All Comments on 'The Reality Engine Ch. 05'

I have read this story from the first chapter, and it is kinda surreal.

But it has a bit of intrigue, however the butt sniff thing. I don't get, that it's a fetish I understand. But it being arousing I just can't comprehend, thus it kinda kills the story for me.

Luckily you do not use it that much, I will still read your story. Just for the mystery of what is going on..

So far the stories read like a strung together series of manosphere cliches. Good ideas, dialogue doesn't sound like anything I ever heard in college talking to girls. Keep writing!

for men who suck up, brown nose, oh I'm certain there's several other derogatory terms for 'nice guys', you can catalog. Frankly, I've heard it, and detested it my entire life. It is a great untruth, and a cynical view of the world, as is this entire tale. It started off as a decent suspense, where the hell is this going vibe with 'the research' connection, but it has derailed on the manhating and cynical view of everything.

i agree with another the dialogue is a bit too mature and sophisticated for coeds when I went to school... well, there were a few who were certainly more 'worldly' than others I met, but then again this is a much more open society than I grew up in, many years ago. Still, they can't/won't/shouldn't all be hot, nasty talkers. Gotta have balance.

Still curious enough about where the eff you're going to keep reading.

GeoD

Kill the butt sniffing. It’s effective without it. It’s nasty and don’t like reading those parts

I don't get the girls in this story, they seem like aliens. at first I thought it was going to make sense but the guys are all weirdly nice and the girls are all weirdly mean. feels like this story was written from the perspective of someone who was treated like Scott and doesn't understand what actually happened, but who understands the guy perspective on it fairly well. I thought it was going to be a mind control fetish story at first but now it's starting to seem like it's D/s alternate reality where nice guys actually finish last, and it isn't simply his self esteem that's the problem. it bothers me because it seems like the characters almost understand each other but then the girls are just unnaturally mean. sighhnn

Oh I think this is progressing perfectly . With some 20 to 1 women to men . Any of the men could just as easily be chewed up and spit out . But these girls have a need to fix Scott . Lucky Scott. Enjoy it while he can . They could still just fatten him up and have him for Thanksgiving . But he will prevail . With their help I hope . The guy below that thinks the girls seem like aliens . That's why it makes sense . Female roller coaster or alien . 6 of one half a dozen of the other .

The girls are all pretty vile, teaching Scott about questionable consent, having dirty assholes, being vile in general, Scott isn't just desperate and naive, he's mentally deficient, no one would humiliate themselves like he does without having a mental illness

@KJay15 Unfortunately, I had to depict the characters in this way at the start of the story, since this is a sci-fi tale at it's heart. If I had to do the start of this story all over again, the #1 thing I would change, in hindsight, is how I started it, it was clumsy. I should have clued in the reader from the beginning that the behavior of the characters is unusual for a good reason, and that it will change as time goes on, especially Scott. I appreciate your comment, similar one has really helped me to improve (I hope).