All Comments on 'The Signing Bonus'

Nothing to read here but pimps and whores.

The Top 5 Outstanding RIGHT and wrong literary features to be found  in Signing Bonus by Writewinger in my HUMBLE  opinion. 

1) Where Writewinger was RIGHT : This story maintained dramatic tension by having characters wobble under stress , yet not go over the top. There was a core bond between main couple that held them them under the skillfully depicted strain.

Even the interloping ex-swain mellowed after he got a taste and downshifted the pain he was dealing out. A lot of graceful nuances gradually infused to Rollie's character kept him from becoming a quasi-fatal attraction parody. Well played.

2)Where Writewinger was WRONG : Dramatic potential left on table by not having Ritchie ( husband ) encounter Rollie encounter each other in some way and talk about the Eskimo Brother experience .

3)Where Writewinger was RIGHT : I liked the cognitive dissonance brought felt by Gwen during her encounters with Rollie . Excellent job by author showing her enjoying the pampering after the lean fiscal cycle . Yet her foundational, identity as wife and mother the other six days of week was depicted skillfully as well.

4) Where Writewinger was WRONG :  The ending was a bit flat with Gwen slowly regrouping after her debauched night . As mentioned before a finish where the two men actually meet and talk about their common attraction to Gwen with coherent, logical dialogue . Maybe next time.

5) RIGHT : I liked how Ritchie didn't turtle 🐢 up after the humiliation of spouse going from exclusive to being Uber woman . He kept looking for jobs and rebelled against the more onerous specifications of Faustian wife-short term lease.

Bottom Line(s): The author walked the high wire and acquitted himself quite well. Writewinger didn't pander either to BTB or Cuck factions of demographic . 9 pages leaves a lot of space for plot to go in ditch , but all the characters underwent a degree of change that was very credible . Here's hoping Ritchie and Gwen set aside rainy day fund or Gwen may have to hit street…using new car for Lyft.

Ergo the obvious score .

Full marks *****

Another sexual deviant... glad I skipped to the last page... not worth the read, unless the reader is also a sexual deviant.

. . . I do wonder just how many married women had to take the same choices during the long, drawn out recession.

The money was too good, and during the depths of the housing crash, mortgages were being foreclosed on in years, not months, because financial institutions were overwhelmed, and a non performing asset, a mortgage in arrears, was still better on the balance sheet than the dead loss of a foreclosed upon house.

Your story was well written and unlike so many others on here, it does have a possible link to what could happen in real life. Although a really difficult story to read in depth and to understand what the husband must have felt during all this, it does end with a "probably" positive outcome. Rollie has realised that it is not possible to pull her away from her husband and has given up his quest. Richie has held onto his love for his wife through the most intensely difficult experience and Gwen has still managed to keep her head together in spite of the humiliation heaped upon her. They have survived and the story could have been improved by adding a paragraph of 3 years in the future. Rich has been promoted again, life outside of New York is going well and they are moving to a newer, bigger house. Gwen and Rich have put this time behind them, although Gwen likes to visit the salon and get a Hollywood every six weeks because Richie likes it like that. She buys her lingerie from Victoria's secret all the time now and their sex life is as good or better than ever. Rollie has had a problem with a rich industrialist having a heart attack caused by cocaine use at a party at his condo and the police and FDA are involved and a few nasty secrets are coming out of the woodwork for him, his business empire is looking shaky and he has over expanded and his banks are nervously checking how much he owes !

They were too selfish to downsize and start over. Should have sold the house long before foreclosure was a possibility. They would rather give up their dignity than their material possessions. He should have taken a job in the oil fields in N Dakota before letting her be a whore. Those jobs were plentiful at that time. Most of these white collar guys (of which I am one), won't dream of getting their hands dirty. I would go back to my roots and carry a toolbox long before letting someone humiliate my family like this. I think she wanted this and did everything to justify doing it. Both are not good parents.

I think you mean "wreaked" but "reeked" will do on this occasion.

Really highlights the need for a special "Mental Illness" category, even if pretty much everybody only read the first and the last page.

Read a paragraph every other page to get the jest of the story, hope they can put this train wreck behind them and live the rest of their lives in piece and love

but i really dont see this ending happily ever after. i really dont see that marriage working. guess we will never know tho

Ass or Grass, nobody rides for free!

