All Comments on 'The Taming Ch. 01'

Her mouth slid over my shaft, as her left hand stroked it. Those full lips I'd kissed for the first time only moments earlier swirled over the tip of my cock, as my nutsack contracted. Her hungry mouth needed my cum and in mere moments would receive it...

versus

"She got on her knees and gave me an amazing blow job that lasted for nearly 15-20 mins."

Which one is hotter?

You have a good first draft. Go back and rewrite all the details you left out. You know you have them in your mind, just get them down on the paper.

Fun theme. Do something with it.

As a very general rule of thumb, try not to have characters with similar names. Arti, Aby, Amrita... Too many "A" names, makes it harder for the reader to get a clear picture of who is who. Just sayin'