Damn! You are an extremely talented writer. Thanks for posting and looking forward to part 2!!

Soo much fooootball. I am not a fan of just about anything that involves a ball. Collegiate and professional ball players are way overhyped and idolized. For the MOST PART they are self centered and egotistical. One great thing about the coming Apocalypse is that organized sports will most likely cease to exist. We will probably convert our stadiums into what they actually were meant to be....Coliseums. I caught a good glimpse of the attitudes of the entitled athlete when I was in college. I am amazed how many passes they get on embarrassing, if not illegal, behavior they are responsible for. Yet our society has been embracing this system for over a century. If any 'common' man lived the same life, sans the athlete part, he would likely be spending time in jail or being sued into bankruptcy.

Where is Chapter 2?

Anon boring: shut up bitch

I don’t rate 5 stars often, I’m liking the MC and can’t wait to read the rest.

Great story so far. Hope we see chapter 2 soon. Thanks for posting.

Great story telling. I'm hooked.

Damn!!!

Now I have to wait for next chpter.

Stoney, you really have me begging for more

Five deserved stars

Come on we ALL know how this would go

Got me hooked. Looking forward to your next installment.

Excessive football or not, the story was well crafted and broke off in an appropriate spot. I actually want to stick around and see how our hero finally deals with Super Jimmy. If the second (and hopefully, the last) installment takes too long however, my ADD will kick in and I’ll forget all about this!

He’s kinda clueless. The way that he losses track of the girls in his life easily that they easy prey for other guys makes him seem really stupid. Once, shame on them, twice or more and he’s fucking stupid.

Lots of football talk, which i ejoyed, but it limits your audience.

Good start. Maybe a tad too heavy on play details but the story is good.

Totally agree on the 'kneeling', used to be a big fan of football and basketball but have quit both. Plenty of other ways for those guys to get their message out, without trying to antagonize guys like me. This was a nice refresher of what I once enjoyed. I can understand, if someone hates football then they won't like this story, but I'm enjoying it a lot. A clear 5.

The big problem with this story is that the protagonist is a moron and it's hard to like really stupid people.

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How many times did Jimmy get to fuck his life over while this guy just took it?

When he was dating girls, he should've warned them about Jimmy deliberately sabotaging things. Instead he never said shit, making it easy for Jimmy to wreck one relationship after another.

I would've retaliated after the first incident in the cafe, but the clincher was the Gina/Tabot thing. Everyone liked the protagonist. Everyone hated Jimmy. How hard would it be to get one of his big mates to do a bad tackle and permanently end Jimmy's football career?

There are countless ways he could've crippled that asshole, which would've ended Jimmy's college football aspirations and kept them worlds apart.

So does he have a drawer full of engagement rings, or is it the same ring getting recycled each time? 😆

Not a football fan, but I like the story so far. It is well written with a good MC. Liking forward to chapter 2.

Even though it's fiction the author got one detail right. If the Buffalo Bills make it to the Superbowl they will find a way to lose in an agonizing fashion.

I get setting Jimmy up as Jason's arch nemesis. But, seriously he's able to get woken to cheat by having other guys hit on them? Bit of a stretch in my mind.

I enjoyed learning a bit about the business side of football, and the story moves well. As a woman, though, I am as tired of the "Jungle Fever" trope as I am of the "big cock" and "Martian Slut Ray" cliches. Out side of - perhaps - trailer trash, normal white women and Asian women are NOT lusting after black men. Police records, low educational attainment, high rates of STDs, low intelligence, poor impulse control, and high levels of substance abuse are not attractive. There are, of course some black men who lack these negative traits, but they are in such high demand by black women that they tend to be narcissistic "players". So, Mr. Webb and other authors, try to avoid using the media and porn generated myths of Jungle Fever driven women in your stories. At least among women, the Jungle Fever trope doesn't pass the "laugh" test.

I hope this wasn't the end, but if it is that's okay as this is a great read.

Amazing story. ***** five five five. Strong in almost every regard. Jimmy is a bit of a teflon-coated nemesis isn't he? I presume at some point we'll be given the details on how all those women blew it with him. At this point they're all looking pathetic and cheap cheap cheap.

Like your other sports story, it doesn't really belong in lw. You spend too much time on background and sports and not on the topic of the category you post the story to.

Good build up, looking forward to chapter 2.

Being an Australian lm not big into Gridiron. After all out Rugby League football, or indeed our Rugby Union Football put Gridiron to shame. Even your own players admit they could stand up to our kind of football. So, l had a vague understanding of how the game is played though l do understand what the Quarterback does.

Your hero seems a good player but is unlucky with Coaches and selections to play.

He has a predilection to choosing weak willed females who are nothing short of hopeless and it is clear he has a predator enemy in Jimmy who honestly just needs to be put down.

I’ve enjoyed the story thus far but l don’t think it is a great story. Just angst piled on top of angst.

But l will read the next chapter to see what happens

3/5

It’s a very good story, but it would benefit greatly with more dialogue.

At any rate, I’m looking forward to the next chapter.

I actually enjoyed this story for itself. Normally I am here for the sex and revenge. However in this story I didn't care about that. I hope the next chapter is as good. 5 stars.

JayZip said

I will *NEVER* understand people who see athletes kneeling to protest police murdering unarmed black people, and conclude that the *protesters* are the ones in the wrong.