Incredibly optimistic.

The more credible scenario: The two of them try to make it work, but it's never the same. The husband tries to put it behind him, but he has occasional flares where something reminds him of what happened, leading to angry outbursts and interrupted sex. The wife goes back and forth between feeling guilty and trying to make it up to him, to despising him for being an inadequate provider and letting her be a whore while trying to put all the blame on her.

A year later, the final break comes after Rollie gets his final revenge by sending the husband a DVD of the wife's drug-fueled gangbang--which she had never told him about--with a note asking if the husband appreciates Rollie's effort in training his slut for him.

This story pulled me in and I couldn’t put it down. The sex was hot and exciting but I stayed for the storyline. I’d love to see a part 2. They might can work through the differences but I don’t think their marriage will ever fully recover.

i am sure the first night she took him up to the bedroom i would hve left and been gone forever. if i stayed i would have changed beds in the master bedroom and put a lock on the door and the next friday i would be in the bedroom if he got mad and busted the door he would have met a baseball bat and have had the shit beat out of him. she is now his whore and he is her pimp time to take the daughter and beat it let the pimp have the slut and go and make a new life without her

The flow of the story was interrupted every other paragraph by misspelled words. Please stop confusing "seamen" (=sailors) and "semen" (=male ejaculate); you do this in nearly every story you've published here and many commenters already mentioned it before.

If you cannot find another editor - contact me. (I normally edit scientific or technical texts - but I could try.)

Despite all the errors the story was gripping and the characters were well developed. You should think about an epilog. I think it would rather be in the line of Valints comment than like the anons (a difficult read) proposal.

Hope the husband divorces her and gets custody of their daughter

I agree with @ScorpioJJ...Two low life characters easily corrupted by a vengeful rich man...Now their life is destroyed and soon they will be divorced, and she will be drugging and whoring herself...1*

One of those really hard reads. Enjoyed is definitely not a word to describe reading this, but it drags you in, beats you up and then spits you out. Mind you, it's not as harsh as Hannah's Corruption by 3Diddly.

That said there are some questions need answering...what was in the contract? did Rich read it, I got the impression he stayed in the den when that was done? Not suing for alienation of affection would have been a huge alarm bell as to Rollie's goal. Hell's bells the whole indecent proposal should be ringing them load and clear. What happened after that weekend? Did Rich get the job? Did he find out about the party?

Then there's self questioning these stories raise - if you're a woman would you? if you're a man would you allow it? And how do you think you would react to it, stoic, angry, dirty? For the women, do you think you would be seduced into thinking it was more than it was? Start down that road and this story should be put in a horror section.

Oh Robert Reynolds? Indecent Proposal - $1 Million for a single night.

So were they able to start over?

Could she ‘turn it off’?

Or did she enjoy the thrill of selling herself, or the cheap sex, or the lesbian sex, or making more than hubby from sex?

Basically: how does it end?

Rich and wife go head over heals in debt with no reserve - what the hell is the matter with people. Didn't expect a crash - nobody expects one but you have to plan for downturns and not mortgage your ass (and in this case his wife's ass). Good story but a bit long on the Rollie revenge story and no retribution to that asshole. Otherwise well written.

Besides hiding the $50, how is she going to explain that amount of money? Tips? Shame on him, if he is not asking question about the cash flow of their monthly expenses and slut revenue.

Frankly, the author penned a good dramatic story but the adult characters are complete idiots and the poor kid is destined to fall in life if she takes after these two assholes (alleged parents).

I lost interest when the limp wristed husband agreed to let his wife be a whore. He should have shot himself in the head and saved the rest of his family and especially his daughter the misfortune of being raised by such a worthless sack of crap... This guy is the best example of complete waste of skin that I've read about for a while....complete loser.

Thanks!

But the lack of a satisfying ending was distressing. I mean you had an ending, but it didnt deal with their life going fwd or if her many deceptions came to light and how that was resolved. Did you lose interest at the end, seemed like a bit of a rushed or truncated ending.

One day a rich man got out of his car and someone stepped behind him and shot him in the back of the head. Who would do such a thing

Degradation is a choice. She fucked for money, so she's a prostitute. So what? Plenty of women are prostitutes. When Rollie sends Ritchie the DVD of her whoredom it will be the impetus to finally legally end what she destroyed. You pays your money and you takes your chances. She chose poorly. Happens all the time. Bye bye marriage and husband. Hello living the rest of her life in regret and misery.

