The Secret Panty Handjob

I didn't have a cell phone in the nineties. Even if I did, text messaging wasn't a thing.

I had an email account through my university, but plenty of people still weren't using email. And even if they were you didn't always know their account.

So I had no way of communicating with Angela. I certainly couldn't call her home phone. She was my aunt's step daughter--basically my cousin, even though we weren't related by blood--and I'd known her since childhood. I'd never once called their house to talk to her. I'd actually spent most of time either avoiding her because she was nerdy and she had an obvious crush on me that everyone else found cute and hilarious.

Everything changed in December of '98. Angela had recently turned 18. I was visiting from college during the winter break and had impulsively grabbed a couple of pairs of panties from my aunt's laundry room to try on. Angela had caught me in the act. And instead of running away in horror and telling her family, she was finally able to act on her long unrequited crush. She jacked me off that night and again the next morning. Then she told me to keep her panties.

I knew it was wrong. If anyone in our family found out they would be devastated. It wasn't incest, but it was definitely taboo. You're not supposed to fool around with your step-relations.

But I couldn't stop thinking about it. I'd had one girlfriend who was fine with a little crossdressing experimentation, but she never understood how much I was into it or that I constantly fantasized about wearing lingerie.

Angela had seemed into it. Encouraging even. It was a dream come true to be "out" and accepted. It just wasn't ideal that it was a family member who found out. Although, in a way, that made it even sexier. Two taboos instead of one.

I was conflicted in the days that followed. I'd lock myself in my bedroom at my parents' house and stroke my dick with a pair of Angela's panties while wearing another pair. I'd think about the way she'd gotten me off. I'd try to picture her plump ass and big tits. And I'd fantasize and wonder how she would moan during sex and what it would be like to fuck her while wearing her panties.

Afterwards I would feel guilty. But it would pass. And I'd spend hours trying to figure out a way to make contact with her. I knew where she went to school and that I could take a chance and drive up there to try and catch her at the end of the day, but that seemed risky. What if someone else from my family was picking her up that day? Plus, she might think I was being a creep. The last thing she'd said to me was "see you at Christmas," so maybe she didn't want to see me sooner. And it wasn't like I was going to go back to college without talking to her again.

Both our family and Angela's family were going to be at my grandmother's house for a few days. My dad's oldest brother had bought an old farmhouse and a lot of land out in the country years earlier and my grandmother had moved to the same area when she retired to get away from the city. We tried to go out at least every other year for the holidays. My aunt did the same, but Angela sometimes spent Christmas with her mom and step-dad instead. The last time I'd actually spent Christmas with her she was still a chubby high school freshman instead of a buxom barely legal senior.

We drove out on the 23rd with a plan to stay through Christmas and the weekend that followed. My uncle's house was a huge renovated farmhouse with four bedrooms upstairs, a master on the ground floor, and a two bedroom mother-in-law suite in the basement. His daughters were both married and out of the house and my grandmother lived in her own house that he had built on his land, so that left 6 bedrooms for guests.

I always tried to grab one of the basement rooms since there was also a big screen TV down there. My cousin--Angela's step-brother--usually did the same. The parents and girls usually took the upstairs rooms, although the girls fussed about never getting the basement, and my dad's youngest brother and his family stayed at my grandmother's place. I was really hoping Angela would find a way to stay downstairs that year but couldn't imagine how.

Once everyone arrived the arrangements ended up the same as usual. I had a room to myself in the basement right next to Angela's step-brother, who I normally loved to hang out with. But I wasn't looking forward to it that year.

Angela was up two flights of stairs in a guest room right next to my parents and across the hall from my sister. It had actually been my cousin Beth's room before she left home. Years earlier I'd snuck in there when everyone was downstairs and taken a pair of her black panties to try on. It was the first time I'd taken them from a relative. After I came I was sure that I was going to get caught sneaking them back into her drawer. There was some irony to Angela being in her room.

That first evening I was desperate to get some alone time with Angela and didn't know how to do it. She was either playing it cool or just being a cruel tease because she barely acknowledged me. There wasn't as much as sly smile or a covert wink when nobody was looking. It was making me nervous. And it didn't help that I was wearing her panties under my jeans and had to be conscious of my movements. I would have a lot of explaining to do if I bent over to grab something and someone saw the waistband sticking up above my belt.

Everyone came over to the big house for dinner. When my dad's youngest brother was greeting everyone he made an awkward joke about how Angela had a childhood crush on me. She brushed it off by saying that it was a silly childhood thing. It was the right thing to say, but it definitely made me wonder if I'd misread things. Was it silly for me to think she had the same feelings at 18 that she'd had in junior high?

The whole situation was making me anxious. I'd gone from worried that I couldn't avoid temptation to feeling foolish about thinking she'd even want to tempt me again. The fact that I was sitting at a table with all my relatives while secretly wearing panties made it worse.

At some point after dinner I saw Angela head down the hall toward the restroom. I knew it would be stupid to follow her, but my stomach was in knots and I had to know where I stood.

"I have to go to the restroom," I announced loudly to my cousin who was sitting nearby.

"Nobody cares," she said.

I went down the hallway to the bathroom door. I heard the sink running. Angela came out a second later.

She was wearing a bulky flaxen cowl neck sweater and corduroy skirt with tights. The outfit obscured all her curves and made her look like an innocent nineties chick who was still clinging to the grunge era.

I think my heart stopped for just a second while our eyes locked. I'd never had any interest in what she thought until a week earlier when she'd given me a hand job in her dad's basement. But in that moment it was all that mattered to me.

She flashed a wicked smile and my heart started beating again.

"Hey, you," she said quietly. She looked down the hall to make sure we were alone and then leaned in close. "Did you pack my panties?"

"No."

"Why not?" she asked in shock.