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Thats because you are a moron

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First off no one buys a ticket to a movie or a sports even to be told they are a racist, you want to call sometime a racist do it on your OWN time not when you are being paid by the people you are seeking to condemn to provide them entertainment

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Dont take my money and then spend the time I paid for a service to NOT provide said service

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Secondly more unarmed white people are shot by cops than unarmed black people, so the whole premise for the protest makes zero sense, especially when you figure in more than half the black people the media were claiming were unarmed were in fact armed, just not with guns

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I agree, educate yourself

So I know nothing about American football except it should be called handball and is it really a sport when the players have to dress like the local police SWAT force, having said that there seems to be an element of skill to it...but that's irrelevant as it's a very good and entertaining story. Thank you

i enjoyed it!

know nothing about the so called football

I really liked it, a bit long but well written. Looking forward for Chapter 2

I enjoyed it and look forward to part 2

I really enjoyed this read. Looking forward to more! Thank-you

Stopped once I realized the witless racist trash would find this appealing.

I stopped caring about useless white trash Cons long ago, mainly because their intelligence ranks up there with a wet beer fart and their fragile little asses need to stfu.

I fully support the people who did what was right and was NOT disrespectful, except to the racist white trash whos opinions are fed to them by their equally useless pundits.

You are not alone Stoney & @Frank66 they're lots of us who take offense to the kneeling during the National Anthem. Enjoyed the story.. look forward to the comeuppance.. Yes I like to see things get straighten out. Revenge and retribution are a good thing.

I agree with Powersworder. Jimmy screws any girl he gets close to and he not only does nothing to prevent it in the future, but he never talks to the girls afterwards to find out what happened. not that he'd take them back but to find out what Jimmy did if only to prevent it in the future.

I really, really want to give it 5*, but just can't. The story digs just too deep into the football industry, to the point it is a distraction. I played collegiate sports (the other football), so I get all the team/game dynamics, but again, his life turmoil got lost in the football. 4*

Awesome STORY and a great read. This is shaping up to be better than buying a good book. You were already one of my favorite authors. This story bumped you up a couple notches for me. Can't wait for the next installment. As I said...awesome!

Liked but its time jimmy gets fucked up.

looking forward to next part

How is this Jimmy able to take so many of his women?.? Makes no sense! Otherwise a good story!

Interesting story, but is not a loving wife story. The male MC is never married. 4 stars.

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I'm hoping the next chapter resolves the story lines.

A good start to the story. The one thing I didn't like was that Jason ALWAYS seemed to get the short end of the stick. You oughta let him win one or two. Makes for a better lead character. Don't wait too long for the second half.

You have greatly overused the "jimmy" story, Maybe Jimmy cucks him twice but the times after that are not believable and his lack of reaction or payback is totally unexplained. It has gotten REALLY old already. I hope part 2 is much better. Please add some tags and a little less football.

He really needs to stomp a mud hole in Jimmies ass.

American football players who kneel peacefully during the National Anthem are protesting the racist, brutal treatment that people less fortunate than themselves are subjected to every day in America. Descent and peaceful protest are supposed to be unalienable rights for all citizens, not just for racist, white Christians, rich young minorities who risk fame and fortune to attempt to change the Fascist Nazi behavior of cowards who attack those who defend the Government and flag, killing law enforcement and destroying Government property, are to be commended, not maligned.

Walter Mitty goes NFL

Jason is essentially a pussy. He's definitely not QB material.

As others have said, it's hard to sympathize with an idiot. The Jimmy problem should've been taken care of as soon as it was clear he was still holding a grudge. Even if our protagonist wasn't making the real big bucks, he was making enough to have someone's legs broken beyond repair. And with how much of a scumbag Jimmy is, the suspect list would've been a mile long.

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But if nothing else, this first part can serve as a cautionary tale for those who still believe in turning the other cheek when someone has it out for you. Bullies won't leave you alone if you ignore them; they'll continue to raise the stakes until someone or something makes them stop.

Good story but a weak plot with a pro quarterback unable to hold onto his women . That is such a stretch from reality. A so called receiver is able to derail his loves. Lots of questions on this character . No way these women dropped him other than you writing it this way.

Great story.

Harddaysknight, usually I would agree with you that race is unimportant, but in this case you have two different men sleeping with the protagonist’s girls and they call him “white bread”. In this story race obviously is a factor, but not from the protagonist. Nothing he says or does indicates any racism. In fact his continued dating of Melinda after she dated Jimmy shows just the opposite.

The story was okay, though fanciful, and the writing was good. What seemed to me a gaping logical hole was a Michigan State player (Jimmy) showing up on the Florida State campus in what I thought was a football facility. I understand that Jimmy is the Uber-nemesis, but who let him in? I can’t believe that Staci would be able to get in on her own, let alone with a Michigan State player. Am I missing something?

Really enjoyed it. However, one small mistake you made, where you mentioned he didn't even get a partial scholarship at a Division 3 school? Division 3 schools don't offer athletic scholarships.

While I agree with some of the criticism about the character traits of the protagonist, I won't criticize the author for creating a character with such flaws. After all it is his piece and I'm an observer, along for the ride. My criteria is pure entertainment and I very much enjoyed this piece and will be back to read Part II. Normally, I don't read stories that are this long as they seem to drag on interminably, and the background is generally written in a bland, unexciting manner. However, this story kept my attention very well. My preference with stories here is that they keep me engaged with their emotional ebbs and flow; I feed on the emotions, not the graphic depictions of sex. This story met my requirements well. I could "feel" the emotions of the protagonist, especially in the realm of "the betrayals" endured. I look forward to Part II.