What a wonderful story.

The wife is a prostitute and this 50 year old sack of garbage is not only ok with that but went lower his job standard to support his family while his hooker wife is caring for their kid.

Just gross

I confess that I couldn't make it through the whole story. It would have been better if the husband and wife joined together to make fun of the rich loser who had to pay for the pussy he couldn't win. They could have left him cream pies to swallow. Instead they both went their own ways. You put a lot of work into the story but I didn't care for it. 2 stars

reasonable man

Good take on this moral vs money dilemma. Survival can bring about our base level instinct to survive.

The lack of financial planning, the desperation and the aftermath. But the negatives really outweighed the good. They’re in their mid-40’s and yet they act like they’re in their 20’s with the drama. And if they’re so broke, how can he afford alcohol?

And banks don’t want property, they want money. So if you’re on hard times, the bank can and will help. The idea that no one could or would help is...unrealistic.

And if Rollie is so obsessed with his ex that he refuses to marry and plots an elaborate plan to humiliate her, then she was right to dump his ass. Seriously, why get that worked up over a girl you didn’t even get to first base?

Ending was hurried and incomplete. You'd already gone 8 pages, a couple more paragraphs to the ending wouldn't have hurt.

Ambitious plot that works. I liked it. Interesting enough .

Want to give you 3*s but gave you 4*s. You deserve the extra * as you continue to follow your own path. I have enjoyed and liked your stories. I have disliked and found disturbing other stories. Nevertheless you are using your talents to explore different plots, characters, ideas. That is a very good thing Writewinger 😌👏.

I thought the story wasn't long enough !! As the feelings of "Rolle" were never explored. His true love is turning into a prostitute. She will do anything for money. I am taking advantage of her, instead of actually helping her, using my social network the help the husband get a new job. What kind of person am I, Rollie, now ?! Now that she is "tarnished goods" who am I going to date, lol?..

Thank you for the story Writewinger. Read you next time, I'm

AMerryman

What a mercenary short-sighted whore.

She threw away her long-term happiness with a husband who adored her for a bit of cash. Their married life is in ruins... Rich will never forget being humiliated like that and every time she sees those flashes of anger and pain, she'll feel shame and regret for what she did.

Rollie might have well said, "I'll offer you $50,000 to get my revenge on you and your husband, and ruin your lives. Interested?"

And like an idiot she agreed.

People make it through hardships everyday. So a real man takes what ever job he can find maybe the wife gets a job at another department store, Find a place you can afford on your new salaries rent out your house or let the bank have it. A house is just bricks and boards a home is where you go to be with the people you love they were stupid and too materialistic and if this were a real story it would cost them a 20 year marriage and rob their daughter of her happy childhood.

I do agree with the comment that the ending was a little rushed but overall this was pretty good. I think you manage to capture that situation where someone is judged by people that have a hand in what they’re judging other people for. Which can be real frustrating. Good job.

Swear I read this here a few years back. Repost? Twin?

First and foremost I would’ve went in attack mode just at the suggestion of fucking my wife. Deep down she snuck the comment about him not being small when hubby meant his height but she meant his cock . She might love hubby but she really enjoyed the other cock and she was holding secrets to help keep it going. That last night when the girl told her there was drugs in the champagne and she asked her to do coke is when she should’ve said this isn’t for me and walked out . She knew there was a good chance hubby was getting a new job but she liked to fuck other cock with that I feel so guilty after the fact bullshit cheaters always say. She don’t even know how many guys fucked her that night . Obviously the guy knew it was the last time and she was drugged and he left her a note with cash. Imagine he was planning the end and tapped that night and sent it to hubby to see what they did to her and how much she loved it.

I’d rather kill him and go to jail or live with next to nothing than be humiliated, emasculated and abused by anybody. Her eagerness would’ve killed the marriage before it happened

chute, not shoot

semen, not seaman

another one I shoulda noted before moving on.

However, this was a poignant & painful story of how dependent we are on the world turning the same way (or better) for most of us (mou.) And how little ‘mou’ prepare for anything negative happening around us, personal or global.