"Because I wore them instead."

She smiled again.

"No you didn't," she said with a giggle.

"I did. Want to see?"

She laughed again.

"We can't. Not here. Not now."

"Why not? You sucked my cock outside your high school last week," I responded. "Now you're shy?"

"Someone will come," she said.

"I hope I cum," I answered. "And I would like to make you cum, too."

She blushed and rolled her eyes at my cheesy wordplay. For the first time since she caught me in her underwear I felt like I had the upper hand.

"I want you to see," I said.

I took her arm and pulled her into the bathroom with me. I shut the door behind us.

"This is naughty," she said.

"I thought you like naughty," I responded.

"I do. But someone is going to miss us. Or what if someone comes to use the bathroom and we are coming out together?"

"Then they're probably going to have some questions," I said.

"Then hurry," she said. "Show me."

I felt confident. It took my time unbuckling my belt.

"You know, I jacked off with Beth's panties in here once."

"You did not!" she exclaimed.

I assured her that I had.

"I was so scared of getting caught after I came."

"Was that the first time?" she asked. "Did you just see her panties somewhere and act?"

"No. It's a long story. But the first time was a friend's mom."

"You HAVE to tell me later," she said.

I nodded as I pulled my jeans down. I was wearing black nylon panties with a floral print. The same ones Angela had caught me in a week earlier. My cock was getting hard showing them off.

I took Angela's hand and guided it to my bulge.

"No," she protested. "There isn't time."

"Then show me yours," I said.

"I have tights on over them," she said.

"Are they silky?" I asked.

"That's what you like, isn't it?"

I nodded.

She hesitated for just a moment. Then she unzipped her skirt and dropped it just enough to pull out her tights and flash a bit of her champagne colored panties.

"I'll bring them to you later," she said. "They might be damp."

I kissed her then for the first time. Without thinking about it. Her ass was pressed against the bathroom counter and I slid my tongue between her full lips. She kissed back. I put her hand on my crotch and she rubbed my hard dick through the panties I was wearing. Then she put a hand on my chest and pushed me back. She exhaled sharply.

"Wow," she said. "We have to stop."

She stepped toward the door.

"I hope nobody is out there."

She opened it and stepped out and left me there with my jeans down and my cock throbbing in her panties. I contemplated jacking off as I had years earlier in a different cousin's panties, but decided against it.

I went back to the living room and nobody had missed me. Everyone who wasn't staying at the house eventually left. The grown up stayed upstairs to catch up and I went to the basement media room with my sister, my cousin, and Angela to watch a movie. Normally that would have led to half an hour of heated debate, but Angela and I were pretty apathetic. Within a few minutes the lights were down, the sound was up, my cousin was kicked back in a leather recliner, my sister had a sofa to herself, and Angela and I were next to one another on love seat in the darkest side of the room. Everyone was under blankets. My sister told Angela they could share the couch, but she made an excuse about it being too cozy and she didn't want to fall asleep.

Angela's hand found my lap beneath the covers almost immediately. My whole body started to tingle. I was twenty one years old and a college student, so I was no stranger to discreetly fooling around with other people in the room. Years earlier I'd fingerbanged my highschool sweetheart beneath a blanket while we were watching Braveheart on laserdisc with her parents. Her father may have murdered me on the spot if he caught us. And yet that somehow still felt less risky than letting my step-cousin touch me with her brother and my sister in the room.

But I had no intention of stopping her.

Angela was patient. She didn't make any sudden or jerky movements unzipping my jeans. I helped with the belt. We both kept our eyes on the screen and occasionally glanced around the room to make sure we didn't have a horrified audience.

She trailed her fingers up and down my shaft until I was rock hard in her nylon panties. Then she got up suddenly and went to the bathroom. Unlike me, she didn't feel the need to announce it before going.

I sat there under the covers with my jeans unfastened and a boner in her panties. Angela came back a few minutes later and after everyone was settled I felt her hand on my dick again.

She gently lifted the panties and worked my cock out through the leghole. I noticed that my sister had fallen asleep on the couch. She was only 17, but had been allowed a glass of wine at dinner. My cousin was still awake, but he was focused on the movie.

I felt something damp and silky against my dick. I realized that Angela had gone to the bathroom to take off her panties. And now she was stroking my cock with them.

I had to bite my bottom lip to stifle my moans. Her hand movements were slow and gentle. She had no intention of getting me off. She just wanted to stimulate and tease. It was agony and it was amazing.

With her step-brother a few yards away she played with my dick for an eternity. I couldn't focus at all on the movie. I wanted to groan and cum and couldn't do either.

Well over an hour passed before I heard my cousin snoring. My sister was still asleep. And Angela was still teasing my rigid cock with her wet panties. I nodded towards the bedroom I was using. She smiled and got up quietly. I had to take my time quietly zipping up.

I followed Angela to the room and started to close the door.

"You can't," she whispered. "What if they wake up? It will be suspicious. If the door is open we can play it off."

I really didn't care at that point. I wanted to close the door and I wanted to fuck Angela, even though I knew I wouldn't last 30 seconds after being edged for an hour.

We kissed again. She unfastened my jeans and rubbed my cock. I tried to guide her to the bed, but she was resistant. Instead she dropped to her knees in the dark room and pulled my panties down.

Just like a week earlier she tugged the base of my shaft with her silky panties and put her lips on the head. Her lips felt amazing.

I had no chance of lasting long. I started thrusting almost immediately. I held her head and tried to fuck her pretty face. She pulled away and started jerking me faster. I started panting and then exploded into her panties. It was the third time in a week.

"Stay here for a few hours," I pleaded when she stood up.

She kissed my lips again.

"You know I can't."

Of course she was right. But I aching for a chance to fuck her. Instead she just left me with another pair of panties and went up to her room.