The Sophisticates

WARNING - CONTAINS DESCRIPTIONS OF ACTS THAT ARE CERTAIN TO OFFEND AND CAUSE DISGUST. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

Inspired by Gilbert Gottfried (RIP)

A talent agent is sitting in his office. Scripts and books are piled up on every available space. He's middle-aged and balding and sweating in the New York summer heat. He's reading intently. There's a knock on the door.

"Come in," he says, putting down the script.

A group walks in. It's obvious they are a family. It's a young man and woman and the family dog, a small white terrier. Following behind is an older woman, and a much older man, probably the grandmother and grandfather. They're all grinning.

"What kind of an act do you do?" asks the agent.

The father immediately springs into action. He clears a space in the middle of the room and turns to his wife. She steps back and pulls off her summer dress in one motion, revealing that she is completely naked. Her breasts are large, her nipples erect. Her pussy hair is neat and trimmed but not shaven. She tosses her dress to the old man who catches it deftly despite his advanced years.

"Thanks Dad," she says.

The younger man (the husband) strips his own clothing off as quickly as he can. His wife stands watching, legs open, the fingers of one hand spreading her pussy lips, the fingers of the other hand buried deep inside, frigging away. Her husband's cock is fully erect. Within seconds he's on the floor, inside his wife who is on her hands and knees. He starts fucking her like he has a train to catch, fast and hard. His wife is grunting with each stroke. Soon they're both panting and slick with sweat. The smell of sex is strong in the air.

The old man unzips and reveals his own thick red uncircumcised prick, dripping with pre-cum. Unlike his son-in-law he's not been trimming - his mass of white pubic hair makes him look like an elderly Rastafarian in the downstairs department. He approaches his daughter and feeds his cock into her eager mouth. She sucks with obvious enjoyment. Each time her husband slams into her from behind she is pushed onto her father's cock, making her gag, but she's obviously up for this. The old man sheds his own clothing, staying inside his daughter's mouth as much as possible. His body is wrinkled but he's not in bad shape for an 80-year old, and he's obviously been taking his viagra.

"You look so pretty with my cock in your mouth my girl," says the old man, thrusting in and out. His daughter's mouth makes a seal around his epic schlong, and she's clearly skilled - she's sliding her tongue underneath the dick as she sucks it, adding more stimulation. Her mouth is bulging around the large mushroom dick, saliva and pre-cum dribbling out the corner of her mouth and onto the floor.

His son-in-law is starting to speed his strokes up. "She's an amazing cock-sucker alright, all those years of training you've given her have really paid off," he says, punctuated by his grunts. The pretty squeals of his wife make a higher-pitched counterpoint.

Suddenly, the grandmother shouts "Ho!" and the two men switch positions - it's clearly part of the act. The agent catches a glimpse of the young woman's yawning pussy; her husband's girthy cock has fucked her wide open. It's a good thing too - her father's cock is significantly bigger so she needed the preparation. She grunts as her Dad slides himself in to the hilt, then gags as her husband's dick slides down her throat at the same time.

All this time the little dog has been running around the room, yapping and barking. The grandmother is by this time stark naked and is masturbating to the live sex scene. Unlike her husband the old lady has not been taking care of herself - she's tubby and wrinkly, her tits hanging like long leathery tubes. Her pussy lips are long - she is completely clean-shaven.

Again the grandmother shouts "Ho!" and the room is a blur of motion as everyone changes position. Now the wife is tongue-fucking her mother while her husband is sucking off his father-in-law. Another cry of "Ho!" and this time the young man is ass-fucking the old man while the young woman is being fisted by her mother. By moving around the two men manage to position themselves so the women can lick and suck the men as they energetically pound each other.

The wife starts to lick her husband's ass-hole while he continues to fuck the old man. All of a sudden there is a series of farts from the young man, followed by a stream of diarrhoea that jets onto his wife's face, spraying onto the floor. The agent moves his chair back, and is holding his nose, desperately trying not to vomit.

Now the old man is shitting on the floor too, his guts obviously loosened by the merciless fucking he's just had from his son-in-law. This is too much for the two women and they begin to vomit, adding the contents of their stomach to the pools of shit and cum on the floor.

But where did all the jizz come from, you ask? I forgot to mention that the old man had some strange condition that caused milky off-white splooge to dribble from his cock all the time, and his wife, his daughter and his son are covered with cum, all having by this time sucked the old man off at least once. The dog is running around shitting and pissing everywhere.

Suddenly the agent starts vomiting, and at this the disgusting group, joined now by their vile dog, begin eating the mess on the floor, throwing it up and then eating it again. Then when they can vomit no more, and they've each felched the horrible mixture from each other at least once, they all start slipping and sliding around the floor on the cum and the vomit and the piss and the shit, going "Weee, weee, weee!" and laughing insanely.

Suddenly they all stop, even the dog, and the room is silent. Then they all take a bow, even the dog, who has clearly had special training.

The talent agent says, "Well, that's an interesting act. What do you call yourself?"

The father says, "The "Aristocrats".