The Training of Jeff Stintum Ch. 18

Sarah reached out and stroked his cheek lightly with a long finger...the same finger that had ravaged his asshole not long before. "Remember, Jeff? I'm studying orthopedics?"

"Uhhh," said Jeff, his tingling nerves distracted by her finger, "right. Oh yeah, right! Uh...bones! The study of bones, right?"

Sarah nodded down at him kindly, continuing to stroke his cheek. "Right, Jeff," she said softly, "the study of bones, muscles, and joints." She kept looking at him steadily as she talked. "I guess I should be thanking you— this topic is super interesting, and maybe I'll even turn my conference paper into a journal article. Who knows?" She smiled at him lovingly. "But of course, Jeff, the really important thing, what I really care about, is that you are ok." She paused, considering him silently for a moment. "Are you nervous?"

"N-nervous?" asked Jeff. "About...about what?"

"Your surgery, Jeff," said Sarah calmly. She had taken her finger off his cheek.

"Oh. Uhhh...not really, no." In truth, Jeff had barely thought about his surgery. He couldn't even remember when it was.

"That's good," said Sarah. "I've got you through the whole thing — we're all gonna take really good care of you and make sure you come out ok."

"Th-thanks," managed Jeff. Sarah's tone confused him. Should he be nervous?

Sarah kept smiling down on him. "You're cute in those clothes, you know that?" He looked up at her eyes, which playfully regarded his. Did she know what he was wearing? Had she planned this whole thing?

"Ahaha, thanks," laughed Jeff nervously.

"I haven't really gotten a good look at those clothes in...quite some time," said Sarah exquisitely drawing out her words.

"Uhh yeah! Well...uh...they fit me," said Jeff.

"Yes," laughed Sarah through affectionately-squinted eyes, cracking her mouth in a wide grin that showed her lovely teeth as she nodded her head up and down, "I can see that." Her body shook slightly as she chuckled genially down at Jeff, who didn't know what to do. After a few moments Sarah's soft laughter died down and she was just looking at him, her head cocked to the side, a slight smile on her face. Jeff felt the pressure grow in his head and around his body as the silent moments passed by, with Sarah just staring at him wordlessly, shamelessly, as the smile disappeared from her face. What was she doing? He bowed his head, once again unable to meet her eyes. He felt like a piece of meat.

"You know, Jeff," she said suddenly, her full voice quietly cutting through the silence, "I would really hate it if you grew to despise me." There was a slight hoarseness to Sarah's voice that Jeff had not heard before. He looked up at her, and saw that there were big tears in her eyes. He felt the sickly waves of electric jolts jar his insides. This unfamiliar emotional territory frightened him.

"D-despise you?" he stammered. He shook his head. "H-how — how could I...I despise you?"

Sarah took a great deep breath and blinked heavily, allowing the tears to drop from her eyes. They landed directly on Jeff's forehead, splashing his eyes a bit.

"S-sorry!" said Sarah thickly, through her emotion.

"N-no, no! It's ok!" said Jeff, thoroughly alarmed as he wiped off his head. "D-don't worry about it Sarah!"

"Thanks," she said. She folded her hands together in front of her. "I just..." She seemed to be at a loss for words. Jeff's mind was frantic now, hunting around like a little squirrel, in search of some kind of a way out, some kind of a solution. But he had no idea what was happening.

"Jeff," she said seriously, her voice barely quivering with emotion. She seemed to have found her words. "I really need you to tell me if anything that we do...if any of our play...makes you feel bad after we're done." Jeff looked at her vacantly, not understanding what she was saying.

"I mean," she said, sniffing her nose and wiping her eyes with her hand, "I know when we're in the heat of the moment, you know, when we're playing...things can get a little blurred. You know?" Jeff nodded, not understanding anything.

"And...it's difficult to know how much is too much, and when to stop, you know?" Jeff nodded again. He felt reassured that Sarah was talking to him, instead of just staring at him with tears in her eyes. He didn't really know what this was about...maybe she felt stressed out by school? He contented himself with watching her big hands move around as she spoke — they were mesmerizing.

"I — uh," said Sarah, getting choked up a bit again. Jeff started to feel scared again — what was wrong with her? "I should have talked to you about this earlier," said Sarah, "but...well, we're talking about it now." He was utterly confused. Talking about what?

"Listen to me, Jeff," said Sarah seriously, getting down on her knees so that she was looking Jeff right in the face. "When we're playing, things get complicated, right?"

"Uhh...right," said Jeff. What else was he supposed to say?

"Now, this is very important." She took her two hands and brought them up to Jeff's face, so that her hands were holding his entire head. Jeff felt her fingers snake around the back of his skull and he sighed in pleasure.

"Stay with me, Jeff. Look at me." Sarah wasn't playing around, and Jeff did as he was told. Her sea green eyes bore into his once again, and forbade him to look away. Her tears were gone.

"Any time we're playing," said Sarah carefully and deliberately, "and you want to stop playing, all you need to do is say one word, Jeff. One special word, and I will stop playing immediately."

"Uhhh...ok?" said Jeff, unsure of what Sarah was getting at here. Why would he want to stop playing?

"That word is this, Jeff, and I want you to say it after me: RED."

"Red."

"Good, Jeff. One more time: RED."

"Red."

"All right." Sarah looked at him seriously a few seconds more and stood up. "This is all very important, Jeff. You have to understand that we respect each other's boundaries when we're playing."

"Uhh, right," said Jeff.

"And when you don't like something or aren't sure of how you feel about something and want it to stop, you don't need to justify or explain anything to me. All you have to do is say — " she gestured wordlessly with her hand.

"—red," said Jeff.

Sarah smiled. "Good." She closed her eyes tightly and opened them as she turned her head up, looking at the ceiling for a moment before she looked back down to Jeff. All traces of her previous emotion seemed to be gone and she seemed content and happy.

"Well!" she said, smiling at him. "Let's get ready for bed."