Only major quibble is that the ending was too unlikely. If Rollie were really mostly pissed at Hubby, he would have video-taped several of the encounters and sent a Blu-Ray DVD of Sweetie’s debauchery. Or let Sweetie know of it (assuming he really still felt some semblance of kindness towards her) and demanded she fly back and ‘see’ him occasionally.

My wife and I had financial problems, her boss in a Jewelry store offered her $500 for sex. She actually considered it, and asked me what I thought.

I said "NO!", told her to quit. I didn't go belt her boss one but I thought about it.

We lost our house, and lots of other stuff, lived for 5 months in a 1966 Chevy Nova, camping out.

Best time of our life, picking up empty pop and beer cans to get gas to reach the next campground.

That $500 was not enough, a million bucks would not have been.

There is always a way.

Far too abrupt of an ending. Rich, whose perspective should be as compelling as hers, became a virtual non-entity for the last two-thirds of the story. Had a lot of potential.

Thanks for the laugh!

...if you'd have reviewed the submission rather than relying on spell check. That said, I did enjoy the story; thought telling it from both perspectives was well done, and particularly enjoyed Gwen's perspective. Two things I anticipated but didn't occur: what was Richie working on in the basement? Thought it might be a coffin for Rollie. And also expected Rollie to buy the note on the house, totally owning both Gwen and Richie, and humiliating him in the second worse way possible. So, with that I give a 4.5, and let the computer round up.

Rich should start bringing escorts home for a couple of months after he gets back on his feet while Gwen has to sit in the den.

A very accurate rendition of a phenomenon that I’ve been exposed to on more Han one occasion. Thank God we’ve never been there. Xoxoxo Annette

There is too much emotional drama left on the table for this to be complete. I like the story and think it was pretty well written, but feels incomplete and lacks closure. There are too many things unresolved, like, does Gwen still disrespect Richie? Does Richie ever regain his self respect? Does he get the Job? Does Gwen even want to move given her new found sexual awakening? Does Gwen come clean about her true feeling about him and her new enjoyment? There is no closure to the story, therefore it feels incomplete.

A well written story that has as much drama as eroticism. I enjoyed it and even re-read it.

I really could not stop reading until the end. I got confused with the switch of people telling the story, but it still had my interests, and I could not stop reading. it was well told, and has lot of ways to go for additional chapters. yes, five stars.

the husband was the closest thing to a decent person and he was a pussy putz. The instant she indicated an interest in being a prostitute, he should have been planning his exit. Let her be a whore. Find a job and then dump her. Gather the evidence of her whoring and use that to keep the kid. Someday, when he can, after his kid is married off, find a way to put a bullet in the ex boyfriend.

I felt the end was hurried but a great compelling read

A good Literotica story needs to be two things, erotic, and a good story. This is both. Most of the stories above it in the rankings are neither. And yet, there's still a lot of room for improvement. Some of the sex scenes - especially early on - are too briefly summarized to be erotic. On the story front it seems to get too moralistic and preachy toward the end. With a rewrite or two this could be one of the all time greats.

The husband and wife reluctantly agree to let her become a whore so they can keep a good credit rating? LOL. Doesn't anyone know what the word 'sacrifice' means anymore? A nice car, a nice house, good job, good credit rating - they're the most important things in the world? LOL. How sad.

I figure Rollie set up the interview for Richie in NY, and it was probably just a scam to get rid of him for the weekend. Rollie knew all about it right away, so I wouldn't bet on getting that job.

What Gwen failed to realize is that Rollie hated them both, not just her husband. Richie had already been taught his place in the marriage, he was keenly aware of his value. So the Saturday party was nothing more than the coup de grâce; making Gwen face up to what she'd become. That party was the final step for him, he was finished with his revenge.

Maybe the marriage will survive, maybe it won't, but it will never be what it once was - and after reading the story, who cares?

... que je laisse une critique sur ce site. Je dois traduire en français et ce n'est pas toujours bon mais malgré cela, je perçois de l'humain dans l'histoire et ça c'est vraiment une découverte ici. Bravo ! Bravo !

Needs a real ending epilogue maybe,

JB got it right.

Total turd of a story.

But reminded me of those long pencil shaped fireworks we had for bonfire night. Stuffed the end into a bucket of sand, set it alight then watched a spectacular display sparks and flames. It lasted for some while ,it did nothing more or less just went on and on. was there a big bang at the end?, no it just fizzled out. I liked this story, it did not end with a bang or a whimper, it just fizzled out.

We know you're in to cuckolding, but that was your ugliest one!!

I love the psychological elements of your stories

If you are a Cluck You will like this Story

that the whole point was to humiliate the husband w/ collateral benefit of fucking the others guys wife(and make her feel like a whore)

very sad pathetic story

I really enjoyed the story, but it needs an actual ending. The story, as you wrote it, has no conclusion. It's just incomplete.

i dont understand all this if only HE could get a job. why cant she get a job? well other that being a prostitute

he never came back from new york

Most of the writers stories leave one with a sour taste in the mouth ...The EMP attack being the worst...this comes close! I can only deduce that the writer is a clone of Matt moreau or has a submissive kink that wants degradation all the time...will he be found in one of the dom-sub gatherings with a ring in his glans being led around like a dog? Maybe with a butt plug also shoved up?

They both should have decided that the cardboard box option was better than the prostitute option. She is not worth keeping. He should take the job, take the daughter and leave her to her future as a street walker coke head.

Does the author really fantasize this stuff?

I don't like humiliation stories and yours probably scored so low for it. But I gave it a high mark for the supposedly reconciliation ending.

This also seems like another of your stories here that are just a prelude or intro to a longer story. You have developed strong, complex and interesting characters. You've placed them in a critical life situation. What happens to them now. Will Gwen's whoring experience leak over into the new reality of the new job? What if the job interview fails? Will she actually live in relative poverty if it comes to that? Will Ritchie learn to forget Gwen's seeming attraction to Rollie and his money or will this experience eventually poison the relationship and marriage?

There's so much more to explore and relate.

If you can't finish a story you should not submit. I have enjoyed your stories but even though well written this is one I did not like,maybe if you had spent the time to finish it I could have a better feel for it,ts just incomplete. JZK

Marriage won’t survive, she liked what she was doing and will find a way to continue.

The NO ending sucked & ruined it all.

When she greeted Rollie with a deep kiss &waxed for him (he saw it before her husband)

It was over for me.

If I were in those circumstances my solution would be to have my wife collect all my insurance Money.

Of course I’d never get in that circumstance because we always lived within our means.

And when both kids attended expensive universities needing a specific degree I totally changed careers to support them.

She became a total slut well before the party.

Bill S.

I truly feel it was left unfinished

Well written and far more interesting than most in this genre but, while I understand the author's choice of an open ending, there were a few too many questions left unanswered to elevate it from the good to the great.

LA

short incomplete ending. 1*

Is there a sequel to this unfinished story

There is always another way. They should have thought about the cardboard box before whoring. Both very weak people. Their daughter deserves better parents.

+1 to "short incomplete ending"

The premise was great, the build up was good, but then the story completely imploded on the last page. Would love to see another literotica author rewrite how this ends.

Excellent storyline and presentation. However I agree with others that there is still more of the story that can be told. Please do so !!!

You have WAY too much time on your hands. No social life? Who has time to write an 8-page story?

(Who has time to READ an 8-page story? Not me)

Don't like stories that MC has "no wat out" scenarios. Lie isn't that vacuous. A Masters in finance absolutely can't find a job anywhere? Come on, get a little realism into stories.

Also the fact that the story abruptly ends with no repercussions for choices made. 2 stars at most.

Just so wrong, everyone is bankrupt morally and just plain sickening type scenario. Nor realistic to think this will end well for any of the described characters in this setting.

Fantastic story, really enjoyed it. Tbh though, initially I though the story would get much more dark and I was looking forward to it. Salivating really ^_^. So when it didn't I was disappointed. I wanted more. I thought you were really going to turn the screw and show us two people being driven apart.

Well written overall. I do wonder why you switched to Gwen's POV halfway through. I did enjoy getting her side but somehow felt that you could have shown more of the couple drifting apart. But in the end, you kept it realistic (to my chagrin hehe), and Richie didn't drive Gwen in to the arms of Rollie.

5 stars. Thanks for writing and sharing. And as always, ignore the loving wives haters, your story is at least. 4.6, maybe better. Good luck!

This woman doesn't deserve her family. She's just a whore with some extra steps